₦airaland Forum

Fhemmmy:
Now i see your stand, the woman should walk away with nothing and the man takes the house and the kids I guess according to your "she has an income" theory.....
if you're the man, you would sleep at peace in such home?
Lemme guess, you probably throw those kids out too for her to sort them out and you do big boys in club at night, while kids that are used to family income of 135k$ per year will now have to depend on 35k$ per year.....
I hail, sir... na you biko.

i never said such. you are inputting that yourself

is it fair that a woman is entitled to wealth she did not participate in

Should assets pre marriage be shared

No need to be sensationalist to impress our ladies here

Fhemmmy:
I cant see you not reading me at all, sir..... let us take a example of 2 couples.
Mr and Mrs Joe.... oth working, husband making 100k $ a year, wife only 35k a year
Mr and Mrs Ada... husthusband making 50k$ a year and wifey maing 45k $
Tell me if both have been married for 10 years with 3 kinds ages 10,7, and 3.
Things fall apart and divorce happens.
Be the judge, how should things be..... woman did not commit adultery oh

Answer the question yourself
she is working and has a source of imcome yet she wants to latch on the man for more money?

rman:
Stop trying to convince Fhemmy.

Women want equality with men, but they always approach all issues with men from a position of weakness.

They wait for the men to approach,they prefer older men, richer men, stronger men. They also want to profit by dating or marrying men. Even the biological role of mothers that they all crave, men must be made to pay.

I still do not understand the twisted logic!

Make your own damn money and do not see your relationship/marriage as a get away ticket away from poverty and everyone will be happy.

You can imagine some listing sex and taking care of the baby as things they should be compensated for in marriage. So these things do not bring joy anymore the moment the male figure is out of it?

I still do not understand the frankly

He is patronizing women as the weaker sex yet they are debating daily against men taking them as such

This is an opportunity for women to show they are equal and not bogged with traditionalism

After all we went to the same schools, do the same jobs

bukatyne:
My question is very simple
Who owns the baby in standard Nigerian society?

Should a woman be compensated for having a child, her own child

bukatyne:
Who owns the child in standard Nigerian culture?

Madam

Make your point rather than asking roundabout questions

Fhemmmy:
Chairman, I think we all have wrong impression of how this things are done, they look at your income and debt and expenses and check that of the woman but alimony is awarded but on child support, my brother, no matter how much it will take care of my kids to be provided for. I am fine with it...

Which impression

Why should a woman be compensated for her time with a man
Are the sexes not equal again

They want to be independent yet kept at the same time

Does it make sens

Alimony is from an era when women had no choice but to be subservient to men in marriages so if they were thrown out they had nothing

Now they re empowered yet marriage is an office to them

Fhemmmy:
Now is that the norm? nope BUT is it too much to ask for the woman to be treated right and if things fall apart, she walk away with half of what you jointly posses?

Ok

So you build your auto empire then u marry a chic and things don't work out after a while

So Your ex is entitled to half of what u had built pre marriage because what she was your ex


What happened to her own skills

Are both parties not equal anymore

Why should one party use marriage as a means of enrichment

coogar:
if you can't beat them, you join them na. tpïa is just bedazzled about how organised we are here unlike her fellow gender.

Lol
Watch out for her customary rants

TV01:
And who wouldn't want to show compassion - but is it the only chance?


I'm no geneticist - by a long shot, can't even claim much elementary science knowledge , but all sorts of scenarios come to mind. I hope they are mostly mute or they have them covered off.


TV

Yes..its a chance

No one can know exactly where it will lead

That's science

coogar:
you mean you aren't convinced she's female?

I know it is
Im more concerned about its trolling abilities

TV01:
I am not sure it's that simple, or the process as described.

The nucleus of the embryo with the mitochondrial problems is removed and placed in ann embryo with issue free mitochondria.
Essentially, you have 2 embryos to start with and only one at the end. One is in a sense "killed", hence the ethical opposition by some.

You got it right
Nothing beyond the average is ever simple.
The degenerative diseases caused by mitochondrial issues are terrible
One woman in the bbc article i read a while back lost all her kids and will soon lose the last one

its a chance for families like this

The other question I have is how we know that there are no other consequences?


TV

Yes no one knows the uncharted areas this could lead to

a chance to remove untreatable diseases via mitochondrial transplant

Well i am impressed they called it

That means when they see it in themselves too they will be convicted

As crackhaus said this is the true mentality of the average nigerian woman who sees marriage as an office

Once they marry they see themselves as a employee who should be paid whether business is good or not and not a partner
When the transaction is over, they see the payday as settlement for all the effort they put in

Afterall they gave you their body and children


This lady yes she is honest but she has to move past that

5minsmadness:
Oh for goodness sake!
The hypocrisy and self-righteousness on this thread is utterly disgusting!
The lady simply poured out her heart, how she feels and is looking for a listening ear, NOT JUDGEMENT!

Those ladies above me prattling their mouths and behaving like mother Theresa should swear on amadioha's shrine that the same.thoughts won't cross their minds if they were to be in the same ladies shoes! Haba.
She is looking for help, not condemnation. Some already calling her evil stepmother.

Family section indeed!

MizMyColi:
Pickabeau1
Matthewbriggs

Please what's your opinion?

Another unpleasant news


Well, I need to know more of the lady and her makeup


I will assume she is a more traditional lady who is down with marriage
The guy did not have solid intentions towards her for 2 years or not meeting her parents

- He has made up his choice except she uses the baby to convince him otherwise - not the best considering he is shady himself




- He may take responsibility for the kid eventually but she has a kid which will affect her future prospects - not too optimistic he will take responsibilty

- have the child and raise as her own - what will her parents say, job prospects, school etc

- have the child and give for adoption - a possibility as the dad does not really care

- not have the child at all - we all know the questions around this (trauma of loss, bad procedures etc)

She has to be decisive and be firm whichever path she takes
Her life as she knows it is over

cool

MizMyColi:
I needed the break
Lolz @DustTheWebs.

MizMyColi:
Good to see you
I silently hoped you'd come around.

Same .. good to see you
I noticed you were offline for a period - not too long
I noticed i dont have any way of knowing how you are doing

until i saw you dust the webs off your journal

I don't think 12 years is too much
I've met people with 8 to 10 and they seem ok

When the man is 50 the lady is 38... Not bad

Maybe 15 and above

Good idea...

mutter:
Thank you

Many women remain in an abused marriage so long because they are afraid and ashamed to speak up.
Not just because they are ashamed of the experiences they made but because people write them off as screwed up , weak and so on.

Initially you might get a little bit of sympathy but those that sympathize with you quickly turn round and throw it at you.
We are all human and all guilty of the same, things like this make us aware of our short comings and give us reason to think again.

Aisha is a wonderful lady and has done so much here, helping so many people in need. She is passionate about what she does and caring for the less privileged.
She wrote what she did not to hurt me but she was expressing her hurt for the victims, I respect that !

I hold her in high esteem and I hope you all do so too.

I agree with you that victims are afraid of being shamed hence their hesitance to leave

I hold her in high esteem also and know she was trying to jolt you into empathy but I knew her statement will be used by others for nefarious purposes.

The same point you made was made by countless females here yet you were the only nailed on for 'justifying' murder

Keep it up

Mutter

continue being yourself and continue to advisw on family values
Those who hear will hear

Dont let the family section quest to malign every post and person counter to their mainstream views affect you

Digging up personal history to discredit is really something.... These ladies

You are not the first and will not be the last

Fhemmmy:
I have red it.... so sad for the man, but that is not something usual thus, judge told the man to make a 1$ payment per month for those donkey years

The judge made an unprecedented move doing that
That's the news

Others will force you to pay at market interest rates


There are multiple stories like that

.

I pray you do the sensible thing and leave

Your stepmother complex material is enough to sew for a town.

I'm impressed with the posts of the ladies who r calling it as they see it

A budding evil stepmom

However I respect you for being true to yourself

If more people did this

Things will be better

mizzochocinco:
I am well over 35 and have never had a sensible relationship with a good man

No wonder

There is hope for you

Abuse of authority

Fhemmmy:
I don't think you actually read me well, something or some comments from other people resulted to that statement of mine....

Oh..OK
Those statements are very commonly used by women and manifest from such

Fhemmmy:
If it happens and you have evidence as a nan, use yhe law to your advantage.

Yet the law cannot be changed
Read
https://nationalparentsorganization.org/blog/20435-judge-crafts-unique-remedy-in-paternity-fraud-case

Fhemmmy:
Dont have the time yet to read it, just got home and need to spend family time and update my auto threadsand tech market. ...Lol

No wahala bro...more grease to the elbow....

Read up on paternity fraud cases

It happens in your neck of the woods too

Fhemmmy:
Chairman, read me well.....

I been reading u wella..Big bro

Statements like I gave u a kid, my body etc are manifestations of such

Is the sex pleasurable to one person only?

Is the child the responsibility of one person only?

Debosky.calm down na


Theo....no need to discuss him
All that can be said has been said

No need to rehash

uzolexis:
it's not about marriage, she asked him if he loves her and he couldn't answer. that's what i'm refering to.

Ok.


Good point

However note that a lot of guys trip there too

Implicit in your posts is that by having a child for a man
A woman did It for him hence her quest to be compensated for giving him a child is justified

The child is not hers but the man's.



Cc: Fhemmmy

Fhemmmy:
Teach them too to know more about what is happening around them and for the boy to have a heart and don't see woman as a object

Women r d greatest culprits here
They see themselves as objects

Fhemmmy:
Did the woman lied that the man was the father till DNA show otherwise?

There's a link on the early pages

Paternity fraud

ladygogo:
Its not about the dollars signs but about being on the same wave length. I dont see money here.

Do men use this wavelength to choose

Are d sexes not equal again