₦airaland Forum

Who has nysc certificate helped?

While walking down the street one day a presidential candidate was tragically hit by a car and died. Her soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance. “Welcome to heaven,” says St. Peter. “Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we’re not sure what to do with you.” “No problem, just let me in,” says the politician. “Well, I’d like to, but I have orders from the higher ups. What we’ll do is have you spend one day in hell and one day in heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity.” “Really?, I’ve made up my mind. I want to be in heaven,” says the politician. “I’m sorry, but we have our rules.” And with that, St. Peter escorts her to the elevator and she goes down, down, down to hell. The doors open and she finds herself in the middle of a green golf course. In the distance is a clubhouse and standing in front of it are all her friends and other politicians who had worked with her. Everyone is very happy and in an evening dress. They run to greet her, shake her hand, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people . They then dined on lobster, caviar and the finest champagne. Also present is the devil, who really is a very friendly guy who is having a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are all having such a good time that before the politician realizes it, it is time to go. Everyone gives her a hearty farewell and waves while the elevator rises. The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens in heaven where St. Peter is waiting for her, “Now it’s time to visit heaven…” So, 24 hours passed with the politician joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before she realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns. “Well, then, you’ve spent a day in hell and another in heaven. Now choose your eternity.” The politician reflects for a minute, then she answers: “Well, I would never have said it before, I mean heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in hell.” So St. Peter escorts her to the elevator and she goes down, down, down to hell… Now the doors of the elevator open and she’s in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. She sees all her friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags as more trash falls to the ground. The devil comes over to her and puts his arm around her shoulders. “I don’t understand,” stammers the politician. “Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and clubhouse, and we ate lobster and caviar, drank champagne, and danced and had a great time. Now there’s just a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable. What happened?” The devil smiles at her and says, “Yesterday we were campaigning, Today, you voted.”

Hull city 2 vs Arsenal fc 0

Enemies of progress... If they don't copy India film story lines they nak.ed themselves and expect to win award with these. The only award they can win is piracy and nak.ed awards. Ghana films suck!!!!

chelsea 2 vs stroke 1 Quote after match!!!

This is very interesting!!! Ikorodu utd vs Kano pillars. scores please...

Wonderful

They started killing themselves!!! Nawa.

Fix game 1000% sure 50odd Nigeria vs fulani herdsmen 2\2 Code 2581

This means WAR!!!

Location: Gombe, Adamawa and Borno!!! This is a military job!!!!

RANGO

He can say that to his Tiv people the rat eaters, we the honorable people of Idoma don't eat Rats!!!

@Op, leave that thing songs don't determine ones faith. My pastor has Sonko, runtown, and 69missed call among others on his playlist! Op next time you would have checked her Videos to see if there were Mojo.

honortee:
I don't believe d story that d Lagos state government did not give a notice of deadline for vacation from the market before the government embarked on this demolition. We should be reasonable in drawing conclusions. How will a Democratic government just wake up one day n just decides to sink d means of livelihood of d people that it's governing.

Yea you are right!!! How would a democratic government refused to free suspects that were granted bail by competent courts!!!

And all these years, i'm just getting to know this now!!!

Having sex with a prostitute has various advantages. The most important advantage for a customer and the prostitute is, that both get XP from this action. That is because a prostitute is a professional Lady (or man) and the customer can learn something from her, but she also learns something from every job well done. To get these XP, the customer has to have an orgasm, so there is some time involved. However, the same customer can give/gain XP with the same prostitute only about 8 times a day. This can be done in about an hour and the XP gain should be roughly comparable with what other occupations can earn during that time. However, if the prostitute is an NPC, there is no XP reward. Only two PCs together can earn these XP. There are also special magical cloths that a prostitute can wear and which increases the XP gained. On the other hand, a PC prostitute may as well find an NPC customer. These Johns hang out in the same location where NPC prostitutes can be found. A prostitute who stands next to him can be hired by these NPC customers. She can then lead the NPC to a safe place, have sex, make some money a a little XP from him. Beware that the same NPC can only be used once for this purpose and disappears shortly after sex, probably home to his wife. If the prostitute is not working on her own but rather for a love-vendor , the XP gain is even greater. For a customer it is therefore advisable to search prostitutes which work for a love-vendor, either in a bar or on a street but for a prostitute there is also advantage in working for one. Having sex with a prostitute also lowers the morality of both the prostitute and the customer.

Prostitutes are better because... Prostitutes don't say "I can't. I have a boyfriend." Prostitutes don't say "No thanks. I didn't think we clicked." Prostitutes don't say "You're not my type." Prostitutes don't say "I think you're too old." Prostitutes say "Do you want to get together? Do you want me to come over?" Prostitutes don't care if you're unemployed or if you have an unimpressive or low-paying job. Prostitutes don't care if you drive an old or inexpensive car. Prostitutes don't care if you're not handsome or if you're short or overweight. Prostitutes don't care if you're not a good conversationalist. Prostitutes don't care if you are married. Prostitutes don't care if you have been divorced three times or six times or if you have children by several ex- wives or ex-girlfriends. Unless you are young, rich, tall, and handsome, you can probably have sex with prostitutes who are much younger and prettier than anyone you could date or marry. More than is true of most women, if you are nice to a prostitute, she'll be nice to you. In an ideal world, all women would be as affectionate and accommodating as prostitutes are. But this isn't an ideal world. Sex with prostitutes tends to prevent you from being too dependent, sexually or emotionally, on other women.

Oloshos are reliable, dependable and Loyal!!! At your service anytime and anywhere, most importantly they give you anyhow you want it!!! Conclusively, Op go and die!!!

evolg:
First issue: He bought a car without ur knowledge, it must have skipped his mind. Sorry!
Second issue: U dint get a new year msg frm him, probably network issues.
Moral of story: Ur nt jst dt important like you think.

OVER!!!

Clerverly:
Eyaa! Just 600...But they need at least 170 Millions Nigerian Signatures, before they will be taken Seriously..

Bunch Of Idiotuus!

Young man calm down!!! Don't worry if they can 600 signatories in less than 48 hours that means In one week Buhari will be kicked Out of the Rock.

Don Jazzy is fighting for Rekaado Banks. Olamide is fighting for lil Kesh Nobody is fighting for Kiss Daniel ,guy you no get boss? * * * * Me sef wonder oooooo. G worldwide, all shades of Bleep up. Lwkmd

My New Year Resolution!!! 1 Find a wife. 2. Get more sleep. 3. Start a Savings Account and a Get a Better Job. 4. Reconnect with an Old Friend 5. . Get ‘er Done (Stop Procrastinating). 6. Learn a Language. 7.Establish a Budget. 8.Be More Adventurous (Take More Chances). 9. Learn to Paint. 10. Worry Less. 11. Go to More Sporting Events. 12. Backup My Computer. 13. Meet Someone New Every Day. 14. Live Within My Means. 15. Stop Worrying What People Think of Me. 16. Stop Being Lazy. 17. Meet a Celebrity. 18. Be Comfortable In My Own Skin. 19. Stop Overthinking. 20. Start a Hobby. 21. Finally Stop Calling My Ex. 22. Start Believing In Myself. 23. Go to Church More. 24. Spend Less Time Online. 25. Become an Expert At Something.

bigfrancis21:
The OP made a great point. I think he/she meant to let readers know in advance that he/she isn't Igbo though the post may sound pro-Igbo.

However, I think the title could be modified to something better such as The Travails of the Igbo - by an Urhobo Writer. It surely sounds better. Anyone reading the thread's title would initially assume it is one of those aggressive anti-Igbo posts by certain people from the Niger Delta about how other Nigerians tag them as Igbo and how they are not Igbo but a, b or c etc. For me, that's what I had initially thought when I first read the title of the thread.

cc Pigin1, modify your thread title accordingly.

Thanks!!!

However, as a student of history,
I wish to show
just what these great people
came/come against
and yet thrive.
Okay, the incessant killings in the
North will be
glossed over so as to make this
article not
overly long. The civil war will also
not be
discussed.
However, post civil war, as I
explained in my post
MINORITY REPORT: THE SYSTEM IS
RIGGED
AGAINST YOU, the rich in Nigeria
have major
roots in the Indegenization
decree of 1972 and
1977. I reminded how the banks
gave people of
other tribes, predominantly
Hausas and Yorubas
loans to buy up companies owned
by foreigners.
Now imagine the Federal
government forced
Chevron to sell 51 percent of its
shares and that
Access Bank will give you loans to
buy the
shares. How rich will you be in a
year? 5 Years?
That is how many Yorubas and
Hausas got to
own UAC, all those Dunlop,
Leventis, Cadbury
etc.
Now while this was ongoing,
Gowon told the
Nigerian banks to give twenty
naira to any Igbo
man that had money in the bank
before the war.
That is, if you had 5 naira before
the war, you
will be given the 5 naira. But if
you had a
hundred naira, you get just
twenty naira in full
fulfilment of the banks duty to
give you your
money.
Ask yourselves “why would the
banks give Igbos
only twenty naira? Did the banks
collapse? So
why pay less than you were
given?
So while the banks were giving
loans to Hausa
and Yorubas to buy Oyibo
companies they did
not build, Igbos were being
cheated out of their
rightful moneys.
Now not also that these people
lost Houses and
business across the land. It is safe
to say that
as at 1970/71. the richest Igbo
had 20 naira that
may be the equivalent of maybe
one million.
Let us look at how Dangote made
his money. He
Dagote (a great man and pride to
Nigeria) has an
uncle called Dantata who owned
huge chunks of
the groundnut pyramids of the
50’s and 60’s. He
gave Dangte a loan and Dangote
paid it back in
record time. CLAP CLAP. The add
is that
Dangote has had his “brothers” in
government,
from IBB to Abacha and
Abdulsalaam. When they
now agreed to democracy, he was
rich enough
to have funded Obasanjo and so
government
policies, be it monopoly afforded
him for rice,
sugar, flour and of course a large
share of
subsidy etc to ensure he is the
wealthiest
Nigerian. (note many had same
opportunity but
did not use it. We kowtow to
Dangote’s
investment capabilities)
However, for the Igbo man,
where will he see an
uncle that will loan him money?
The richest man
in their family has how much as
at then? So
while Fani Kayode can inherit
property of his
father and grandfather and great
grand father, a
Chidi cannot inherit anything from
his
grandfather who had business in
Kano or even
Port Harcourt. Neighbours have
made his dad’s
storey building theirs, and even
someone as
educated as Saro Wiwa lived in an
Igbo war
emigrant house as his. (a sore
point of the Niger
Delta and Igbo Unity). WAEC
building was
Ojukwu’s dad’s building and like
that building,
thousands and the land with
it….lands worth
billions today were taken from
Igbos and each
and every Igbo had tops 20 naira,
destroyed
homeland, stolen and destroyed
wealth away
from the east. ALso his brother is
never
president that will give him oil
block or fuel
lifting. Of 33 oil lifters, only one
Igbo man and
because he was in Obasanjo’s
good graces. Do
we talk of how Igbo civil servants
were displaced
in the federal civil service even
after 3Rs were
declared after the war?
YET LOOK HOW PROUD THEY
STAND TODAY!!!
Look what they have achieved for
themselves….FIRST GENERATION
WEALTH…top
second generation. From being
unable to send
their first sons to school so he
could help look
after the shop, to producing first
class brains in
all departments of modern
learning.
So today, as you accuse Igbos of
wanting their
Biafra or of Baby Factory, or
liking money and
ready to do anything for money,
remember that
just forty years ago, while the
banks were
dashing your uncles loans to buy
all the
companies of Nigeria, it stole
from the Igbos.
Know that appointments have not
favoured them.
Note that they remain persecuted
and many
speak such ill and hate towards a
people forced
by need to survive to be extra-
aggressive
towards their sustenance. Maybe
if you took their
history into consideration, you
will not be so
critical of them, but instead say
“what a resilient
people” and give God the glory
that FOR NOW,
we and such a great people are
compatriots. from blessed kc

Instead of her to marry a guy her bothers can beat!! She went and get married to a guy that can beat all her family!!!

This people are cultists , Buhari please probe them!!!

Normality:
does Ijebu marry egba?

They are not agitating for a country.

Anambra can't marry Imo n co but they want to be one country ODIEGWU

wasak:
I was arguin with a foool on a thread d other day, he had the shamelessness to say Igalas aren't tribalistic, initially they were fytn Yorubas whn they thought Faleke would be made d govnor, but now, they have turned to d Igbiras, organizing meaningless protests. It is not only pitiful, it is shameless and digusting, what if Audu had died in power? What would they have done? Burn down the state or what? I can't fathom how shallow some persons can be. As it is Faleke should go to court and seek Judicial interpretation, that's d way to go.
Perhaps the most absurd thing to note is that the masses who may never benefit from all these brouhaha are d ones displaying such high calibre shortsightedness.
Regrettably disgusting. *spits*

Good one there!!! I'm igala by tribe but dislike the ways my people are behaving with this their rule at all cost mentality!! Give the mandate to other tribes and watch kogi state develop, our igala people have ruled since the creation of the state no single development. In same local govt with the idiotic Wada, erosion has taken over our land, no light, no road, no employment. Faleke please go to court and over turn their mandate, we know you will spend only 4years at the lugard house it is better than none. I know if Apc projects an ebira man and pdp projects an okun man as their candidate comes 2019 and kowa projects one slowpoke igala man, my people will vote for kowa. Faleke come to our aid before erosion push us to the wilderness.

Race to Replace Audu: Igala APC Leaders Nominate Audu’s Son as APC Gov Candidate Leaders of All Progressives Congress (APC), in Kogi East Senatorial District has nominated Mr Mohammed, 43, first son of Late Prince Abubakar Audu, to replace him as the party’ s governorship candidate. The leaders, stakeholders and delegates who made this known in Lokoja on Thursday after a marathon meeting, said they arrived at the decision after due consultations . Their spokesman, Mr Daniel Isah, the Vice Chairman of APC in Kogi East, said they have resolved and are determined to back Mohammed to replace his father if the National Working Committee orders fresh primaries. Isah thanked the Independent National Electoral Commission and the national leadership of the party for the opportunity given to them to find a replacement for Audu who died on Nov. 23 at Ogbonicha, Ofu Local Government. He appealed to the national leadership of the party to give their decision utmost consideration and approval in the overall interest of the party and the state. Present at the meeting were Alhaji Lincho Ocheje, Hon. Hassan Omale, Hon. Benjamin Ikhani, and Sen. Emmanuel Dangana, among others. Credits: Vanguard Newspapers

Sanchase:
22 Idiots for one position ok o. make una continue to waste public funds.

Your father is also an 1diot too. the thunder that will fire any mod that will ban me without banning this idiot is still doing press up.