I come from a very strict background.
I grew up in fear, submission and obedience to my parents, elders and relatives. I am well mannered. I have anger and temper issues but it never goes beyond sulking and crying silently to get it off my chest. I find it difficult to let go when aggravated but in trcent times, i have worked on myself so much that i channel my displeasure to free tears flowing down my cheeks after which i let go of everything.

I am always looking for excuses to run away from any form of marriage discussion whenever its comes to that, i don't give room to premarital sex. I don't know how to overcome this. When my potential suitor seems so nice and with good disposition and everything worth craving for , then i ask myself " who are these people that end up enemies suddenly and what on earth can cause someone to become so horrible that a once lovely marriage turns into chaos "

Honestly, i believe that with my tolerance level that i can manage a home and marriage but then,how can you tell that of your potential partner?

Sometimes, i just want to remain like this and grow old and still be very happy but then societal and family pressure to get married and have your own kids keeps getting higher which results to my running away more and more. To make it worse, i don't keep friends.
Who knows how to overcome this and how can it be ok?

OP. Let's do daddy and mommy. We'll be alright...

Marriage is supposed to be fun and loving. Cast your mind on its positive aspects though not ignoring the challenges. Things will work out fine. Cheers!

The problem is your psyche,mental outlook on life, perceptions, perspectives and too much noise in your head.

To tackle this to it's root needs overhaul in your outlook,views,beliefs, perspectives,perceptions and assumptions


You're creating problems that don't exist in your mind. Declutter your soul and purge yourself of yourself.

No one can give you the best marriage advice. Even the marriage counselors have one issue or the other with their marriages while some are even divorced. No body is perfect. The best advice I can give you is to pray and ask God for direction and guidance. He should give you someone he has prepared for you even before you came into the world from your mum's womb. We can only advise based on our perceptions, look of things and what we have passed through. We are not from the future, if others are, I am not. My challenge and how I overcame won't be the same as the challenge you will face and the technique you will employ to over come it. Remember, the worst mistake one will make is marrying who wasn't meant for you. So PRAY TO GOD AND SEEK HIS WILL AND DIRECTIONS. Don't take decisions based on what people will say. At the end of it all, it is you and your home. They won't be there for you incase there's turbulence. Best of Luck.

Marry me and all your worries will be history.

Majority of us are.

You did not say if you are a man or a woman.....
But marriage is a beautiful thing to look forward to. You upbringing no doubt affected your psychic and mental state of mind...forget the well mannered and obedient stuffs you said here, your parents never allowed you to mix up perhaps that would have given you an avenue to watch n see many behaviour of people.

Perhaps you were an introvert who they kept indoors, thinking that will make you a better person and give them a good name as better mama and papa dem.

@Op, explore the world,mix up with people, make friends and ask couples how they see marriage. E no work for uche no mean e no go work for you...as you make your bed so you lay on it....get a close friend and build up from there.
Above all, embress marital life n ask God to bless your union and home!

9ja girls are out to add more burden to your life instead of softening it.

In mosdii voice: They are all useless..... All of them!

I know someone will come and accuse an innocent spiritual husband

Damn Niggar!!!!!
Work hard & smart then you’ll be comfortable with marriage and also find peace of mind in your wife

OP,When it comes to Marriage I think you should just know what you're getting into with regards to extended families.But like you mentioned It is more about who you marry than what you can do to keep a marriage happy. If you marry a kind and considerate person who you genuinely enjoy being with and admire, your marriage has a much higher chance of lasting.There's no need rushing into marriage as many who did rushed out. Still take your time to chose wisely,It Is Better Late Than Never But Never Too Late Is Better.

Well just make sure that you find the soul mate that will be compatible with you, you know the woman or man you choose in your life determine the success and failure you face in life.. trust me.

I understand you, just know what you want and don't be too careful too, I can mislead you. Don't sell yourself for any man. Pray to God to give you your heart desires, go for counseling, read relationship books, watch relationship tips on Facebook too. You shall never get married to the wrong hand.

Marriage is scary these days, take a look at the young men we have around, its easier for the camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is to finding good and worthy husband.

Rozcol:
Marriage is scary these days, take a look at the young men we have around, its easier for the camel to pass through a niddle than it is to finding good and worthy husband.

Lol.. calm down

dairykidd:
Lol.. calm down

Lol,how are you doing

Marriage in 2022 will be solely on renewable contract.
This I have seen

Rozcol:
Lol,how are you doing

I'm good just at the airport now to pick my old boy. How u been?

Rozcol:
Marriage is scary these days, take a look at the young men we have around, its easier for the camel to pass through the eye of a needle than it is to finding good and worthy husband.

It is Easier for A Camel to pass through the Eye of a Needle that it will be For You to Get Married.

See you in Shiloh 2035

Deactivate your NL account or stop visiting romance section

dairykidd:

I'm good just at the airport now to pick my old boy. How u been?

I'm fine, my regards to your old boy lol

Don't worry OP, only age will get the fear out of you..lets wait till your 32 nd know if you still have fear

Make more friends first.
As you handle your friendship, that's how marriage works.
It's not bliss all the time but you should enjoy it most of the time

Dont get married!!!!!

Do whatever makes you happy my dear.

After being counselled and talked to but you're still scared of marriage and don't want to to get married? Please don't so. It is not a do or die issue as some people are married but unhappy. Society puts pressure on people too much in Nigeria (which I am sure of).

Due to personal encounters with several women who had severe issues and died, I developed severe Tokophobia (make una check google ) and no matter the pressure do not see myself wanting to go down that path when married - Gestational surrogacy is the plan and I am hoping and praying for a man who would understand this.

You see this life ehn, na how you do am you go enjoy am. Do only what makes you happy without thinking of these negative shallow minded people. They judge others without hearing their story, they act like saints but are devils inside.

I no kukuma send anybody

Grow up

Marriage is crap trust me

Hmmm

It's not a must you get married so why are you entertaining unnecessary fear? Marriage is meant to be enjoyed not a scary adventure. But if you wish to go into it with your current condition, then wait till you have all maturities (physical, emotional, spiritual and financial) required before venturing into it, by then your fear would have gone.

Q