DWJOBScom:


it's tough when they have settled to ask them to leave the house - trust me.

It's best right now before it becomes tough. I have seen brothers reluctant to leave a house they were squatting o pending the return of the owner.

It's best they go back to the rented apartment immediately

Return to the rented apartment and leave the brand new house to be inhabited by rats, cockroaches, lizards and flies? Which one is better? After some time you will hear that ghosts are seen on the walls.

DWJOBScom:
Treat it immediately

Let them know you intend staying in that house alone.

That they need to move back to their apartment or find another

noooooo

if you not married , you will need to marry and live with your wife alone without your parents (that shit is not funny at all)

if you are married , your family needs that privacy without a debate.

Please ask them to leave the house!

May your own children be a curse to you for your comment.

You will never enjoy any blessings from any of your children. Your children will be wealthy buth will NEVER bless you.

op, allow your parents stay in that house and God will favor you with financial breakthrough and you will have enough to build a much bigger house IJN, Ameeen.
This I've seen.

Trojan8:


Well that's the focus of the entire post.

Yea I was agreeing with you.

Iyajelili:
I hate people who seek advice on something clearer than water.

Firstly, as the wife, I'm done contributing to any project with my husband. I'll only carry out my personal projects without even his knowledge.

Secondly, as the husband, since my parents as taken the house with force as a compensation for "raising and taking care of me", I don't owe them anything anymore. Also, if the house is still uncompleted, they'll have to complete it on their own or live in it like that.

My advice to any serious bachelor on nairaland, listen to nairaland guys advice at your own peril.

What can one say about this? But, you should be fair, the situation is not clear - the parents have put spanners in the works. Couples are supposed to be partners and that works mostly fine abroad but Nja mentality can spoil this sort of partnership.

It does not do a relationship and children any good if husband and wife do not truly cooperate and maximise their resources.

andyanders:
May your own children be a curse to you for your comment.

You will never enjoy any blessings from any of your children. Your children will be wealthy buth will NEVER bless you.

op, allow your parents stay in that house and God will favor you with financial breakthrough and you will have enough to build a much bigger house IJN, Ameeen.
This I've seen.

How can someone end with Jesus name and then cursed just because someone has a different opinion or attitude. You are not a Christian!

alpontif:


You are even more daft than I assumed before. Seeking Social Validation is an essential part of any sane Human being, without that there won't be something called the Maslow's hierarchy of needs.... Psychologists know this, social scientists know this, philosophers know this, any well informed person knows this, anyone with half a brain knows this.... Therefore posing that concept as if its a flaw shows the deep gaps in your thought process.

Dude, seriously, I don't engage people like you. I am sure you don't even understand meaning of social validation.

You keep throwing "Maslow Hierarchy of Needs" around. It seems na the only thing you learn for your year 1?

alpontif:

From the nonsense you have been vomiting, I can only wish you go back to school and pay attention this time, OR develop a habit of reading, so that you can better understand the sociology of human societies, why people behave the way they do, what different societies expect and how to understand societal values and understanding how to work with them for harmony in the society.

Don't beat above your weight dude. Stick to discovering yourself.

alpontif:


There is a path to harmony, and there is another to division. The wise knows the path to pursue, I just hope readers don't get influenced by the deeply insane views you hold that can only lead to division in the African society.

I won't call it messiah complex. But whatever complex you are suffering from requires urgent help.

alpontif:

Eat your humble pie and open your brain to get wisdom.. E go pay you.

From someone still struggling to define himself or some relying on social pressure to define his priorities.

My small encounter with you shows you have low self esteem.

I am done with you.

We rise!!!

chrisj2:


What can one say about this? But, you should be fair, the situation is not clear - the parents have put spanners in the works. Couples are supposed to be partners and that works mostly fine abroad but Nja mentality can spoil this sort of partnership.

It does not do a relationship and children any good if husband and wife do not truly cooperate and maximise their resources.

She cooperated to maximize their resources and what did she get from that? As African especially a Nigerian wife she dare not speak or get angry else she'd be tag a wicked wife. So I'll stand by my opinion.

neyobills:


Oh so u have no problems staying in a family house so why chastise an aged couple who decides to stay in their sons house that can also be rightly called a family house

No one is assuming anything but you,let’s just say the house isn’t his for real even though he stated otherwise how does it hurt the investor that his parents decide to stay in a not to completed house,he didn’t say it was a finished and tastefully furnished apartment,how will his parents investing their rent money on the property affect the returns on his investment maybe you should give us your economical blueprint how this will affect the investor.

Lastly you are making plans for retirement and I hope the come true for you and mine as well but until that happens it’s still wishful thinking,I’m sure those parents had their retirement plans too,bringing it to fruition is another kettle of fish and we need Gods grace as well to make it happen,perhaps their retirement plan was sending their kid to school,their kid their choice,u have no right to chastise their choice of investment if u haven’t fed them before.

All this black people self hating crew self,where did u conduct your statistics that black people leave very inheritance behind,in saner climes no one cares much about an older folks inheritance when there is social security and safety net,abundance of jobs and opportunities,I’m sure you must have heard white people given up estate inheritances to their pets and no one raises the roof over there,how many black people have given their inheritance to cats?

You had better jolt yourself back into reality with this story so we won’t be using u as an example too someday,hustle harder and pray for Gods as well,remember the ice says it’s solid too until u put some heat on it.

Just Google Inheritance amongst blacks... Who said all white people behave one way or the other and a lot of blacks not leaving inheritance does not mean every single one of them.

I know how much better live has been for the last few generations compared to the current one - they have more disadvantages than my generation or my parents. If they do well that is all the blessing I need; the rest is a bonus.

Family house means my parents do not need my money or me to build them a house for them. I can build one but I do not do waste or ego...

A parents retirement plan is having a child - that says a lot about your mentality!

Iyajelili:

She cooperated to maximize their resources and what did she get from that? As African especially a Nigerian wife she dare not speak or get angry else she'd be tag a wicked wife. So I'll stand by my opinion.

I can understand what you are saying and where you are coming from... It is just my wish that we shed our mental slavery and how so called culture and traditions; some are really backward and hurt us as people.

The parents and many of the contributors here are the problem but they think they righteous and know what is good for others. Closed minds!

Nigerians y'all are wicked people... with a useless sense of entitlement

See somebody's sweat , with his wife's sweat in it and then the parents move in without consent and y'all are here saying trash..

If you come at me with the "after all they have don for him card "

IL tell you this... No one forced any parent to give birth to a child, as a parent you know once you are bringing in kids it's your responsibility to cater for them and provide for them....

Stop holding it over the kids head and expecting payback or feeling entitled ..

Nobody force u born pikin, leave the children to cater for their own family tf!

This kind of thing can cause friction in a once happy marriage.....

But y'all don't use your brains in Africa.....
From the comments I see here, most of you are capable of doing same to your children , which is evil and inhumane.

chrisj2:


Just Google Inheritance amongst blacks... Who said all white people behave one way or the other and a lot of blacks not leaving inheritance does not mean every single one of them.

I know how much better live has been for the last few generations compared to the current one - they have more disadvantages than my generation or my parents. If they do well that is all the blessing I need; the rest is a bonus.

Family house means my parents do not need my money or me to build them a house for them. I can build one but I do not do waste or ego...

A parents retirement plan is having a child - that says a lot about your mentality!

You said it all fam, that mentality amongst Africans suck.... And I see most of the so called parents here rolling that part in years to come...

No child owes their parent anything , talmbout after all they have done for the child??....
They knew wat they were getting into bringing kids into this world....

Africans and slavery

Kehindeaj78:
I live outside the country but I entrusted my house development with my parents in Nigeria, but they leave in a rented apartment. They're are due for new rent payment at their rented apartment which i sent them the money, only for them to call me that they don't want to rent another apartment again and have moved into my ongoing house and used the money to do somethings in the ongoinghouse. What do I do?

Oga wen ure ready hire me to build a state of the art place for u...
The house is gone except all ur siblings have their own houses

OfficialAPCNig:

Dude, seriously, I don't engage people like you. I am sure you don't even understand meaning of social validation.

You keep throwing "Maslow Hierarchy of Needs" around. It seems na the only thing you learn for your year 1?





Don't beat above your weight dude. Stick to discovering yourself.

I won't call it messiah complex. But whatever complex you are suffering from requires urgent help.


From someone still struggling to define himself or some relying on social pressure to define his priorities.

My small encounter with you shows you have low self esteem.

I am done with you.

We rise!!!

This boy, you have serious problems... Frankly speaking... Jokes aside.

There is something we call psychological projection... Its a condition where the afflicted like you projects his own character and behavioural flaws onto someone else in order to gain something (even emotionaly)..

I kid you not, that's actually how psychologists define it.

Na you know say I dey seek social validation, na still same you know say I dey arrogant ... It is still you that knows I have low self esteem, same you says I have a messiah complex(you don't even understand what it means) ...

If we fit the above into this concept of psychological projection, we can only conclude that you are arrogant, have low self esteem, seek validation and have a complex...

You are merely describing yourself, which is why I suggest you should seek help.

Make you no wake up one day just run mental...

Pẹ̀lẹ́ my dear...

DWJOBScom:
Treat it immediately

Let them know you intend staying in that house alone.

That they need to move back to their apartment or find another

noooooo

if you not married , you will need to marry and live with your wife alone without your parents (that shit is not funny at all)

if you are married , your family needs that privacy without a debate.

Please ask them to leave the house!

You sound too Igbo.

andyanders:
May your own children be a curse to you for your comment.

You will never enjoy any blessings from any of your children. Your children will be wealthy buth will NEVER bless you.

op, allow your parents stay in that house and God will favor you with financial breakthrough and you will have enough to build a much bigger house IJN, Ameeen.
This I've seen.

God bless you!

Kehindeaj78:
I live outside the country but I entrusted my house development with my parents in Nigeria, but they leave in a rented apartment. They're are due for new rent payment at their rented apartment which i sent them the money, only for them to call me that they don't want to rent another apartment again and have moved into my ongoing house and used the money to do somethings in the ongoinghouse.
What do I do?

What do you do? Really? For your own parents that struggled to nurture you Did you get their consent before living in their own house from your childhood to adulthood? Dear God please don't give a child that has a mind like this.

RedEnergy:
What do you do? Really? For your own parents that struggled to nurture you Did you get their consent before living in their own house from your childhood to adulthood? Dear God please don't give a child that has a mind like this.

If you channel this energy intro praying for yourself to build many houses, trust me, your prayer points over your children will be less. In fact, your children will pray for you more.

DWJOBScom:


God bless you!

Ameen, and He shall bless you too. Your children shall be a blessing to you.

Some of you are actually planing to dump your responsibilities on your children under the guise that the economy is bad. Lol. This was the same thing some parents did when cement was N200. Today, cement is N2800 and you're already concerned about raising kids that will build for you at a time a bag of cement will be sold for N50,000. Wouldn't it be better to just assume that the global economy may never get better and do your best today to make life easier tomorrow?? It's good to pray for your kids to be successful but it's better when your kids appreciate you for leaving so much for them.

Thanksgiving & Appreciation >>>>>>>> Prayer of necessities and petition.

Joshcoli:


I'm talking as a father now

I know the enourmous sacrifice I'm currently sacrificing to make sure my kids get a better life even sacrificing my own dreams and aspirations. What is a house?

My father started using one of my cars so I left it for him. Today he's late and that is the only thing he enjoyed from his son I wished I could do more

When they die you will use the money of building another house to celebrate their burial.

He even helped you to developed your house with the money you sent to him for rent and you're complaining about the house

I pray parent don't be at the mercies of their children to survive.

I don't agree with the emboldened. If that dream was worth the investment, you wouldn't sacrifice it.

Imagine Buhari sacrificing his presidential ambition so Yusuf could go to school? Can Yusuf's education ever get him the kind of luxury and life he presently lives under his father??

Perceived Return on Investment is why people use that line. If I'm sure that investing a million naira on myself will make the life of my children or generation much better, I would spend that money on myself (even if it means kicking my offsprings out of school).

Perceived Return on Investment is why people make that "sacrifice", and nothing more.

To add to the above, please don't go and tell your kids tomorrow how you nearly became a governor o but changed your mind because you needed to pay school fees. Dem fit curse you

Acidosis:


If you channel this energy intro praying for yourself to build many houses, trust me, your prayer points over your children will be less. In fact, your children will pray for you more.

I'm not praying for children to build me houses. I will build enough for them, just like my own father will do for me, like his own father did for him. I'm praying that God should never give me an ungrateful child that has to come to social media to seek public opinion about how he should treat the parents that raised him

alpontif:



This boy, you have serious problems... Frankly speaking... Jokes aside.

There is something we call psychological projection... Its a condition where the afflicted like you projects his own character and behavioural flaws onto someone else in order to gain something (even emotionaly)..

I kid you not, that's actually how psychologists define it.

You have been unnecessarily showing off you studied sociology in just few exchanges with you.

You have a deep-lying insecurity. Go sort it out and don't bring it to my table.

Like I said, I don't engage people like you. This show off is a reckless pursuit of social validation. I don't know who you want to impress with your book knowledge.

alpontif:


Na you know say I dey seek social validation, na still same you know say I dey arrogant ... It is still you that knows I have low self esteem, same you says I have a messiah complex(you don't even understand what it means) ...

If we fit the above into this concept of psychological projection, we can only conclude that you are arrogant, have low self esteem, seek validation and have a complex...

Exactly what am I saying. You just described yourself by projecting your flaws on another.

alpontif:


You are merely describing yourself, which is why I suggest you should seek help.

Make you no wake up one day just run mental...

Pẹ̀lẹ́ my dear...

But seriously dude, you need help.

Kehindeaj78:
I live outside the country but I entrusted my house development with my parents in Nigeria, but they leave in a rented apartment. They're are due for new rent payment at their rented apartment which i sent them the money, only for them to call me that they don't want to rent another apartment again and have moved into my ongoing house and used the money to do somethings in the ongoinghouse. What do I do?

We can't advise you against the wishes of your parents. It's a family issue. God will provide you with money to build another one. It ain't nice seeing your parents in a rented apartment.

middlebelter:


It appeaars your wife is not comfortable with the development from the tune of your complaint. However, you need to realize as an African man, you have a responsibility to protect your parents as well as your wife. The ability to strike a balance is what makes a respnsible man. Now that your situation is like this, join hands to build another house for your in-law with your wife for the sake of peace. You also need to explain to your wife that you didn't envisage this development.

Handle with wisdom and humility. God will help you.

Did you give him money to build another one?

Graciafun:



We can't advise you against the wishes of your parents. It's a family issue. God will provide you with money to build another one. It ain't nice seeing your parents in a rented apartment.

What's wrong with a rented apartment? Why shouldn't he go against his parents wishes to protect his own nuclear family

GofuckYourself:
As you judged your parents so will you be judged but more severely. As you belittle them with this ridiculous attention seeking post so will you be belittled but more severely. As you think evil thoughts spurred by pride and arrogance towards they who cared for you when you were vulnerable so will you be disregarded and tossed aside even worse when your time comes .

It is not me who curses you with this but your very own deeds and thoughts, for the laws of karma are absolute. You have laid a terrible fate for yourself and for all who this ridiculous post influences to think wrongly so will you to chained in the afterlife until they come to recognition of their misdeeds

I wish you strength for what is coming your way

Cheers

Oga, gofuck yourself.

Kehindeaj78:
I live outside the country but I entrusted my house development with my parents in Nigeria, but they leave in a rented apartment. They're are due for new rent payment at their rented apartment which i sent them the money, only for them to call me that they don't want to rent another apartment again and have moved into my ongoing house and used the money to do somethings in the ongoinghouse. What do I do?

I don't see the problem

Afterall you lived rent-free in their apartment all through your childhood

andyanders:
May your own children be a curse to you for your comment.

You will never enjoy any blessings from any of your children. Your children will be wealthy buth will NEVER bless you.

op, allow your parents stay in that house and God will favor you with financial breakthrough and you will have enough to build a much bigger house IJN, Ameeen.
This I've seen.

He's going to be wealthy and bless his children and not need to wait for blessings from his children to enjoy his life. Africans and entitlement mentality. Awon I will eat the fruit of my labour, chasing young children these days into fraud so they can buy a car for their mother and build a house for their father.

chrisj2:


Who are you? Why are you so pained? If the parents abandoned the child that no one forced them to have, then it is on their head!

I have children and they were my choices and I will provide for them like a good parent will do - and I do not want financial considerations from them just because I was the sperm donor...

Stingy greedy fool is someone who pays the rent for the parents and possibly send money to siblings and after all that, they moved into his house without consent. That is a scam! Now crawl back under the rock you came out from. I am not interested in you or your opinion because you have offered none.

Has the OP said to you that he wanted the house to gather dust or use it to flex. It is clearly an investment between himself and his wife and his family. This nonsense could break his relationship and this one is talking nonsense...

Oga bye bye