₦airaland Forum

Ishilove:


This sure brings back memories

Pacesetter2021:
Most girls are very very protective of their father. I have seen your situation play out before.

Yes, you would have helped her get use to her room way before now.

If you are hoping she will grow up and start using that room, I am sorry it won't happen. Even when she is 7.

What I will advise is that during bed time, take her to her room, do what ever routine, story telling, or song singing or cartoon watching then lay with her and tell her to sleep. Act like you are sleeping with her. When she sleep, get up and leave. If she wake up and cry again, take her back to the room, lie with her till she sleeps again.

Continue till she forgets what it's like to sleep on your bed. This may take up to a year but better now than later cos the more you delay the harder it will be.

Please she should not mistakenly see you both doing that pls before she will climb her class mate in school. Abeg, for the sake of her innocent class mates. Thanks

daddytime:
Hmmm...this is a very very tricky one.


1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?

Yes, this is where you guys missed it. She should have been introduced to her room by age 3 at the latest.

2. Is it too late to force her to her room?

Never, it can't be too late. It's time to let her know who's in charge and the boss.
Kids are like "puppies or dogs". They play on your intelligence and patience to an elasticity and should you fall for the " blink-first" game, you'd remain their puppy and always at their mercy.


3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?

Like "NIKE", just do it.
Introduce her to her room, make her understand she's a big girl now and needs to act like one. The best person to implement this should be mummy. The trick should be to spend time with her gisting and telling her stories until she falls asleep. She'd rebel for a while but after a while she'd eventually get used to it.


4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.

She shouldn't be encouraged or given any reason to ask such " adult" questions. However, in a case where you both get careless and she stumbles in on you, if you weren't caught in your "birthday suites" just tell her you and mummy were praying.


5. Is her jealousy normal?

Isn't she a girl? Ask her mummy


Patronize my signature below..

FERNANDEZISBACK:
Let her watch and observe..she is an innocent kid who has no idea whatsoever what you guys are doing..

Let her be comfortable around you guys when intimate... nothing wrong with it...

ImaIma1:
That is the first rule of sleep with kids. Never allow them sleep on the same bed from when they are babies. Never!

I learnt this and my babies go from the hospital to their own beds. I would take the pain to stand up, pick them up and breastfeed. Because getting them to stop sleeping in your bed is one of the hardest things to do.

Just gradually get her to sleep in her bed. It's not easy to start sleeping alone when you have been sleeping with people from birth.

FERNANDEZISBACK:
Let her watch and observe..she is an innocent kid who has no idea whatsoever what you guys are doing..

Let her be comfortable around you guys when intimate... nothing wrong with it...

DonroxyII:
This seems like a Bad Idea. You don't want your kids to be in the creche and be reported to be sleeping on other people's kids because they practice what they see

daddytime:
Hmmm...this is a very very tricky one.


1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?

Yes, this is where you guys missed it. She should have been introduced to her room by age 3 at the latest.

2. Is it too late to force her to her room?

Never, it can't be too late. It's time to let her know who's in charge and the boss.
Kids are like "puppies or dogs". They play on your intelligence and patience to an elasticity and should you fall for the " blink-first" game, you'd remain their puppy and always at their mercy.


3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?

Like "NIKE", just do it.
Introduce her to her room, make her understand she's a big girl now and needs to act like one. The best person to implement this should be mummy. The trick should be to spend time with her gisting and telling her stories until she falls asleep. She'd rebel for a while but after a while she'd eventually get used to it.


4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.

She shouldn't be encouraged or given any reason to ask such " adult" questions. However, in a case where you both get careless and she stumbles in on you, if you weren't caught in your "birthday suites" just tell her you and mummy were praying.


5. Is her jealousy normal?

Isn't she a girl? Ask her mummy


Patronize my signature below..

GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol

I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.


We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)

1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?

2. Is it too late to force her to her room?

3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?

4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.

5. Is her jealousy normal?

Thank you

ozonechrome:
Please don't ever do this.

Even at 1year old. They can remember stuffs.

Hilariousfacto:
Dey there dey form official best dad....I made this kind of mistake with my 3yrs old son when he was just about one year, the rate at which he caught up with everything really amazed me....I had to enforce him sleeping in separate room immediately.... Same with my last baby girl, she's also now used to sleeping separately....all these didn't come easily, nah with thorough beating self...you will be glad you did later.... I ain't gat no time for shit...I can't turn my kids to nympho at an early age all in the name of best dad....I've seen kids at under age three trying to engage in sex....in fact a tenant had to move out of our house cos her girl child was already on the high at age three....bros.....use force bfr things go out of your control

GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol

I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.


We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)

1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?

2. Is it too late to force her to her room?

3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?

4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.

5. Is her jealousy normal?

Thank you

FERNANDEZISBACK:
At 4yrs

Otiv:
God bless your wisdom. I don't think there would be a better response than this

aribisala0:
Mr Ajebutter

Her own room? Is that the Nigerian reality?


Many urban Nigerian families have one room as their entire dwelling and sometimes even two families in one room

Sometimes I see some families in such circumstances and wonder when and where they DO IT

GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol

I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.


We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)

1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?

2. Is it too late to force her to her room?

3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?

4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.

5. Is her jealousy normal?

Thank you

lucro:
You are very brave.

Please a question...

With the beating, aren't you scared your kids may become afraid of you and in the process get disconnected into adulthood?

I love my dad dearly but he was not one to spare the rod. Overtime we got closer to our mum (our defender of the Universe back then) while our relationship with our dad became strained.

For almost two years I did not inflict any form of 'corporal punishment' on my 2 year old, but I noticed that he now exhibits some traits that require correction. I, very recently, started 'spanking' the dude, but noticed that he gets 'uncomfortable' around me whenever I am 'not happy' with him. I am a bit uncomfortable with this.

Doe that happen in your case, and how do you deal with it? I guess this makes it three questions.

Thanks.

ALLNIGERIANSMAD:
imagine how 21st century parent they train child in Africa oh,
Do exactly how your parents did to you till you grow, and stop asking stupid question

HonestFriend:
Try knacking at noon na.. My neighbor has 4kids in one room.. Na afternoon the man dey hammer him wife wen the kids don go school.

luckydion:
you don't pamper a child up to that effect else you succeeded in ruining her future

relocate her to children's room.

no mater the age, don't make love in their presence, those in tender age may not be able to ask like yours did or may be afraid or don't care to ask but the scene creates image in them, definitely, they will act according to it.... then, you might not trace the source.

there was a man in Bosso, opposite FUT Minna Niger State then... living in one room with his wife and many children.... You know what the man his Wife sleep on bed while the children on the floor. according his age daughter who was pregnant the same time her mother took-in said she had sex with her father's colleague who visited in the morning having watch her parents doing it all the night time.

Forumobserver12:
Please don't even try that in the presence of your own 4yrs old child, children of nowadays learn fast....did you read about the question she asked the parents ?

Do you realize that children of about 2years old now knows the difference between a toy phone and real phones?

Stevenbright:
She and her mum should sleep in her room. When you both need to be intimate, your wife will come to your room at night when the little child is fast asleep!

SeriouslySense:
Does not invalidate their own experiences, We don't have to do things the same way, when you call someone an ajebuter, you are already closing the ability to reason differently or you are boxing yourself already.

ThatFairGuy1:
I don't think it's ideal to leave kid at that tender age sleep the hell alone.

What if unexpected happens?
How would you know
I don't take chances

It's better u go to the other room to do your thing when nature calls or you make another beddings for her IN THAT SAME ROOM.

Afterall you should Should turn the light off while you're wrestling

I don't think u do before.

GenderMix:
Dear Esteemed Nairalanders of extreme wisdom, I have a 4+ year old daughter who is very curious and sleeps on the same bed with me and wife. Some days ago she almost caught me and wife having sex, so in the morning she asked my wife what I was doing to her…lol. Most times I hug and kiss my wife in front of her and do same to her (in her case, a peck and she reciprocates back). This is our normal lives. Sometimes, when I hug my wife before her, she gets jealous..lol

I think we made a mistake in not allowing her get used to her room from day one. We had tried to make her see reasons why she can’t continue to sleep on same bed with us but it’s all falling on deaf ears. At a point, we forced her to her room and when she woke up around 2am, all hell was let loose, I felt sympathy and told my wife to allow her into our room.


We can’t continue this way, so I need your advice (especially married couples with kids)

1. Did we make a mistake by letting her sleep on same bed with us considering she is just 4?

2. Is it too late to force her to her room?

3. How do we go about making sure she gets used to her room without disturbing us?

4. If she asks what we are doing at night, like the case where she almost caught us, what would be a good reply that would sound logical and educative for her own growth.

5. Is her jealousy normal?

Thank you

aribisala0:
You need to loosen up and stop taking yoursef so seriously
Ajebutter was a joke. If the joke was lost on you sorry . \let us leave that

\the reality is very few Nigerian children have a room of their own . Fewer than 1 in 1000 Nigerian children have any such experience of having a bedroom. as to make it sound un-Nigerian. If you do not know this you do not know Nigeria