knowingChrist:
This is the most painful things a man can go through. It's the worst of all sins unto another. I really feel your pain bc I know this pain is even unto your soul. Sorry brother and I hope God gives you the strength to do the right thing.

However, since I know there are many kids out here who will advice you off their minds, I'm poised to give you a manly advice.

There's never a reason we love people. Usually love should never be bc of the next person but sadly it's become so in the world we find ourself. People have become selfish in love and this is why we have system of cheating partners.

The emotional thing to do is to send her packing at this instance and keep pictures of her messages as evidence in case you have to go to court but life transcends emotions. In fact, foolishness is to live and make decisions based emotions.

Marriage is a union, it's not a breakable union, that said a man must look not to break his marriage at any point in time. I know this experience will be painful but healing is sweater than any pain. The reason you're who you're is that you might become like God someday, through reasonable decision, patience, understanding, forgiveness and self control.

You need all of this to come into place for you at the moment. I can remember but there's a story in the bible about a man who married a woman and she went harloting. The bible says he went to the whorehouse and picked her up and cleaned her and set her in her place as his wife.

You're that man and that's how God has been picking you up and cleaning you up every time you go on running after money in idolation. Living for money is idolatry before God and almost everyone in our country Nigeria is guilty of this. I believe you have forgive your wife by think of ur kids as you've mentioned. After you've forgiven her, call her and ask her what she wants. Ask her if she wants the marriage or not. Let her know she doesn't deserve ur forgiveness but you're doing it for God and for the poor kids that you've brought into life through her.

Let her know she has to work out her respect back before you. Create standards in the relationship that will hopeful help you guys conquer the fury of gossips and further attacks from this so called Ex. May the good Lord help you brother. God bless you

Davidave:

Pregnant wife letting another man cum inside of her. Dude, she’s a dog, divorce her.
Get DNA test immediately for both kids. Follow up with kicking the dog you are married to out.

Soulflai:
I shouldn't have brought this here but the emotional bargage is too heavy for me to move on in. My marriage of 2 years is about to crumble.

I met my wife in Kaduna Southern part in 2017. Our relationship had been a long distance one as I base in Lagos while she also work in Kaduna, but we eventually married in 2020. The bone of contention is the issue of her ex. That point we are dating, I always caution her to cut communication with the guy, she will do it by deleting the number, but later I will find out they're still relating.

Last month, I purchased a new phone and I had to give her my own. So on the process of reinstalling Whatsapp on her phone, I retrieved all the backup Whatsapp messages 7 which left me devastated. The chat history with her ex really left me broken.

On multiple occasions after I paid her dowry, she met with the guy and they had sex. Multiple times pals! Even after marriage, when she is 5 months pregnant, the guy still had her with my baby inside her!

I am really broken pals, I confronted her on this, she started crying that she will cut communication with him. The guy even send some money to her account on difference time this year.

This is the height of emotional damage. I am just leaving each day just to find my leg financially. I am trying my best, but it is not enough.

Lastly, I called the so-called ex on phone to cut communication with her, the guy is in Kaduna I think while we are in Lagos. She also blocked him all avenues likewise. My decision now is that any time I discovered any form of communication between her and the guy, it is over with the marriage. I think she is not really in to me like that, which beg the question while she married me in first instance.

If am your brother, what advice would you recommend? I only choose to be lenient because the kids are just too small to have their parents separated early. If not, I would have sent her parking!.

Right now I am just not happy with life afterall.

Soulflai:
why calling me an idiot on issue I can't control?That she cheat with me her ex is my fault.I am not saying I will not disolve the marriage anytime soon but I need time and money before doing that
People like you make matters worst.Any way thanks for your input

OreoPaschal:


Where I am from. When a woman is cheating, difficulties are bound to happen to the husband. And when he finds out without approaching her for cleansing which is beyond confession. Worst calamity may likely happen to him, he begins to die slowly.

I will advice you separate from her for now, she should take the kids along. Keep your evidence, and as soon as your financials are fair enough. File for custody of the kids and they should be of age by then. If at all, the first child is truly yours. I can spare anything, but not a cheating wife. In all you do, prioritize your wellbeing, safety and thoughts.

I wish you all the healing you need.

Soulflai:
no, definitely no,am just too broke to cater for my kids alone

Soulflai:
I shouldn't have brought this here but the emotional bargage is too heavy for me to move on in. My marriage of 2 years is about to crumble.

I met my wife in Kaduna Southern part in 2017. Our relationship had been a long distance one as I base in Lagos while she also work in Kaduna, but we eventually married in 2020. The bone of contention is the issue of her ex. That point we are dating, I always caution her to cut communication with the guy, she will do it by deleting the number, but later I will find out they're still relating.

Last month, I purchased a new phone and I had to give her my own. So on the process of reinstalling Whatsapp on her phone, I retrieved all the backup Whatsapp messages 7 which left me devastated. The chat history with her ex really left me broken.

On multiple occasions after I paid her dowry, she met with the guy and they had sex. Multiple times pals! Even after marriage, when she is 5 months pregnant, the guy still had her with my baby inside her!

I am really broken pals, I confronted her on this, she started crying that she will cut communication with him. The guy even send some money to her account on difference time this year.

This is the height of emotional damage. I am just leaving each day just to find my leg financially. I am trying my best, but it is not enough.

Lastly, I called the so-called ex on phone to cut communication with her, the guy is in Kaduna I think while we are in Lagos. She also blocked him all avenues likewise. My decision now is that any time I discovered any form of communication between her and the guy, it is over with the marriage. I think she is not really in to me like that, which beg the question while she married me in first instance.

If am your brother, what advice would you recommend? I only choose to be lenient because the kids are just too small to have their parents separated early. If not, I would have sent her parking!.

Right now I am just not happy with life afterall.

CHoccolaTE:


What about men that are kidnappers and bandits and armed robbers and killers?

Men are the nonsense creatures without conscience, not women.

Ruthymoon:
Forgetting your ex is really not that easy ,cos everybody's got an ex,

emmytams:
Are you sure you are a man at all? They should create another gender for your type. I cannot be sharing my gender with you. ❌❌❌

Vikkoh:
What other advice do you want Bros?

She was pregnant and was still collecting from her EX?
That's the height of it my brother.

You can't cope with someone like that and if you decide to manage the situation hoping she'd change, kindly write down your will and carefully allocate your properties to your Child/Children cos she'll lead you to your grave in years to come.

Dump her sorry a$$ and take care of your children the best way you can.
Forget what the society would say. Your life and sanity matters and you shouldn't joke with that.

Meanwhile, don't listen to the Righteousness guy.
Him go start to dey explain how your story is a sign of end time .

JONSYN7154:
You said you married from southern Kaduna ryt?

What you're going through is not a new thing.

Didn't they tell you that ladies from southern Kaduna flirt a lot even if the Are married?

If you think am lying make your finding.

Righteousness2:
Sorry bro. Really a painful and unfortunate discovery.

You both should Seek Godly counseling from one who is Spiritually matured. Someone you both can Confindently pour out the truth of your home to.

I Pray for you! GOD Almighty Heal you, Heal your Home and Restore your Home in JESUS Name..

Vikkoh:
What other advice do you want Bros?

She was pregnant and was still collecting from her EX?
That's the height of it my brother.

You can't cope with someone like that and if you decide to manage the situation hoping she'd change, kindly write down your will and carefully allocate your properties to your Child/Children cos she'll lead you to your grave in years to come.it is always easy to give this advise but it’s not always that easy. Logicallly that is the best thing to do. But do the guy have the financial strength to take care of such complications, and is he emotional in detached from the wife? But one thing in this type of situation is , the men never forgives. It might take years. But at the right time he will do the needful. A lot of ladies are getting married to who is available and funny enough I watch how guys cry tears of joy on the wedding day.

Dump her sorry a$$ and take care of your children the best way you can.
Forget what the society would say. Your life and sanity matters and you shouldn't joke with that.

Meanwhile, don't listen to the Righteousness guy.
Him go start to dey explain how your story is a sign of end time .

Soulflai:
I shouldn't have brought this here but the emotional bargage is too heavy for me to move on in. My marriage of 2 years is about to crumble.

I met my wife in Kaduna Southern part in 2017. Our relationship had been a long distance one as I base in Lagos while she also work in Kaduna, but we eventually married in 2020. The bone of contention is the issue of her ex. That point we are dating, I always caution her to cut communication with the guy, she will do it by deleting the number, but later I will find out they're still relating.

Last month, I purchased a new phone and I had to give her my own. So on the process of reinstalling Whatsapp on her phone, I retrieved all the backup Whatsapp messages 7 which left me devastated. The chat history with her ex really left me broken.

On multiple occasions after I paid her dowry, she met with the guy and they had sex. Multiple times pals! Even after marriage, when she is 5 months pregnant, the guy still had her with my baby inside her!

I am really broken pals, I confronted her on this, she started crying that she will cut communication with him. The guy even send some money to her account on difference time this year.

This is the height of emotional damage. I am just leaving each day just to find my leg financially. I am trying my best, but it is not enough.

Lastly, I called the so-called ex on phone to cut communication with her, the guy is in Kaduna I think while we are in Lagos. She also blocked him all avenues likewise. My decision now is that any time I discovered any form of communication between her and the guy, it is over with the marriage. I think she is not really in to me like that, which beg the question while she married me in first instance.

If am your brother, what advice would you recommend? I only choose to be lenient because the kids are just too small to have their parents separated early. If not, I would have sent her parking!.

Right now I am just not happy with life afterall.

Ebubu9:
he is broke. Didn’t you read the wife’s ex had been sending money to her account since this year?

Many married women run to their ex (if he is now wealthy) to take care of them when their husband go broke.

If they are in bad relations with their ex, they find new men who can afford to give.

Cazzim:


what is this one saying self, nawao so woman know de follow for all those crimes u mention abi?? even as that what this topic and what u are saying gat to do here, some people no get Sense oo, ur type are the ones cheating even with pregnancy

Soulflai:
The kids are 2 years old now,all her sex excapade with her ex happened 2 years ago.

Soulflai:
I shouldn't have brought this here but the emotional bargage is too heavy for me to move on in. My marriage of 2 years is about to crumble.

I met my wife in Kaduna Southern part in 2017. Our relationship had been a long distance one as I base in Lagos while she also work in Kaduna, but we eventually married in 2020. The bone of contention is the issue of her ex. That point we are dating, I always caution her to cut communication with the guy, she will do it by deleting the number, but later I will find out they're still relating.

Last month, I purchased a new phone and I had to give her my own. So on the process of reinstalling Whatsapp on her phone, I retrieved all the backup Whatsapp messages 7 which left me devastated. The chat history with her ex really left me broken.

On multiple occasions after I paid her dowry, she met with the guy and they had sex. Multiple times pals! Even after marriage, when she is 5 months pregnant, the guy still had her with my baby inside her!

I am really broken pals, I confronted her on this, she started crying that she will cut communication with him. The guy even send some money to her account on difference time this year.

This is the height of emotional damage. I am just leaving each day just to find my leg financially. I am trying my best, but it is not enough.

Lastly, I called the so-called ex on phone to cut communication with her, the guy is in Kaduna I think while we are in Lagos. She also blocked him all avenues likewise. My decision now is that any time I discovered any form of communication between her and the guy, it is over with the marriage. I think she is not really in to me like that, which beg the question while she married me in first instance.

If am your brother, what advice would you recommend? I only choose to be lenient because the kids are just too small to have their parents separated early. If not, I would have sent her parking!.

Right now I am just not happy with life afterall.

AishaDant:
Op, if you want to have peace, divorce her and move on with your kids.

If she can have sex with another man while pregnant for you, she might do even worse.

Please, for your sanity, leave her and move on. You will find someone else who is into you and who appreciates the man that you are.