A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage - Family (3)

A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage - Family (3) - Nairaland

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Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Richy4(m): 10:13am On Feb 23, 2023

Klass99:
I don't understand, you already had these 4 kids before your ex-husband? If I recall correctly you had just one kid before your ex i.e. the boy who is now 15 years old, is that correct?

There's something single parents, widows, widowers and divorced people need to understand when it comes to their children. Don't expect your partners to love them unconditionally or in the same vein you do, if your partner likes you and likes your kids well enough, to want to align themselves with you and your children, please accept and embrace that.

The best thing a partner or subsequent spouse can be to your kids is a friend and a mentor, to help guide, instruct and teach them, the way older friends and good mentors do for us in life or at work. Don't be looking for or insisting on fatherly or motherly love, dem no follow you fck the fck wey born those children, so they can't feel the same way you do. It should be enough if they like you and your kids.

My dearest Klass,
The sound of Kolanut is not really how it taste in the mouth

...She should abort the mission in my opinion.. But it's up to her

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by lereinter(m): 10:40am On Feb 23, 2023

ValCon888:
Firstly, a single mother of four is a steep hill to climb for any man. You're lucky someone is ready and willing to accept you and your four kids into his home.

Not to cohabit, but to make an honest woman out of you by asking for your hand in marriage.

At the end of the day, the choice is yours. If you don't want to then don't. For me, I'd advise you to for the security and companionship.

One thing's certain; offers like this only happen once in a lifetime.

I hope 20 years from now you won't look back at this moment and be gnashing your teeth.

Will the man take care of the kids?

Cos the father of the children is alive

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by lereinter(m): 10:46am On Feb 23, 2023

Single mother of 4 for 2 men

If you born for this one it will make diff children from 3 men

Who knows the future only God

Go and settle with your ex husband

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Princessdainty(m): 11:14am On Feb 23, 2023

Follow your mind. The duty of being a mother of four is enough tussle and you don't want to add marriage to it.

Continue to date untill he has proven that he's capable enough as a husband and step father to your four children.

It's so easy to manipulate a woman, once marriage is mentioned. The irony.

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by frozen70(f): 11:22am On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys , I am a 36 years old single mother of four my son will be 15 in aug, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june. I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and lives with us , I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years. I have been friend with this man a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children, he is asking for my hand in marriage, to be honest I don't want to be married again, all i want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala. He ask for my hand in marriage I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again I told him what my ex did , he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house . I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP . But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck he want me to accept his proposal. I am confuse Please advice me is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

You can still be in a deep relationship with him till you make up your mind

Dont let him force you to accept his offer

Are you very convinced that it's for real and not to add more to your love life problem

What about your ex, how are you sure he is not coming back for you, since there was no form of divorce but just separation

In all just follow your heart

2 Likes

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Microwhy: 11:33am On Feb 23, 2023

slan87:
I'm not the only one who advised her to focus on her children Mr, I only advised her based on what she said that "she's not ready for marriage stress n she's also afraid of not making another mistake.

So, if you were to advise her what would you have said.

My brother! Women only cry of what they are actually guilty of.
Man can hang himself when you accuse him wrongly but women would careless if they're not guilty.
For coming to a faceless forum, she has already madeup her mind but just want to lie to herself and not Nairalanders..

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by verybadmouth(m): 12:01pm On Feb 23, 2023

They say if you vote for Obi, you will get a good husband

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Iseoluwani: 12:02pm On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys, I am a 36 years old single mother of four. My son will be 15 in August, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june.

I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and live with us, I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years.

I have been friend with this man, a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children. He is asking for my hand in marriage. To be honest, I don't want to be married again, all I want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala.

He asked for my hand in marriage, I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again. I told him what my ex did, he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house. I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP. But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck. He wants me to accept his proposal. I am confused.

Please advice me. Is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

You are scared...... That's enough reason for you to reject it

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Elidrisy20: 12:03pm On Feb 23, 2023

Don't panic

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Aringon(m): 12:03pm On Feb 23, 2023

Madam go.on your knees and ask your Heavenly father for the way out. Humans instinct and advice might not be enough. Thank you

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys, I am a 36 years old single mother of four. My son will be 15 in August, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june.

I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and live with us, I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years.

I have been friend with this man, a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children. He is asking for my hand in marriage. To be honest, I don't want to be married again, all I want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala.

He asked for my hand in marriage, I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again. I told him what my ex did, he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house. I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP. But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck. He wants me to accept his proposal. I am confused.

Please advice me. Is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

3 Likes

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Nobody: 12:06pm On Feb 23, 2023

gaby:
Always follow your instincts and you'd hardly go wrong and whatever the results, you'd take it in good fate knowing you listened and acted according to the dictates of your inner man.

Gbamm

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Akporuka(m): 12:06pm On Feb 23, 2023

Madam, I will advise you to go ahead and settle down with the man if you like him but you need to do some findings how his children will feel when you finally live with him. I wish you good luck.

2 Likes

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Okiton: 12:06pm On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys, I am a 36 years old single mother of four. My son will be 15 in August, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june.

I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and live with us, I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years.

I have been friend with this man, a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children. He is asking for my hand in marriage. To be honest, I don't want to be married again, all I want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala.

He asked for my hand in marriage, I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again. I told him what my ex did, he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house. I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP. But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck. He wants me to accept his proposal. I am confused.

Please advice me. Is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

don't be stupid
Stay true to urself and raise your kids. Men can pretend now and turn something else later and in the end you loose.
If na fuccck de hungry you find one young boy wey go de service u better. If you need my service am also available

I repeat never u make that mistake

2 Likes

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Nobody: 12:08pm On Feb 23, 2023*

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Bahamas95(m): 12:08pm On Feb 23, 2023

Aunty you're a very lucky woman, most men would run when they hear you have four children but this man doesn't care. That's true love, give him a chance.

He has passed the test of not just falling in love with you but also with your children....That's the most important thing.

5 Likes

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Moh247: 12:08pm On Feb 23, 2023

You still dey do shakara to this one time offer.... I think you are getting addicted to single mother life style and it's bad. Your children would grow up and leave you, that's when you would need a companion

3 Likes

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Amaka430(f): 12:09pm On Feb 23, 2023

marriage is till death do us part if your first husband is alive you should not talk about marriage
If you remarry you are just an adulterer before God

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by kambili999(f): 12:09pm On Feb 23, 2023

Weirdcamila:
You didn’t include if you had sex with him

OMG. Was this really necessary huh

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by basty: 12:10pm On Feb 23, 2023

Please pray over it.

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by sotall(m): 12:10pm On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys, I am a 36 years old single mother of four. My son will be 15 in August, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june.

I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and live with us, I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years.

I have been friend with this man, a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children. He is asking for my hand in marriage. To be honest, I don't want to be married again, all I want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala.

He asked for my hand in marriage, I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again. I told him what my ex did, he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house. I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP. But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck. He wants me to accept his proposal. I am confused.

Please advice me. Is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

Dont try it.
Accepting to be his wife will distract your efforts from the children to himself.

Having four children from a previous marriage needs a lot of attention and efforts and adding this marriage to it will come with too much pressure. It aint worth it.
If you are giving the children too much attention, the man will complain. I have seen this happen too many times.

If you are currently buoyant enough and you are confident of raising these four kids, please stick with them and give them a good upbringing.
They will be your future stars.

This marriage you are considering is a distraction.

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by osazsky(m): 12:10pm On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys, I am a 36 years old single mother of four. My son will be 15 in August, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june.

I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and live with us, I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years.

I have been friend with this man, a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children. He is asking for my hand in marriage. To be honest, I don't want to be married again, all I want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala.

He asked for my hand in marriage, I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again. I told him what my ex did, he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house. I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP. But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck. He wants me to accept his proposal. I am confused.

Please advice me. Is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

settle with ur first hus...There is something u are not telling us...this ur case strong o

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by redcliff: 12:12pm On Feb 23, 2023

ValCon888:
Firstly, a single mother of four is a steep hill to climb for any man. You're lucky someone is ready and willing to accept you and your four kids into his home.

Not to cohabit, but to make an honest woman out of you by asking for your hand in marriage.

At the end of the day, the choice is yours. If you don't want to then don't. For me, I'd advise you to for the security and companionship.

One thing's certain; offers like this only happen once in a lifetime.

I hope 20 years from now you won't look back at this moment and be gnashing your teeth.

you are a wise man! them for close this thread after your comment because no other comment fit pass this one again as far as this thread is concerned!

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Okorosemeka: 12:12pm On Feb 23, 2023

ValCon888:
Firstly, a single mother of four is a steep hill to climb for any man. You're lucky someone is ready and willing to accept you and your four kids into his home.

Not to cohabit, but to make an honest woman out of you by asking for your hand in marriage.

At the end of the day, the choice is yours. If you don't want to then don't. For me, I'd advise you to for the security and companionship.

One thing's certain; offers like this only happen once in a lifetime.

I hope 20 years from now you won't look back at this moment and be gnashing your teeth.

the best matured advice,it is obvious you like the man but don't want further marriage dramas, sometimes we have to tackle problems first to see how to solve it,follow your heart,that man isI a good man for considering and getting ready to take in you and your children as his own,for that singular act he is worthy to be your partner and companion

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Gandrova: 12:12pm On Feb 23, 2023

Firstly pray for Almighty God to lead you.
Secondly your kids and you need a man as to be able to take lead because, it is usually difficult for a woman to mix the two roles together irrespective of her status with wealth.
Another aspect key is your emotions and feelings, if you don't go are ahead and marry him you guys would only be fuccck mates and when you are tired of each other everyone would move separately. But if you are married the thinking and vision would be different from the said above statement.
Lastly, since you love him and he loves you also give it a trial with Almighty direction.

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Faposky95: 12:13pm On Feb 23, 2023

Something tells me you wanna eat the cake and have wat is still left.....
...only you ..?!
Either say NO and do wat you gat to
...or take the bait and end in the belly of the whale.....
...you make it out and you're the STAR

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by XYZo: 12:14pm On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Thanks. I have known him for a year he is a great man and would love to be a part of his life my children adore him but when I remember how my ex husband was also a saint in the begining, he promised me heaven on earth, he even swore in front of my late mother and elder brother that he love me and my kids like his own , only for him to change his mind after the wedding , that's why I am scared that the same thing may happen again. I haven't met or spoken to his children ,they are adult the daughter is already married with kids and the son lives abroad.

This part isn't clear . Is he not the owner of the kids ? Or was that your second marriage ?

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by chatinent: 12:15pm On Feb 23, 2023

Dey play.

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by Geovanni412(m): 12:15pm On Feb 23, 2023

Vyvyanvyvy:
Hello guys, I am a 36 years old single mother of four. My son will be 15 in August, first daughter 10 in october, my third 5 and youngest 3 by june.

I have separated from my husband because he didn't want my son to come and live with us, I have been taking care of them singlehandedly for 3 years.

I have been friend with this man, a widower who is 57 years and a father of 2 children. He is asking for my hand in marriage. To be honest, I don't want to be married again, all I want is to focus on raising my kids because I have been through a lot in my previous marriage and I don't want another marriage wahala.

He asked for my hand in marriage, I rejected him and I had explained to him why I don't want to marry again. I told him what my ex did, he said he is a mature man he will love me and my children and he will never hate them or ask them to leave his house. I told him I have to think about it and I will get back to him ASAP. But I am still scared to accept his proposal because I don't want history to repeat itself and he is still on my neck. He wants me to accept his proposal. I am confused.

Please advice me. Is it a wise choice for me to get married again after everything I have been through in the past?

How many daughters do you have?

Investigate the man - we don't want to hear stories that touch

I hope you understand what I mean

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by KaptainAfrika: 12:18pm On Feb 23, 2023

You get big nyash ?

1 Like

Re: A Widower Asking For My Hand In Marriage by SaintCaleb: 12:24pm On Feb 23, 2023

Why is number 21 on repeat 🔂 you were 21 when you gave birth to your son and now the widower is 21 years older than you are. Good luck on the decision you make.

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