hmmm... this is a difficult case...

Deal with him personally

hahaha............................family palava on point

U need God's intervention and hope u ar a working class lady not an house wife with that jst invest on ur children future. If he sees u are progressing he will respect u more

Simple let the in-law know abt the situation then u can now take action base on their reply. Don't involve an outsider pls.

angelchinny:
Am a well dedicated nairalander but I created this new account for this issue. I have been married for 4 years now with 3 children and since the 2nd year of our marriage my husband has been constantly cheating on me.

The way he goes about it is even heartbreaking, he does it like his into a love relationship with them and not just for fun.

There is this particular girl that he calls like 3 times everyday because I check his call log and saw they keep in touch more than twice everyday. I stupidly called the girl and warned her to stay clear off my man and she confessed he didn't tell her he was married, I confronted my hubby and he was forming defensive and was telling me dat am accusing him wrongly and he will soon start cheating. I called the girl back in the evening and she told me that even as am calling that his call is entering her phone, that he called earlier to beg her to give him chance to explain..The next day I left with my children to a far away state and he pleaded that he will change and all that. The issue is that he continued with this shameless behaviour, our live-in nanny later confessed to my cousin last month that he approached her and I was so devastated. He knelt down and begged and I easily forgave him..

Forgive me for my long episode but I really need your help on how to punish him cos I went to his call log yesterday and saw the same girl that made me take the risk to leave with my children to another state calling him again and he is reciprocating the calls..his a very jealous person, he goes crazy when a male friend calls me..I want to make him pass through all the pains I have endured all these years.. What do I do pls?

why not check ur behaviour and see if there is anything you have been doing that he does not like. ladies una fo marry finish begin dey form like fools, forgetting to do or perform ur conjugal rights u go come come nairaland dey cry dey form innocentie.abegi

Work on your finances first.

Be careful about the punishment you dish out, it can very easily turn against you.

Get a life, work yourself into shape, hang out and tell him squarely that you decided to go sightseeing with someone else cus he's ignoring you.
But! Don't try to pretend you are blatantly cheating. Just convey the message that you need attention and there are plenty pal willing to give it if he doesn't want to.

What do I know but I think the relationship still redeemable. How? I don't know

angelchinny:
Am a well dedicated nairalander but I created this new account for this issue. I have been married for 4 years now with 3 children and since the 2nd year of our marriage my husband has been constantly cheating on me.

The way he goes about it is even heartbreaking, he does it like his into a love relationship with them and not just for fun.

There is this particular girl that he calls like 3 times everyday because I check his call log and saw they keep in touch more than twice everyday. I stupidly called the girl and warned her to stay clear off my man and she confessed he didn't tell her he was married, I confronted my hubby and he was forming defensive and was telling me dat am accusing him wrongly and he will soon start cheating. I called the girl back in the evening and she told me that even as am calling that his call is entering her phone, that he called earlier to beg her to give him chance to explain..The next day I left with my children to a far away state and he pleaded that he will change and all that. The issue is that he continued with this shameless behaviour, our live-in nanny later confessed to my cousin last month that he approached her and I was so devastated. He knelt down and begged and I easily forgave him..

Forgive me for my long episode but I really need your help on how to punish him cos I went to his call log yesterday and saw the same girl that made me take the risk to leave with my children to another state calling him again and he is reciprocating the calls..his a very jealous person, he goes crazy when a male friend calls me..I want to make him pass through all the pains I have endured all these years.. What do I do pls?

''are you Lightskin?

Do not leave your marriage, it is your support system, but the only way you will feel better is to cheat too. Believe me, there is nothing else that will make you feel better. Prayer doesnt help in this.

you too should kill him physically or spiritually

angelchinny:
Am a well dedicated nairalander but I created this new account for this issue. I have been married for 4 years now with 3 children and since the 2nd year of our marriage my husband has been constantly cheating on me.

The way he goes about it is even heartbreaking, he does it like his into a love relationship with them and not just for fun.

There is this particular girl that he calls like 3 times everyday because I check his call log and saw they keep in touch more than twice everyday. I stupidly called the girl and warned her to stay clear off my man and she confessed he didn't tell her he was married, I confronted my hubby and he was forming defensive and was telling me dat am accusing him wrongly and he will soon start cheating. I called the girl back in the evening and she told me that even as am calling that his call is entering her phone, that he called earlier to beg her to give him chance to explain..The next day I left with my children to a far away state and he pleaded that he will change and all that. The issue is that he continued with this shameless behaviour, our live-in nanny later confessed to my cousin last month that he approached her and I was so devastated. He knelt down and begged and I easily forgave him..

Forgive me for my long episode but I really need your help on how to punish him cos I went to his call log yesterday and saw the same girl that made me take the risk to leave with my children to another state calling him again and he is reciprocating the calls..his a very jealous person, he goes crazy when a male friend calls me..I want to make him pass through all the pains I have endured all these years.. What do I do pls?

Can't you just pretend as if nothing is happening? You will be good, thank me later.

Atlantian:
Do not leave your marriage, it is your support system, but the only way you will feel better is to cheat too. Believe me, there is nothing else that will make you feel better. Prayer doesnt help in this.

Lord have mercy

coming back to modify

poor you.he has you in a corner thats is why he is comfortable doing all he does.there is no worse situation to be in.i think its a common thing for some humans to want to exploit vulnerability.its all got to do with the weakness in them.find a passion.knowing you have a world outside of his that brings you so much fulfilment can be humbling.he seems to be a man with little mental strenght.

U know d best thing to do cause I dont want to be a Participis Criminis.

give me your numba

My advice is for u to keep ur mind away from his activities and focus on ur kids their love should be paramount to you unless u will just give ur self heart attack and the end of the day the lady will replace u and also suffer ur kids pls focus more on their development men will always be men instead buy condom and put it inside his bag I no that one day he will come apologising. I am a man I ave done this before dat is exactly what my wife did I felt guility

[quote][/quote]wait oooooooh, sista did u said dat u r married 4 4 yrs wit 3 kidz? abeq r u a doq?
:'dia s a probability dat u miqht bear 8 kids in 10 yrs ooooh.........take am easy oooooo

angelchinny:

Thankz 4 ur advice, his parents and mine are aware of d suituation, even I traveled to anoda state my dad didn't even talk sence in2 him. My parents where jst advicin me not to leave my matrimonal home 4 any reason, infact I jst don't undastand them..My husband has a group of useless friends dat doesn't hv value or respect for there wives

if u are a christian and are legally married pray for God to deliver him

From your story I understand that your family and that of your husband doesn't see anything wrong in what he(husband) is doing. I will advice you to stop telling anybody about it and stop confronting him ( after all it hasn't yield any fruit)act like he does not exits. Be happy with yourself so you don't die of hbp. Do things that makes you happy, try and get a job so that you can always leave the house for work. Save! Save! And save as much as you can cause you never can tell with this type of fool.

Demigods:



Can't you just pretend as if nothing is happening? You will be good, thank me later.

She should pretend as if nothing is happening bah and then later get STIs

If only it's easy to punish men in the same manner!

Do you need advice on a revenge mission or on how to have your man back? Cos it seems you are asking for advise on HOW TO PUNISH HIM.

angelchinny:

I would hv left him a long time ago but I jst think twice cos of two reasons
1) Cos of my children, hw I will take them along wit me
2)Cos am not working yet, I can't provide 4 myself n my children

God is gonna heal ur marriage soon but u nid to pray abt it & b very careful not to b a victim of HIV which u didn't contribute to & Den get engaged bkos hiz always doing wat hiz doing bkos hiz economical ahead of u...also looking @ ur dressing bkos men are attracted to attractive packages

Emphasis is on getting back at him than a solution in itself. Sounds like you want our approval for you to start cheating as well.

Put pepper in his ugbola and anus when he is sleeping

PM me your number and let's start cheating on him too

angelchinny:
I believe he does dat becos he knws I forgive him easily, dats why I wanna punish him

Op, pls be dedicated to ur Husband/Marriage not to Nairaland. dt myt b a reason he's Fuvking other Girls out dia.

@ angelchinny,

After punishing him, then what?

I am sorry to hear that you are passing through this. It's painful and heartbreaking. We know the options you have and which ever one you take is not an easy one but whichever one you decide to do depends on what risks and consequences you are willing to take and accept, how much you value your life and health and how much you value what people think about you.

Option 1. Staying in the marriage.
I am sorry but the chances of him changing is really small unless he puts his mind to it. So this option really is more like you developing a coping mechanism. Can you continuously turn a blind eye, suffer emotional torture, know you are being lied to, appear stupid to his other women, share him, fight off other women etc. You and your children are at risk if one of his women decides she wants your position . She could kill you. You could contact HIV. I know you wrote that you have agreed you will not have sex with him. Sweetheart, for how long? Soon, you would want your husband and the moment you do it, you are at risk of getting diseases from him. Another thing also is that you will be teaching your children that that is what a home is supposed to be like. You will bring up boys who would cheat on their wives and girls who would accept it.

Option 2. Leave the marriage.

In the society where we live in, you will be called a failure. People will think you were not patient. Your kids would not grow up with both parents and you would have to go into the dating scene again if you want.

Whatever option you choose, it's not going to be easy but you need to go back to work immediately. You need your independence and savings. Women needs to have their own money . I know it's a difficult situation but you have to choose which one you want. Don't let people do the choosing for you.

angelchinny:
Am a well dedicated nairalander but I created this new account for this issue. I have been married for 4 years now with 3 children and since the 2nd year of our marriage my husband has been constantly cheating on me.

The way he goes about it is even heartbreaking, he does it like his into a love relationship with them and not just for fun.

There is this particular girl that he calls like 3 times everyday because I check his call log and saw they keep in touch more than twice everyday. I stupidly called the girl and warned her to stay clear off my man and she confessed he didn't tell her he was married, I confronted my hubby and he was forming defensive and was telling me dat am accusing him wrongly and he will soon start cheating. I called the girl back in the evening and she told me that even as am calling that his call is entering her phone, that he called earlier to beg her to give him chance to explain..The next day I left with my children to a far away state and he pleaded that he will change and all that. The issue is that he continued with this shameless behaviour, our live-in nanny later confessed to my cousin last month that he approached her and I was so devastated. He knelt down and begged and I easily forgave him..

Forgive me for my long episode but I really need your help on how to punish him cos I went to his call log yesterday and saw the same girl that made me take the risk to leave with my children to another state calling him again and he is reciprocating the calls..his a very jealous person, he goes crazy when a male friend calls me..I want to make him pass through all the pains I have endured all these years.. What do I do pls?

NOTHING!!! Pray for him,be a good wife and mother,he'll change.any other thing will be more devastating,you had kids for him already,keep them,take care of them,pray for him like a said earlier and don't hurt youself. Above all,let him understand you know all his vices, some how,and pretend as if you don't know or care.I bet you he'll be more worried than you.although,it might not be that easy but persevere and pretend as if you r not hurt.shikena