₦airaland Forum

beleza:
I am not in a good situation at the moment. I am in love with a guy who has a girlfriend.Before you judge me here is my story.I am a lady in my late 20s, pretty, funny, lovable and a good christian but the major problem I have been facing since I knew about dating is the kind of guys I get attracted,they are usually cool but unserious,have commitment issues, are emotionally unavailable and just want to sleep with me.I am very emotional and I tend to show my feelings towards a guy so soon.Secondly I have never had a relationship that lasted more than six months.

In my 4 years in the university, I didnt have any relationship, not that i didnt want but guys were not just coming.My friends always felt I should have a lot of admirers because of my looks but the reverse was the case.After school, the few ones I tried to have,turned out sour.One was my former fellowship pastor so I thought he will be serious as he was old enough for marriage.This was about 4 years ago.I was disappointed when I realised that he was just after sex.He started acting up, withdrawing, saying I was disturbing him emotionally and that he is tired.Later, he said we should do friends with benefit, I just cut him off totally. This was a supposed pastor trying to take advvantage of my weakness.

A year later in 2013 met another dude.It didnt last up to six months before we broke up due to our numerous differences.he also didnt make a commitment, the major thing was that we liked ourselves.It took me a long time to get time over him.fast forward to this year met a very funny and inteeligent guy.we met on an online socialnetworking site.he is in his 30's and he seemed just like my perfect man. There was this connection I had with him and we could talk about anything at anytime.snooped on his social media accounts and I didnt see any signs of a lady or girlfriend so I felt the coast was clear.Only for me to ask him one day and he says he is in a relationship,even showed me her photo.I had already started having feelings for him, it was hard to turn back.We were so attracted to each other and it was to hard to resist him even though I knew he just wanted sex from me.Dude travels out and isnt communicating like before, even though he told me his gf is in nigeria but I wasn't convinced.

Our major fallout was when on my birthday I didnt get message fro him until a day later, I decided to send a nasty message to him saying he was just after my body and all.Dude gets angry, I started apologising almost immediately, this happed in October.he just reads my messages doesnt reply doesnt pick my calls.Since the incident happend, I havent been myself, I have never begged or apologised to any one like this in my life, I have cried almost everyday for the past two months, I cant concentrate at work.He recently came back but didn't tell me but I found out on my own.Went to his house a few days ago unannounced just to apologize, He got more angry in the process saying he warned not to come without telling him.He said he has forgiven me and also apologized for leading on but ended up saying he has issues with people that dont trust him.The worst part is he knows I love him so he is doing this to hurt me more.

I just cant get him out of my mind, I think about him everyday, I am in a dilemma.we never had sex, we just kissed and touched so I dont understand what is going on. I still sent him msgs yesterday but he just read them and didnt reply.I have uninstalled my whatsapp because of him so I cant send him msgs.At this point, I am fed up, I don't why love treats me like this. I need your advice asap .

beleza:
I am not in a good situation at the moment. I am in love with a guy who has a girlfriend.Before you judge me here is my story.I am a lady in my late 20s, pretty, funny, lovable and a good christian but the major problem I have been facing since I knew about dating is the kind of guys I get attracted,they are usually cool but unserious,have commitment issues, are emotionally unavailable and just want to sleep with me.I am very emotional and I tend to show my feelings towards a guy so soon.Secondly I have never had a relationship that lasted more than six months.

In my 4 years in the university, I didnt have any relationship, not that i didnt want but guys were not just coming.My friends always felt I should have a lot of admirers because of my looks but the reverse was the case.After school, the few ones I tried to have,turned out sour.One was my former fellowship pastor so I thought he will be serious as he was old enough for marriage.This was about 4 years ago.I was disappointed when I realised that he was just after sex.He started acting up, withdrawing, saying I was disturbing him emotionally and that he is tired.Later, he said we should do friends with benefit, I just cut him off totally. This was a supposed pastor trying to take advvantage of my weakness.

A year later in 2013 met another dude.It didnt last up to six months before we broke up due to our numerous differences.he also didnt make a commitment, the major thing was that we liked ourselves.It took me a long time to get time over him.fast forward to this year met a very funny and inteeligent guy.we met on an online socialnetworking site.he is in his 30's and he seemed just like my perfect man. There was this connection I had with him and we could talk about anything at anytime.snooped on his social media accounts and I didnt see any signs of a lady or girlfriend so I felt the coast was clear.Only for me to ask him one day and he says he is in a relationship,even showed me her photo.I had already started having feelings for him, it was hard to turn back.We were so attracted to each other and it was to hard to resist him even though I knew he just wanted sex from me.Dude travels out and isnt communicating like before, even though he told me his gf is in nigeria but I wasn't convinced.

Our major fallout was when on my birthday I didnt get message fro him until a day later, I decided to send a nasty message to him saying he was just after my body and all.Dude gets angry, I started apologising almost immediately, this happed in October.he just reads my messages doesnt reply doesnt pick my calls.Since the incident happend, I havent been myself, I have never begged or apologised to any one like this in my life, I have cried almost everyday for the past two months, I cant concentrate at work.He recently came back but didn't tell me but I found out on my own.Went to his house a few days ago unannounced just to apologize, He got more angry in the process saying he warned not to come without telling him.He said he has forgiven me and also apologized for leading on but ended up saying he has issues with people that dont trust him.The worst part is he knows I love him so he is doing this to hurt me more.

I just cant get him out of my mind, I think about him everyday, I am in a dilemma.we never had sex, we just kissed and touched so I dont understand what is going on. I still sent him msgs yesterday but he just read them and didnt reply.I have uninstalled my whatsapp because of him so I cant send him msgs.At this point, I am fed up, I don't why love treats me like this. I need your advice asap .

beleza:
I am not in a good situation at the moment. I am in love with a guy who has a girlfriend.Before you judge me here is my story.I am a lady in my late 20s, pretty, funny, lovable and a good christian but the major problem I have been facing since I knew about dating is the kind of guys I get attracted,they are usually cool but unserious,have commitment issues, are emotionally unavailable and just want to sleep with me.I am very emotional and I tend to show my feelings towards a guy so soon.Secondly I have never had a relationship that lasted more than six months.

In my 4 years in the university, I didnt have any relationship, not that i didnt want but guys were not just coming.My friends always felt I should have a lot of admirers because of my looks but the reverse was the case.After school, the few ones I tried to have,turned out sour.One was my former fellowship pastor so I thought he will be serious as he was old enough for marriage.This was about 4 years ago.I was disappointed when I realised that he was just after sex.He started acting up, withdrawing, saying I was disturbing him emotionally and that he is tired.Later, he said we should do friends with benefit, I just cut him off totally. This was a supposed pastor trying to take advvantage of my weakness.

A year later in 2013 met another dude.It didnt last up to six months before we broke up due to our numerous differences.he also didnt make a commitment, the major thing was that we liked ourselves.It took me a long time to get time over him.fast forward to this year met a very funny and inteeligent guy.we met on an online socialnetworking site.he is in his 30's and he seemed just like my perfect man. There was this connection I had with him and we could talk about anything at anytime.snooped on his social media accounts and I didnt see any signs of a lady or girlfriend so I felt the coast was clear.Only for me to ask him one day and he says he is in a relationship,even showed me her photo.I had already started having feelings for him, it was hard to turn back.We were so attracted to each other and it was to hard to resist him even though I knew he just wanted sex from me.Dude travels out and isnt communicating like before, even though he told me his gf is in nigeria but I wasn't convinced.

Our major fallout was when on my birthday I didnt get message fro him until a day later, I decided to send a nasty message to him saying he was just after my body and all.Dude gets angry, I started apologising almost immediately, this happed in October.he just reads my messages doesnt reply doesnt pick my calls.Since the incident happend, I havent been myself, I have never begged or apologised to any one like this in my life, I have cried almost everyday for the past two months, I cant concentrate at work.He recently came back but didn't tell me but I found out on my own.Went to his house a few days ago unannounced just to apologize, He got more angry in the process saying he warned not to come without telling him.He said he has forgiven me and also apologized for leading on but ended up saying he has issues with people that dont trust him.The worst part is he knows I love him so he is doing this to hurt me more.

I just cant get him out of my mind, I think about him everyday, I am in a dilemma.we never had sex, we just kissed and touched so I dont understand what is going on. I still sent him msgs yesterday but he just read them and didnt reply.I have uninstalled my whatsapp because of him so I cant send him msgs.At this point, I am fed up, I don't why love treats me like this. I need your advice asap .

ProfSamurai:
It's a hard one sis.
Are you pretty in a sexy way?

What's your selling point. Your beauty or brains?
If you are the type that makes a positive input in a man's life - you should consider the 90 day rule when it comes to s3z, if you can't lock up shop for a longer time.

I'm attracted to pretty girls, but I need more than a pretty face and hot s3z to keep me. I do not usually ask the girls out for s3z, but when that is their only selling point - I tend to chop and clean mouth.

My advice? Mop up your attitude, keep a lot of male friends, and change your mindset. We all are not after your body. Goodluck

Estharfabian:
Well, trust me girl....Your world Would be Much Easier n less dramatic if You Stopped Making It Revolve around "Guys"...

One question, You're in Your late 20's Huh? Are You independent? Independent Like, Do You just want A Guy Coz U want someone taking care of Your needs, financially? coz U seem pretty desperate to me!

Maybe the reason these guys are backing Out is 'Coz They feel You'd only be parasitic towards 'em...and No one wants that!

Bout the 2013 guy...He doesn't like You..I think U should just forget bout him..No Real guy would see a Lady in that much pain and still ignore her the way he did..he's A douchebag!

Just start working Towards Your future...Be independent, be successful, be beautiful, be bold, be classy...that's when Guys would come, You'd only have to choose from so many...

beleza:
I am not in a good situation at the moment. I am in love with a guy who has a girlfriend.Before you judge me here is my story.I am a lady in my late 20s, pretty, funny, lovable and a good christian but the major problem I have been facing since I knew about dating is the kind of guys I get attracted,they are usually cool but unserious,have commitment issues, are emotionally unavailable and just want to sleep with me.I am very emotional and I tend to show my feelings towards a guy so soon.Secondly I have never had a relationship that lasted more than six months.

In my 4 years in the university, I didnt have any relationship, not that i didnt want but guys were not just coming.My friends always felt I should have a lot of admirers because of my looks but the reverse was the case.After school, the few ones I tried to have,turned out sour.One was my former fellowship pastor so I thought he will be serious as he was old enough for marriage.This was about 4 years ago.I was disappointed when I realised that he was just after sex.He started acting up, withdrawing, saying I was disturbing him emotionally and that he is tired.Later, he said we should do friends with benefit, I just cut him off totally. This was a supposed pastor trying to take advvantage of my weakness.

A year later in 2013 met another dude.It didnt last up to six months before we broke up due to our numerous differences.he also didnt make a commitment, the major thing was that we liked ourselves.It took me a long time to get time over him.fast forward to this year met a very funny and inteeligent guy.we met on an online socialnetworking site.he is in his 30's and he seemed just like my perfect man. There was this connection I had with him and we could talk about anything at anytime.snooped on his social media accounts and I didnt see any signs of a lady or girlfriend so I felt the coast was clear.Only for me to ask him one day and he says he is in a relationship,even showed me her photo.I had already started having feelings for him, it was hard to turn back.We were so attracted to each other and it was to hard to resist him even though I knew he just wanted sex from me.Dude travels out and isnt communicating like before, even though he told me his gf is in nigeria but I wasn't convinced.

Our major fallout was when on my birthday I didnt get message fro him until a day later, I decided to send a nasty message to him saying he was just after my body and all.Dude gets angry, I started apologising almost immediately, this happed in October.he just reads my messages doesnt reply doesnt pick my calls.Since the incident happend, I havent been myself, I have never begged or apologised to any one like this in my life, I have cried almost everyday for the past two months, I cant concentrate at work.He recently came back but didn't tell me but I found out on my own.Went to his house a few days ago unannounced just to apologize, He got more angry in the process saying he warned not to come without telling him.He said he has forgiven me and also apologized for leading on but ended up saying he has issues with people that dont trust him.The worst part is he knows I love him so he is doing this to hurt me more.

I just cant get him out of my mind, I think about him everyday, I am in a dilemma.we never had sex, we just kissed and touched so I dont understand what is going on. I still sent him msgs yesterday but he just read them and didnt reply.I have uninstalled my whatsapp because of him so I cant send him msgs.At this point, I am fed up, I don't why love treats me like this. I need your advice asap .

queenfav:
Ok babe..I understand how u feel because I have encountered some pretty mean stuff in life.First of all,I want you to reinstall your whatsapp messenger.When you do,block him! Secondly,get this book "why men love b.itches" by sherry argov.It would toughen you up, especially if you read it with willingness to stop being too emotional about new guys you meet..Its not a book that would make u bitter or an actual bit.ch,the title just connotes that men love strong women who though can be loving,yet try to maintain their independence.Also a woman who knows when to cut her loses to move on when she is being treated with disdain.Men smell desperation and insecurity from miles away.Tell yourself you don't have to be in a relationship to be complete as a person.Its hard because daily u find your friends and even celebs posting loved up pics and all.That alone can make any single lady stay with a man for all the wrong reasons just to avoid feeling left out.My experience with men is that they want what they can't have.Just try it..the guys you don't want in your life pursue you relentlessly,amidst insults and serious attitude to ward them off you.While the ones you call,text more and show excess affection are bound to trample on your emotions by treating you like trash.Please find a distraction.Get engrossed in your work or academics.Read good books,learn a skill or craft.Basically,do things to make you happy.The key is learning to enjoy your own company.Otherwise you would have serious issues even when you meet the man of your dreams.Learn to pace yourself when it comes to relationships..baby steps darling.Don't just fall yakata,even if you are so obsessed with a guy(like you obviously are)Hide it!A little pride won't hurt you here.See yourself as the best,someone any man would not forget in a hurry.Don't let this guy make a mess of your emotions,you are above all that crap.Make a firm decision never to call him again and stand by it!In life you have to master the art of ignoring people no matter how much you crave for them;do it to the point that the person would start doubting his very existence.Don't live your life in a way that you are too much of a good girl.You have to be strong at times,to drive the message home,that you would not stand to be mistreated and have your emotions thrown back on your face.Lastly,just relax..nothing is wrong with you.You'll certainly meet a great guy that would know how much of a amazing lady you are,and love every inch of you for it!