You guys talking about trust and not snooping I really don't get it. ...I dated this guy and he is everything a woman would want.the first time we met, he told me outright that he had a baby mama. .I was somehow cool with it. I still felt there was something I didn't know. ..For over a year I couldn't find any thing..until last month I used his phone to call my sister and bam! I saw his call log....I was stored with the name absu. ..I wan die that day..fortunately for me I wasn't into him anymore so I no too vex...If I snoop the thing since e for no reach 1year

If you're not ready to leave the relationship once you found something you don't like on the phone, Pls don't go through it. It's of no use.

Nice one... You would have been seeing strange character before you think of that. Goin through his/her will only brake your heart cos your thought/assumption will be far beyond what he/she is doing when you see that you are looking for... Ma opinion sha

naijaboiy:

How can you say such a thing to your boy friend?

I think it's better you stay single till the person who'll marry you comes.

Which one is "you are not married to me so my options are opened".

Why then are you in a relationship? Mutual sexual benefits?

SMH

Is it not better I told him plain, than denying it? I made him understood that the toasters will always be there, that doesnt mean I date them.

Ladies are found of this shiiiit. I always tell me babe, do not go through my phone, my phone is my business not yours. If you find anything ure not cool with on my phone, I don't wanna hear about it, keep it to yourself. I av never gone thru your phone, why are you found of going thru mine....STOP GOING THRU MY PHONE, ESP MY CHAT HISTORY, U ARE PLAYING WITH HEART ATTACK AND HIGH BLOOD PRESSURE. kwikwikwikwi

nkemdi89:

Is it not better I told him plain, than denying it? I made him understood that the toasters will always be there, that doesnt mean I date them.

Nkemdirim y u ignoring me this early morning, good morning

that stuff is soooooo wrong

missyadorable:


You are reasonable! That's how they will date you,marry they won't! But will be vexing if other guys are toasting you...Na girlfriend for life person come this world to do?mtcheeew!

Abi when you are not legally tied to him, I see no reason why he should cut you away from social interaction with other men.

Its very right ooo especially when you do it maturity that's not everyday, and don't start nagging immediately you see something. Just show some signs that will make him want to know the reason for your mood then you pop it out and settle it





Me i will always check unexpectedly and never be tired, men are now like women these days so they also need serious hand/monitoring

AfroKnight:
Me I have not done it before. I nor wan see wetin go pain me. My phone is accessible to my babe. But she too doesn't care about my messages and chats.

She be woman. I know there are guys who would be toasting her, sending love messages and all and me I don't want to see that nonsense make I no I vex curse somebody destiny. (just kidding).

Guy will toast her that's normal . But her reply is what you look out for

Going through your partners phone, in my opinion is amoral.its neither right nor wrong. Its d motive with which its done that judtes it right or wrong.
I feel compelled to share my story, it mite save someone from a bad relationship.
As a young teenager, going through my dad's files and my mom's wardrobe was my pastime. I discovered a lot of family history that i mite never have been told through the habit.
When i started having girlfriends, before the days of mobile phones, i usually would checm their bags and purses, not looking for anything,just fiddling.

Lately, i had a relationship for more than 2 years, and you can guess that my habit continued and i would check fones.
I had grounds not to trust her.

Our first disagreement was because i noticed she didn't av any of my pics on her fones. I had countless of hers on all my devices. Stories of network failure would come up if i use her pic as dp and ask dat she uses mine.

she self confessed to a dirty past with countless men. That was heart breaking.

There was dis colleague (she's a colleague too) that would send romantic messages to her and she claimed there was nothing between them. It turned out she's been screwing him. She later self confessed of the deed which happened when i was out of town and we had a slight disagreement. I forgave her.

She got pregnant and aborted it against my wish.

Later, we broke up cos i felt the relationship was heading nowhere..she's ibo, am yoruba...she won't introduce me to her people or come for my family functions..a indices of a serious relationship were lacking except sex.

after 4 months we made up. I told her i was seeing someone else who did not reside in our cityscapes (with whom i have immediately started having marriage plans...had met the family and all), she said she didn't mind. I asked if she was seeing someone and she said no. I travelled and disengaged with the other lady.

The relationship seemed back on track until after abt 3 weeks. I had noticed a flirtatious gesture between her and a newly recruited guy at work who by all standards cannot be a threat to me. I told her of my observation and she denied any possibility, d guy is just being a friend.

Days later, she forgot one of her fones at work and asked me to hell her pick it up. I did and opened d fone cos i knew her password. Actually, she is said i shd switch off d fone but i didn't, acting on instincts.

I was just checking call logs, pics and all. And so i stumbled on a picture of her and d guy she denied together, in an undeniable posture. I put it to her and who can deny a picture ?

Needless to say that was the end of the relationship. She went public with the guy claiming she didn't cheat on me cos we broke up. It turned out she's met guy before his recruitment, before we broke up. Guy was sacked. End of story.

Moral Lesson : If i didn't av an evidence frkm her fone, she would have kept on srewing me along guy, and probably many others.

If two partners are meant to become one, then there's nothing to hide from each other.

ikp4succes:


bad woman.. babes use this line to get married..becos u not married to me, my options are opened..nonsense. If my babe says that to me, break up instantly.

I am not legally tied down, so it's legally and criminally for him to be going through my phone,is not every secret of your life you share with your friend, there are some family and official issues you may have converse on your phone, because of his prying attitude I don't feel comfortable keeping those things on my phone, he should know before he was there others have been trying to make move, I won't make them enemies because of him. He was only being insecure.

It is strange how people talk about trust. Yes trust is the basis of a relationship but it cuts both ways. Where there is trust, there is no need to check your partners phone but on the other hand where there is trust there should be no need to lock phones up either.

The moment you feel a need to lick your phone then you definitely are involved in something shady. A relationship where there is a standing rule that phones must not be touched is not a trusting relationship.

Where there is trust, there is no need to check the phone formally but there could be a reason to use your partners phone for example, you want to collect a picture or you are looking for a particular info. For example, hubby has sent me an apple I'd sometime ago and I deleted it after reading the message. Now I need it and have forgotten and he is sleeping I don't want to disturb him, I should be able to check his phone to find it without being scared of a rule or what I will find.

It is not a good thing to call every girl you meet outside swthrt or honey or such endearments because in real life it could complicate things cos it puts ideas in the heads of some girls so why call different people by pet names on your phone? In an emergency situation where your close relatives are needed, imagine how dangerous/cumbersome it will be for a stranger who want to help to filter through all the swthrts and honeys in your phone to find the right one.

That being said finding a one sided communication on a partners phone should not cause alarm. However, if your partner responds to the conversation in a manner which shows infidelity, I would rather know my status in the relationship and decide if I want out or not than to stay blind

Good for hypertension

Odunharry:
Do you think going through your partner's phone once a while is right and can you allow your partner go through yours??

As for me , use to hate the habit though I don't have problem with anyone going through my phone until I discovered something years back..

My opinion is simple, Check if you want to check especially if you feeling suspicious or you getting less affection and time from ur partner.

Only people who have something to hide will not allow you check and I don't see what's there to hide form my partner except I have an ulterior motive

why I think it's right if you want to is simple..
It can save from cheating partner, deceitful relationship, heartbreak, disease, forced pregnancy etc etc

CAVEAT Be prepared and be strong to take or face anything you see..

Trust but Verify . Verification is by checking up on your partner from time to time . When you trust too much you end up hurting so much

ishiamu:


I won't go tru ur phone sweety

Don't worry I don put pass lock.

the truth is,their will alwas be something suspicious even if u are not a cheat,so why not just save yourself the heart attack.some girls can evn be so insecure to the extent that they don't trust that number you saved with "sweet mother " on your phone

Checking of fon once help me to end a relationship wen I was in the world. My ex happen to check my fon n saw a tex Meg. And decided to walk away from the relationship which I thank the Lord for her leaving me. But one my own I don't check my partner fon Becos it's a free world.

Certifiedboss:


Guy will toast her that's normal . But her reply is what you look out for

Hmmm. That's right.

ishiamu:


Nkemdirim y u ignoring me this early morning, good morning

I did not ignore you o.

nkemdi89:

Don't worry I don put pass lock.

Nkem is still ishiamu the haters just gave me 2 days ban, dat I called somebori mumu. LoL

They wan shut all man dat is against buhari up.

Nkem hw far jare

missyadorable:



Lol..You are a side chic until a man marries you...The main chic is a wife,not some Girlfriend who serves as a forkmate!

really? lol

It's good to check your partner's phone, but both should be ready to bear the consequences. Checked on my partner's own some years ago and discovered she just had Sex within the span of two weeks relationship with a fellow student. Asked her indirectly she swore by the names of all the gods on earth that nothing happened. But when I made reference to the chats, she started begging, kneeling down, involving friends and relations to intervene bla blah blah...
Since then she allows me access to her phone. We had to part ways later on sha.........

WRONG

Geraraheremehn:


Nkem is still ishiamu the haters just gave me 2 days ban, dat I called somebori mumu. LoL

They wan shut all man dat is against buhari up.

Nkem hw far jare

You sef no use the m word on somebody e no good be cos you no dey feed that person, even if sef you dey feed am e no good to call person that kain yamayama name.

I check my gf phone and she does that too. It's really not a big deal cus if you are in a serious relationship, I will advise you do just to know if you settling with the right one.
Imagine a lady that cheated on her fiance few weeks to their wedding. The said guy was her ex and there is this perception that she will always cheat with him over and over again.
Conclusively, it's better I check her phone, breakup with her while dating than to have a broken home later in life.
Peace

Odunharry:

confirm talk bro... People flirt alot and Cheat wella.

If you didn't check that na long thing she go put you o

serious long thing that person will put you!

Is good to check ya partner phone and let her too check our phone so that more trust between the two will flow very well

As for me, I be snoop doggy dog for that matter. Humans are dynamic in nature.... Snooping saves you the stress of future palava.

In my opinion, there shouldn't be need for this if there is maturity,trust and love. Unfortunately, what we now have is failing marriages as a result of these factors vi mentioned which is why partners snoop

why would a man tell his wife not to touch his phone,his wife!! is that not the foundation of mistrust. If there's nothing to hide both partners should be able to use each others phone.Because of insincerity,deceit,lies,cheating with exes etc partners do this.
Some say they want to protect their wives from finding out things that would hurt or destroy them, the real question is WHY DO SOMEHIING IN THR FIRST PLACE THAT YOU KNOW WOULD HURT OR DESTROY? and try to keep it a secret later??

If u suspect any foul play,u can check your partners phone,and be prepared for the worst

I have never done so and will not do so. Because, I don't have the time to waste on such things. Humans worry a lot over many things. Many lovers and couples are immature and insecure. Fears of being cheated and hurt are the main reasons. The only thing I fear about my partner cheating on me is infection and transmission of bad blood from sleeping with others I don't know. I have seen a woman who died from AIDS contracted from her cheating husband and he also later died from AIDS and made their innocent children orphans. Then one medical doctor who was cheating on his wife gave her pubic lice from the housemaid he was sleeping with. Only idiots and fools don't consider the horrible and terrible consequences of cheating. Do you know that the sexual history of a young woman was traced back from 2007 to the 1940s with her blood? Her sex chain connected to her sex partners and their own sex partners and the sex partners of those sex partners until results ended up with a man who was in the 1940s. The sex chain of your girlfriend and wife can include IBB and OBJ from promiscuity. When we say cheating is dangerous and deadly, we don't refer only to that one sex partner or two sex partners you have slept with to cheat on your partner, but what you connected to in the sex chain of legions of others and the transmission of sperm in the blood stream. A cheating woman may end up having a child with a DNA linking to Stalin or Idi Amin. That is why you can have children looking like half caste when you and your partner are black. You will rush to accuse your partner of cheating and your partner is innocent. But the link is from either parents, grand parents, great grand parents and ancestors over the decades and centuries. Now you understand the curse of the Original Sin from Adam and Eve and why Jesus Christ had to shed his precious innocent blood to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. That is why God condemns fornication and adultery, because both make lovers and couples to sleep with several sex partners in a sex chain that will link to thousands of generations from the past to the future.

nkemdi89:

You sef no use the m word on somebody e no good be cos you no dey feed that person, even if sef you dey feed am e no good to call person that kain yamayama name.

Well well let's leave that for anoda day. Is imo ya state?

Sometimes its not really advisable bc anybdy dat want to cheat wil surely do it irrespective of ur search , and dat is y is good to be becareful wen it coms to choosing life partner ,if u take time to study ur partner well u wl knw if she/he is a cheating type