₦airaland Forum

Lightening:
I am only teaching you life lessons. You desperately need it going by your posts which make you strike me as one of such carefree entities that pay little attention to the principles of life but will start screaming the devil when the evil consequences of their actions come calling.

chiefolododo:
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

chiefolododo:
RUN FOR YOUR LIFE

nnamdibig:
If you are not ready to be like the man you saw, its time to move on. Because your fiancé will be taking advice from her mum.

on are second thought, if you have really decided to marry the girl, then go and spend some times with the man. am sure he will have something to tell you. at least you hear his own side of the story.

19naia:
I know the man may have abused them in the past, but the issue is that they still hold to punishing him and relish in it to an extent that has become them with a likely sense of power and conquering over all men of the world.
This means that they are so accustomed to and embellished in treating men like that and believeing that men are abusers who must be pusnished.
They will pathologically take this approach now to all men that come to be a close part of their home and way of being. As soon as there is conflict of any small measure between you and fiancee, she will fall back on her training and experience with how to handle men at home and of what merit to give men. Her mom has exposed her to that as her primary way.

They will have the same in store for you at any sign of the smallest friction. They will never change until they can change with the man they have now at home and change to make deep ammends all around. Its not just deep wounds they have festering in their home, but the proverbial knife is still in the wound and they are digging it in deeper rather than pulling it out for healing. Why would you join such a circus of madness?

Run now before they use you like a donkey and mentally restrain you to resignation into whatever fate they determine over you.

Run now before they drive you mad to the point of waking to slaughter them in the night, like the goats they are.

Leave and don't look back because those are women who have learned to hate men yet never learned to overcome their desire for men.
They want to be kings without the independence and strength to be such, so they look for a man to walk all over for the image of strength and power.
A man cannot prosper in life beside a woman who does not have the substance to encourage and support prosperity in her man partner.

Be wise and don't cost yourself a browsing of hell in life before you die. No amount of prayer or hope will help you if you deliver yourself to them . Its them who need prayer and hope, so let them be and pray for them in hope -at a safe distance. Spawn of Medusa who will turn any man to stone. Spawn of Medusa, cursed by God himself and not a favor he would solve just for you just because of a little prayer. You will suffer and risk to life and limb with them... And risk to sanity with them.

Run. Its better to be alone, free and safer than to be locked down to Spawn of Medusa.

They crucified Jesus and Jesus came back not to punish, but to forgive and save souls. That woman is the opposite. She was never killed but she has a home-made hell she is enjoying being the master of, in her house as if she is the devil himself. They will only be happy to add you to the flames. They could just forgive and forget the man and let him go, but they have learned to enjoy making hell for him. It has entered their blood now and will be their personality until they can forgive, forget and let him go with no interest in making anybody suffer.

sammily:
Please I want people to help me out here. I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 months last 2 week ago and we agreed to visit her home last Sunday. I have always dropped her off around the place but I have never entered the house because I wasn't yet ready to meet the parent because we were just dating then and I wasn't yet sure that she was the one for me. Meanwhile all these while, My girl was only referring to her mum so I subconsciously concluded that the father is late. So last Sunday, I got to their house at Agege pen Cinema and what I saw was very sad. I saw a man looking so haggard in the sitting room and I greeted him, He answered in a very low tone and welcomed me. My girls mum soon came out to the sitting room and also greeted me. We exchanged pleasantries before my girl came out to join us in the discuss. At a point my girls mum brought out money and asked the haggard man to go and buy fuel to power the generator for me so that Heat will not disturb me.

We discussed at length after the man left. To cut the long story short, After the meeting we fixed another date for the second meeting that I was supposed to attend with a family member. When I was about leaving, I gave them some money and some to the man and he fell on his knees thanking me as if he has never owned N1000 in his entire life. When my girl was seeing me off, I asked her who the man was and lo and behold, it was her father. I couldn't believe my ears. it was like a rude joke. it was unbelievable. She must has sensed my confusion before she started telling me stories of how the man maltreated her mum when he had money, how he married another wife who squandered all his money and left them in penury. She said he used to beat her mum and all sorts which I cannot write here.

Since that Sunday till now, I've had no peace of mind, I've been thinking and imagining how a right thinking woman and her daughter can comfortably relegate the man of the house to a mere houseboy. That Sunday, the man was wearing a torn knicker and a white singlet that I won't even use to clean my car. Even my wife to be hushed him down when he came back and wanted to keep the fuel change to himself. Something is wrong somewhere, a woman who could treat her husband like this no matter what he did in the past is scary. I have not even picked her calls since that Sunday evening. I am scared and I don't know what to do next.

deltateam:
I concur! Op please I mean well for you. If your fiancee can treat her own father with that much disdain I wonder how your own case would be after marriage. They may turn you to a vegetable.

You will be cut off from your family. Your own nah to dey answer dem yes Mas!

Babzilla:
What are you pple saying?
the man is is only reapibg the fruits of his bullshit
Its a simple case of payback.
Pls if she is caring go ahead and marry her

sammily:
Please I want people to help me out here. I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 months last 2 week ago and we agreed to visit her home last Sunday. I have always dropped her off around the place but I have never entered the house because I wasn't yet ready to meet the parent because we were just dating then and I wasn't yet sure that she was the one for me. Meanwhile all these while, My girl was only referring to her mum so I subconsciously concluded that the father is late. So last Sunday, I got to their house at Agege pen Cinema and what I saw was very sad. I saw a man looking so haggard in the sitting room and I greeted him, He answered in a very low tone and welcomed me. My girls mum soon came out to the sitting room and also greeted me. We exchanged pleasantries before my girl came out to join us in the discuss. At a point my girls mum brought out money and asked the haggard man to go and buy fuel to power the generator for me so that Heat will not disturb me.

We discussed at length after the man left. To cut the long story short, After the meeting we fixed another date for the second meeting that I was supposed to attend with a family member. When I was about leaving, I gave them some money and some to the man and he fell on his knees thanking me as if he has never owned N1000 in his entire life. When my girl was seeing me off, I asked her who the man was and lo and behold, it was her father. I couldn't believe my ears. it was like a rude joke. it was unbelievable. She must has sensed my confusion before she started telling me stories of how the man maltreated her mum when he had money, how he married another wife who squandered all his money and left them in penury. She said he used to beat her mum and all sorts which I cannot write here.

Since that Sunday till now, I've had no peace of mind, I've been thinking and imagining how a right thinking woman and her daughter can comfortably relegate the man of the house to a mere houseboy. That Sunday, the man was wearing a torn knicker and a white singlet that I won't even use to clean my car. Even my wife to be hushed him down when he came back and wanted to keep the fuel change to himself. Something is wrong somewhere, a woman who could treat her husband like this no matter what he did in the past is scary. I have not even picked her calls since that Sunday evening. I am scared and I don't know what to do next.

baby124:
Look, no man can mistreat me and my children and even find my address when he is desperate ok? Her mother even tried giving him shelter. So after he must have abandoned them for ashawo and the mother did anything to raise her kids, she should now accept the cursed being into her life to keep eating her food and living from her sweat so he can resume carrying ashawo. Such things can never even happen in my home because my husband after messing up knows he cannot come back to tell me any story.

Don't change your ways, continue... The one wey go meet you for front de wait you? Small mistake you say? You call abandoning your family for another woman a small mistake Why did he go back to who he treated badly? Are his girlfriends all dead?

Some of you talk of conscience but do things to other's you cannot take. This man is reaping the fruits of his wickedness and you are talking to me about someone's conscience being dead? Is it not your conscience that is dead? For you to call such a big issue a mistake? Women should fear you! Leave your name, date of birth, photo and address so women can run from you!

E no go beta for the man we go do me or my daughters this kind thing. Thunder, lightening, brimstone! Sangoooo!!!

Jamean:
Hmmm!
This story brings back a lot of memories.
Oh! Life!

But as much as it takes the grace of God to forgive, if they won't forgive him genuinely for the past they should let him go.

sammily:
Please I want people to help me out here. I proposed to my girlfriend of 8 months last 2 week ago and we agreed to visit her home last Sunday. I have always dropped her off around the place but I have never entered the house because I wasn't yet ready to meet the parent because we were just dating then and I wasn't yet sure that she was the one for me. Meanwhile all these while, My girl was only referring to her mum so I subconsciously concluded that the father is late. So last Sunday, I got to their house at Agege pen Cinema and what I saw was very sad. I saw a man looking so haggard in the sitting room and I greeted him, He answered in a very low tone and welcomed me. My girls mum soon came out to the sitting room and also greeted me. We exchanged pleasantries before my girl came out to join us in the discuss. At a point my girls mum brought out money and asked the haggard man to go and buy fuel to power the generator for me so that Heat will not disturb me.

We discussed at length after the man left. To cut the long story short, After the meeting we fixed another date for the second meeting that I was supposed to attend with a family member. When I was about leaving, I gave them some money and some to the man and he fell on his knees thanking me as if he has never owned N1000 in his entire life. When my girl was seeing me off, I asked her who the man was and lo and behold, it was her father. I couldn't believe my ears. it was like a rude joke. it was unbelievable. She must has sensed my confusion before she started telling me stories of how the man maltreated her mum when he had money, how he married another wife who squandered all his money and left them in penury. She said he used to beat her mum and all sorts which I cannot write here.

Since that Sunday till now, I've had no peace of mind, I've been thinking and imagining how a right thinking woman and her daughter can comfortably relegate the man of the house to a mere houseboy. That Sunday, the man was wearing a torn knicker and a white singlet that I won't even use to clean my car. Even my wife to be hushed him down when he came back and wanted to keep the fuel change to himself. Something is wrong somewhere, a woman who could treat her husband like this no matter what he did in the past is scary. I have not even picked her calls since that Sunday evening. I am scared and I don't know what to do next.

harsysky:
[b]Dear Op,
My comment may not actually make sense to anyone, but I don't care. I'm writing directly to you Op because you've come here for a solution. I've also read a lot of people's comments, especially the " run for your life!"

I would have easily said you should run, but come to think of it, "No one is perfect".
You ain't, Op, no matter how sympathetic and sensitive you may think you are. That girl of yours may have undergone series of assaults or brain-wiring that most or some of us have also undergone, Only that hers might have gotten into her so , so much. It may not be her fault actually. Be rest assured she can come of it and love like never before.

I like you a lot Op. Your sense of care and observation, I respect so much. You never can tell if you would have acted more than your wife-to-be if you were in her shoes. Leaving her and not picking her calls means one thing to me. You wana be those kind of people who know how to deal with a problem but leave it because they respect people's say more than theirs.
Talk to your girl. Atleast, there is something you've seen in her that has attracted you to her. Assuming you didn't see her Dad, you wouldn't be here complaining, right? Don't think the next person you will meet will be that saint. You could save that family. The head of that family might have done something anyone could even kill him for ,but I believe they still feed him atleast. It means there is still 1% love for the old man. They can still love him to the fullest but need to be convinced that one does not pay evil with evil otherwise evil will be in circulation.

I can never forget the advice my aunt gave me one precious day. I was having a problem with my Dad. I was thinking he never loved me. Then , the auto-correct advice came and it goes thus: " the only man who hates you is one who shuts you out all round. Does your Dad shut you out?". " No" I replied
"Then he loves you more than anything" she concluded

I believed her whole-heartedly. she is now my mentor.
[/b]

iwadobo:
Best comment so far. He should call her and tell her why he is quiting . He should advise her to change her ways so that this kind of break up won't happen to her in the future. That advice will go a long way to restructuring the family . After such discussion, the guy should try as much as possible not to have any contact with the girl, because he could be charmed and that will be disastrous.

iPopAlomo:
You think say free cocoa get sense...? that girl nah cow...

AuroraB:
One on one chat bawo In that house or where? And to further risk the man's life at the hands of this evil two
Even leaving this relationship needs a lot of smartness from OP

AuroraB:
One on one chat bawo In that house or where? And to further risk the man's life at the hands of this evil two
Even leaving this relationship needs a lot of smartness from OP

brightguru:
What if its a test? The man is actually their house boy

0ubenji:
Hmm..why do I av dis strange feelin u r the OP's fiancee in questn...

repogirl:
That family put the dysfunction in dysfunctional. OP, run faster than your legs can take you...... your instinct is on point.

obiak4:
Pinky are you poundering what am poundering?

Oma307:
The truth is the man has been charm by the woman, a right thinking woman will not do that in front of a visitor, bro u have been adviced to run but i will say u should sprint for ur dear life because i believe the lady is also aware of it

obiak4:
The dude is a smart guy should be able to figure it out just hang AROUND when he is sent on erands since he is the houseboy lure him with goodies bingo!!!!!!!!
You can get all you want from him and he will never spill the beans it called social engineering
The dude is a smart guy should be able to figure it out just hang AROUND when he is sent on erands since he is the houseboy lure him with goodies bingo!!!!!!!!
You can get all you want from him and he will never spill the beans it called social engineering
The dude is a smart guy should be able to figure it out just hang AROUND when he is sent on erands since he is the houseboy lure him with goodies bingo!!!!!!!!
You can get all you want from him and he will never spill the beans it called social engineering

freecocoa:
OP, while I don't support anyone being maltreated, you can't rule out everything your woman said because believe me you, I know a family like that back in the uni.

The man used to maltreat his wife and kids when he had some change, when things changed, the woman didn't forgive him, ergo did things to show him she was bitter at him, blah blah blah.

It's not news that some men are worse than the mythical devil when they have money, so you need to be sure before taking any decision, it's hard to know that your father maltreated your mum and still be nice to him.