₦airaland Forum

summerflame:
Took my gf to cinema 2 days ago, then to the zoological garden, to the Chinese restaurant. Imagine my gf, she told me point blank that the money I spent on her that day is too much and it's like wasting money that we should learn how to economize, next day, she went into the kitchen and cook my favorite from her purse. That's how relationship should be

gedtalks:
My people pleaseeee I need sincere advise here. Your advise will definitely guide me on the next step to take.

There is a beautiful girl I've been considering getting married to, but the way she requests money and fast food is making her look very ... lol.. "hungry" and opportunistic to me. The values she sees in a man seem to me like its basically what he will BUY for her. I confess that I made matters worse initially by "fast fooding" each time we meet... Now I think she sees me like a free lunch at crunchies. If I call her in the afternoon, she says I'm hungry.. its so irritating now.. in fact I lost a lot of regards for her..but she doesn't know yet.

Recently she asked me for some money and I refused very politely..she said she was "disappointed".

I wonder if she even loves any other thing about me asides the MONEY I WILL GIVE HER. she pays ABSOLUTELY NO attention the things I want her to see in me...like level of maturity, my leadership skills, I taught she was just being childish, but lately I discovered its just her nature. her ideology about a guy is WHAT WILL I GET FROM HIM.. I might dump her .. i wont even talk to her about it. please advise me

dollyjoy:
They probably request for money that way because you presented the image of a wealthy guy before then, to impress i think!

jahsson:
Sighted... Uve heard millions now all ur antenna don stand...

Billyonaire:
Keep on fast-fooding her naw. Why you wan stop ?

claremont:
Modern society requires that both a man and a woman make financial contributions to make the relationship work. It might not be equal financial contributions, but there has to be some contribution from the lady other than the traditional roles of "the kitchen and the other room". If women do not want men to see them as slaves and sex objects, they have to make tangible contribution.

However, there are some men who actually prefer females that stick to the traditional roles. I think different people look out for different things.

dicksonadams:
dislike women like this, they think they are all intellectual and shiy but just like the rest of em

gedtalks:
My people pleaseeee I need sincere advise here. Your advise will definitely guide me on the next step to take.

There is a beautiful girl I've been considering getting married to, but the way she requests money and fast food is making her look very ... lol.. "hungry" and opportunistic to me. The values she sees in a man seem to me like its basically what he will BUY for her. I confess that I made matters worse initially by "fast fooding" each time we meet... Now I think she sees me like a free lunch at crunchies. If I call her in the afternoon, she says I'm hungry.. its so irritating now.. in fact I lost a lot of regards for her..but she doesn't know yet.

Recently she asked me for some money and I refused very politely..she said she was "disappointed".

I wonder if she even loves any other thing about me asides the MONEY I WILL GIVE HER. she pays ABSOLUTELY NO attention the things I want her to see in me...like level of maturity, my leadership skills, I taught she was just being childish, but lately I discovered its just her nature. her ideology about a guy is WHAT WILL I GET FROM HIM.. I might dump her .. i wont even talk to her about it. please advise me

tunjilana:
I love the way you are being specific...shows you want genuine answers.

Firstly I do not believe the african society(at least my part) teaches a woman to loose everything about herself for the man. And it has nothing to do with civilization, In my part of Nigeria, even before the white man set foot here, women are known as pillars of free enterprise. Marketing and trade was their core. You here things like Iyaloja,Iyalaje et al and mothers even groom daughters to engage in trade and business once they are matured enough. In those days, men were polygamous and mainly gave their wives a fair and reasonable share of what they have, the women often supplement from earnings from trade and other endeavors. My great grand mother was like this likewise my grand mother

Now talking about these days, with education et al, do you seriously think a man will put his daughter through school and possibly even spend more on her(cos the girl child often gets more resources than the boy when growing up, my sisters got what they want while my own small request is always screened ) just so she can pack up? Check the lady topping your class and doing well academically, she obviously won't finish school to pack up...I sincerely believe every woman that packs up for a man never really had plans for a great life. Times changed and a lot of middle class families have diverse ways of managing family while both still earn.A house help on a wage can cook, clean, wash while the woman does something flexible enough to support finance and still have time to instill values in the children.

Simply put a man respects an empowered and level-headed woman...They are assets no man jokes with

mylove4God:
Please try discussing with her. Let her know how her actions makes you feel. Her response and reaction will let you know what next step to take. She might not know what she is actually doing is wrong. Talk to her and let her know how you feel about it before thinking of breaking up with her. It's better you let her know you feel now that there is still relationship, than when you have broken up the relationship. You never can tell, you might be saving her from more mistakes.

favourmic:
Tell her to Come forward! Come! Come! She should not be afraid, What is happening to her eh! It's not ordinary oh! God has remembered her today... Oyaa raise your hand up... Raise it up very well! Then bend it and place it on your head... Preferably where your mind tells you your brain is located... your stomach or your head. Then repeat this prayer after me... *My father! My father* Where ever they have buried my sense and my brain... *In my maternal village* *In my paternal village* *in the coven* Let them Vomit it now! Oya start shouting it with anger ! Shooooooouuuuuuut it

IamMissMarvel:
You are dating a girl and not a woman. Shikenan.

A woman would use the money you would have spent on fast food to cook you two or three different small portioned soups.

As a means of your appreciation, you'll buy her gifts even without her demanding it.

Most fast food and gifts demanding girls are unemployed so the only means to having their way is with men who are drooling after them.

Who fine geh help? Marry a woman who will add value to your life first, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally and finamcially by helping u save.

That one no mean say u go be aradite o. No woman wants to marry a stingy man or one who can't maintain her standard or improve it.

lestat:
Good evening all, this is Lestat once again.. and this time I bring to you another putrid , vomit inducing post!
Posts created by a subset of a subset of nauseating emotional man-boys! No I don't mean your regular still living with mummy and daddy 30 something year old baby daddy's..no. these are even worse than those these are a lower subset of angry , delusional , masturbators who belong to a wretched. Disgusting pit of fvck!
Did you just read this sh1t?
Do you all put yourselves through the torture of reading this poorly worded rant of a weakling attention wh0re of a man boy?
The OP deserves to be alone and sad for this garbage he made us read.
Shame on you OP. No pints for your id1ocy!
Go to bed and rethink your life.
No one wants to read your pathetic post because it's an insult to intelligence and imagination

gedtalks:
My people pleaseeee I need sincere advise here. Your advise will definitely guide me on the next step to take.

There is a beautiful girl I've been considering getting married to, but the way she requests money and fast food is making her look very ... lol.. "hungry" and opportunistic to me. The values she sees in a man seem to me like its basically what he will BUY for her. I confess that I made matters worse initially by "fast fooding" each time we meet... Now I think she sees me like a free lunch at crunchies. If I call her in the afternoon, she says I'm hungry.. its so irritating now.. in fact I lost a lot of regards for her..but she doesn't know yet.

Recently she asked me for some money and I refused very politely..she said she was "disappointed".

I wonder if she even loves any other thing about me asides the MONEY I WILL GIVE HER. she pays ABSOLUTELY NO attention the things I want her to see in me...like level of maturity, my leadership skills, I taught she was just being childish, but lately I discovered its just her nature. her ideology about a guy is WHAT WILL I GET FROM HIM.. I might dump her .. i wont even talk to her about it. please advise me

Izen:
I have one honest question for men tho. What else do you really have to offer in a relationship besides finance? Most women have been taught to lose every thing about themselves for the man they love since childhood. The only compensation they've been taught to expect is in terms of finance. So if men hate providing in this generation, what else do they really have to offer?
I'm asking it maybe because it beats me when I hear thing like this especially on Nairaland. It's like no one even values the role women play again. I keep imagining how I would have turned out if my mum didn't have to wake up early to prepare me for school, make breakfast, wash my clothes, care for me when sick, carry me about etc while I was growing up. She was a major part of my growing up years and I loved it. And she did all her wifely duties at the same time. But now, it seems the world doesn't think that's enough unless she contributes financially. Ironically, she does contribute more than enough and that makes her the super woman I don't want to be. Because all I see is her giving and giving and giving. Giving her time, her strength, her self, her money. It must get tiring at some point and I see the stress in her face. It hurts that I had to see my mum cry this year because of the stress of money which shouldn't be her burden.
Anyway, back to my question, honestly if men are not bearing the burden of finance, what else do they have to offer in a relationship/marriage? Is this new ideology of a woman must contribute financially justified or is it due to laziness and lack of responsibility of this generation of men?

gedtalks:
Thanks bro.. but she calls me often on phone.. and feels bad when I don't call.

veekybaby:
please dump her and come to me # Shebi she doesn't want to be wise neh#....

gedtalks:
Thanks bro.. but she calls me often on phone.. and feels bad when I don't call.

IamMissMarvel:
You are dating a girl and not a woman. Shikenan.

A woman would use the money you would have spent on fast food to cook you two or three different small portioned soups.

As a means of your appreciation, you'll buy her gifts even without her demanding it.

Most fast food and gifts demanding girls are unemployed so the only means to having their way is with men who are drooling after them.

Who fine geh help? Marry a woman who will add value to your life first, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally and finamcially by helping u save.

That one no mean say u go be aradite o. No woman wants to marry a stingy man or one who can't maintain her standard or improve it.

veekybaby:
please dump her and come to me # Shebi she doesn't want to be wise neh#....

IamMissMarvel:
You are dating a girl and not a woman. Shikenan.

A woman would use the money you would have spent on fast food to cook you two or three different small portioned soups.

As a means of your appreciation, you'll buy her gifts even without her demanding it.

Most fast food and gifts demanding girls are unemployed so the only means to having their way is with men who are drooling after them.

Who fine geh help? Marry a woman who will add value to your life first, spiritually, intellectually, emotionally and finamcially by helping u save.

That one no mean say u go be aradite o. No woman wants to marry a stingy man or one who can't maintain her standard or improve it.

gedtalks:
My people pleaseeee I need sincere advise here. Your advise will definitely guide me on the next step to take.

There is a beautiful girl I've been considering getting married to, but the way she requests money and fast food is making her look very ... lol.. "hungry" and opportunistic to me. The values she sees in a man seem to me like its basically what he will BUY for her. I confess that I made matters worse initially by "fast fooding" each time we meet... Now I think she sees me like a free lunch at crunchies. If I call her in the afternoon, she says I'm hungry.. its so irritating now.. in fact I lost a lot of regards for her..but she doesn't know yet.

Recently she asked me for some money and I refused very politely..she said she was "disappointed".

I wonder if she even loves any other thing about me asides the MONEY I WILL GIVE HER. she pays ABSOLUTELY NO attention the things I want her to see in me...like level of maturity, my leadership skills, I taught she was just being childish, but lately I discovered its just her nature. her ideology about a guy is WHAT WILL I GET FROM HIM.. I might dump her .. i wont even talk to her about it. please advise me

hopeforcharles:
are u no that guy that talked about the Pyramid issh? Men u are subconsciously in my memory, hope u haven't given up on educating us.

Izen:
Lol, you've still not answered my question. If I'm providing for myself, what else will I gain from being married please? If we're being realistic, we would both agree that every relationship involves giving and taking at some point. So what will I have to gain from my husband if I'm taking care of myself by myself. Good d.I.c.k?
And when you say a man respects an empowered and level-headed woman, does it mean men don't appreciate the roles their mothers played in their lives besides finance? If they do, why then do they judge their mothers and potential wives differently? And does it also mean that men hate confident women? You know being confident and being proud can be easily misinterpreted as it usually is in most cases. And why is it okay for men to be confident but not women?
Finally, this is a personal question for you. Do you believe in gender roles?

ollah1:
Which zoological garden did you take her to and u mind telling us the experience? Btw you got yourself a wonderful chic

NaMe4:
LOL. Bro, I've come to realize that's a general mentality in this part of the world-even with the male folks!
Someone's appearance dictates how wealthy he is! Hehehehehehehe

zameena:
seems like it sometimes. I dated a guy who was cheating on me with a girl he made me believe was his sister. Infact anytime she is around he still comes to my place to eat or makes me prepare soup and stew and keep for him. The day I. Found out I almost vanished from earth.

Billyonaire:
Looking like I will stop educating on those things. People hardly come to class. Seems people are interested in materialism only. I will probably teach them out to make money from nothing but ideas.