SAMBARRY:
when popsi was threatening me with I won't pay your school fees,I.won't give you pocket money,back then at 19 or so,I said no problem na,don't give me.if YOU don't give me there are thousands of guys that Will give me (it's a LIE o,na just shakara.I didn't mean it) Shebi if they ask me why I didn't go to school,I will say it's you that didn't pay my school fees,let's see who will get the insult.

Babe,my pocket MONEY dry enter steady,till I finished school and even when I was at home those days and they sometimes forget themselves by calling me unsavory names,I remind them that daddy you can pass your message across without insults.it's not until you insult me,I will do what you want

Since that time till I left the house even as a young girl,if I serve popsi food,he will tell me,thank you,when he wants to send me errand he will say so with respect,e.g please help me do this,not come here,fool,etc typical of how parents insult their daughters.it's you that will train them on how to talk to you,adress you etc

You think African parents care about your age if you don't deliver yourself?lol

I remember my cousin who her dad slapped on her wedding day inside the car in the presence of guests where her husband's friend acted as the driver for that day.that's how disrespectful and disregardful for your feelings or age they can be,if you don't set boundaries now.

That day I was just looking very irritated but in my mind I was laughing because I know they have so basterdized and mumunized her that she can't do anything about it.

Ur father was a civilian..mine was a soldier..
Come nd tell him how to run ur life nd u wee know difference between sprite and water

From your write-up, I think the issue is not the church, but your dad's behavior.

I have been in this church all through. And I have not seen the righteous forsaken nor her seed, begging bread.

I would suggest to you to build your relationship around Christ and nor religiosity. Be open to God's will and direction. #JustSaying

Alexas58:

Ur father was a civilian..mine was a soldier..
Come nd tell him how to run ur life nd u wee know difference between sprite and water

Hahahah
This got me.
Mine, a retired soldier.

Dont disobey him while under his roof. It will break his heart. Look for apartment far from home and then go to where u want.

emerged01:

Payback is near. You may later see reason your dad was trying to guard you but then it maybe too late. If you are old enough,you need to be under your roof to do what you feel like doing.

You don't have to reason this way...
Salvation is a personal affair. You choose for yourself what you want. There's no Payback in this. Parents should only advice and not direct our spiritual life.
Her father will only be worried because he thinks she will quickly jump into another church that will mislead her. But if that happens, it's his own fault, because as a pastor, he should have taught her daughter all the truths she needs to know so that no other person or church can mislead her.

Sister the issue is with with you, let me quote you "pastors children are wayward". That's the issue sister, not your father nor the church. Thanks.

SAMBARRY:
hi luvable sam.so you're still on nl and you didn't ask after me abi

And to your comment EVERY family member is an architect to every child's LIFE.but I'm sure the prostitutes touts and pickpockets don't have family members that are architect to the child's LIFE.continue deceiving yourself.

Ever heard every man is responsible for his success or failure in life?

Anyway op you're the owner of your cross.na you know where the shoe dey pinch you,so do whatever you want to do.it's not your life anyway,it's your parent's.you're just a spectator

Ma binu...i barely comment on posts here....How is Wuraola?...

emerged01:

Payback is near. You may later see reason your dad was trying to guard you but then it maybe too late. If you are old enough,you need to be under your roof to do what you feel like doing.

I'm under my own roof and make my own decisions

There are somethings that put me off about African parenting.You use your power and authority or financial influence over that child to make him do your bidding e.g threatening him with school fees and pocket money to make him attend a certain church or live a certain life.

Have you asked yourself one day when you don't have that power of influence over that child,what happens to all the lifestyle you were forcing him to live?

You should be asking yourself is my son or daughter acting OR she is actually turning out the way I wanted

What happened to all the rappers now.many of them where forced to be in the choir as kids and teenagers by their parents,but that wasn't what they wanted.now their parents don't have that power over them again,what happens?

Are you training your child to be a good actor to satisfy you ? What happens when he leaves your roof.a parent should use impact rather than coercion.coercion usually turns the kids to good actors and then become opposite of what their parents instilled in them

So why then is the essence of training your child when you know that as soon as you have no power over him again,all the values will enter thrash can

luvablesam:


Ma binu...i barely comment on posts here....How is Wuraola?....i sent you a DM just now...kindly reply

my dear I don't know how to accept dms o.I have been having challenge with it o.How are you anyway?

Flourishh:
The thing is, I'm 24 and I'm done with school, done with Nysc, and I'm working at the moment. I'm still living under his roof.
But the whole pressure is still there and I find it hard to leave the church since I'm a pastor's daughter.

Hard one. As an ex deeperlifer and also a parent, leaving the church can be difficult as the members have been programmed to believe that members who leave the church are backsliders or on their way to hellfire.

You can go to church with your parents while watching yourself in the home and waiting for that day when you will finally be free.

Deeperlife is bondage.

emerged01:

Payback is near. You may later see reason your dad was trying to guard you but then it maybe too late. If you are old enough,you need to be under your roof to do what you feel like doiing.

Excuse me.... What do u mean by payback in this situation.... Is a kind of pay back attached to changing church.... I think we serve d same God....
My only point on this issue is dat the lady in question sud not use dis Avenue of changing church to backslide in fate and faith

Alexas58:

Ur father was a civilian..mine was a soldier..
Come nd tell him how to run ur life nd u wee know difference between sprite and water

mshrew


THERE are many ways to enter mile 2 .meaning there are many ways to achieve your aim with African parents even if he's the lion of the tribe of sambisia forest

The truth is do you really want to leave home? If yes, the way to do that isnt hard. U already have a job. Start looking for a new place to stay. One day, tell ur parents that u r moving out. Tell them u want to live on ur own. U want to learn to survive nd take care of urself, be mature about it. Make sure u have paid nd u know how to organize urself to survive. Remember, once u move out, u dnt want to move back in. Make that decision and stick to it. I dnt support the point of waiting till u get married or you will lose it b4 then. Go nd get what you want. Life is waay too short to keep regreting.

shadeyinka:

I understand you well.

However, as long as you are under his roof and dependent upon him for sustainance, you are required to be obedient to his rules.

That is the Christlike way.

Max, five years, you are married. Then you can do anything you want

So if one of his rules included attending a hare krishna temple, she should be Christ like and attend with her father ??

Hypocrites !!

iceadonis:


Excuse me.... What do u mean by payback in this situation.... Is a kind of pay back attached to changing church.... I think we serve d same God....
My only point on this issue is dat the lady in question sud not use dis Avenue of changing church to backslide in fate and faith

my own grouse and reason for annoyance is why do churches rival with themselves yet they claim to be worshipping God.they will say haaa don't go to Anglican,there are witches there,Methodist is a church for wizards and other stupid things like that

Einl:
Be honest and open with him. Tell him how you feel. Tell him your mind. Cry, so he will see your emotions.

And when you finally leave, don't go to a nonsense church. Find a nice Catholic or Anglican church.

Did she tell you that she needs suggestions as to which church she should go next after she leaves deeper life? What do you mean by she should find a nice Catholic or Anglican Church? Catholic Church na church? I'd rather be a deeper lifer for 10 years than to be a Catholic for one day.

debolayinka:
Most people here got their responses triggered when they saw "Deeper Life".
Sis, do you know God beyond what your parents and church have always taught you? You don't have to leave the church, neither do you need to leave home to gain freedom. Dialogue with your dad on a good day will solve this problem.

Although, we don't know if you also have unpleasant habits that makes your dad relate with you that way.

But her dad who is a so called deeperlifer has ANGER ISSUES, how about your HOLY church deliver him from the spirit of ANGER ?

ZionG:
It's not all about getting married and leaving what when you get married and your husband wants same thing would you leave the marriage no... I am also a deeperlifer but I attend christ Embassy while I'm in school and also at home when my dad isn't around once he's in the house it's deeper life you could be attending your church and his church while still under his roof but firstly obey your parents my dad is aware I go to christ Embassy but when leaving a church pray first that God should direct you to the right place by his spirit right now my dad has come to agree with me my dad was part of the first 70 members in deeperlife if you go to the right church the lines would fall in pleasant places for you

You're a glorious coward

Bostin:
What a perfect topic at the right time. Before now I used to see Deeper life people as the only saint going to heaven not until I married there daughter. Am feeling hell as I type now with a woman born and raised in Deeper life though she claimed she now attend RCCG. My father inlaw is late before I met my wife and the mother must compulsory remarried at age of 55yrs. Anytime I have issues with my wife as she's stubborn type,when her mum heard about it,she will claimed is because we don't attend Deeper life marriage committee that is why we are having issues. Instead to give my wife moral instructions when things happen,she always condemn her and get my wife more frustrated and confused, now my wife has left home with her mum's support. When I asked the mother where is my wife,she said my wife has gone to search for work, I asked where but she refused to tell me. Mother inlaw even said no man can stop her from her work not even her husband when alive.

Lesson learn ; they only worship doctrine not the true word of God.

100% right.

They worship their GO and his doctrines.

Different strokes.

After 10 years outside Deeper Life Church, I'm looking for ways to get back.

Well lady it's your choice, I left when I was attending one of the DL churches where things were not done properly.

Believe me, I am regretting my action.

Find a Deeper Life Church that you are comfortable with.

It's like you know, Anglicans are not all same, same with Catholics, Baptists etc.

Personally, I just want to get back to DL, the issue now is how do I leave my present choir master post without causing bad blood, or hurting my present church leaders.

Akinaukwa:
Am sorry i picked holes in what you said. I personally seen ladies born and brought up in Deeper Life getting married outside the church. Has anyone turned up for marriage and your parents rejected him cos of church stuff. Check up your life very well, something is wrong with it . I may not also blame your dad. Pastors children are supposed to live an exemplary life. Churches like Deeper Life discipline their Pastors for their wards wayward behaviour. Thus the strictness some of them employ in child training. Being a matured adult, talk things over with your dad and i believe he will see things wt you.

THOU HYPOCRITE, something is not wrong with her, something is very wrong with her dad, did you actually read this excerpt from her opening statement; "he has serious temper issues that makes him say things that gets me, my mum and siblings angry"

Her dad has SERIOUS TEMPER ISSUES and he is making their lives miserable, yet he is a DEEPER LIFER ?? But then again , is that not the spirit of DEEPERLIFE, harsh, intolerant and oppressive.

JusticeSeeker:
My Sister, there is no Church in Heaven. Provided you've not backslided and your relationship with God is intact, go to where you feel you will serve God happily. I'm of the Deeper Life stock too. I left another living Church for Deeper Life because I was more comfortable with their Christian comportment after I was saved from the world. Think about this posers.
Why am I leaving Deeper life?
1. Because of their administrative rules and regulations which Baba Kumuyi now calls non-essentials? Good luck to you.
3. Is it because of their Bible doctrinal stand? Then ask God for a renewal and He will grant you.

..This sounds sarcastic... Or I m I just feeling it?

iceadonis:


Excuse me.... What do u mean by payback in this situation.... Is a kind of pay back attached to changing church.... I think we serve d same God....
My only point on this issue is dat the lady in question sud not use dis Avenue of changing church to backslide in fate and faith

You go fear emotional manipulation na.

That is what all this people tend to do to people who want freedom.

Flourishh:
As we all know, many people believe the children of pastors are mostly wayward.
I for example, I'm a female and my dad is a pastor in Deeper life Bible Church and trust me I've been looking for ways to leave the church. My dad isn't even helping matters, he has serious temper issues that makes him say things that gets me, my mum and siblings angry. I really do not see myself getting married in his church. Please tell me if I'm doing the right thing. Because i feel we all have our lives to live.
I need your advice because I'm already fed up of my dad's attitude and the church's doctrines.

You can also share similar experiences. If you have any
Thank you.

If you are still under his roof, you have to abide by his rules and regulations till you're on your own. Sorry, persevere a little bit

Flourishh:
The thing is, I'm 24 and I'm done with school, done with Nysc, and I'm working at the moment. I'm still living under his roof.
But the whole pressure is still there and I find it hard to leave the church since I'm a pastor's daughter.

Just relocate love, then they won't have a say, people in churches like this want everyone to be a member, God if everywhere of you feel you are not comfortable there just leave cos you are deceiving yourself.

"...the world is becoming churchy and the church is becoming worldly" - Winston Churchill.



The reason most people wanna leave Deeper Life is because they wanna get the FREE TICKET TO LIVE A WORLDLY LIFE. They wanna attend a church that condones worldly life.


Though I'm not a Deeper Lifer, I'm planning to join them soon; because they're the only ALMOST PERFECT CHURCH by my assessment. Everything about them is totally scriptural.

frosbel2:


But her dad who is a so called deeperlifer has ANGER ISSUES, how about your HOLY church deliver him from the spirit of ANGER ?

To start with, I'm not even a Deeper Life member.
Also, it's not the church that's responsible for his anger, it's a personal habit, and it's left to him to subject himself to being free from it.

SAMBARRY:
my own grouse and reason for annoyance is why do churches rival with themselves yet they claim to be worshipping God.they will say haaa don't go to Anglican,there are witches there,Methodist is a church for wizards and other stupid things like that

The truth is most Africans suck at parenting

the truth is most African parents are afraid to ask questions

the truth is most Africans believe they know better because they gave birth to you

the truth is most African parents are largely ignorant

the truth is African parents don't know difference between when to love ,when to protect and when to respect

the truth is African parent pass down ideologies without knowing why it is so

the truth is African parents are religious slave

The truth is not all the ways of African parents are true hence not all should be followed through like zombie.

Somebody's daughter is coming out to publicly declare that her dad pisses her off. She's even using all manners of ill language to describe her biological father. This kind of daughter can KILL her father.

WHAT KIND OF DAUGHTER IS SHE?

May God not give us children that will become the reason for our restlessness.

SAMBARRY:
if you don't deliver yourself,they will still be telling you what to wear,what to eat,where to go etc till you enter your thirties and to now start saying anything will be hard because you've made them used to pushing you here and there.

I'm not saying you should be rebellious,you can get your respect back by reminding them that some of your mates are married and if you were,will you still be dictating the church I attend?

hey wadup
I've read all your messages and I understand you very well..most people quoting you don't realize that where in the 21 century. most of our parent's where born in the olden days. there thinking is so different from the current parents. they still see that power in doing everything and making every decision.

this morning I called my family for meeting because of my dad, and I told my mind because so many decisions he has taking has been bad on us and told him to his he should be ready because if I leave this country I will never return . they where all shocked.

I have been forced to that point. so many quoting you should learn from this mistakes of our parents not to give Strict rules to there kids because this kids where giving both.

well I don't have much to say! despite the fact that I was born n I'm still a member....I dont feel pressured to attend the church cos I've just come to realized that what mattered most to me is how I serve God... church is just a conveyor to heaven, the most important thing is you! if u go to d church n ur heart is not there then stop! God doesn't force anything on us...the thing about some of our parents is they get saddened n angry when they see us leaving the kind of program they've prepared for us. my dear d ball is in ur court, choose what u want..I will just like to say that in what ever u r choosing make sure u don't deviate from God's way. if ur parents get mad at u now for leaving trust me they will later come to realize why n respects u for ur decision. God bless u sis.

Euouae:



Thats a wrong notion.

Seconded... That is why we are still here in Africa... Our culture which we sud start believing naw was formulated by men to suite and favor them... We need to start thinking deeply.... It is this same culture that has given birth to all these religion jargons perpetuating nuisance in our beloved Africa today......