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"Self Defence Is Your Right" - Pastor Paul Enenche (Video) / Deeper Life Church Completes Headquarters After 15 Years (Photos) / God Himself Convinced Me Tithing Was Right - Pastor Adeboye (2) (3) (4)
|I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Flourishh(f): 10:03pm On Feb 17, 2018|
As we all know, many people believe the children of pastors are mostly wayward.
I for example, I'm a female and my dad is a pastor in Deeper life Bible Church and trust me I've been looking for ways to leave the church. My dad isn't even helping matters, he has serious temper issues that makes him say things that gets me, my mum and siblings angry. I really do not see myself getting married in his church. Please tell me if I'm doing the right thing. Because i feel we all have our lives to live.
I need your advice because I'm already fed up of my dad's attitude and the church's doctrines.
You can also share similar experiences. If you have any
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by greatnaija01: 10:06pm On Feb 17, 2018|
- GAIN ADMISSION TO A FAR UNIVERSITY OR DURING NYSC HOWEVER FAR YOU ARE DEPLOYED, BASE THERE AND DONT COME BACK
- MARRY SOMEONE WHO IS NOT FROM DEEPER LIFE
- GET A JOB FAR FROM HOME SO U HAVE TO RELOCATE
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Flourishh(f): 10:13pm On Feb 17, 2018|
The thing is, I'm 24 and I'm done with school, done with Nysc, and I'm working at the moment. I'm still living under his roof.
But the whole pressure is still there and I find it hard to leave the church since I'm a pastor's daughter.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by SAMBARRY: 10:23pm On Feb 17, 2018|
IF YOU don't feel fulfilled in the church where you ARE BUT you're going there to please your parents,you're wasting your time
My parents aren't pastors but I left the church.my pastor noticed and asked my parents and they told him sambarry now attends xyz church,pastor requested I see him so just to honor my parents,I went to see him.he started using emotional manipulation,guilt tripping and a little bit of emotional abuse.of course I could see his anger clearly which also pissed me off the more
Like why should you say because I attended a church since I was 8,gives you the entitlement mentality to think you own me?what further put me off was he criticizing the new church I attend and explaining why his church is better of.How superstitious and ignorant my church is and all thinking that will deter ME
He then gave an analogy of if you have a child you've groomed and nurtured since she was 8 and then she's grown and says she's leaving you and don't want anything to do with you,how will you feel?
Straight up I told him,I'm the CEO of my life,my life my rules.have a nice day sir and walked away immediately
First of all if you don't like your parents church,emancipate yourself from your parents.make them realise you're old enough to make your decisions and stand by the consequences
The first day as an older teenager back then THAT I told my parents I'm not following them to church,THEY thought it was a joke.when they were all dressed and I was STILL in my pyjamas at 9AM, and I carried a straight face insisting I AM not going,THEY realized I was serious.when my dad wanted to start getting confrontational I told him,the only thing that Will move me out of this house to church is physical force and I'm ready.moreover the worst you can say is for me to leave your house which I will gladly do
Omo the next Sunday,they were like sambarry we're already going to church o,help us close the gate.
The thing with African parents is that if you don't start enforcing what you want and how you should be treated,THEY will STILL be making decisions for you that YOU should be able to make for yourself without giving a damn about how you feel.if you don't want to go,tell him,he cannot drag YOU
I'll give another example.There's this friend of mine who the dad was similar to yourself,she owns a beer parlor now.the father forced her to church and she has always been orchestrating how she will leave,she just needed that one opportunity so whilst she was delivering her lines on the pulpit (she's a lead chorister,the dad snatched the microphone from HER and was yelling at her in public in the presence of the church on why she's wearing lip gloss and still has the audacity to sing.BABE,guess what my friend did.she immediately pulled off her deeper life turban,flung it on the pulpit and walked out from the church to go lodge in a hotel till she cooled off and got an apartment for herself.the beef between her and the dad was serious to the extent that she initially didn't want to invite the dad to her wedding if not for THE intervention of the mother.if you see how chic she looks in her makeup and dress untypical of a deeper you will marvel
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by greatnaija01: 10:30pm On Feb 17, 2018|
wow WRONG TIME o.... you woke up at the wrong time.... you will have to WAIT for marriage.... Most people even ladies have the vision of not going back to their parent's home but u didnt start planning early enough. SO marriage is your only option
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by SAMBARRY: 10:38pm On Feb 17, 2018|
Flourishh:if you don't deliver yourself,they will still be telling you what to wear,what to eat,where to go etc till you enter your thirties and to now start saying anything will be hard because you've made them used to pushing you here and there.
I'm not saying you should be rebellious,you can get your respect back by reminding them that some of your mates are married and if you were,will you still be dictating the church I attend?
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by kitaatita: 10:44pm On Feb 17, 2018|
You can leave but not when you are under his roof. Except you are ready for a tough fight and you don't seem ready for it. Marriage is the best option for you
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by SAMBARRY: 10:47pm On Feb 17, 2018|
greatnaija01:when popsi was threatening me with I won't pay your school fees,I.won't give you pocket money,back then at 19 or so,I said no problem na,don't give me.if YOU don't give me there are thousands of guys that Will give me (it's a LIE o,na just shakara.I didn't mean it) Shebi if they ask me why I didn't go to school,I will say it's you that didn't pay my school fees,let's see who will get the insult.
Babe,my pocket MONEY dry enter steady,till I finished school and even when I was at home those days and they sometimes forget themselves by calling me unsavory names,I remind them that daddy you can pass your message across without insults.it's not until you insult me,I will do what you want
Since that time till I left the house even as a young girl,if I serve popsi food,he will tell me,thank you,when he wants to send me errand he will say so with respect,e.g please help me do this,not come here,fool,etc typical of how parents insult their daughters.it's you that will train them on how to talk to you,adress you etc
You think African parents care about your age if you don't deliver yourself?lol
I remember my cousin who her dad slapped on her wedding day inside the car in the presence of guests where her husband's friend acted as the driver for that day.that's how disrespectful and disregardful for your feelings or age they can be,if you don't set boundaries now.
That day I was just looking very irritated but in my mind I was laughing because I know they have so basterdized and mumunized her that she can't do anything about it.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by shadeyinka(m): 12:19am On Feb 18, 2018|
Flourishh:I understand you well.
However, as long as you are under his roof and dependent upon him for sustainance, you are required to be obedient to his rules.
That is the Christlike way.
Max, five years, you are married. Then you can do anything you want
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by shadeyinka(m): 12:40am On Feb 18, 2018|
I perceive you feel honestly justified until you reverse the table and see your own child doing exactly the same for you.
At that time, your views would be ultraconservative to your child. Like
"...Satan is a morning star: I want to be going to the Luciferian Church.
You will then most likely feel like your parent felt when you declared your independence
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by orisa37: 12:51am On Feb 18, 2018|
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by iamnlia(m): 1:16am On Feb 18, 2018|
LOL, Your analogy is still flawed.
I'm sure you'll feel joy when you see a child from an islamic home converting to Christianity, by then you'll forget that a child should be his parent's minion.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by shadeyinka(m): 1:25am On Feb 18, 2018|
iamnlia:I get your point. But I was talking to you purely as a Christian.
Children obey your parents in the Lord (in all things).
As long as one is dependent on ones parent and they are not leading you to hell/against God, this is valid!
We feel justified until the table gets turned
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by SAMBARRY: 5:14am On Feb 18, 2018|
shadeyinka:you're not getting my point.I'm not saying SHE should be rebellious or disrespectful to her parents,but set BOUNDARIES
I'm also not saying SHE should go to a demonic church but she should pray,sieve the church she chooses whether it's in reconciliation with the bible and know whether you feel fulfilled
There are somethings that shouldn't be done for a child at a certain age
You cannot wear clothes for her,put food in her mouth or bath her.similarly you shouldn't choose church for her.let her parents allow her to exercise her brain and power of choice
NO matter how much you love a child,give her the opportunity to make her decision before you turn her to an imbecilic and over dependent child that cannot make decisions except mummy is there
The question YOU should be asking yourself is do I want to raise an emotionally matured individual,who has initiave and can make decisions for herself or do i want her to be totally dependent on me in every thing she does and making her own life decisions (EVERY African parents dream)
Almost like THEY want to think for you,determine WHERE you go,who you talk to,what type of company you should send your cv to etc
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by debolayinka(m): 6:17am On Feb 18, 2018|
Most people here got their responses triggered when they saw "Deeper Life".
Sis, do you know God beyond what your parents and church have always taught you? You don't have to leave the church, neither do you need to leave home to gain freedom. Dialogue with your dad on a good day will solve this problem.
Although, we don't know if you also have unpleasant habits that makes your dad relate with you that way.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by mystiquemaestro(m): 6:18am On Feb 18, 2018|
SAMBARRY:I think you are on a totally different course from the poster's question. You are clearly talking rebellion and defiance of authority in all your submissions here. You aren't even giving ideas that would foster good parent-child relationship in any manner.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by SAMBARRY: 6:48am On Feb 18, 2018|
mystiquemaestro:lol.that's what you think but not so.There's what they call disagreeing to agree.it's a friendly fight,so to speak.that's what I'm advocating,not rebellion
Very recently,as of yesterday afternoon,on this SAme forum in nairaland family section,a guy was complaining bitterly of how his inlaws controls his wife against his authority.they tell her what school her children should go,as against the school the man wants his kids to go and can afford,they dictate what she should do and so many many other things that I'm not ready to go into because of deviation from the major issue here,you can read it up over there but the bottom line is that he who is afraid to fight has only postponed her day of fight
Lovers fight a fight that lead to understanding and respect for themselves
Friends do it
Neighbors do it.the fight doesn't mean they hate each other or itself JUST a means to create respect and boundaries
Siblings also do it
You see those people who their parents or inlaws meddle into their marital buisness,it's because they allowed their parents to control their decisions and lives all their lives and marriage didn't change it
If she doesn't deal with it now,she will still deal with it later in a harder and more complicated way
Nobody gives you respect ,not even your parents except you earn it
Otherwise she will be married and they'll still be dictating when she should get pregnant,how many kids she should have,where they should live etc
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Ekejoestar(m): 10:56am On Feb 18, 2018|
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by RZArecta2(m): 10:57am On Feb 18, 2018|
Flourishh:it will be better if you wait till you're independent ie you stay alone not when you're under his roof where you'll have to endure plenty talk
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Pope22(m): 10:59am On Feb 18, 2018|
Nonsense question, are you marrying your father?
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by kalvoken(m): 10:59am On Feb 18, 2018|
I would have advise you use stubbornness, but being a pastor in the church he won't take it easy with you. It will be bad omen to his pastorship. so he will never let that.
Though, you still have an option. since you are done with your schools and service, and working already. you should try and get a job and apartment far away from your parents, if possible in another state. You can even share apartment with a friend till you can foot the bill alone.
unless you are not living with then in same house, am telling you heaven will fall if you try anything funny in the he name of changing to another church.
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Godswillnwaoma(m): 10:59am On Feb 18, 2018|
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by olu690(m): 11:02am On Feb 18, 2018|
Deeper life people are very holy and u can hardly approach them? you have to be veeeeery holy 4 u to be with them.. I advice u find ur square root and be happy 4 life!!!
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by ZombieBuster: 11:03am On Feb 18, 2018|
Follow Christ and not church
No pastor has the power to save except God
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by AishaBuhari: 11:03am On Feb 18, 2018|
I hate religious fanatics
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by gentlegenius(m): 11:03am On Feb 18, 2018|
Op, I have just 2 advice for you. But before I do that, let me tell you my own experience... About 3 years ago, I was in the same situation or even a worse situation than you. My dad is an evangelist in the church I attend right from birth. The same church I was baptised and even trained to be a Preacher. My entire family attends this church and sometimes, I stood on the pulpit to preach sermons to congregation.
When I decided to stop going to this church about 3 years ago, it wasn't easy for me in my family. Everyone protested against me except my 2 younger sisters. My dad and my elder brother were on my neck every Sunday. But I stood my grounds. I told them that anyone who wishes to challenge my decision should use the scriptures instead of personal sentiments and church doctrines. Before I said that, I already know the Bible portion they'll use against me(Heb 10:25). I was able to counter them anytime they mention this portion. I didn't want to start another church immediately because they'll quickly criticise and find faults in that church. I stayed at home every Sunday to study the Bible. The more I study the word of God, the more I find more reasons why I should not even go back to that church. Right now, they are tired of bothering me because they themselves have come to understand the reason why I stop following them to that church.
Now here are my advice for you:
1. Take your decision as a grown up adult and if you dad challenge your decision, tell him to show you from the Bible, why you should stick to one particular church. I bet he won't be able to show you. If he insist you should do that to obey him, then ask him if his own father was a deeper life member and if his decision to remain in deeper life was to obey his own father. I bet again he won't be able to justify himself.
2. Don't be in a hurry to join another church because your dad will quickly find faults in that church and use that to criticise your decision. There's no perfect church on earth. Stay at home on Sundays and use that time to study the word of God. I assure you that there are so many truths in the scriptures that can change your life but you haven't discovered them yet. He will calm down when he realise that you are not in a hurry to join another church that might mislead you. He will let you be when he is convinced that you've known the truth from the scriptures and any other church you attend will not be able to mislead you. Only then can you start attending another church.
As for me, I haven't attended any church for 3 years now, yet my life is still moving from Heights to Heights because I know the truth and nobody can mislead me.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by emerged01(m): 11:03am On Feb 18, 2018|
SAMBARRY:Payback is near. You may later see reason your dad was trying to guard you but then it maybe too late. If you are old enough,you need to be under your roof to do what you feel like doing.
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by horpeyemmi66(m): 11:04am On Feb 18, 2018|
The father's faith wouldn't save the daughter on the day of tribulation and vice versa. Moreover, there ain't no Church in heaven. One thing I do is sieve the doctrines handed out by men, the logical ones I work with, the silly ones head for the bin.
Happy Sunday ma'am
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|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by tstx(m): 11:04am On Feb 18, 2018|
Checkout the link on my signature... ps: don't bother if you don't have a mind of your own
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Einl(m): 11:04am On Feb 18, 2018|
Be honest and open with him. Tell him how you feel. Tell him your mind. Cry, so he will see your emotions.
And when you finally leave, don't go to a nonsense church. Find a nice Catholic or Anglican church.
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Ephaig: 11:04am On Feb 18, 2018|
|Re: I Want To Leave My Father's Deeper Life Church. Is It Right? - Pastor's Daughter by Pope22(m): 11:05am On Feb 18, 2018|
Is your mother still attending her father's church after marriage? If yes, is she still attending her father's church because her father insisted or because they coincidentally belong to same church? Answer the question yourself. So if you agree to marry me now for love sake, you will continue attending your father's church if that's not my church? Are you marrying your father?
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