Welcome, Guest: Register On Nairaland / LOGIN! / Trending / Recent / New
Stats: 3,160,499 members, 7,843,514 topics. Date: Wednesday, 29 May 2024 at 07:13 AM

My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding - Family (26) - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding (79589 Views)

MARTIAL BED: My Wife Says No Sex Until Her Mother Leaves Our House. / We Kept Ourselves; No Sex Before Marriage: PHOTOS / My Wife Says No Sex Until Her Mother Leaves Our House. (2) (3) (4)

(1) (2) (3) ... (23) (24) (25) (26) (27) (28) (29) ... (33) (Reply) (Go Down)

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by paix(m): 10:15am On Oct 31, 2019
marvin905:





dude they are married as far as the two families agree and the bride price have been paid they are married
That's ok by me. If the white wedding is the stumbling block, why not do it next month? Case closed.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by kunleweb: 10:16am On Oct 31, 2019
sassysure:


If she dont want to have sex, what is she doing in his house,hypocrite?
What message is she sending across by living with him in the same house, isn't that a sin too?
The bible said ok If your left hand will lead u to sin, cut it off.
She sleeps with a man whose brain is already wired to see her as his wife.
She is a wicked soul.
She should go back to her mother's house in owerri.
Robbing Peter to pay Paul.
The man has restraint and I commend him. Some other would have raped her and nothing will come off it.
She is his wife. Simple.

U hypocrites trying to justify nonsense. How come u didn't see that she is already living with him as his wife yet she is claiming holy.
All the sins that man has been committing because of her is in her head, pastor hypocrite who prefer another man's culture than his.
Be it masturbation, be it thinking of looking outside etc is on her head.


Allow me reiterate, you're the one responsible for your damaged vagina. Stop taking it out on more decent people wink
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by LadyHeaven(f): 10:17am On Oct 31, 2019
BiggyB242:


"It isn't much to ask" that how it goes for every other issues, well I don't blame her, the guy who thought he could change her mind is the one to be blamed.

For every 1man there are 3women, don't know why men stress their selves when it comes to issues of finding a wife. Any type of woman a man seeks they are everywhere, is just finance that limits a man's choices.

It's pointless trying to reason with you, you already see the world through a myopic lens so I take a bow, have a good day sir.

3 Likes 3 Shares

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by deltateam: 10:17am On Oct 31, 2019
igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks

Oga if you are a Christian you would understand her stand.
She has been straight forward with you so far. Fault is yours.

I deduce you have the funds for wedding and I advise you do wedding and all holds would be unbarred.

You claim you love her. This is a test of love. Don't force her against her will otherwise it would amount to rape.

Abide by what you two agreed on.

4 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by deltateam: 10:18am On Oct 31, 2019
Drkeo:
She's hiding something from you....

Lousy comment.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by litaninja(m): 10:18am On Oct 31, 2019
Its quite unfortunate that your wife has either been brainwashed to the point where she believes any thing originating outside the shores of her homeland is the holy grail or you are being taken on the ride of your life.
Different tribes have had the "marriage" rites from time immemorial. The "traditional wedding" you have done is your marriage ceremony. The christian wedding your wife is so adamant about is another tribe's traditional wedding. You are wasting your money and possibly your time with this person.

igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:19am On Oct 31, 2019
The is nothing like church wedding , we just added that . My clear and sincere advise if she refuses sex push the white wedding or Church whatever it is . When you have paid the bride price you are good to go My brother.

I you fix the wedding without sex then whatever outcome bear with it.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by marvin905(m): 10:19am On Oct 31, 2019
WriterX:


thanks for indulging may I ask if you celebrate Christmas?

because if you do according to some Christian doctrines you are partaking in an occultic festival or something of that nature fact is Jesus wasn't born in December and there was a certain festival in honor of some deity and all that which to some sense have some proof

listen I am not much of a religious person even though I respect each and every religion the thing is Christianity has survived this far by adapting customs and traditions , yes a white wedding is a white man's thing as well as Christianity but we accepted it because it provided standards by which we felt were morally right and socially acceptable in the eyes of the world.

I get your point in my family, traditional wedding is the wedding too but that doesn't make the significance of the white wedding at less sort after.

much respect to you and your opinion.



I understand your points ..
buh let me highlight something for you..
whether we like it or not both marriages are not on equal ground one out weigh the other..
let me put this to you..
you can do a traditional marriage without doing White in our society and in the eyes of God and man you are married buh you can't do a Christian marriage without a traditional no church will wed you ..if you know of a church that will do that please say..
and let me tell you this most people that seek white wedding isn't because of religious beliefs from my own observation..
as for me I couldn't careless about white wedding but if my future says she wants it and financial capable I will give it to her
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by marvin905(m): 10:21am On Oct 31, 2019
kunleweb:



I'll show you if you're the owner of the vagina. Olodo. Kids who denigrate principles, that's why they always fall victims to what wasn't meant for then to become victims of.



now I know you're stupid
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:21am On Oct 31, 2019
MisterKings:


Stay put...No wedding till you have sex. This is how it will go...if you allow this, she will expect you to allow all other rubbish she throws at you as the years go by in your marriage.
The real marriage is the traditional marriage, not white wedding, that one is just party. So tell her, you are now her husband and if she will not do what you want, you will cancel the wedding and maybe even divorce her traditionally.

She is your wife now, I see no reason why she wants some pastor to tell her that before she starts acting as one.
And she already packed her bags to Abuja to live with him in his house, yet she want the man to behave like stone.
Agree to this and u will.soon start seeing, no sex during fasting for one month, church activities superseding her marital interest. So many of them have lead their husbands outside with their useless laws.
I blame the @op, foolishly accepting the rubbish in the first place.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by marvin905(m): 10:21am On Oct 31, 2019
WriterX:


thanks for indulging may I ask if you celebrate Christmas?

because if you do according to some Christian doctrines you are partaking in an occultic festival or something of that nature fact is Jesus wasn't born in December and there was a certain festival in honor of some deity and all that which to some sense have some proof

listen I am not much of a religious person even though I respect each and every religion the thing is Christianity has survived this far by adapting customs and traditions , yes a white wedding is a white man's thing as well as Christianity but we accepted it because it provided standards by which we felt were morally right and socially acceptable in the eyes of the world.

I get your point in my family, traditional wedding is the wedding too but that doesn't make the significance of the white wedding at less sort after.

much respect to you and your opinion.







I understand your points ..
buh let me highlight something for you..
whether we like it or not both marriages are not on equal ground one out weigh the other..
let me put this to you..
you can do a traditional marriage without doing White in our society and in the eyes of God and man you are married buh you can't do a Christian marriage without a traditional no church will wed you ..if you know of a church that will do that please say..
and let me tell you this most people that seek white wedding isn't because of religious beliefs from my own observation..
as for me I couldn't careless about white wedding but if my future says she wants it and financial capable I will give it to her

1 Like

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:22am On Oct 31, 2019
marvin905:




please show the place In the Bible that relates with what you said..
and tell me what is the highest type of marriage rite done in the Bible
Thank You
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Acidosis(m): 10:23am On Oct 31, 2019
The Federal Government of Nigeria must as a matter of urgency place a HEAVY TAX on multiple weddings. You either do one or two of traditional, church/Islamic, and registry or pay a tax of N1,000,000 to your state government. If you are unsatisfied and filled with LUST so much that you desire 3 types of weddings in a poor country like Nigeria, you must forfeit 1 million naira to the government. If you don't know how to spend your money, the government will help.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:23am On Oct 31, 2019
kunleweb:



He's unable to turn her own to lose her guard on his own. He's trying to enter the oucci through her head instead of through her mind. To fvck any lady, you must increase desuriablity and make her mentally fvck you and be all over you mentally before the physical act takes place. Na she go dey ask first.

Ask him of his behavior, you'll see the answers there.
Don't want to hear stories that touch the liver later sha.
@op please use your number 6
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by kunleweb: 10:24am On Oct 31, 2019
marvin905:




now I know you're stupid


Yeye try harder eediat
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by marvin905(m): 10:24am On Oct 31, 2019
paix:
That's ok by me. If the white wedding is the stumbling block, why not do it next month? Case closed.



and I ask what if he isn't financially capable..
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by kunleweb: 10:25am On Oct 31, 2019
StacyO:

Don't want to hear stories that touch the liver later sha.
@op please use your number 6


Sorry about your vagina BTW and sorry about how cheaply people passed through in and out wink
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:25am On Oct 31, 2019
LadyHeaven:


It's pointless trying to reason with you, you already see the world through a myopic lens so I take a bow, have a good day sir.

My friend, we all have different view about life. You don't expect me to take yours and I don't expect the same. That doesn't make you or I either right or wrong. Have a great day.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by MisterKings(m): 10:26am On Oct 31, 2019
sassysure:

And she already packed her bags to Abuja to live with him in his house, yet she want the man to behave like stone.
Agree to this and u will.soon start seeing, no sex during fasting for one month, church activities superseding her marital interest. So many of them have lead their husbands outside with their useless laws.
I blame the @op, foolishly accepting the rubbish in the first place.

100% agree with you jare. Nonsense nonsense things they bring up and down in the name of I am a Christian.
What if in the end now she turns out non virgin, then what happens?
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by WriterX(m): 10:26am On Oct 31, 2019
marvin905:








I understand your points ..
buh let me highlight something for you..
whether we like it or not both marriages are not on equal ground one out weigh the other..
let me put this to you..
you can do a traditional marriage without doing White in our society and in the eyes of God and man you are married buh you can't do a Christian marriage without a traditional no church will wed you ..if you know of a church that will do that please say..
and let me tell you this most people that seek white wedding isn't because of religious beliefs from my own observation..
as for me I couldn't careless about white wedding but if my future says she wants it and financial capable I will give it to her


no argument from my side, well said bruh
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by lizychimamanda(f): 10:26am On Oct 31, 2019
Mogambo123:
If she's not a virgin then you av been scammed.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:27am On Oct 31, 2019
kunleweb:



Allow me reiterate, you're the one responsible for your damaged vagina. Stop taking it out on more decent people wink

U resorted to insults when u were floored?

U are no longer a pastor?

How many have u deceived, u follow my words but not my action buffoon?
Coming online to form pious and righteous.
Small jab at you and your true colour manifested immediately cheesy cheesy
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by healthserve(m): 10:27am On Oct 31, 2019
Acidosis:

The Federal Government of Nigeria must as a matter of urgency place a HEAVY TAX on multiple weddings. You either do one or two of traditional, church/Islamic, and registry or pay a tax of N1,000,000 to your state government. If you are unsatisfied and filled with LUST so much that you desire 3 types of weddings in a poor country like Nigeria, you must forfeit 1 million naira to the government. If you don't know how to spend your money, the government will help.




See who's spreading fears again


EkperemoEgbabi Apitch Willie2015


Now wasn't I accurate the other day?
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by marvin905(m): 10:27am On Oct 31, 2019
kunleweb:



Yeye try harder eediat



after observing your madness..
I give up on you..
can't waste my strength on someone like you

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by darelar(m): 10:28am On Oct 31, 2019
To the OP, am sorry to say this but I pray you won't regret that your action later. Am talking from experience, I was dating a girl that said no to sex and as baddo wey I be, I try to be a good boy for once due to several caution from my friend and one of her friend that I know her through. After almost 2 year's, we did introduction in 2012 during fuel subsidy strike and her parents gave us the full right as husband and wife. My girl still denied me sex and even came to my house and spent 13 days without sex. I have to discharge her with excuse that am going for job in Akwaibon and she needs to go back to her place for Xmas in December 2012. Her mum was very angry with her because of her action and my stands is that she need to be pregnant before I can do final marriage on her head . By 2013, she was pregnant for another guy and thanks to God and my � that I didn't put all my eggs in a basket. When am not pleased with her attitude, I was dating two girls, one said we can't marry on religion basis because of her dad and the other one is same religion which makes it more easier. By July 2014, she gave birth and am happy for her. Her parents disown her and I intervene on her behalf and I let her parents know that is the will of God and I have move on. I did my introduction on July and I invited her parents to my wedding in September, they we're very happy and pray for me and said they can't attend because they won't be able to face my family because of what their daughter did. By December, we're blessed with a child. So OP am not trying to discourage but be wise as both gender could act funny when it comes to preparing for marriage.

1 Like

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Aladdin1(m): 10:30am On Oct 31, 2019
virgin or not.religious or not.what i see here is that both of you are not sexually compactible.in the future,she would so starve you of sex and attention that you would be so sex-starved and frustuated that you would jerk-off till you nearly yank off your gbola.and you would start regretting of ever marrying her.from what i see here "sex" would be the bane of your marriage to this lady.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Yahami(m): 10:30am On Oct 31, 2019
To my pure understanding of faith, you have gotten the righteous wife, a God fearing someone indeed. I advice you go ahead for the wedding ASAP, even if at the end she is not virgin she might have know the righteous ways of life. One of my Mallam have ever told the gathering in his preaching that he can married prostitude from hostel as long as she has learnt the righteous way. Wish you both peaceful coexistence in your affairs, May I be forgiven wherever I err and add to my faith wherever I'm right...I lives everyone here in NL with the words " have fear of God in your view"

2 Likes

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Nobody: 10:32am On Oct 31, 2019
Freehuman:





Some men are really cool with anything. When I'm planning to have two kids and at least a male child before marriage, a man lives under the same roof with the woman he legally married and consumation of the marriage is yet to happen. shocked

Everyone here is talking about virginity and not fertility. She may even be a virgin and deep down knows she is not fertile. Over 1000 Nigerian girls(teenagers) suffer from ovarian cyst yearly and most times treatment causes damage to their reproductive system. That's just one disease and there are others.

Marrying in a church can prevent divorce when the male partner wants it immediately on grounds of fertility of the Female. I think a judge will not grant such divorce until the marriage has broken down irretrievably.

From a legal point of view, marrying in a church which is registered under the law as a valid place of celebration of marriage means that the couples contracted statutory marriage ( under the marriage ACT). This means if the marriage has not broken down irretrievably and you intend to divorce her on grounds of infertility the court may not grant a decree nicee. If the man proceeds to dissolve the marriage without a grant by the court , she can sue him for bigamy. It may take up to 5 years before you begin to abuse her and make the marriage break down irretrievably.

An average religious bigot is likely to believe that if she adheres to such extreme religious doctrines (abstinence from sex until a church wedding) her infertility may be cured.

I know my reason is abstract but it must not be ruled out.
Wow!! People are hiding a lot behind those beautiful faces shocked shocked shocked

1 Like

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by mercy87(f): 10:32am On Oct 31, 2019
Oga agreement na agreement. The only thing I blame her is coming to live with you in Abuja. You have put the wedding on hold, You don even report her to her parents and pastors. You try well well. Clap for your self. Marriage never start u don dey do report report. Shame.
All what I see is a strongly opinionated man who is equally hard. I doubt the love you even say you have for her. Jacob waited for Rachel seven years and the Bible says it was like a few days to him because of the huge love he had for her. Sometimes its not about right or wrong but making sacrifices, love is sacrificial.

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Adabekee04(f): 10:33am On Oct 31, 2019
It is my choice Darling and I am entitled to it. Thank you
Acidosis:


Traditional wedding or the payment of bride price is not enough for you to sleep with your man?

You're a religious fanatic. White wedding is not in your bible.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by Rajman45(m): 10:34am On Oct 31, 2019
Sirvingeo:
op you got a good wife. She has the fear of God that is why she wants you to do the church wedding which depicts God's involvement. You better don't loose a good woman because of sex o. I promise you a lady that could go this far for God will never cheat on you after wedding .

I wish you happy marriage life and I pray I get a godly wife like her. Amen!!!
Calm down jor....
So the traditional marriage na devil involvement àbí?.
Marriage starts and End with the payment or refund of the bride price.
Re: My Wife Insists No Sex Until Wedding Night Even After Our Traditional Wedding by stephnie44(f): 10:37am On Oct 31, 2019
igwegeorgiano:
Friends on NL I greet you all. Trust your day is going well? It is with very heavy heart and confused state of mind I sent this post on this platform so you can advise me on what line of action I should take. Pastors and genuine men of God should also advise me on what to do as well.

There is this lady i have been dating for about a year and 6 months now. We love each other to the moon and most importantly we respect each other opinion and decisions. She is a born again christian who appreciates the things of God more than she appreciates me which of course I have no issues with.

When we agreed to start up a relationship after being friends for about 6 months, it was agreed that there will be no sex until the wedding night but at a point I asked her "what if we are done with traditional marriage rites are we still not gonna have sex? To my creates surprise she said we won't until church wedding is done. I did not actually took her serious.

Fast forward, on the 15th of July 2019 the traditional marriage was done in her father' compound in the east and all I was asked to pay and give was paid and given without any remainder . after the traditional marriage we went back to my house in abuja. Note that we were not staying together before now. I am base in abuja while she is in owerri. When we got home that night I told her we can now make love as husband and wife hence the traditional rites has been done and most importantly the bride price paid. To my amazement my wife bluntly refused. She told me she will never compromise her stand on pre marital sex

I have been very faithful to our agreement based on her claim that she is a virgin. But refusing me my right over her body after every thing including the bride price has been paid is something I can never subscribed to and to this end I have I have involved her parent and her pastor her decision however, still remain no sex till the wedding night. I am putting the wedding on hold for now until she willingly allow me make love to her and she seems not to be comfortable with my decision as well.

This is the dilemma I have found myself please I need your wise counsels on this. Thanks and remain bless. Moderators kindly push this post to the front page so it can have adequate views it deserves thanks
well if its d virginity stuff DAT is making u react. Take her for a virginity test

(1) (2) (3) ... (23) (24) (25) (26) (27) (28) (29) ... (33) (Reply)

'A Man Who Lives In This Kind Of Apartment Shouldn't Be Thinking Of Marriage' / Anthony Chijioke: Dr. Ozuzu George Davidson Slept With My Wife (Photos) / 5 Health Benefits Of Sucking Your Woman's Breast

(Go Up)

Sections: politics (1) business autos (1) jobs (1) career education (1) romance computers phones travel sports fashion health
religion celebs tv-movies music-radio literature webmasters programming techmarket

Links: (1) (2) (3) (4) (5) (6) (7) (8) (9) (10)

Nairaland - Copyright © 2005 - 2024 Oluwaseun Osewa. All rights reserved. See How To Advertise. 115
Disclaimer: Every Nairaland member is solely responsible for anything that he/she posts or uploads on Nairaland.