₦airaland Forum

Yoighaman:
If I cheated 500 times and you do just once, whether I get to know or you confess, forget it, it's all over.

People can air their opinions, it's theirs for keeps, that's why our finger prints are different. What others can live with, I simply can't....call me self-righteous or a hypocrite, again that's your opinion, keep it safe.

KingEd:
Get close to God and see Him work wonders, savvy?

MissJoy29:
Na today! Have you not seen married guys accusing their sidechics of cheating on them?

olabrinks:
I always say if you are cheating on your husband, please oh just take it to the grave or hide it very very well. There’s no amount of ranting or equality that can modify the nature of men. There’s nothing like if ‘I can forgive him why can’t he do the same’? The quicker you accept the realities of life, the easier life will be for you. They simply cannot handle a cheating gf/wife. They just can’t, no matter how much they try. That’s how many women have peace in their homes, they cheat and they cover it well. The only time you should confess is if children are involved.

Pinkie2018:
you have no business getting married with this your ideology. Just get a baby mama. Then continue your philandering. It's ur calling

Yoighaman:
So you already making an excuse for a cheating wife? The cheating husband though bad can be a given, not that I outrightly support it anyway....ok, me I want to marry you, lol...now you know I have a business getting married. *smiling*

Pinkie2018:
......The cheating husband though bad can be given..... Pls I find it very hard to understand this phrase

Omojudy:
Why are men especially from this country so self righteous? Men not women are the reason why many marriages fail.
To my fellow women don’t cheat, and don’t tell things to your husband of things that happened before you met him.
He will use it against you. No exception, every woman who made the mistake in the past thought her man was the exception.
Ok, I don talk my own.
Nice day you all!

DedeNkem:
You are delusional!

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

Ganjafama:
I get your point bro but somethings are better left unsaid. As it is now, it will take more than commitment for that marriage to remain the same. The dude is obviously pained that's why he's here. And he is going to feel pained anytime he his making love to is wife , inspite of the fact that he also cheated. It's the way men are wired.

Omojudy:
Like seriously, cheating is bad enough. Wear a condom already! Grouse men, then they will want their wives to give them Mouth Action!

smat101:
Yes it is
A woman's beauty is Her pride...
it really hurts a lady when you insult her about her looks, She will hardly forget it and you
Stop telling fat girls they're fat...
Stop telling slim girls they don't have bum bum.
.
.
A man's wealth is his pride...
It really hurts a Man when you tell him he's poor..
he knows that you don't have to remind him...

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

Neurotika:
1. The true picture of what really went down can only be depicted well by the man she fvcked. She certainly has edited the story....trust me the devil is in the details.
2. Her reason for cheating isn't the whole story...ultimately, she had it in her core nature and some things just triggered the monster in there.
3. She might still cheat and she might not. But one thing is certain, she will go on a long break first before doing such and it most likely will be emotional cheating not physical.
4. If you're really ready to stop cheating too, entrench a sacred law - No secrets. And find sophisticated ways to secretly track her in the future to see if she will break the rule. If she breaks it thrice in your marriage lifetime. Get a divorce. The psychological trauma an adulterous woman brings can shorten your lifespan.

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

Budline1:
Abi. Truth hurts.

manontree:
For those of you saying they are even, sorry to disappoint you, they arent! The OP is perfectly in order to feel aggrieved

And yes they both cheated. In our immoral society most men cheat. The society is just that badly skewed. Most women even before getting married knows their man has chains of females. Most even bulldozed their way to end up his wife and suddenly expects him to be any different in marriage?

The major issue here is this. A man can sleep with a woman today and not even remember her name tomorrow. In my practice, I have treated several men who can't even remember the woman that well just days after the act. They are out of town, go on a fun roll and get laid...end of....Its like a beer hang out, well sort of...Just for fun

For women it's entirely different and more so in marriage. There is a saying that you have to win a woman's heart to win her body...No saying is truer especially for a married woman...Think about it...For a married woman to do this, it's not just for fun...Something deeper is involved

In my practice, the most common reason women do this tend to be money. Aside this , they do so cos they fell for the man and would gladly do it over and over again as long as the man is interested. This is one big reason African culture frowns at a woman cheating, and infact why it is seen as a taboo whereas a man's is tolerated.

I am willing to bet most of the women on this forum screeching that they are even, would be the first to push out their sister in law who cheats on their brother, even when they are the one arranging their friends for the said married brother

Now for the OP. This is my advise especially having had numerous experience treating STI for married women who must confess to me and who are desperate for their husband not to know about such infections

(1) Insist she tells you about all her deeds. Insist you just discovered it wasnt once like she said and you "Miraculously" or "spiritually" whetever found out she lied about her singular affair...You might just be surprised how clean she comes. Act mad and really mad and talk like how can she withhold such critical and vital info. If you must, act weird and demand full disclosure with a threat of walk out

(2) Be sure to know who the person(s) are and go through their conversations via her phone. Check her honesty that the relationship is over by using her phone to chat up the man/men. See his/their response...This is vital as an adulterous woman, if she must be forgiven, must come clean fully and you must have all the information. There is strong trust issues that must first be resolved.

(3) If this stray was just once as she claims, and no evidence of further likely acts, move on from it

From my experience, women that stay apart from their husband , eg living in separate cities, tend to do this more

Bola146:
though it's very wrong to keep secrets in marriage, yes very bad. You don't need to be worried... Both of you should accept Jesus Christ into your lives , confess all your sins to Him only and never go back to your vomits again. I wish you happy home

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

manontree:
For those of you saying they are even, sorry to disappoint you, they arent! The OP is perfectly in order to feel aggrieved

And yes they both cheated. In our immoral society most men cheat. The society is just that badly skewed. Most women even before getting married knows their man has chains of females. Most even bulldozed their way to end up his wife and suddenly expects him to be any different in marriage?

The major issue here is this. A man can sleep with a woman today and not even remember her name tomorrow. In my practice, I have treated several men who can't even remember the woman that well just days after the act. They are out of town, go on a fun roll and get laid...end of....Its like a beer hang out, well sort of...Just for fun

For women it's entirely different and more so in marriage. There is a saying that you have to win a woman's heart to win her body...No saying is truer especially for a married woman...Think about it...For a married woman to do this, it's not just for fun...Something deeper is involved

In my practice, the most common reason women do this tend to be money. Aside this , they do so cos they fell for the man and would gladly do it over and over again as long as the man is interested. This is one big reason African culture frowns at a woman cheating, and infact why it is seen as a taboo whereas a man's is tolerated.

I am willing to bet most of the women on this forum screeching that they are even, would be the first to push out their sister in law who cheats on their brother, even when they are the one arranging their friends for the said married brother

Now for the OP. This is my advise especially having had numerous experience treating STI for married women who must confess to me and who are desperate for their husband not to know about such infections

(1) Insist she tells you about all her deeds. Insist you just discovered it wasnt once like she said and you "Miraculously" or "spiritually" whetever found out she lied about her singular affair...You might just be surprised how clean she comes. Act mad and really mad and talk like how can she withhold such critical and vital info. If you must, act weird and demand full disclosure with a threat of walk out

(2) Be sure to know who the person(s) are and go through their conversations via her phone. Check her honesty that the relationship is over by using her phone to chat up the man/men. See his/their response...This is vital as an adulterous woman, if she must be forgiven, must come clean fully and you must have all the information. There is strong trust issues that must first be resolved.

(3) If this stray was just once as she claims, and no evidence of further likely acts, move on from it

From my experience, women that stay apart from their husband , eg living in separate cities, tend to do this more

sassysure:
Lesson of the day.

For those my ladies that use to wire their mouth" papa emeka, u no see your fellow men out there, no be the same head them carry u carry too? Bla bla bla.....
......, or, that your thing dey no fit stand for 40 seconds ( Thanks to tonto dike)....., u have killed the man already.

When a man look at u and say your boobs are sagged( boobs him and his children will not leave to rest) , ur stomach looks disgusting( after carrying how many plus stretch marks caused by ur pregnancy), or u are so fat( forgetting that some iud can actually make a woman add weight and childbearing), u have finished your wife. If she still love u a little, u may live but if she hates u, u are a dead man standing

cococandy:


The cognitive discombobulation of it all

harrikoko:
So my wife of 4 years and I decided to confess to each after things went a little sour in our marriage. She told me my friendly taunts that 'babe you're getting old oh, I am sure you aren't getting toasters again' led her to commit adultery. That she actually slept with her old crush who happens to be a lecturer in her former school last year. She told me she was going for a make-up job over the weekend last October, I even gave her money for transport and all. She still used my money to lodge herself and her married lecturer man friend in the hotel and got dicked. She said that was the first time and she regretted it. And that she stopped talking to the man right after the Bleep.

I also told her I had a side chick for about 6 months and had a couple of flings with other girls but quit all after my side chick said she got pregnant and wanted to start blackmailing me. And I later discovered the pregnancy was 'audio' she only just wanted money.

We both felt sorry and forgave each other, but my big question now is, if she dated someone right under my nose and I didn't notice, and she perfectly did it. plus she's this church kinda wifey.

Should I be worried? When she told me I almost fainted as I had always trusted her and could bet my life on it at any shrine she wouldn't do it.

DameB:
And you didn't deem it fit to address his own infidelity?
That's why you guys end up being cheated on cos you think you are smart