₦airaland Forum

Ballary:
This your story is pathetic, imagine 13 years without a job, that's were naija have put us in.

It will be much better to look for an understanding girl without liability and settle with, and see how it goes.

Or he just live with the reality that he shouldn't procreate and since majority of Nigerian ladies won't date a man who is not interested in having children, he stays single?

U1:
You see that's what I was saying about taste. It doesn't have to be both of those two examples.

If you'd be spending 20k on fare in a month, you shouldn't be paying so much on rent. That much on transport makes more sense for someone living on the outskirts, where accommodation is typically cheaper. It's either this or that.

Those husband and wife most certainly would have lived in a "face me and face you" kind of place.

A life of struggle? What are most Nigerians used to? The struggle still doesn't stop them from making children, even too many in some cases.

Ladies and gentlemen, here's the reason why Nigeria has the highest number of people suffering from multidimensional poverty.

Very stupid and misleading post from the op. Advising young men to get married and procreate and continue a life of poverty, misery and lack

SweetCunt97:
I remember sending such to guy, only for him to complain that how could I have sent only 100naira, say I no value am. Ungrateful soul he was.

How men ask/receive thins from women wil always baffles me, some even ask with tone of entitlement.

Even ordinary calls, i dont feel comfortable receiving ladies call, i wil hav to drop their calls and call dem back.
I love my masculinity biko.

Impostor:
I pray you don't wait for too long. Thousands of people graduate every year in this country, NO JOBS for them, no loan to start business. I STRONGLY ADVISE ALL YOUNGER GUYS TO DO THE NEEDFUL NOW. This country will delay you, if you wait.

I am still an undergraduate. What are the needful?

Gerrard59:
Ladies and gentlemen, here's the reason why Nigeria has the highest number of people suffering from multidimensional poverty.

Do you realise you have not really said anything?

There's more than one point or matter addressed in the post, but all you could manage was a blanket statement?

When they say vote for Sowore, fools will say No.

Mehn life is not easy....does saying poverty keeps Increasing dont understand this entire world,even in foreign countries some get married without tangable jobs....high birthrate makes poverty affect africa nations!

Rukkydelta:
Nice write up
Most guys come across good women but they feel not ready due to finance and funny thing most may spend years after not making the money. I have seen some aged guys regretting not settling down with the good woman they once had, one even said he told the girl to go and get married that he don't want to waste her time even though she was down to wait for him

Guys if you see a good woman right now old her tight o
And for the guys complaining of seeing gold digger up and down. You will keep seeing them until you desist from classy and flashy ladies

Good women are out there but they are few and not easily seen because they no sabi show themselves like slay Queen

Good luck guys

Hmmm hmmm
Dem no sabi show demselves like a slayers....
Word!! Word!!!

iLegendd:
We think too much about children.

What have we, the black race, contributed into this world apart from children, degree, and crime?

If you don't have a regular source of income, don't follow the advice of the OP.

Before you get married, master the 3 skills below

1. How to handle women skill
2. How to make money skill
3. How to manage money skill

Failure to listen to me, you'll regret as you litter this crime-ridden country with more children who will turn to fraudsters, ritualists, and prôstitutes.

The black race should just be exterminated biko. We are drawing the rest of the world backward.

Coronavirus is here, but Jack Ma of China is the one donating equipment. Even the equipment used in testing for who is positive or negative, we can't produce them, but we're so f*cking willing to marry early and when we are broke just to produce as many children as we can't cater for.

I'm so upset with my fellow blacks.

Mtcheew, oga goan sleep if u dont hav a meaningful tin to say joo

Soo if u re tinking about corona u should not tink about the revolution of ur lifetime again

Even u, wat hav u contributed to the course of humanity, yes u dat is putin blame

Go and make an antidote for coronavirus sir and we wont forget u forever



I dont know why some people tink that they are the wisest just cus they graduated with first class honors. Mtcheew, Ona akoere.

OlawaleBammie:
[s]

Mtcheew, oga goan sleep if u dont hav a meaningful tin to say joo

Soo if u re tinking about corona u should not tink about the revolution of ur lifetime again

Even u, wat hav u contributed to the course of humanity, yes u dat is putin blame

Go and make an antidote for coronavirus sir and we wont forget u forever



I dont know why some people tink that they are the wisest just cus they graduated with first class honors. Mtcheew, Ona akoere. [/s].

I didn't read, but keep it up.

iLegendd:
I didn't read, but keep it up.

I didn't read sha cus the very first lines discouraged me

Impostor:
I agree with you on this one. Going abroad will take him another 6 years to be ready. Then he will be almost 50 and still a bachelor. Guys be wise o

Bachelor @50


Ahh, na achievement and a great feat b dat oo, hin go recv national award from Buhari

OlawaleBammie:
I didn't read sha cus the very first lines discouraged me

Okay.

Dexlomo:
Breeding for ROI, no be for naija ooo. I know many people wey don near 40 wey parents still dey support abi no be naija you dey refer to? Society wey dey get tougher with each passing day...….

Then wat is d attraction na... Why all this early marriage talks eh!! Abeg, anyone care to educate me ...

bdchange:
The black race has been using this mentality the OP stated to continue in recycling poverty into generations and it won't stop any time soon. Marriage should not be your utmost priority rather becoming a success in which ever endeavours you found yourselves. Does it matter if you give birth to your first child at 50yrs, as long as they have a successful future to welcome them into. When people marry without viable means of survival, they just continue to feed from hand to mouth and breeds children along the line then the poverty race continue in that generation. Or what else do you think brings about the majority of poor people living in a country called Nigeria. Have you asked yourself why poor people breeds like rats? While they continue to whalloh in poverty? Just try to get it right no matter the age then your next generation will continue to make exploit of what you have laid down by then they can marry even at 20 and still continue the success story. Chase success first and make sure u get it, then your children will take it from there, then they will be among the generation of wealthy people. Nobody will remember how poor you were then. Just like nobody remembered how poor dangote, otedola, adenuga, Ifeanyi Uba great grand parents were.

This is worth sharing! Another wise person here!! God bless you sir...
Early breeding or even breeding at all, who does it favour that u successfully raised a child in poverty... You or the child? Please let's not drag our kids through undue hardship... How do u feel watching children sit on floors at public schools for class, kids walkin miles to get to sch ... U can choose for yourself to suffer but don't force same on your child...
Agberos, prostitutes, armed robbers etc you think their parents intended they end up d way dey did?. I bet it's probably some OP's type, early marriage that backfired...

dauddy97:
I am still an undergraduate. What are the needful?

after NYSC, look for a little stability and get married, don’t wait to have all the money or comfort

Gerrard59:
Quite contradictory. If it's not the black race but a Nigerian issue, why are the rest of the black race contributing to western societies and not fellow black societies?

I can only speak on what I know, so I do understand I could be wrong. But at least Kenya seems to be driven and moving forward and some other countries , the last time I had the chance to relate with friends from such countries.

Nice post and informative too...am in my late 30s but find it difficult settling down because of no financial... Ur msg is very inspiring

OlawaleBammie:
How men ask/receive thins from women wil always baffles me, some even ask with tone of entitlement.

Even ordinary calls, i dont feel comfortable receiving ladies call, i wil hav to drop their calls and call dem back.
I love my masculinity biko.

Abi, that's d best. So many men have lost their masculinity. Women getting from men means their feminity is active

proclinician:
This nwa otu. Lol

Go sit biko. Ask u to set up fiverr for me and u doing yanga

SweetCunt97:
Go sit biko. Ask u to set up fiverr for me and u doing yanga

Like seriously

proclinician:
Like seriously

Well, we humans gotta have each other's back naw

ephraim18:
Nice post and informative too...am in my late 30s but find it difficult settling down because of no financial... Ur msg is very inspiring

money will come to u. But perhaps u should settle first with a woman who's understanding. I've seen men who married in self contain that has stove.

SweetCunt97:
Well, we humans gotta have each other's back naw

Truly.

proclinician:
Truly.

Yea

SweetCunt97:
Abi, that's d best. So many men have lost their masculinity. Women getting from men means their feminity is active

Dear dat is how nature designed it from tym immemorial, go to every holy book today and dat is the way u wil find it.

Besides, dat is one of the pillars of masculinity, but new generation species of men been ignorantly collapsing the pillar on the altar of selfishness, vague entitlement and ridiculous equality.

People should also know that when guys in say, their early, mid or late thirties arent married or dating, its not all about being broke...I know some who would say they are not just ready/interested in marriage yet and these guys are financially buoyant and can shoulder responsibilites. Dating or being with a woman is not just about the spending or responsibility, some persons won't trade their 'peace of mind' for anything just yet.

Impostor:
Hello NLders

I just want to share my experience. I want people to learn from others.

So recently I started dating and meeting women with the mindset of getting married as everyone around me keep shouting that I am getting overripe. Some are even wondering if everything is ok downstairs lol. How can you not be married up till now? You know those types of comments. But how could I have gotten married when unemployment no release me until 36? Nigeria is something else. It was at that age that I finally landed a decent job. I am even lucky to be where I am now.

So many youths are underemployed/under paid. Less than a month ago, a good friend who is also my course mate messaged me to express his frustration at teaching somewhere for 50k and he said he's now ready to make money anyhow even if it will take someone's blood . It's just a threat out of frustration.

The problem now is that I don't know if there are still good women like our mothers in this country. I have met so many young girls that I have stopped trying, the quest and hunger of these girls for money is just too much.

You are unemployed and you want me to buy you an iPhone of 150,000 Naira and she was making so much noise about it. Meanwhile I use a phone of 30k lol. Almost all the ladies I am meeting are unemployed and expensive. I met one girl awaiting NYSC, she told me straight up, that I will have to be taking care of her, that she's tired of dating broke guys so she has decided that any man she wants to date will have to be responsible for her completely. It sounded like a transaction. Though she's a very pretty, tall girl but I am not even after all those facial beauty.

Another lady told me she has half of her rent and she's looking for the remaining half. The stories are so many, I could write a book with them. I don't even know how to get working class ladies. But I have now realized that Nigerian ladies are not even the problem, it's the economy. Many young ladies are struggling just like guys and the only way they can meet up with their bills is by dating 3/4 guys.


Advise from my experience.

After my NYSC, over 10 years ago, I had this mind set that I won't get married without a job or funds to take proper care of my family. I think that mindset MAY be wrong, so many people still think this way.

I will advise you look at it again because it may take you 15/20 years after University to become comfortable (not your portion). Let me be sincere with you, this Nigeria is getting worse by the day especially with the type of leaders we have, who think only of themselves and their families/tribe.

For example, you can see for yourself what is happening with the outbreak of Corona Virus in the country. After 2 infection, people started advising that we should stop foreign flights, they refused until so many infected people got into the country, now they are running up&down. If we are lucky to get good leaders after now, it may take another 30 years of continuous good leadership to save Nigeria.

My advise is that after your NYSC, if you have a supportive family and a good/understanding girl friend, just marry her and start your family. You two will Hussle together and God will bless your hustle. You may ask why? Because most people finish around 25. If it takes you 10 years to become stable and get married, if you are lucky, you will have your first child at 36, 37. By the time you are 50, your child will be in junior secondary.

Be wise money is not everything.

You made alot of sense. I have notice that what I need in a woman right now is not beauty even the illusion of good character, what I need is a hardworking woman who will respect me. If I find that type I will marry her even if am not financially buoyant yet.

I feel your pain and your shock at what our society seems to have become. But you got a number of things wrong which I will treat point-by-point

1) the economy is never to be blamed for ladies who are materialist. Otherwise we can also go ahead and use the economy to justify why yahoo boys, ritualists, religious leaders, politicians, and armed robbers go ahead to rob people. Economy or no economy individuals reserve the right and the choice of their response to it. Some ladies respond with hard work, smart investment and building businesses, while other ladies choose to become entitled to other's money.
2) physical beauty must never be an important fact in choosing a lady. Once she feels entitled to what you have you have to cut her lose, except the sense of entitlement is mutually tolerated and exercised by the two of you. I don't have to point it out that many of our men too are too damn entitled to the possession of their friends, families and partners.
3) stop painting our mothers in holy halo: some of them are worse than the ladies of our generation. In summary, it takes a ph.u.cked up mother to raise a ph.uck.ed up daughters, and many of us men are also a culmination of our fathers. Accept that ugly side of the truth and then we all can admit that many of us have been messed up by the very parents and society that produced us. In fact a large number of Nigerian men and ladies are choosing not to marry because of the examples they have seen in their parents growing up.
4) A man should only marry when he is financially able to take care of himself, his wife and his children. The same goes for men that have reckless sex and later insist a lady should terminate the pregnancy. Only a stupid man makes such a mistake, and a dumber lady allows herself to be put in such a position like this by a man who has no plans. It doesn't matter how long it takes you as a man to become financially capable of marrying, make sure you are before you are married. It may take 1 year, 10 or 20 years: this life is not a competition. And it is highly irresponsible of you to try to marry and produce children when you are not economically equipped to do so. You end up producing materialistic girls that tax prospective suitors out of their mind, and boys that are subjected to the kind of hussle that their fathers should have done.
5) Yes, money is pretty much everything. It is only a freakishly rich man or woman who is qualified to say money is not everything. You may think it is not everything, but it damn well answers all things.
6) This is my last point on this. There are no rules for relationship or marriage. Each lady you meet as a man is different from the last. So, be kind enough to treat them with respect, of course until they mess up and show you that they are not deserving of that respect. We all have met great girls who give no rat's ass how much you have, and they are only interested in your vision. So, can we cut down on the stereotypes against women? Shall we?
And no, I ain't married either, but this hasn't stopped me from meeting some great ladies. And yes, I have had nasty experience with Nigerian babes. The entitlement mentally is almost strictly a Nigerian thing (some, not all though, but a significant 'some'). Many of the European girls I know would get offended if you even as much as try to pay for their meal.

Good luck searching for Ms Right.

Impostor:
Hello NLders

I just want to share my experience. I want people to learn from others.

So recently I started dating and meeting women with the mindset of getting married as everyone around me keep shouting that I am getting overripe. Some are even wondering if everything is ok downstairs lol. How can you not be married up till now? You know those types of comments. But how could I have gotten married when unemployment no release me until 36? Nigeria is something else. It was at that age that I finally landed a decent job. I am even lucky to be where I am now.

So many youths are underemployed/under paid. Less than a month ago, a good friend who is also my course mate messaged me to express his frustration at teaching somewhere for 50k and he said he's now ready to make money anyhow even if it will take someone's blood . It's just a threat out of frustration.

The problem now is that I don't know if there are still good women like our mothers in this country. I have met so many young girls that I have stopped trying, the quest and hunger of these girls for money is just too much.

You are unemployed and you want me to buy you an iPhone of 150,000 Naira and she was making so much noise about it. Meanwhile I use a phone of 30k lol. Almost all the ladies I am meeting are unemployed and expensive. I met one girl awaiting NYSC, she told me straight up, that I will have to be taking care of her, that she's tired of dating broke guys so she has decided that any man she wants to date will have to be responsible for her completely. It sounded like a transaction. Though she's a very pretty, tall girl but I am not even after all those facial beauty.

Another lady told me she has half of her rent and she's looking for the remaining half. The stories are so many, I could write a book with them. I don't even know how to get working class ladies. But I have now realized that Nigerian ladies are not even the problem, it's the economy. Many young ladies are struggling just like guys and the only way they can meet up with their bills is by dating 3/4 guys.


Advise from my experience.

After my NYSC, over 10 years ago, I had this mind set that I won't get married without a job or funds to take proper care of my family. I think that mindset MAY be wrong, so many people still think this way.

I will advise you look at it again because it may take you 15/20 years after University to become comfortable (not your portion). Let me be sincere with you, this Nigeria is getting worse by the day especially with the type of leaders we have, who think only of themselves and their families/tribe.

For example, you can see for yourself what is happening with the outbreak of Corona Virus in the country. After 2 infection, people started advising that we should stop foreign flights, they refused until so many infected people got into the country, now they are running up&down. If we are lucky to get good leaders after now, it may take another 30 years of continuous good leadership to save Nigeria.

My advise is that after your NYSC, if you have a supportive family and a good/understanding girl friend, just marry her and start your family. You two will Hussle together and God will bless your hustle. You may ask why? Because most people finish around 25. If it takes you 10 years to become stable and get married, if you are lucky, you will have your first child at 36, 37. By the time you are 50, your child will be in junior secondary.

Be wise money is not everything.

After I graduated at 24 I picked up a skills to raise money and go into busness and at 25 my gf got pregnant and that make me venture into busness from the money have raise because I know those small salary can’t raise a family so I have to be hard working to make my family conformtable all I can say is most graduate are lazy and all wanna be inside the office which can’t work in Nigeria .
You will give up on something’s to build a comfortable family at least for ur kids .

seanwilliam:
This life sha, as young guy like me wey no get stable source of income now, how e one take be?? And most naija girls are broke . I dont even have problem with dem being broke, the problem is their entitlement mentality....
Well as I dey so, I no fit kill myself atall, I go enjoy myself well well for this bachelor, and I go marry when I'm comfortable.. I no fit kon start my life with suffer suffer.. if I get this degree finish, na to travel go Scandinavian countries go do masters and find one shima, give am beta belle make she give me beta pikin..
.
To people that are ready for marriage, no matter how, you still have to be comfortable small before you go consider settling down.. e better not to marry atall than to marry and begin to suffer yourself, yourwife and your innocent children..
.
Afterall jesus no marry now.
If pressure too much on u, then become a baby daddy.. atleast you don get seed for ground..
Also if you are not really ready for marriage, there is no point in dating naija girls cos most of dem will just suck u financially, emotionally, materially and other ally
I no sure say this country get hope again..


.

P.s. to anyone reading this my ranting abeg make una begin husle earlier ooo.. if you hit better money once, use am build house first.. after that one find beta investment and continue with your husle..

Do anything wey fit give you money , it might sound crazy, but no one is going to ask u how u take make money except SARS and Efcc.. ..
Afterall, orijin is a wonderful brand..
Aro1
Nextd18

Nice one padi mi