₦airaland Forum

Ancestral power at work, like father like son, like mother like daughter

Oga just make up your mind finally, that is, to stay in marriage OR Not to stay! Nobody can really advise you as such. If your decision is to leave the marriage, formalize the divorce and move on . But cater for your child.

PeacenLove2:
Yes she lied, yes she makes poor decisions and yes she is like many women of today, she won't be talked down and that's not necessarily a bad thing.

OP, you have a very bad habit of holding on to the past. You have a problem forgiving people which would never make you be able to appreciate whatever good comes your way. People who don't forgive have a hard time finding happiness because they are stuck in hate and their past.

I cannot tell you what to do now. I will never be a vessel to be used to destroy any union. You will make whatever decision pleases you. Whatever you do, don't let your innocent child take the heat.

I can only advise that you man up, discuss freely and fairly with your wife. You two can try meeting half way and compromise. Discuss future plans and let each party see for themselves if truly there is a future together or not. Most importantly, learn to forgive and also take responsibility. She lied, she is old, she pressured for sex and marriage. Oga, you sef take responsibility where obvious. Too much immaturity in adults these days, it's just so incredible. God hep you, sir.

Great Counsellor!
I am sure you can convince God to forgive Satan!

James4bright:
Let that woman go and give your son the future he deserves.

How did you think this one they were forcing into marriage in 2weeks will give child a better life



Your life anyway,I ran out of advice for slow ones.

Chai! this guy self, how can sambady just received u with common prophesy blablabla n u fall. Tommorow now Satan himself will brain wash into Hell n u will just follow.
PARK WELL Jareh.

Remember what the Bible say concerning marriage... .

prophetess

shineeye1:
Great Counsellor!
I am sure you can convince God to forgive Satan!

Typical

I exclaimed oh my goodness after reading the write up.

You met her & in two weeks you were talked into marriage without proper background check? wow! Two wrongs can't. a right. Forgive her, encourage her to go to school & build a future for herself & the family. Divorce is never the way forward as it's not right in the sight of God, and above all, you both need Jesus in your life. It's simple. ABC, Accept, believe & confess& you're there.

skedman:
You don't no what you have many people are looking for it .
You will just destroy your future
You married an ogbanje woman
Instead of you to study her and tolerate her you are forming divorce
You married your mother a prophetess .

O ye e ju

So you want her to remain unmarried. You said you are a 33 years old YOUNG MAN. So what is the matter that you found out she is a 33 year old young woman? So who will now marry her, you don't want her to marry? If you marry the woman of your dreams, who will marry her? No, she must join you into her wahala and carry you too, you guys are not serious. Is she a trash bin? Better swallow it and stay married.

But seriously , jokes aside, I'm sorry o, hope you find your way out. She shouldn't have lied. Thats a bad thing to do.

psucc:
Except you have never committed sin, I will advice you go on with the divorce. But if you have, even for once, try and forgive her. She must have played that game to quit single.

Again, if you can accomidate her, yöu can as well build her into her own dream. Millions are married to illitrates and still build great homes.

Remember, you swore to an oath to love her till the end.

The evil you wish others...

It will end in tears.

I advise you to do the needful. That's the common advice here

33-27=6 trying to solve this simple math

Lordsonn:
Greetings to you all. I want to go straight to the point. I opened this account because of my marital problems.

From the day I met my wife, she was after marriage. In less than two weeks of meeting her, she started pressurizing me to meet her family members which I succumbed to.

These are what she told me at the beginning of the relationship:

1) She had HND from Kaduna Polytechnics
2) She has Diploma in Computer Science
3) She is a professional cake baker
4) She was three months pregnant
5) That she was 27 years

My discoveries after marriage:

1) She doesn’t have any HND, infact no good WAEC result
2) She cannot even connect laptop to printer and print. She don’t know much about computer at all.
3) She doesn’t know how to bake cake. I discovered that the cake I asked her to bake for me, she gave the contract to her friend.
4) She was never pregnant. She had fibroid and that made her tummy big
5) She was 33 years.

NOTE: the reasons why I believed all she told me at the beginning was because she was a prophetess in her church. She speaks in tongues and prophesy many times and most of the prophecies came to pass.

I was even surprised that in less than two weeks of our relationship, she made move for sex and we started having sex. I did not even think of pre-marital sex because I thought she was a holy woman.

The problems after marriage: several people began to beg me to forgive her and continue with the marriage. I find it difficult but she was still living in my house. I was just being forced my her family and her family members persuaded some of my family members to beg me too. I tried to love her but hatred for her was just building in my heart.

The fibroid surgery was successfully done and she got pregnant and gave birth to a baby boy. I thought the coming of the child may make me to forgive her but I could not recover from her betrayal. I even hate her more.

She wrote WAEC last session and got nine credits but the memory of her betrayal is giving me a lot of psychological trauma. I love an educated woman and cannot see myself glued to an illiterate woman in the name of marriage.

Major problems that made me sent her out:

1) She refused to go to my church. She always want to go to her church and even want me to join her there which I refused.
2) She doesn’t like education at all. She hate going to school and will never carry book to read.
3) Anytime I have disagreement with her, she will call her elder brother. And they will come and talk to me, sometimes in a very condescending manner
4) She is not submissive, very arrogant and talks with anger, authoritatively.
5) She is a societal woman, she loves joining several associations of women and be going to meetings every sunday which I don't like.
6) She value clothes more than human being. She can use any money from the family purse to buy Hollandis, lase, George etc just to dress to her church for show off. I am introvert but she is extremely extrovert.

I sent her out of my house three weeks ago. She is trying to come back in the disguise that she doesn’t want her child to be only one, that it will make the child suffer in the future but I told her I cannot allow her to my house again. I love my little child and I cannot live with such a woman who is full of lies and pretense. I just have hatred for such kind of people.

What do you think I should do?

Baba, why did you marry her in the first place?

psucc:
Except you have never committed sin, I will advice you go on with the divorce. But if you have, even for once, try and forgive her. She must have played that game to quit single.

Again, if you can accomidate her, yöu can as well build her into her own dream. Millions are married to illitrates and still build great homes.

Remember, you swore to an oath to love her till the end.

please, stop talking about any oath when you are advising people on marriage or don't give any advice at all . Are you not in this country or have you not been reading the news ? The number of women and men who have got killed by their spouses trying to keep " nonsense oath " thereby keeping a bad marriage/ relationship cannot be count . please, that's no longer relevant . The OP should divorce this disloyal woman since hatred has set in .

memnon37:
As much as I hate typing so much mr man you have problems with unforgiveness it was bad she lied to you and you now know, let it go and move on with your lives. She had fibroid she has operated it and it's out and now you have a boy, she isn't educated but she has written waec with 9 credits wHich shows prospects that she is intelligent and all this rumble about you sending her out just shows you can't forgive which is tantamount for STAYING MARRIED oga if I had cane I'll flog you. Go and get your wife back forgive her and move on with your life have you not read where it's writhen. ..forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us.

If he doesn't check that attitude of his, he won't be able to keep a wife because it will always be a matter of time before the next and the next offends him and he won't be able to forgive. Marry 100 wives, each of them will have their own faults. If only he was perfect too, so self righteous and faultless. Somebody else is always responsible for his actions.

Lordsonn:
Greetings to you all. I want to go straight to the point. I opened this account because of my marital problems.

From the day I met my wife, she was after marriage. In less than two weeks of meeting her, she started pressurizing me to meet her family members which I succumbed to.

These are what she told me at the beginning of the relationship:

1) She had HND from Kaduna Polytechnics
2) She has Diploma in Computer Science
3) She is a professional cake baker
4) She was three months pregnant
5) That she was 27 years

My discoveries after marriage:

1) She doesn’t have any HND, infact no good WAEC result
2) She cannot even connect laptop to printer and print. She don’t know much about computer at all.
3) She doesn’t know how to bake cake. I discovered that the cake I asked her to bake for me, she gave the contract to her friend.
4) She was never pregnant. She had fibroid and that made her tummy big
5) She was 33 years.

NOTE: the reasons why I believed all she told me at the beginning was because she was a prophetess in her church. She speaks in tongues and prophesy many times and most of the prophecies came to pass.

I was even surprised that in less than two weeks of our relationship, she made move for sex and we started having sex. I did not even think of pre-marital sex because I thought she was a holy woman.

The problems after marriage: several people began to beg me to forgive her and continue with the marriage. I find it difficult but she was still living in my house. I was just being forced my her family and her family members persuaded some of my family members to beg me too. I tried to love her but hatred for her was just building in my heart.

The fibroid surgery was successfully done and she got pregnant and gave birth to a baby boy. I thought the coming of the child may make me to forgive her but I could not recover from her betrayal. I even hate her more.

She wrote WAEC last session and got nine credits but the memory of her betrayal is giving me a lot of psychological trauma. I love an educated woman and cannot see myself glued to an illiterate woman in the name of marriage.

Major problems that made me sent her out:

1) She refused to go to my church. She always want to go to her church and even want me to join her there which I refused.
2) She doesn’t like education at all. She hate going to school and will never carry book to read.
3) Anytime I have disagreement with her, she will call her elder brother. And they will come and talk to me, sometimes in a very condescending manner
4) She is not submissive, very arrogant and talks with anger, authoritatively.
5) She is a societal woman, she loves joining several associations of women and be going to meetings every sunday which I don't like.
6) She value clothes more than human being. She can use any money from the family purse to buy Hollandis, lase, George etc just to dress to her church for show off. I am introvert but she is extremely extrovert.

I sent her out of my house three weeks ago. She is trying to come back in the disguise that she doesn’t want her child to be only one, that it will make the child suffer in the future but I told her I cannot allow her to my house again. I love my little child and I cannot live with such a woman who is full of lies and pretense. I just have hatred for such kind of people.

What do you think I should do?

why do I read dis thread self..

Lordsonn:
Thanks. It is really affecting me. I am a lecturer in a private university, I lectured online yesterday via zoom, all the students and management discovered that something is wrong with me somewhere. I performed far below the way I used to lecture because i was really worried and depressed. I have another lecture by 4 pm today, I will try to look happy. They don't know what i'm passing through... i'm a young man of 33 years. the woman is even older than me, after i discovered her real age

Lordsonn
Except u posted this merely for educational purposes
Otherwise, I strongly feel ur pains ...

I had similar experiences@1989 with three friends. we all started life together then. Two of the marriages parted ways by@
1990/91 upon discoveries like yours. Things went well in the men life upon marriages to people they liked latter. they prospered as well.

the third guy that stayed with the patner continue to experience further lies and the woman continue to withdraw inward due to your identified weaknesses. the children don't really know who to trust between the father and mother. life was rough for the two. eventually they had to separate.

one really bad flaw you have identified is the fact that she refused to attend same church with you. she will always be shifty and can not trust you fully. she will also never obey you or encourage your children to obey you.

so you have your choice to make I have only help you to predict the future. Regards.

shineeye1:
Look here, forgiveness is never a right. It is dispensed through rigorous penitence of the offender. Not even God throws forgiveness at people!

True forgiveness brings about love and understanding. There is no perfect marriage, and nobody is perfect including the OP. Good communication, forgiveness and love gradually builds enduring marriage. Looking for another woman to marry may worsen the condition. Already there is a child; that is blessing!!! Please forgive your wife and mend your marriage. Divorce is not an option now!

Lordsonn:
Thanks. It is really affecting me. I am a lecturer in a private university, I lectured online yesterday via zoom, all the students and management discovered that something is wrong with me somewhere. I performed far below the way I used to lecture because i was really worried and depressed. I have another lecture by 4 pm today, I will try to look happy. They don't know what i'm passing through... i'm a young man of 33 years. the woman is even older than me, after i discovered her real age

U were too hasty into Marriage, they Spin you for Spirit?

It doesn't pay to be bluepilled. It pays to be redpilled. Take the redpill today. Op, in addition to these links, I will release my redpill series and topics starting from 1st of September.

https://www.nairaland.com/5695941/many-memes-redpill-guys-get

https://www.nairaland.com/5150034/boys-get-here-mumu-must


The posts below me should be heeded.

ichidodo:
[color=#1980BC] CIA and FBI combined cannot match up to a woman when it comes to manipulation, espionage and subterfuge... especially when potency to lead to marriage is involved... That's why we must involve our mothers or elderly aunties to investigate our potential mates as it only takes a woman to catch a woman...Next time don't be a simp...[/color]

Biglittlelois:
Lol all these guys going for churchy ladies thinking they are all saints, Pele, you've taken the first step which is separation, you can as well divorce her and have peace of mind.

The best word to describe you is a CONFUSIONIST... Ur story doesn't make sense to me.. Looks more like a Nollywood script

Lordsonn:
Greetings to you all. I want to go straight to the point. I opened this account because of my marital problems.

From the day I met my wife, she was after marriage. In less than two weeks of meeting her, she started pressurizing me to meet her family members which I succumbed to.

These are what she told me at the beginning of the relationship:

1) She had HND from Kaduna Polytechnics
2) She has Diploma in Computer Science
3) She is a professional cake baker
4) She was three months pregnant
5) That she was 27 years

My discoveries after marriage:

1) She doesn’t have any HND, infact no good WAEC result
2) She cannot even connect laptop to printer and print. She don’t know much about computer at all.
3) She doesn’t know how to bake cake. I discovered that the cake I asked her to bake for me, she gave the contract to her friend.
4) She was never pregnant. She had fibroid and that made her tummy big
5) She was 33 years.

NOTE: the reasons why I believed all she told me at the beginning was because she was a prophetess in her church. She speaks in tongues and prophesy many times and most of the prophecies came to pass.

I was even surprised that in less than two weeks of our relationship, she made move for sex and we started having sex. I did not even think of pre-marital sex because I thought she was a holy woman.

The problems after marriage: several people began to beg me to forgive her and continue with the marriage. I find it difficult but she was still living in my house. I was just being forced my her family and her family members persuaded some of my family members to beg me too. I tried to love her but hatred for her was just building in my heart.

The fibroid surgery was successfully done and she got pregnant and gave birth to a baby boy. I thought the coming of the child may make me to forgive her but I could not recover from her betrayal. I even hate her more.

She wrote WAEC last session and got nine credits but the memory of her betrayal is giving me a lot of psychological trauma. I love an educated woman and cannot see myself glued to an illiterate woman in the name of marriage.

Major problems that made me sent her out:

1) She refused to go to my church. She always want to go to her church and even want me to join her there which I refused.
2) She doesn’t like education at all. She hate going to school and will never carry book to read.
3) Anytime I have disagreement with her, she will call her elder brother. And they will come and talk to me, sometimes in a very condescending manner
4) She is not submissive, very arrogant and talks with anger, authoritatively.
5) She is a societal woman, she loves joining several associations of women and be going to meetings every sunday which I don't like.
6) She value clothes more than human being. She can use any money from the family purse to buy Hollandis, lase, George etc just to dress to her church for show off. I am introvert but she is extremely extrovert.

I sent her out of my house three weeks ago. She is trying to come back in the disguise that she doesn’t want her child to be only one, that it will make the child suffer in the future but I told her I cannot allow her to my house again. I love my little child and I cannot live with such a woman who is full of lies and pretense. I just have hatred for such kind of people.
[b]
What do you think I should do?[/b

More than 68 % of Nigerian women fall into this category of liars and they are in churches today. I know a Nigerian woman who lied to her husband that she is a lawyer but she never attended any university let alone a law school. They met during a church program, not only that she had a child as a young girl, she brought the girl to serve as a house help in their house and the husband never new until she deceived the man to marry her, they had children. The cat was let out of the bag when there was a job opening for a legal practioner and the husband ask for her certificate having been assured that she will be given the job, they found out that she did not attend a university let alone having a certificate, she pleaded for forgiveness but fled for over a year out of shame but came back later.

Bros sorry to say you’re stupid.
So you knew all this things and still impregnated her then after she gave birth to an innocent son who isn’t responsible for your predicament you’re now just thinking you will send her out. Once again you’re stupid.

Update on COVID-19, Please.

[quote author=Collinto001 post=89001047]Baba, what she did is in the past, you should for give her and turn her to the woman who want her to be.... SHE IS YOUR WIFE FOR GOODNESS SAKE NOT GIRLFRIEND. Make sure she's truly sorry for her wrongs and want to turn away from them.. That's what matters.

If you go and marry another woman..You may still have problem in future .. So, thank the Lord that you have discovered the problem with ur wife here...The Bible says HUSBAND LOVE YOUR WIFE.. (and that's a commandment not a suggestion .. do u love your wife?

OGand99others:

2255998505
Zenith bank

Man must survive

Thanks so much

I like this guy

If u've sent her out ready b4 seekin 4 advice.....dats ur prob

psucc:
Except you have never committed sin, I will advice you go on with the divorce. But if you have, even for once, try and forgive her. She must have played that game to quit single.

Again, if you can accomidate her, yöu can as well build her into her own dream. Millions are married to illitrates and still build great homes.

Remember, you swore to an oath to love her till the end.

Did I hear you say love till the end??
When you have been brutualized with lies and deceit? You're joking right? :-