₦airaland Forum

Divine89:
Hello everybody. I am Nigerian based in France. My English it is not 100% perfect but I will try to make it possible for you to understand me with the help of google french to English translator and my story is also long sorry for that.

When I was 9 years old I joined my uncle, my mum's younger brother in France. He declared me as his daughter. During that time he only had one child, 2 years old. He and the wife were so loving to me. I never lacked anything in their house.

But when I turned 12, I went to secondary school. I met some bad friends there. This is where the problem started.I became a very difficult child. I will go to school come home late. My uncle will beat and beat me but I never listened. I smoked my first cigarette at 12 and had my first sex at 13 and I started running away from home to stay with boyfriends. Sometimes I can go for a week and when uncle reporta me missing, the police will be looking for me, then they will bring me back home.

Then at 14 I went to school and lied to my teacher that my uncle was abusing me. I told them he was beating me with belts, electric wire, they don’t give me foods and I really said a lot of bad things about them doing to me to make my teacher believe my story so they could take me away from them because I wanted freedom and my teacher believed me and reported to the police and child protection, they are people who take away abused children from their parents. They took custody of me and my uncle three children, the youngest was 6 months old to their care and they gave us to this white lady to care for us and my uncle and wife were arrested for child abuse and the police were doing some investigation.

After spending 1yr 9 months in care of the white lady I dropped out school. They found out that I was a difficult child that I lied to get freedom so they have decided to give my uncle his children back to him while I stayed in care of white people but my uncle had sworn because I made him lost his children for 1yr 9 months that I will never found happiness in my life and I will never enjoy the fruit of my labour which it is true as I am typing this.

I have given birth to 6 children by 6 men and none of the children is living with me. The first one was taken away from me at 2 months old because I beat her up and fractured her hands and I also tested positive for heroinn (drugs), so that did not stop me from giving birth second child was removed from my care 4 hours after birth she also tested positive for heroin the same way my other children were removed at birth too so I carry on with my lifestyles. I did not care about my children at that time all I care about was sex, alcohol and drugs this is what I wanted and I have been to prison several times for selling drugs and fraudsters. The longest I have spent in prison was 2 years then after i left prison, I met with this sister who introduced me to this church she attended so I went along with her, the pastor told me to confess my sin to him and promised it will be a secret between I, him and God which I did repented and accepted Jesus as my saviour. To be honest, my life did changed a lot, I fell the peace in my heart , enjoyed going to church every Sunday but this pastor went tell his wife my life story and the wife told everyone in church my life story and started using it against me so it made me so angry that I left the church in November 2017 without looking back. I have decided not to attend any church again. I have stopped alcohol, taking drugs and sleeping with men I no longer do it. I prayed at home, read my bible and behaving good and it's almost 2 years I havnt slept with a man and i went to look for my uncle asking him for forgiveness but he has refused and I send him many text messages begging him to forgive and I still no heard anything from him or the wife even their children I have tried to ask them forgiveness they have blocked me and they all want nothing to do with me even my own parents and siblings in Africa they have rejected me, none of them want to talk to me, my parents said i am dead to them, it is so painful I cry everyday in my prayers, as for my children 4 of them are adopted with new family. I can't see them again maybe until they are 18 years old If they want to know me if they don't want I will have no choice to accept it and my 2 youngest children i am only allowed to see them once a year in a children play centre with someone supervise because they don't let me to be alone with them and soon I will stop visiting them because they are planning to adopt them to a new family too that will mean I will have nobody on this earth.

I regret my mistake so bad I wish I could change it but it will no be impossible. I can't have more children because they will be removed from me like the others and I am only 31years old. I don't know if my repentance was genius because my family has refused to forgive me and my question goes like this if they never forgive me will I ever found happiness again or I will just have to accept it until I died?

Please, advise me in a Christian way maybe if there's more I can do and also prayed for me so my family will be able to forgive me and also pray for my two children that nobody will adopt them so I can get custody of them and i promised to be a good mother to them, please I am begging you in the name of God.

Courage.

Tell any of ur uncle relative to beg him on ur be half

Millenniumlady:
Go let them know you're a change person so you can get you children back......Child support is not something to joke about you can build/buy a house from the cheque you'll be receiving from their dad's annually

Why are u even like this? What kind of person is this for God's sake. This woman was declared unfit to raise a child, if she has anymore children in the future they will be taken from her. You're now talking about her building house from the child support money if she gains custody. I swear I'm not insulting you or judging you, but why are you like that. Westerners believe that a drug user can never change. She can never, I repeat never gain custody of the children. Before she even sees them once in a month, she must get her life on track, good job, must be sober for at least 10 years and stable. OP I would advise you focus on building yourself, 31 is really not late to start over. You can do it!

Hmmm. Na wa o. Things dey happen for this world sha!

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this story is deep and I have had about French authority taken child from abusive parents and one of Nigeria ex footballer who abuse a.girl she adopted from Nigeria too was strip of the child and him and his wife was jailed for life. I don't knw if they still in France.

we that are advising you Here don't know if you have change truly as you claim to be.
if you are really change then try to join a church over there they can help you talk to your uncle again..and can keep giving you hope to have a reason for living.
being part of a goof church will help you see life differently than just being on yourself.


so I pray you get your Kidd back I have visited Paris i know there rules a lot.

so may God keep you safe in this pandemic season amen

Forgive yourself first, live in peace with yourself and God. And he'll restore everything in due process. You have to believe

Dangers of sending a child abroad at an early age

Divine89:
My children are in the custody of the french authorities, according to them I will never have custody of them till they reach 18 years old because I am an unfit mother. only God grace can help me to have them back. Thank you

What I'm about telling you might hurt. But it's the truth.

If your repentance is genuine,

Be thankful to the Almighty and for His Creation for letting you reap the fruits of your misdeeds while still here on earth thereby atoning for them.

The best you can do for yourself right now is to become good in both thoughts and deed. It's a new gradual maturing of the spirit. Not something that happens instantly.

If you can get jobs that tackle or help prevent young girls from taking the path you took as a young adolescent. That way, you atone faster.

You can also assist with children, help care for them.

Creation knows. Creation never forgets. Creation records. You will gradually lift up whatever curse that has fettered you.

Before you do this.
Have you forgiven yourself?
You have to forgive yourself first before the Almighty and his Creation and other people can.

Don't eat up yourself too much.

I will suggest you give yourself 100% of your attention. Work on being a really changed person inside out.

1.Can you go back to school? Anyone at all. Just so you can get a certificate that can get you a nice job able to take care of a child(ren).

Start from there.

2. Distance yourself from any bad influence, drug, smoking, alcohol, bad friends etc. Strive to live a normal and examolary life.

3. Keep your soul busy with God's word, you may or may not do this going to church, its your choice.

4. After you have earned a cert. And gotten a job. Give yourself time. Then go for your kids.

Or better still free them for now. Maybe they're in better hands. Just visit them to let them know you're their mum. But not to take them away. Unless where they're you don't think they're okay then you can fight for them to be given back to you.

5. If after All these, you feel lonely, you can start a relationship. But pls work on yourself before starting à New relationship. Our God is a God of second chance. He doesn't give up on us.

Remember you attract your type, who knows you may get yourself a good man, who is ready to build a family with you.

Then after all these, you can even start an NGO. through your NGO you can reach out to your uncle and family. If they read about your good works and commitment, your changes person. They may give a listening ear and consider forgiving you. God bless you.

Wish you well.

God pls help your daughter.. .

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A man was sleeping at night in his cabin when suddenly his room filled with light, and God appeared. The Lord told the man he had work for him to do, and showed him a large rock in front of his cabin. The Lord explained that the man was to push against the rock with all his might.So, this the man did, day after day.For many years he toiled from sun upto sundown, his shoulders set squarely against the cold, massive surface of the unmoving rock, pushing with all of his might. Each night the man returned to his cabin sore and worn out, feeling that his whole day had been spent in vain.Since the man was showing discouragement, the Adversary (Satan) decided to enter the picture by placing thoughts into the weary mind: “You have been pushing against that rock for a long time, and it hasn’t moved.
”“You have been pushing against that rock for a long time, and it hasn’t moved.
Thus, he gave the man the impression that the task was impossible and that he was a failure. These thoughts discouraged and disheartened the man.Satan said, “Why kill yourself over this? Just put in your time, giving just the minimum effort; and that will be good enough.”That’s what the weary man planned to do, but decided to make it a matter of prayer and to take his troubled thoughts to the Lord. “Lord,”he said, “I have labored long and hard in your service, putting all my strength to do that which you have asked. Yet, after all this time, I have not even budged that rock by half a millimeter. What is wrong? Why am I failing?”What is wrong? Why am I failing?The Lord responded compassionately, “My friend, when I asked you to serve Me and you accepted, I told you that your task was to push against the rock with all of your strength, which you have done. Never once did I mention to you that I expected you to move it. Your task was to push.And now you come to Me with your strength spent, thinking that you have failed. But, is that really so? Look at yourself. Your arms are strong and muscled, your back sinewy and brown; your hands are callused from constant pressure, your legs have become massive and hard. Through opposition you have grown much, and your abilities now surpass that which you used to have. True, you haven’t moved the rock. But your calling was to be obedient and to push and to exercise your faith and trust in My wisdom. That you have done. Now I, my friend, will move the rock.”At times, when we hear a word from God, we tend to use our own intellect to decipher what He wants, when actually what God wants is just a simple obedience and faith in Him. By all means, exercise the faith that moves mountains, but know that it is still God who moves mountains.When everything seems to go wrong .just P.U.S.H.!
When your family turns their back against you … just P.U.S.H.!
When people don’t react the way you think they should … just P.U.S.H!
When your money is “gone” and the bills are due….just P.U.S.H!
When people just don’t understand you, just P.U.S.H.P= PrayU= UntilS= SomethingH= Happens.



Don't give up yet, Christ has not abandoned you.


As long as you've asked for forgiveness with a contrite spirit.


Your healing and upliftment is on the way

Divine89:
Hello everybody. I am Nigerian based in France. My English it is not 100% perfect but I will try to make it possible for you to understand me with the help of google french to English translator and my story is also long sorry for that.

When I was 9 years old I joined my uncle, my mum's younger brother in France. He declared me as his daughter. During that time he only had one child, 2 years old. He and the wife were so loving to me. I never lacked anything in their house.

But when I turned 12, I went to secondary school. I met some bad friends there. This is where the problem started.I became a very difficult child. I will go to school come home late. My uncle will beat and beat me but I never listened. I smoked my first cigarette at 12 and had my first sex at 13 and I started running away from home to stay with boyfriends. Sometimes I can go for a week and when uncle reporta me missing, the police will be looking for me, then they will bring me back home.

Then at 14 I went to school and lied to my teacher that my uncle was abusing me. I told them he was beating me with belts, electric wire, they don’t give me foods and I really said a lot of bad things about them doing to me to make my teacher believe my story so they could take me away from them because I wanted freedom and my teacher believed me and reported to the police and child protection, they are people who take away abused children from their parents. They took custody of me and my uncle three children, the youngest was 6 months old to their care and they gave us to this white lady to care for us and my uncle and wife were arrested for child abuse and the police were doing some investigation.

After spending 1yr 9 months in care of the white lady I dropped out school. They found out that I was a difficult child that I lied to get freedom so they have decided to give my uncle his children back to him while I stayed in care of white people but my uncle had sworn because I made him lost his children for 1yr 9 months that I will never found happiness in my life and I will never enjoy the fruit of my labour which it is true as I am typing this.

I have given birth to 6 children by 6 men and none of the children is living with me. The first one was taken away from me at 2 months old because I beat her up and fractured her hands and I also tested positive for heroinn (drugs), so that did not stop me from giving birth second child was removed from my care 4 hours after birth she also tested positive for heroin the same way my other children were removed at birth too so I carry on with my lifestyles. I did not care about my children at that time all I care about was sex, alcohol and drugs this is what I wanted and I have been to prison several times for selling drugs and fraudsters. The longest I have spent in prison was 2 years then after i left prison, I met with this sister who introduced me to this church she attended so I went along with her, the pastor told me to confess my sin to him and promised it will be a secret between I, him and God which I did repented and accepted Jesus as my saviour. To be honest, my life did changed a lot, I fell the peace in my heart , enjoyed going to church every Sunday but this pastor went tell his wife my life story and the wife told everyone in church my life story and started using it against me so it made me so angry that I left the church in November 2017 without looking back. I have decided not to attend any church again. I have stopped alcohol, taking drugs and sleeping with men I no longer do it. I prayed at home, read my bible and behaving good and it's almost 2 years I havnt slept with a man and i went to look for my uncle asking him for forgiveness but he has refused and I send him many text messages begging him to forgive and I still no heard anything from him or the wife even their children I have tried to ask them forgiveness they have blocked me and they all want nothing to do with me even my own parents and siblings in Africa they have rejected me, none of them want to talk to me, my parents said i am dead to them, it is so painful I cry everyday in my prayers, as for my children 4 of them are adopted with new family. I can't see them again maybe until they are 18 years old If they want to know me if they don't want I will have no choice to accept it and my 2 youngest children i am only allowed to see them once a year in a children play centre with someone supervise because they don't let me to be alone with them and soon I will stop visiting them because they are planning to adopt them to a new family too that will mean I will have nobody on this earth.

I regret my mistake so bad I wish I could change it but it will no be impossible. I can't have more children because they will be removed from me like the others and I am only 31years old. I don't know if my repentance was genius because my family has refused to forgive me and my question goes like this if they never forgive me will I ever found happiness again or I will just have to accept it until I died?

Please, advise me in a Christian way maybe if there's more I can do and also prayed for me so my family will be able to forgive me and also pray for my two children that nobody will adopt them so I can get custody of them and i promised to be a good mother to them, please I am begging you in the name of God.

Your case is not the worst case I have heard so far so don't give up. As a leader in the body of Christ I have heard a lot. However, I thank God you have amended your ways. That means there's great hope for you. I sincerely apologize on behalf of the pastor and the church that couldn't find a place for you. God is not interested in your past but the life your are ready to live today. Your yesterday is gone, mistakes made already, can't be reversed but you can begin to plan for your tomorrow. If you have tried all you can to reach out to those you offended but they are unwilling to forgive you, let it go. If they are still judging you because of your past mistakes, present the future to yourself and move on. There's no man that is without mistakes. I know they are offended badly, but your mistakes did more damage to your life than those you offended. Continually have have a real fellowship with Jesus and he will guide you on what to do. Return back to church, not the one you once attended, you are not serving pastors or any church leader but Jesus. He sees your heart

Divine89, you have done well by turning a new leaf. To be honest with you, nobody will take you back. If they do, you will find life more difficult than what you have now. The best thing is that you continued to seek for forgiveness and if they don't forgive you, it's not their fault. You caused it.
So, continue to be have a relationship with God.
I will advise that you change environment, learn a new skill and find new friends to make your family. Please and please, don't give birth to any more kids. Go and do a hysterectomy (sterilization) immediately.

There are people whose stories are not as bad as yours who do no have anyone in this world anymore, some people for no faults of theirs. So, you can move on too. Don't let the system and your past push you to suicide.

Send me a message, if you don't mind. I lived in Europe and I can relate a bit.

If only you could change the hands of time...

olawonder:
Approach a mosque near you, take the oat of reverting back to Almighty Allah, start a new life in Islam. Inshallah all past sins shall be forgiven! But there’s a lot of work to do, you still have to right as many wrongs as you possibly can.

The Christian way you took didn’t work out, it wouldn’t. Don’t let any bogus faith mongers tell you once you accept someone as your ‘personal saviour’ and confess your sins to them everything is cool... all salvations come from only Allah, and we must bear responsibility for all our actions through sacrifice and great efforts in life before death.

After all these, you should emerse yourself in the worship of Allah and follow all other beliefs system in Islam. The most important thing is that realization of mistakes comes and you are here to let everything out (though you’re not to confess sins to none other than God). Don’t despair in the mercy of God, hasten to Him and i pray that Allah forgive you, me and all humans who swayed but turn back to Him.

Chukwu Aju!

She has found solace in Jesus.

Liars.
Believe the nonsense at your own peril

OP, no amount of repentance or whatever can undo the damage you had done, put ur hand in fire, God himself will not stop the fire from roasting ur hand, its good you have realized your mistakes, I suggest you calm down and pay for it soberly, after paying in full, you may have some redemption and life goes on, looking at the bright side, you can even start a teen ministry using your experience to guide others.

If this story is indeed real and you have turned a new leaf, drop phone number of your uncle for nairalanders in their hundreds to beg him on your behalf and any other person you remember offending.

aeion:
Dis à Dieu que tu as personnellement péché contre lui en actes, en pensées, et en paroles. Le pardon est une relation avec Dieu; par la prière, nous pouvons également amener les autres à pardonner.

Pourquoi n'écris-tu pas dans une langue que tout le monde ici comprend?

I read through your story..... honestly i didn't understand why you did to your uncle and his family.....is bygone anyway...

here's my advice dear......you have done the mistake.....but yours is good... because you were able to feel that godly sorrow to turn away from the evil ways......

Decide what you want.....are you truly repented? have you been baptized?....do you trust in the arm of God that he can do all things?

if yes ....then seek for council from God....let him direct you.

lastly you need people over there who has seen the changes in you to help you in getting your kids back.... because those kids are your blood despite your evil doings...

you need to be an example for others...

you can visit this church in France they will help you.....

The church of Jesus Christ of latter-day saints

you will be glad you did

thanks and may God help you

Hello Divine 89,

Your story is truly touching. However, I'm most excited about the change that's occurred in your heart. I want to assure you that God has forgiven you. If you go to the books of God right now, He does not have records of those things you just told us. He has forgiven you. And, I'm happy about this. He actually expects your uncle and other family members to forgive you too, but you know, they were deeply hurt. So, give them time; they'll come around. Trust me. Continue reaching out to them time to time to prove to them that you've changed.

A lot of people have advised you on this thread. Filter them, and take the good advices and ignore the insults.

These are the things I feel you should do:

1. Please and please, don't turn your back on God, no matter what.

2. Make sure you eventually get your uncle's forgiveness. Use someone or the authorities to appeal to him if that's possible in France. Your uncle and your family, with time, will definitely get over their anger.

3. Register with an addiction program. This will help you keep a clean slate and avoid a relapse.

4. As you're working now, save and plan towards going back to school in the nearest future, that is if you've not started already.

5. Change you circle of friends. If you can find a genuine christian, it'll help you. God will show you his mercy and send such a friend your way.God have me one.

Beyond this thread, is there a way you can be reached? Would you want some of us to be around you? I'm sure there are people who will want to see that you go through this period and come out strong. You did touch people's hearts.

Concerning your children, God will grant your heart desires. Some of us will help you in prayers

God will certainly hear and help you. He doesn't reject a contrite heart

You are cursed person sister even if you repent it won’t break ur curse and punishment that follows

Pray to God for forgiveness and guidance. He will forgive you..... secondly u don't need to tell anyone your mistakes. Just meet those u offended and ask for their pardon and then cry unto God.

Divine89:
Hello everybody. I am Nigerian based in France. My English it is not 100% perfect but I will try to make it possible for you to understand me with the help of google french to English translator and my story is also long sorry for that.

When I was 9 years old I joined my uncle, my mum's younger brother in France. He declared me as his daughter. During that time he only had one child, 2 years old. He and the wife were so loving to me. I never lacked anything in their house.

But when I turned 12, I went to secondary school. I met some bad friends there. This is where the problem started.I became a very difficult child. I will go to school come home late. My uncle will beat and beat me but I never listened. I smoked my first cigarette at 12 and had my first sex at 13 and I started running away from home to stay with boyfriends. Sometimes I can go for a week and when uncle reporta me missing, the police will be looking for me, then they will bring me back home.

Then at 14 I went to school and lied to my teacher that my uncle was abusing me. I told them he was beating me with belts, electric wire, they don’t give me foods and I really said a lot of bad things about them doing to me to make my teacher believe my story so they could take me away from them because I wanted freedom and my teacher believed me and reported to the police and child protection, they are people who take away abused children from their parents. They took custody of me and my uncle three children, the youngest was 6 months old to their care and they gave us to this white lady to care for us and my uncle and wife were arrested for child abuse and the police were doing some investigation.

After spending 1yr 9 months in care of the white lady I dropped out school. They found out that I was a difficult child that I lied to get freedom so they have decided to give my uncle his children back to him while I stayed in care of white people but my uncle had sworn because I made him lost his children for 1yr 9 months that I will never found happiness in my life and I will never enjoy the fruit of my labour which it is true as I am typing this.

I have given birth to 6 children by 6 men and none of the children is living with me. The first one was taken away from me at 2 months old because I beat her up and fractured her hands and I also tested positive for heroinn (drugs), so that did not stop me from giving birth second child was removed from my care 4 hours after birth she also tested positive for heroin the same way my other children were removed at birth too so I carry on with my lifestyles. I did not care about my children at that time all I care about was sex, alcohol and drugs this is what I wanted and I have been to prison several times for selling drugs and fraudsters. The longest I have spent in prison was 2 years then after i left prison, I met with this sister who introduced me to this church she attended so I went along with her, the pastor told me to confess my sin to him and promised it will be a secret between I, him and God which I did repented and accepted Jesus as my saviour. To be honest, my life did changed a lot, I fell the peace in my heart , enjoyed going to church every Sunday but this pastor went tell his wife my life story and the wife told everyone in church my life story and started using it against me so it made me so angry that I left the church in November 2017 without looking back. I have decided not to attend any church again. I have stopped alcohol, taking drugs and sleeping with men I no longer do it. I prayed at home, read my bible and behaving good and it's almost 2 years I havnt slept with a man and i went to look for my uncle asking him for forgiveness but he has refused and I send him many text messages begging him to forgive and I still no heard anything from him or the wife even their children I have tried to ask them forgiveness they have blocked me and they all want nothing to do with me even my own parents and siblings in Africa they have rejected me, none of them want to talk to me, my parents said i am dead to them, it is so painful I cry everyday in my prayers, as for my children 4 of them are adopted with new family. I can't see them again maybe until they are 18 years old If they want to know me if they don't want I will have no choice to accept it and my 2 youngest children i am only allowed to see them once a year in a children play centre with someone supervise because they don't let me to be alone with them and soon I will stop visiting them because they are planning to adopt them to a new family too that will mean I will have nobody on this earth.

I regret my mistake so bad I wish I could change it but it will no be impossible. I can't have more children because they will be removed from me like the others and I am only 31years old. I don't know if my repentance was genius because my family has refused to forgive me and my question goes like this if they never forgive me will I ever found happiness again or I will just have to accept it until I died?

Please, advise me in a Christian way maybe if there's more I can do and also prayed for me so my family will be able to forgive me and also pray for my two children that nobody will adopt them so I can get custody of them and i promised to be a good mother to them, please I am begging you in the name of God.

what is advise is a christian way?have you repented genuinely?have you really found jesus Christ as your Lord and saviour?if not there is nothing any advise can do to you.break yourself before your maker let God himself remould your life break your pride and ego and seek for the real liberty from God.after doing this seek God's help to help you break the curse you had gotten from the lies you made and from making another man to cry.commit the heart of that your uncle into God's hand and see what the Lord can do about it.even the children that are of different fathers God can make good of their lives.I have seen a woman of such today she has upto 10 children from different fathers but after giving her life to Jesus and serving God genuinely all of her children did well infact They are so blessed.but it takes you being ready for a change and seek God for help

But u didnt tell us the person that disflower you how old is him then

Righteousness89:
Deep... really Deep.

My Sister, My Bible tells me that " For all have sinned and Come Short of the Glory of GOD"

If there is sin, there is also Mercy!

Praise GOD You are still alive because it's only the Living that can obtain Mercy. Irrespective of all You have done and those who have looked down on you and Disowned you due to your dirty past, There is a Loving FATHER who is Available to Receive you , Purge you ,Clean you up and Make you the most adorable.

HIS Name is JESUS CHRIST..

Man can fail you
Pastor can fail you
Parents can Disown and Fail u
Uncle and aunties can fail u



I see you being a Great light of JOY Soonest

Na so una dey see but nobody saw covid-19


On the other hand people too fail themselves.

This is the most interesting thing I read today...

Divine89:
Hello everybody. I am Nigerian based in France. My English it is not 100% perfect but I will try to make it possible for you to understand me with the help of google french to English translator and my story is also long sorry for that.

When I was 9 years old I joined my uncle, my mum's younger brother in France. He declared me as his daughter. During that time he only had one child, 2 years old. He and the wife were so loving to me. I never lacked anything in their house.

But when I turned 12, I went to secondary school. I met some bad friends there. This is where the problem started.I became a very difficult child. I will go to school come home late. My uncle will beat and beat me but I never listened. I smoked my first cigarette at 12 and had my first sex at 13 and I started running away from home to stay with boyfriends. Sometimes I can go for a week and when uncle reporta me missing, the police will be looking for me, then they will bring me back home.

Then at 14 I went to school and lied to my teacher that my uncle was abusing me. I told them he was beating me with belts, electric wire, they don’t give me foods and I really said a lot of bad things about them doing to me to make my teacher believe my story so they could take me away from them because I wanted freedom and my teacher believed me and reported to the police and child protection, they are people who take away abused children from their parents. They took custody of me and my uncle three children, the youngest was 6 months old to their care and they gave us to this white lady to care for us and my uncle and wife were arrested for child abuse and the police were doing some investigation.

After spending 1yr 9 months in care of the white lady I dropped out school. They found out that I was a difficult child that I lied to get freedom so they have decided to give my uncle his children back to him while I stayed in care of white people but my uncle had sworn because I made him lost his children for 1yr 9 months that I will never found happiness in my life and I will never enjoy the fruit of my labour which it is true as I am typing this.

I have given birth to 6 children by 6 men and none of the children is living with me. The first one was taken away from me at 2 months old because I beat her up and fractured her hands and I also tested positive for heroinn (drugs), so that did not stop me from giving birth second child was removed from my care 4 hours after birth she also tested positive for heroin the same way my other children were removed at birth too so I carry on with my lifestyles. I did not care about my children at that time all I care about was sex, alcohol and drugs this is what I wanted and I have been to prison several times for selling drugs and fraudsters. The longest I have spent in prison was 2 years then after i left prison, I met with this sister who introduced me to this church she attended so I went along with her, the pastor told me to confess my sin to him and promised it will be a secret between I, him and God which I did repented and accepted Jesus as my saviour. To be honest, my life did changed a lot, I fell the peace in my heart , enjoyed going to church every Sunday but this pastor went tell his wife my life story and the wife told everyone in church my life story and started using it against me so it made me so angry that I left the church in November 2017 without looking back. I have decided not to attend any church again. I have stopped alcohol, taking drugs and sleeping with men I no longer do it. I prayed at home, read my bible and behaving good and it's almost 2 years I havnt slept with a man and i went to look for my uncle asking him for forgiveness but he has refused and I send him many text messages begging him to forgive and I still no heard anything from him or the wife even their children I have tried to ask them forgiveness they have blocked me and they all want nothing to do with me even my own parents and siblings in Africa they have rejected me, none of them want to talk to me, my parents said i am dead to them, it is so painful I cry everyday in my prayers, as for my children 4 of them are adopted with new family. I can't see them again maybe until they are 18 years old If they want to know me if they don't want I will have no choice to accept it and my 2 youngest children i am only allowed to see them once a year in a children play centre with someone supervise because they don't let me to be alone with them and soon I will stop visiting them because they are planning to adopt them to a new family too that will mean I will have nobody on this earth.

I regret my mistake so bad I wish I could change it but it will no be impossible. I can't have more children because they will be removed from me like the others and I am only 31years old. I don't know if my repentance was genius because my family has refused to forgive me and my question goes like this if they never forgive me will I ever found happiness again or I will just have to accept it until I died?

Please, advise me in a Christian way maybe if there's more I can do and also prayed for me so my family will be able to forgive me and also pray for my two children that nobody will adopt them so I can get custody of them and i promised to be a good mother to them, please I am begging you in the name of God.

For you to pour all these shows you must have changed in many ways. In life, some people have to go through difficult situations to make them change for the better. Some will go to jail for many years and while released with still go back to their old ways of life, and again get sent back to prison. Some people will require more than second chance to realize their past mistakes. You seem to fall into this category.
Am not going to blame you for all you did in the past to your uncle. You were too tenderly young when you were shipped away from your parents off to an uncle in Europe... that was the first mistake of your parents! In their minds they were doing the right thing by letting you go, what they did not realize is Europe is a free land. You are so free to do whatever and make as many mistakes that can even cost you your life. There are many government agencies working hard to ensure that “trouble” kids are taking away from their parents and guardians for little mistakes so they can remain relevant professionally and thus keep their own economy going. Peer pressure is strong in all societies, but way stronger in advanced societies! It takes strong and committed parents with prayers to have well trained children in these parts of the world.
I must commend you for your sincere repentance from your junkie life. Now is the time to proof your genuineness by engaging yourself in self development programs. You need to be a part of any organization that is into helping people... this is important so you can remain grounded and not relapse. Trust me you are still very young and can still contribute meaningfully to your society.
Regarding your uncle and his family, you can not force them back into your life, they can never forget what you made them go through, but keep praying for them and praising God on their behalf. One day, if they hear or see you have really changed, they might cautiously allow you back into their. For your parents, you must keep trying until you are able to talk to them, let them know how much you have changed and ask them to forgive you if they can. Tell them to keep praying for you.
As you already know that in order to get your remaining 2 kids back from the government, you must proof that you have changed a great deal! You have a stable job and life. It’s takes time but it’s in your hands. You can do it! I will be here rooting for you!

Divine89:
Thank you very much for the prayer I receive and believe in Jesus name . I am hard working , i work 2 jobs cleaning, one in the morning and the other in the afternoon. As I am typing I am at my second job I will finish at 7pm

I feel sympathy for you dear. I know God to be a God that mends destinies. There is nothing like too late or too bad or too messed up with him.
I will suggest fasting and prayers because this exercise helps me a lot when it feels like my life is in many different scattered pieces. Prayers and fasting helps me with strength, hope and faith that God has my back and I can't be blown away by contrary winds! Keep strengthening your relationship with God. He is a Rewriter of destinies! Hallelujah.

Yet getting married to a lady at 18 people say child abuse. What of this one? What do we call her??

i am not religious i anywhy, in life you reap what you sow. dont complain when you are reaping it. when you where enjoying the Bleep nobody hear you. if say i ask for common Mouth Gig u go ignore. please face it

Nsiehi:
The children are not safe with her.
She was using drugs while pregnant.
She also fractured her baby's hand .
No sane authority will allow any child within her vicinity.

She caused injury to the baby because of the drug influence. Now that she has stopped and a renewed person, I doubt she will cause anymore harm to her children.

i disagree

Divine89 the best thing for you to do is to move on. From all your past, including your kids. Even if you get them back, you will always be a stranger to them

Maybe you should try to focus on your life, go back to school, domt try to have children, maybe marry a divorcee or widower with children. Look to the future, not the past. Get above dead end jobs