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Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? - Romance (6) - Nairaland

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Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by jurjes(f): 9:26am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.


Run!!!!!!!
What did I say? Runnnn!!!!

That man will eventually crush your self esteem and leave you constantly second guessing yourself as you constantly aim to please all his whims and caprices.

2 Likes

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Manuel91(m): 9:28am On Jun 27, 2020
victorian:
Better free yourself. You guys are not married yet and you are getting all. Worked up over a bf who is overbearing.

Newsflash, there are good guys out there who are easygoing about life and their relationship.

Cut off from him and give yourself Correct breathing space.

He's not the end of the world.

Just free yourself jare.


Victorian has said it all...

He is a Dominant man, let's not use plenty English. A relationship is a give I give thingy, not a yes my Lord I don hear thing cheesy

Relationship are times to learn and observe, not to rush into something you would regret or probably kill you someday. Una go fight and settle, smile and cry.. that's the joy of it all.

Not being bossed/ordered around like Ekaite from Calabar. God would provide the right partner for us all o.

You know what to do now I believe!!

Alwaysachick

5 Likes

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by oshaosha2014(m): 9:29am On Jun 27, 2020
I see a regular SIMP here. Hope you are not leaving anything out of what your madam has told you to do today.
Xisnin:

That's a good one.
Being a control freak isn't a crime but
you can cahnge things by taking sniper or using the lagoon and
encouraging others like you to do same.

You will not only improve the gene pool but your sacrifice will
contribute to creating awareness about the issue.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by jiggyman(m): 9:37am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:



He won't or will? Bleep the hell out ta?


He hasn't raise his hands though, and he apologized the first time he raised his voice. But I don't know how today's own will go because I sent him a chat and called him overbearing., no reply yet.

All men have ego. I sometimes override my gf but there are limit to everything. How can he possibly ask u to go to cv by 4pm?? Who u go meet there ? Sha be happy

3 Likes

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 9:43am On Jun 27, 2020
apatheticme:


I've made my point!

Now run along go smoke your weed.
OH MY GOD!
Hey lil' girl! You got no clue of what you talkin' about! How did you know I'm a weed smoker? You smoke too?...
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by wilcox(m): 9:44am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:



He won't or will? Bleep the hell out ta?


He hasn't raise his hands though, and he apologized the first time he raised his voice. But I don't know how today's own will go because I sent him a chat and called him overbearing., no reply yet.
Perhaps you were too fast to tell him that. Don’t expect an apology from him this time but you rather apologize.
It’s just a matter mutual understanding.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 9:44am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.
Genesis 3:16
To the woman he said, “I will make your pains in childbearing very severe; with painful labor you will give birth to children. Your desire will be for your husband, and he will RULE OVER YOU .” A virtuous woman gives wise counsel
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 9:46am On Jun 27, 2020
Xisnin:

You miss my point.
All overbearing people are "terrible" is patently false.
Some people want and prefer overbearing people.
This may be new to you but regardless of gender, not everyone is in the "normal" range.
There are those who prefer conditions that will make you sick to your stomach.
I guess the fact that many people pretend we are all the same is why some marriages don't last
while others live in misery.

The OP knows the man better than you and what was her reaction?
She wanted to "change" him rather


I never said that it is not bad as it looks as I have no idea how it really looks.
My point is that he is not bad if he found a compatible person who likes to be dominated
and controlled.


Why must anyone "compliment", "praise", "mock", "insult" another?
The question is pointless.
People will do whatever they like if they can.
The question is whether you want to be part of it or not.
That is how the world works not how you want it to be.
He is taming her because she is okay with it(so far).
There is no where in her story where she was forced with a gun pointed to her head.
Check the topic again: "How do you cope", not "Ho to escape" and not "is this right for me?"


This is laughable.
Even a well-brought-up kid wouldn't fall for such cheap schemes unless
they are comfortable with it.

I don't ask for a second opinion if I find someone repugnant because I don't need any.
But the OP can't even decide if the relationship bad is greater than the good which says a lot.
That is why she needs advice.
I am sure she is not his first girlfriend and others might have run when they couldn't cope.

Everything you wrote showed you are a dominating man. And you believe some people want others to dominate them, so you don't mind dominating them. The check is: would you want another person to dominate you? You know the answer. And from your response here, it is clear who you are.

By the way, go and read my response to you again, there was no insult there. What I can see is a dominating man in you who cannot bear another facing them. If I sit you down, I will clear that dominating ego in you with strong words cos dominating people like you talk anyhow. If I shake you, believe me, you will crawl into your shell. I swear. People like you don't have much to offer than to dominate. And that is what is killing Nigeria. You are beginning to irritate me seriously. Guy, you need to change. That someone wants to be dominated should not give you the go ahead to dominate the person. Rather, help the person to get over the abuse the person has passed through.

I pray you get help soon; else, you will go down the Hitler and Stalin route. Obviously you need help to say you from yourself. Goodluck Mr. Females Dominator.

1 Like

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Maobichek: 9:51am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:


If i keep pacifying him and he has no control again, won't it lead to physical or public abuse one day? What If he raises his voice at me in public one day?
. You personally know your relationship with him more than everyone here, pls compare the "pros" and the "cons" and decide on what you want. I'm a man, I'm not overbearing and I abhor it with passion but one thing is certain; in every relationship, you must give up something (sacrifice) in order to make it work, thank you.

1 Like

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by daprofo: 10:00am On Jun 27, 2020
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Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by petitejolie(f): 10:03am On Jun 27, 2020
U can’t take it means u can’t take it. There is nothing manly about being overbearing. We even have women that are overbearing too and Dey do dat to their partner who is easy going and act like mumu. So if u know u can’t be a mumu, ure meant for the sky cos overbearing partners wether man or woman won’t let their spouses fly high. They are very insecured. They should either marry their type or a very quiet and docile person

1 Like

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by daprofo: 10:04am On Jun 27, 2020
.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by sacajawea: 10:05am On Jun 27, 2020
Ramos16:


that tolerate our make stupidity and entitled mentality
What are you Saying?
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by ebukaka12(m): 10:06am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:


Yes
go watch 'Gabriels Inferno' too.
It shows all what ya going through
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by combination123: 10:07am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by combination123: 10:09am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:


If i keep pacifying him and he has no control again, won't it lead to physical or public abuse one day? What If he raises his voice at me in public one day?
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by cihofo: 10:23am On Jun 27, 2020
https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=165570465016869&id=112348863672363

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by airminem(f): 10:31am On Jun 27, 2020
ITS CALLED A CHARACTER OF AN ALPHA MALE not "overbearin" grin Enjoy him and tell him how you would appeciate the relationship more
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by truthhurts2: 10:35am On Jun 27, 2020
Doesn't matter what I think, or @forgness or @combination 123 or @petitejolie for that matter. None of can possibly know how it feels to be in your position and none of us have to live with the consequences of your decision.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 10:39am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:



Even when its obvious he is being in considerate. What happened today? He told me to go change my laptop battery today. He wanted me to leave my house by 4pm to Ikeja. My house to Ikeja is like 2hrs journey. I tried to pacify him that I will go first thing in the morning but he insisted and started bringing up other talks.
That's a narcissist. He won't change. Not until he sees a reason to. Don't waste your time trying to change him. When you marry him, you can trust it will only get worse.

1 Like

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by NoToPile: 10:51am On Jun 27, 2020
How can he expect you to leave your house by 4pm to computer village which is 2hrs from your place and he doesn't see reason with you saying you will go the next day instead.

The way you wrote 'I tried to pacify him' as if its an offence to prefer going at a more convenient time to change your laptop battery. If this one needs pacification what will you do when you offend him, wil you offer a sacrifice?

You are seeing the red flags now at least he's not pretending you better do the needful.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by JoseRaji(m): 10:51am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.
You can't cope. Just end it now. Even if you both talk about it, and he agrees to change, you can't guarantee that he won't reset to default settings after marriage. Think about your long term happiness.

2 Likes

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by BigDick70inch(m): 10:54am On Jun 27, 2020
Shaking my head for you in advance!!

Now u ain't seeing the"DULL RED BUT A VERY BRIGHT RED LIGHT"and u still wana shock your head...

Jux cos..the Lil girl in you keeps telling you dat u can change him hun??




Alwaysachick:



He won't or will? Bleep the hell out ta?


He hasn't raise his hands though, and he apologized the first time he raised his voice. But I don't know how today's own will go because I sent him a chat and called him overbearing., no reply yet.

1 Like

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by KORLAR(m): 10:57am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.

Don’t listen to those telling you to just leave him.
He’s the ‘traditional’ African man who wants total submission.
What you need to do is communicate your feelings with him and let him learn how his actions are affecting your relationship and affection to him.
Let him know anytime he does his controlling thing and let him know how you feel about it and that you can’t continue with the relationship if he doesn’t change.
After constant complaints and his failure to heed, feel free to leave him.

Sure if he loves you, he’d be willing to change and make amends.

Take care.

2 Likes

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by ststyreal(f): 11:06am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.
My dear listen to me if you will... If you want to enjoy your life till God calls you home, run away from a domineering and controlling man because, they will end up frustrating and separating you from what ever you hold dear to you Including your family members of possible.
I know what I am telling you because I am presently married and judging from my close pals experience, cut that guy off with all frankness, tell him you can't cope with his overbearing attitude.
I am being Frank with you here and this is my honest advice to you but, if you go ahead and marry him and thinks he will change later, huhhh, my dear let me burst your bubble, it's going to get worst untill you end up miserable. Now you have the chance, let go of that man...
Nobody should quote me Biko, cos this is my own honest opinion....

2 Likes

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by frubben(m): 11:17am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:


Not really, but he always wants me to do as he says. Even when he wants me to come over and I give a reason why I can't come, he gets pissed like I'm disobedient.
its not is fault. Its konji grin
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Sarah20A(f): 11:25am On Jun 27, 2020
Don't start what you can't finish embarassed
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by EdmundDantes(m): 11:25am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:



Even when its obvious he is being in considerate. What happened today? He told me to go change my laptop battery today. He wanted me to leave my house by 4pm to Ikeja. My house to Ikeja is like 2hrs journey. I tried to pacify him that I will go first thing in the morning but he insisted and started bringing up other talks.

You better exit this relationship. Na craze man I dey see so.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by EdmundDantes(m): 11:28am On Jun 27, 2020
Alwaysachick:


If i keep pacifying him and he has no control again, won't it lead to physical or public abuse one day? What If he raises his voice at me in public one day?

In you mind you already know you have to exit this relationship. No need to bring it here.
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 11:33am On Jun 27, 2020
ethicallyright:

kneel and beg him. Pacify his damn ego if you love him. Submit to him.
Alwaysachick, do not do this!
Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 11:34am On Jun 27, 2020
EdmundDantes:


In you mind you already know you have to exit this relationship. No need to bring it here.
Gaslighting.
Alwaysachick, don't let it get to you.

1 Like

Re: Ladies How Do You Cope With An Overbearing Man??? by Nobody: 11:35am On Jun 27, 2020
ethicallyright:

Don't reply him then. If he doesn't search for you , let him go.
Gbam

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