₦airaland Forum

Bestinstinct:
I really don't like commenting on stuffs like this but your input made me want to chip in this. I had a similar affair with a lady who's having a blissful relationship before she met me. All efforts to make her continue her relationship fell on deaf ears as a she was carried away with Yoruba demon things. We were banging eachother while her main guy sees me as a bestie. When he suspected, she dragged phone with him just like the OP wrote and we stopped chatting via WhatsApp and moved to a completely messaging app. I sometimes pity guys like OP. He should just face reality.

MummyD2020:
Seconded, pls help

Emotionss:
[color=#006600][/color]
The opening is not just a simp, but a Chronic simp.

freesoul12:
I can see that funny op want to reconcile. Mark my word u will regret it if u do. Leave d girl.. We have been in similar situation. People wey love u don advise u say make u leave.. u still wan follow d girl talk. E go soon clear for ur eye.

frozen70:
The heart is always in need of its opposite sex, its meant not to be alone

Am glad you didn't see anything to hold against her over that guy in question

If you think you want to go on with another girl while giving her time to cool off, go ahead, even men are not faithful from the beginning of life

She definitely have other admirers but with time she will lay them off after marriage

If you think you have gotten another woman, wait and see what you will discover in her

Don't rush give yourself time

But learn to trust your woman, if you treat a woman well even without spending a kobo, she will not have any reason to cheat

Don't judge her too quickly
You know what.?

extol1:
stop confusing me, which one is "single one side." come out boldly

uthlaw:
sit her down and talk to her,you are talking like 15years old boy....a cheater will always cheat,allow baba move on!

SexytorresE:
it means u and I single , let's stay one side

extol1:
pm you straight away, so that we can start our parole. who knows we might be together

Serene123:
I have gone as far as secretly getting access to her WhatsApp. I didn't see any single chat with her and the guy nor another person. But the calls just keep pisisng me off.

I realised I shouldn't have gone that far. I should have just be calmed and let her do her wish

Siberry:
Most of the advice here are from insecure men, please shove their advice up where the su doesn't shine.

My husband lives in Nigeria and I live in the UK, and he's always accusing me of one thing or the other. I'm full time job and schooling full time at thw same, and I don't even have time for myself not talk of cheating on him. I get at 5am, read before I start work and I do lectures during the day as well. After work and lectures, at night I catch up recordd lectures and do assessments. I barely even have time to eat, yet this man accuses me of cheating whenever he calls and I don't pick up. Sure his friends just like many men on thos post will swear to him that I'm cheating. Now whenever he accuses of rubbish like that, I give him silent treatment for many days. My head is already full, and I don't want him stressing me out again with some stupid cheating accusations. Mind you that alll these are based on assumptions

The story here is don't allow these men on here ruin your happiness.

From your write up, it looks like you only engaged her because of the money she puts into the relationship. If this case was reversed, you lot would call the girl a gold digger.

Now ask yourself these geniune questions: Do you really love her or the money she brings in? Do you really miss her or the money she brings in? Do you have proof that she is cheating on you? Let your answers help you make the best decision.

SexytorresE:
smile

Serene123:
Please I will need your constructive opinion on this. Been battling with this thoughts for some time now.

I engaged my girl last year. Reason why I did engage her was because I saw her intent to be with me. I have seen her gave out her cash to help get somethings for our new apartment. She has even used her cash to buy some properties she wants in the house when we get married.
She has stood and defended me to her family on why she is getting married to me. She has really earned my trust and never regretted engaging her. She is one girl that every man will like to have as wife

In the course of our relationship months back, I noticed there is this guy that call her. I questioned and she said is just a friend. I have told her I am not comfortable with the call. Yes I have listened to the calls and it doesn't sound serious
On 25th Dec I place a call across to her phone and she wasn't picking. She later told me reason why she didn't pick.
While we were together I noticed she didn't pick cos she went out with the same guy I have been complaining about. I got to know via a pic.
She has insisted nothing serious is going on.
I was so angry and I needed to take her phone and check up something. We struggled with the phone and she injured her nails.. She is saying I am a woman beater and I have anger issue.
She started keeping to herself and phone and was bold to tell me that this action of mine has succeeded in killing the feelings she has for me.

She has asked for time to get her mental health back and for close to two weeks now we haven't been flowing well..

I have tried to talk to her so we fix this shit but she said she needs time.

I have decided to give her the time she needs while I focus on something else. Yes, I miss her

I won't lie, is emotional for me and someone is currently trying to fill her vacuum by being all nice. I am getting closer to her, but my heart still yearn for my fiance.

I don't know if I am doing the right thing by being close to another lady. I don't know if I should belivee her that she has lost feelings for me and move on.
I need your advise.

Sorry for the lengthy thread

Serene123:
Please I will need your constructive opinion on this. Been battling with this thoughts for some time now.

I engaged my girl last year. Reason why I did engage her was because I saw her intent to be with me. I have seen her gave out her cash to help get somethings for our new apartment. She has even used her cash to buy some properties she wants in the house when we get married.
She has stood and defended me to her family on why she is getting married to me. She has really earned my trust and never regretted engaging her. She is one girl that every man will like to have as wife

In the course of our relationship months back, I noticed there is this guy that call her. I questioned and she said is just a friend. I have told her I am not comfortable with the call. Yes I have listened to the calls and it doesn't sound serious
On 25th Dec I place a call across to her phone and she wasn't picking. She later told me reason why she didn't pick.
While we were together I noticed she didn't pick cos she went out with the same guy I have been complaining about. I got to know via a pic.
She has insisted nothing serious is going on.
I was so angry and I needed to take her phone and check up something. We struggled with the phone and she injured her nails.. She is saying I am a woman beater and I have anger issue.
She started keeping to herself and phone and was bold to tell me that this action of mine has succeeded in killing the feelings she has for me.

She has asked for time to get her mental health back and for close to two weeks now we haven't been flowing well..

I have tried to talk to her so we fix this shit but she said she needs time.

I have decided to give her the time she needs while I focus on something else. Yes, I miss her

I won't lie, is emotional for me and someone is currently trying to fill her vacuum by being all nice. I am getting closer to her, but my heart still yearn for my fiance.

I don't know if I am doing the right thing by being close to another lady. I don't know if I should belivee her that she has lost feelings for me and move on.
I need your advise.

Sorry for the lengthy thread

greatstephenho:
my brother you can only pretend to be calm if you don't love her. I understand how you feel and don't blame yourself for your reaction it will unvail the evil that would have befallen you after marriage. Stay put to the time she wants you to give her if she is for you she will definitely come back.

Forget this people saying she is being bleeped by the new guy, nothing might be going on and something might be going on but don't think about that it will only weigh you down.

Siberry:
Most of the advice here are from insecure men, please shove their advice up where the su doesn't shine.

My husband lives in Nigeria and I live in the UK, and he's always accusing me of one thing or the other. I'm full time job and schooling full time at thw same, and I don't even have time for myself not talk of cheating on him. I get at 5am, read before I start work and I do lectures during the day as well. After work and lectures, at night I catch up recordd lectures and do assessments. I barely even have time to eat, yet this man accuses me of cheating whenever he calls and I don't pick up. Sure his friends just like many men on thos post will swear to him that I'm cheating. Now whenever he accuses of rubbish like that, I give him silent treatment for many days. My head is already full, and I don't want him stressing me out again with some stupid cheating accusations. Mind you that alll these are based on assumptions

The story here is don't allow these men on here ruin your happiness.

From your write up, it looks like you only engaged her because of the money she puts into the relationship. If this case was reversed, you lot would call the girl a gold digger.

Now ask yourself these geniune questions: Do you really love her or the money she brings in? Do you really miss her or the money she brings in? Do you have proof that she is cheating on you? Let your answers help you make the best decision.

DICKstractor:


If at the end, you allow love to cloud the clear evidence starring at you, I'll advice you take her for pregnancy test before walking her down the aisle.


We don't want another DNA saga in the next 20years.

But, I might be wrong. Nothing might be going on between them. You just have to investigate in secret.

And also, fear guys they call "just a friend or bestie",. They are very dangerous and relationship dickstroyers

frozen70:
The heart is always in need of its opposite sex, its meant not to be alone

Am glad you didn't see anything to hold against her over that guy in question

If you think you want to go on with another girl while giving her time to cool off, go ahead, even men are not faithful from the beginning of life

She definitely have other admirers but with time she will lay them off after marriage

If you think you have gotten another woman, wait and see what you will discover in her

Don't rush give yourself time

But learn to trust your woman, if you treat a woman well even without spending a kobo, she will not have any reason to cheat

Don't judge her too quickly
You know what.?

extol1:
speaking from a woman perspective. all of us are biased

Serene123:
Money she brings in?.

You misunderstood it Ma. I just stated her readiness to build a home with me by getting somethings. Not that she brings in a lot of money to confuse me. I am the one bringing in the money.

I haven't really gotten an evidence despite the chats , just the calls.
Yes I love her.

Just like u said, I now understand people handles things differently.
I will give her the time she wants, when she come back then we will renegotiate.
Thbaks for your opinions

Serene123:
What?.

Go on, I am learning

milky3:
why are guys here so bittered and mean? some of u can't be a good judge.... @Op you actually know what u want without anybody's opinion. give her time (maximum a month) and if she doesn't see a need to come back for u definitely she's no longer interested.

desmond827:
bro i really wanna advice u ..u see all what happen to u happen to me also
bro i wont lye for u there is something going wrong
i also scanned my girl what app on my phone and i see all the chat infact the guy hv sex him once but ..immediately i noticed
i locked my heart and i showed her all what she did ....she was shocked ..i laught..i told despite your promises so you cheated ..well its fine
.
but i told her have it at the back of your mind that we cant married if you u will accept no problem
she accepted and and i forgive her and we are having fun and i hv v careful of myself not to turn to pregnant?
..lock your hearth and keep silent ..dating a cheating partner is like throwing your happiness and digging grave for your self
..shes deleting message as my girl too do ..onces shes online i login straight on what app web and shes deleting immediately
bro dont fall for her again ..leave her for the new guy ..dont disturb her and always take 2 bottle of trophy everyday life goes on

adexpa:
You are the most kid here. Every advice you guys give is all about someone to leave, you guys don't know that leaving is not always a solution to every problems. You are asking him to leave as if you have one saint sister to give him, which one of these girls is saint. See, immediately you agree to the terms "marriage" you need to format all the idea of perfect/saint woman........no human is saint, we just need someone that can be contained and corrected.
It's not bad if she is ready to adjust

slumcat:
You too mumu.

extol1:
baba, no vex. beauty they say is in the eye of the beholder. na her type I like

extol1:
what I means is that a time will in the marriage when love will siege as a result of disagreement or the shape of the woman during pregnancy that the man couldn't withstand. it will take value and respect not to misbehave outside by cheating on your spouse

Serene123:
Thank you