₦airaland Forum

missyblissy:
How do you know am not married?

To each its own. Sometimes women tends to hold sex when they are not satisfied. You don't come and hump and go like. She's a horse without feelings. Treat her like the Queen she is and You will see her eat you in bed......

spiritedtete:
I read your assertion... you can't be more correct in this... you are absolutely right...

I have asked questions about who made the rule of one man one woman... they said GOD.. they sad bible lol... also did bible condemn polygamy in any way... we have examples of great men in the bible who are polygamous.. I tell my wife with all due respect.. if i chose to marry morethan one.. no one can question me.. and i am not giving anyone a divorce.

My major contribution as the husband is to make sure everybody in my home feel protected and grows in there various life endeavors.

But as a man... you need to understand human purposes... before even trying to walk with any even being as a friend.

Olunmercy56:
My dear, I'll go for romantic! Money will follow Most rich women are having sex with small boy or their domestic staffs. I don't want much riches, inasmuch we have a house and two cars of our own with some business, I'm okay

CalliDora1:

Na food?

On a more serious note though, I think what usually causes it is, the woman is most times overwhelmed with the wifely duties at the homefront. in the process she's expended therefore sex will be the last thing on her mind as the passion for it will have died from exaustion from doing chores. If you observed, it usually happens after the kids have started coming and the workload has increased.

If the man can make arrangements for a house help ( not necessarily a live-in help) to assist with the chores, the woman will be more relaxed to reason sex as it's only a relaxed mind that can get a woman in the mood .

Hassanmaye:
Lol how do you know that

bizme:
You have made very important points. Personally I think getting house helps is a vital aspect of the domestic life. Some of us don't mind spending time doing chores around the house and in the kitchen... (I prepare more delicious dishes than my dearest :-) ) However, there reality is that oftentimes the man's (woman's too) time is likely much more valuable outside the house... This is why I don't get it when some men that I have met don't like the idea of taking house helps citing their own mothers as an example of why a wife should do fine without help. Well, many of those mothers were very sad creatures and would have preferred more humane treatment.

I think what I have noticed is that after marriage the man and the woman stop dating each other. They took things for granted, no special outings...just church services together. I also think that sex is deeply mental, and that it is these dating/chasing rituals that develop the sexual tension and excitement in each other. Take it away and it turns a routine. I don't accept polygamy as a solution: many who keep preaching it as a demonstration of their manliness don't even practise it. The last time I checked polygamy is still well practiced in Nigeria and no one stops anyone from going that direction in the first place: that is, the so-called Western indoctrination doesn't force anyone not to. It is however interesting how these pro-polygamy men get furious whenever a man messes up their own daughters.

RisenPhoenix1:
Women use sex to buy love. Men use love to buy sex. Like any economic transaction each party is looking to find a bargain, i.e. spend the minimum amount of their currency to purchase the maximum amount of the service they need. So once women have gotten the man's commitment, they will thereafter spend as little sex as is necessary to keep him from straying to another market. Whereas, once a man has acquired the woman's sexual favours, he will spend the minimum amount of love and commitment to keep her from withholding them. The best solution is to marry more than one wife. Thereafter, they can share the sexual burden among themselves, and the man can pretend to love all of them equally and share a little of his attention among each of them; satisfying all parties involved.

Factoid of life. Free of charge for you.

Olunmercy56:
My dear, I'll go for romantic! Money will follow Most rich women are having sex with small boy or their domestic staffs. I don't want much riches, inasmuch we have a house and two cars of our own with some business, I'm okay

ArcFresky:
Personally, this is my worst fear...I detest cheaters. I need to marry a nymph.

DMerciful:
Funny enough my desire increases after a stressful day as sex reduces stress absolutely for me and I sleep better afterwards

CalliDora1:
A house gird can do all that because that is basically her job. Does she go for any other outdoor jobs like the wife? No.



You think so?
A man once posted here on nairaland how his wife travelled for only 8days and he was left to take up her role while she was away. Within three days, he was already feeling the heat and complaining bitterly. a He then admitted the wife was a super woman and appreciated her so much in that post. So you asking which chores, try switching roles with your woman one day and see if you can cope for two days.

RisenPhoenix1:
Women use sex to buy love. Men use love to buy sex. Like any economic transaction each party is looking to find a bargain, i.e. spend the minimum amount of their currency to purchase the maximum amount of the service they need. So once women have gotten the man's commitment, they will thereafter spend as little sex as is necessary to keep him from straying to another market. Whereas, once a man has acquired the woman's sexual favours, he will spend the minimum amount of love and commitment to keep her from withholding them. The best solution is to marry more than one wife. Thereafter, they can share the sexual burden among themselves, and the man can pretend to love all of them equally and share a little of his attention among each of them; satisfying all parties involved.

Factoid of life. Free of charge for you.

Olunmercy56:
Some married women said most of their husbands are not romantic enough, some husbands concentrate more on work than their family. Etc

Olunmercy56:
Some married women said most of their husbands are not romantic enough, some husbands concentrate more on work than their family. Etc

CalliDora1:

Na food?

On a more serious note though, I think what usually causes it is, the woman is most times overwhelmed with the wifely duties at the homefront. in the process she's expended therefore sex will be the last thing on her mind as the passion for it will have died from exaustion from doing chores. If you observed, it usually happens after the kids have started coming and the workload has increased.

If the man can make arrangements for a house help ( not necessarily a live-in help) to assist with the chores, the woman will be more relaxed to reason sex as it's only a relaxed mind that can get a woman in the mood .

Hassanmaye:
20years!!! Chai man you dont know what God has done for you, my uncle divorce his wife 2weeks after marriage! What is happening with marriage this times

RisenPhoenix1:
Women use sex to buy love. Men use love to buy sex. Like any economic transaction each party is looking to find a bargain, i.e. spend the minimum amount of their currency to purchase the maximum amount of the service they need. So once women have gotten the man's commitment, they will thereafter spend as little sex as is necessary to keep him from straying to another market. Whereas, once a man has acquired the woman's sexual favours, he will spend the minimum amount of love and commitment to keep her from withholding them. The best solution is to marry more than one wife. Thereafter, they can share the sexual burden among themselves, and the man can pretend to love all of them equally and share a little of his attention among each of them; satisfying all parties involved.

Factoid of life. Free of charge for you.

Tapout:
You are comparing two different ERAs. if not for the ever evolving world we inhabit, then yes I think we can even do better than them.

RisenPhoenix1:
That is only because you have been exposed to a barrage of misinformation from all sides; Hollywood, Nollywood, relationship advice, etc. If you had voiced out your doubts about polygamy to your grandfather, he would have probably laughed out loud in your face and told you stories about the advantages. That is when men were men and knew that they were all cut out for polygamy (or they were considered effeminate).

Communicate away bro, communicate away. You asked for solutions and I told you what works. But you are free to try out what you like for as long as you want to. Just remember the only working solution; for when you have to get back to it at last.

RisenPhoenix1:
Women use sex to buy love. Men use love to buy sex. Like any economic transaction each party is looking to find a bargain, i.e. spend the minimum amount of their currency to purchase the maximum amount of the service they need. So once women have gotten the man's commitment, they will thereafter spend as little sex as is necessary to keep him from straying to another market. Whereas, once a man has acquired the woman's sexual favours, he will spend the minimum amount of love and commitment to keep her from withholding them. The best solution is to marry more than one wife. Thereafter, they can share the sexual burden among themselves, and the man can pretend to love all of them equally and share a little of his attention among each of them; satisfying all parties involved.

Factoid of life. Free of charge for you.

luminouz:
Your no.7 point just destroyed all the others.

If she is so uninterested in sex in the first 6 points, how in hell did she get so sex starved that a stranger would now take advantage? Or sex starvation means something else?

What you don't know is this, the women who truly experience what you say are very few in numbers and have stayed longer in marriage,say for 15-30 years. How do you explain a marriage of 2 years having such issues if the wife is not cheating? So your number 7 is the anchor and disruptor of your whole write-up.

Kriss216:
You know the ‘handwriting’ of your nightmare. Lol

luminouz:
Surely you can't be blind to what he posted, can you?

He has TWO HOUSEHELPS!!!! and he is still getting fuqed up by his wife!! So what dafuq is your point? Or is he not treating her like a Queen enough? Wait... I thought in marriage,two bodies become one and he has access to her body and conjugal rights anytime he wants it or are you not married to NOT KNOW THAT?

Let her hold the sex na...her eyes go clear when he goes outside to get it.

bizme:
You have made very important points. Personally I think getting house helps is a vital aspect of the domestic life. Some of us don't mind spending time doing chores around the house and in the kitchen... (I prepare more delicious dishes than my dearest :-) ) However, there reality is that oftentimes the man's (woman's too) time is likely much more valuable outside the house... This is why I don't get it when some men that I have met don't like the idea of taking house helps citing their own mothers as an example of why a wife should do fine without help. Well, many of those mothers were very sad creatures and would have preferred more humane treatment.

I think what I have noticed is that after marriage the man and the woman stop dating each other. They took things for granted, no special outings...just church services together. I also think that sex is deeply mental, and that it is these dating/chasing rituals that develop the sexual tension and excitement in each other. Take it away and it turns a routine. I don't accept polygamy as a solution: many who keep preaching it as a demonstration of their manliness don't even practise it. The last time I checked polygamy is still well practiced in Nigeria and no one stops anyone from going that direction in the first place: that is, the so-called Western indoctrination doesn't force anyone not to. It is however interesting how these pro-polygamy men get furious whenever a man messes up their own daughters.

RisenPhoenix1:
Women use sex to buy love. Men use love to buy sex. Like any economic transaction each party is looking to find a bargain, i.e. spend the minimum amount of their currency to purchase the maximum amount of the service they need. So once women have gotten the man's commitment, they will thereafter spend as little sex as is necessary to keep him from straying to another market. Whereas, once a man has acquired the woman's sexual favours, he will spend the minimum amount of love and commitment to keep her from withholding them. The best solution is to marry more than one wife. Thereafter, they can share the sexual burden among themselves, and the man can pretend to love all of them equally and share a little of his attention among each of them; satisfying all parties involved.

Factoid of life. Free of charge for you.

tarantino1:
Lol

And I thought my Uncle's three months marriage was a national record

Drizzle007:
Can we be friends, I feel like I have alot to learn from you.

cerebralniggie1:
Too much wisdom kee you dere.
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You didn't factor the wahala that comes with polygamy. The problems from one wife alone can be overwhelming how much more from multiple wives?

RisenPhoenix1:
With polygamy, there would be rivalry. Each woman would double up on her efforts to keep more of their mutual husband's attention. There will also always be a nagging feeling that another wife is getting more sex than her, and this will trigger the wife to try to get even more from the husband (keeping a greater share of the market so to speak). Finally, a woman always finds a man infinitely more attractive when he is not readily available to her beck and call; and it also triggers their possessiveness when other available females find him attractive. All these complexities will work in his favour.

A woman in a female herd does not think the same way as a woman with exclusive attention to a man. Polygamy is a woman leveller and destroys all their transactional techniques; that is why women hate it. It is like the difference between a customer's options in a monopoly and in a free market; the man being the customer in this case.