₦airaland Forum

I am not a doctor but I have heard that having apollo could be an indication of other things that may be wrong with you. You may have a bacterial infection or something else that caused the apollo. You would then have to treat the underlying problem the effects of which will cure the apollo.
If you can afford it, I suggest you go see a medical doctor.

High_Chief:
You should have known that the idea of putting up this thread will cos another cyber tribal war and its very childish and not called for

Inked there is nothing to discuss on this topic, the OP is aiming at something else

Good question **Babe i think this is the second time am telling you this**

Are you worried about a tribal war or the ascertainment of the truth? May the truth prevail. Why are all these Ibos getting defensive, sef? Geez? Take a chill pill, mehn!

Nigerians and their defensive mentality! This is a simple question: are Ibos jealous of the success of Lagos? You would think intelligent people will give a simple answer and say yes or no.

Another simple question: should Yorubas stop speaking Yoruba in Lagos? You would think intelligent people will a simple answer. But no, these backward-thinking of Nairaland have claimed it is a tribal war. Get a life.

I did not generalize Ibos because of one woman. I asked a question about how Ibos think based on the woman said and what other Ibos I know have said.

I guess the truth is bitter, but it must be said.

High_Chief:
You dont have to disrespect me and I asked you a question, how old are you?

Ahh! You disrespected me first by calling me a fool. Respect is reciprocal. My age is none of your business. Keep to the issues. No ad hominem statements.

High_Chief:
@OP you are just a fool that does not know that Lagos was once the Capital of Nigeria. How old are you?

you are the bigger fool. May thunder strike you and kill you. shut the phuck up if you have nothing of substance to say. What does being the former capital have to do with saying Yorubas should not speak Yoruba in Lagos?

Shame on every Naija person wey no sabi speak Pidgin, especially the ones wey grow up for Naija. Colo mentality don scatter their head.

My brother just talked with this Ibo lady who recently returned from visiting Lagos. She (the Ibo lady) said her visit to Lagos annoyed her because too many people were saying "nigbati nigbati," apparently taking a jab at the prevalence of Yoruba culture and language in Lagos. She further said that "nigbati  nigbati" should not be used and that only English should be spoken because Lagos was the commercial capital and an international and diverse city, and that Yorubas should not take credit for success of Lagos. Put simply, she said Yoruba people should not speak Yoruba language in Lagos. That is an insult, to put it mildly.

I responded by telling her that if hearing "nigbati nigbati" offended her, that she should do herself a favor by staying away from Lagos and visiting only Igbo land when she visits Nigeria. Her gestures and words also exuded undertones of jealousy.

My people of Nairaland, do you think Ibos are jealous because the success of Lagos is a Yoruba land whose success has been attributed to Yoruba people, especially in light of the improvements in Lagos under the administration of Gov. Babatunde Raji Fashola?

some ladies love pet names like "Macaroni"

but I love to call my girls "juicy" because I like "juicy" girls. Uhmnnnnn!

Gennevieve,

Will you marry me? (I am on kneeling down on one knee). Please say yes.

FYI: I know this pic is photoshopped and not you, but nevertheless I still dream about you.

gist4real:
its annoying when u read posts like this ,  "Long queue here man,  All for a thousand bucks,  Smh#",  "Sometimes I do things so my 50 year old self won't have to. #TeamNoRegrets",  "am more connected than telecom n more respected like d Jagaban" ,  "Am on my 12th Cup of Hennesy and 6th bottle of Alomo",

Who cares?

Not to mention the fact that people keep [b]messing up their very good african names [/b]Bidemi  becomes; Acceber BoSsladybeebie. Tunbosun is now; Wazza Fimilejo.
brb

Gbadebo becomes gbabesky

Shakiratu becomes Shaniqua   

Onyekachi becomes Onyi

Tunde becomes Tuns

Yewande becomes Yewy

Adewale becomes Wallon


When all these names are used on your fb page, the essence of social networking is diluted, as in many cannot search and find you by the name with which they have associated you; therefore they cannot network with you.

Busy_body:
Bawss


What is good about his mundane post? Does everything have to be a war between the 2 sexes? All everyone here is saying is if you are gonna follow the oyinbo tradition of having a white wedding, they might as well toe the line of the same tradition and put the ladies name first then.

Na wetin be the biggie about whose name should take precedence, dem dey take am collect money from the bank or what, mscheewww, these men sef, and small time dem go dey talk say women are petty, taking offence solely cos women are saying let tradition win the day, na wa oh, Nigerian women don suffer sha.


@BB20

Trying to be sleek ehn and pretending you are giving advise abi, advise wey you no remember say you wan give before abi, shior, I know your game, you are still hanging around on this thread because of those groomsmen abi, you are getting none, barawo, potential husband snatcher oshi, lol.

I am not disagreeing with you. My point is that if that same Oyinbo tradition had a practice of putting a man's name first, these women will say you should not follow it. But in Prince Wiliiam and Kate's wedding, Prince William's name came first before Kate's. So I don't even know which Oyinbo tradition you are talking about?

As usual, a substantial majority of women will advocate in favor of following a long-standing practice when it suits or benefits them. Many women here are saying that the woman's name should come first because of its long-standing practice, not because of any other logical reason.

However, when these same women are confronted with another scenario in which men advocate for the continuance of a behavior because of its long-standing practice, these same women will revolt and say that such practice should change if such practice does not benefit them. This is feminist mentality to say the least, always cherry-picking when you want to be treated like a lady--obviously when it benefits women.

I don't think I have personally noticed a pattern of whose name comes first on the invitation, probably because I am not cognizant of such things, but I think whatever the long-standing practice is should control here. Presumably, it had been done that way for good reasons, not for malicious or invidiously discriminatory reasons.

zstranger:
Thanks Ben Akabueze, smart Ibo man showing lazy, clueless yorubas the way forward.

Igbo Kwenu

If Ibos are that smart why don't they go and fix their own state rather than leech on Lagos, which is owned by Yoruba people and governed by a smart Yoruba man.

The first thing for Ibos to do is to find an intelligent Ibo man to run your state, not a "business" man to do so. Because we all know that rather than calling a putative business man who, for example, sells fake goods or pirated CDS a con man, most Ibos would call him a smart business man. I am just saying. It is called okrika mentality.

Good ish! It is always good to see Nigerians repping us hard in the diaspora.

isale_gan2:
This is not necessary.  All women are not faithless.  Enough of this disrespect to the man and his family, please.

I don't know why seemingly normal people even bother to bring their problems to a place like this.  

why is it not necessary? I said she may need some service while he is gone, so I am just advising the brother to err on the side of keeping his wife closer, just in case. You never know these days. Like the elders say, body no be firewood.

poster,

Keep your wife close to you, bro! There are too many predators out there who may help keep your wife's vah jay jay warm for the time you will be gone, especially since this will be a new marriage, as she may need someone to beat up that vah jay jay regularly. Good luck with your marriage, bro!

Guys and Galz,

Please let's be courteous to one another and quit the disrespect to one other's culture, especially the negative and insensitive remarks about the ancestors of African Americans. Likewise, let's quit making stereotypical and insulting statements about Nigerians. It is not fair, particularly in light of this being a predominantly Nigerian forum.

We have more than enough to deal with already as you guys know--many ladies don't want to change their last name upon marriage.

I did not intend for this thread to lead to an all out war between the sexes. Apparently the fact that this topic evokes so much passion across the board indicates that it is an issue that many couples have to grapple with. As I type my friend and his fiance have called off their wedding because of this name issue. I would have done the same thing if I were in his shoes. Surprisingly, I did not even know that our Yankified Naija women have now grown more wings than their American counterparts, for this issue to even arise between two young, Naija couples who want to tie the knot. Both families have gotten involved and have advised the girl to compromise, but she is acting like someone on this thread (I won't mention names). I hope they resolve it and go ahed and get married. My two cents

adamsrib:
You want to go there? Okay let's do that! You really think that you are free? Puhleez, NEPA holds your arse hostage EVERY SINGLE DAY! You think you don't have a identity crisis? Then how come Nigeria worships any and everything WESTERN? From clothes to cars almost everything is imported from the west!  IF USA is so bad how come YOUR brothers and sisters will beg borrow and steal just to get a toe into US? You are a liar and there is no truth in you! US doesn't have one of the highest paid governments in the world and still doesn't provide BASIC services for its people. US is not laughed at around the world for talking about how much money it has in oil reserves yet can't provide steady power to its people.  US is not considered the number one scamming nation, Nigeria is! Or how about when I applied for my Nigerian visa I got a letter in the mail that pretty much asked if I was sure I wanted to visit. Folks at YOUR consulate don't encourage people to visit.  I won't even talk about your pathetic court system and your institutional corrupt  police force.

Yes my family were slaves. So what? How many of your brothers and sisters sell their bodies and souls VOLUNTARILY just to get papers to stay in my home country? You can look down on USA all you want but when men are sending their pregnant wives to USA in droves to give birth so their children have a opportunity for a better life  we must be doing something right!

I tell you what, when you get steady power and can talk to me on the internet without using a generator then MAYBE we can talk again, but until then, you can take that pseudo bravado and shove it up your "free" arse!

*Adamsrib is sorry if this post offends other Nigerians. I got nothing but love for most of you.*

If you are all that why don't you take your behind to a forum that represents your country and leave us alone? Real talk. No one will shed a tear if you leave.

It is a man's world; we just need women to support men in their world. Why is that so hard to grasp?

You cannot fight nature. We have the screwdriver and you guys have the receptacle. God made it that way. If you have a problem with it, go and talk to God.

As it is a man's world, that is why most women who marry change their names to their husband's names. While some women may choose to do otherwise, those women are in the minority and are the exception to the rule.

omo_to_dun:
For those saying that Muslim women can keep their last names, would you dare marry a Muslim man knowing that he can marry three more? In a Muslim marriage it is certainly the case that the wife is completely subservient to the husband, or are you ladies just cherry picking the good parts? Of course Muslim marriages last more than Christian marriages since the women are not equal to their husbands and hence cannot initiate divorce proceedings. It is a shame that any modern woman would refer to any part of a Muslim union as exemplary given their track records of marrying out young girls and their general treatment of women.

Atutupoyoyo: Obamaniqua, girl, Werin dey happen?

Obamaniqua: Nothing jare, I just dey shine my eyes make I see if any bobo with money go come my way.

Atutupoyoyo: You and money sha. Anyway, how is your sister, Anaconda?

Obamaniqua: Anaconda is fine o. Matter of fact she just got married to Mallam 12InchBlockos.

Atutupoyoyo: Chineke, doesn't he have like 3 wives and isn't your sister just 12 years old?

Obamaniqua: Abeg, leave story. Just look at the bright side.

Atutupoyoyo: And what is that?

Obamaniqua: She gets to keep her surname!

omo_to_dun

you are one funny son of a gun. lmao

1 Peter 3:1-5, 7
In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands, even those who refuse to accept the Good News. Your godly lives will speak to them better than any words. They will be won over by watching your pure, godly behavior.

I am by no means supporting a dictatorial marriage in which one man thinks he is the God of the house, but it does show that he has been given authority and should take authority and take charge of the house.

Trust me, you will not even be attracted to a man who does not man up and take authority, as in a yes man. Even though you may publicly claim otherwise, deep down in your heart you want a man who can take charge.

the authority of their husbands that the Bible has commanded women to accept is inherent in a woman taking her husband's name, especially if the man demands for that. If the man says he does not want it, then it is a different story. My point is that God has made the man the head of the house, the leader of the family, and having one family name symbolizes that.

But as a humans, we have a choice to do as we please, such as women keeping their own name, but just be ready to deal with the consequences. that is all.

Chiogo


Eph. 5:23-32
For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church; he gave his life to be her Savior. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives must submit to your husbands in everything.

From a Christian perspective, it says submit to your husbands in everything. Get it? God has ordained it, nature has ordained it, so acting contrary to God and nature will cause a death knell to the institution of marriage.

It is very possible that those men who do not care about their wives bearing their name are punks, scrubs, and spineless dudes. Women, you do not have a man's brain nor were you born a man so you will NEVER know how a real man thinks.

I give all you women a homework for today: go and ask your fathers and mothers, your uncles and aunties, your brothers and sisters about your intentions and see what they tell you. Come back and deliver the message.

anfanio:
What's in a name? I can't believe at this age men still put importance on their names.

I guess if your name has no value, then there is nothing to it. For people who value their name and ancestry and culture, then they know the value of a name.  When men have prayed for sons to carry down their name, and when people pay to be identified with a name, you are here saying what is in a name.

Sorry if you do not know the value of your own name, assuming you are a man, but recognize that there a real man out there who know the value as well as the importance of their name.

chiogo:
And how about non-Christians? Or people in whose culture the woman keeps her name? They're not unified?
I'm taking what you wrote literally now: so what if the woman already moved out of her parents' house before getting married?

Still boils down to choice and you cannot force down your opinion on others with all these excuses/justifications. Not like women have not been hyphenating their names anyway so it's not a new concept.

I guess your comment means that you agree that it applies to Christians. For non Christians, marriage is still about unification, and spirituality applies to everyone regardless of whether they are Christians or not--i.e., having one name is a symbolic act of unification.

I never said that the women who keep their name are not unified with their husbands, but that symbolic act is absent. Like I said, it boils down to choice and it can only be possible if the husband consents to it. So at the end of the day, the woman has to persuade her husband to consent to it or find a man who will consent to it. And assuming she finds no one who will consent to it, then that women should be prepared to stay single.

Mz Dark Skin

If you agree with your husband that you will keep your name, then that is good for you. But my point is that you are ignoring that certain things motivate men to want to wife someone, one of which is being the head of the family. What a way to be the head of the family if your wife does not even have your own name! Next thing some of these women will start "fighting" for is for the children to have the mother's name. Next thing will be for the man to change his own name to his wife's name. I am just saying.

Many people are looking at the literal implication of this issue while ignoring the spiritual implication. Having one family name upon marriage is a spiritual sign of unification in front of God and man, and a symbolic and spiritual act of the completion of the woman leaving her father's household and joining her husband, culminating in one new family.

If the woman will not change her surname, why even ask her to be your wife? Just ask her to be your boo or sidepiece so she can keep her name? Why even get married? And if you decide to marry why do a wedding? Just treat her like a side piece and let her keep her name. That way it will be Mr A and Mrs B, not Mr and Mrs A. Let the division start, because such woman is not looking for marriage as a unification, and a missing part of the man's rib.

Omo to dun,

Wetin be the name ooooo