₦airaland Forum

Owliver:
why you ask such question?

EfemenaXY:
I don't mean to be rude, but where did she get such a bush man from?

No need for long story. She should have returned it for the sake of peace, but, he should have taken up the household washing himself - by hand.

Sadist.

babyosisi:
Be more specific dear, an example will help
Things that will cause you or the family harm are a no brainer

Herzumpther:
Thanks jawe. I'm sure winning this.

Good morning.

veave:
Nne kee ije? Ina enwudekwa fa?

Qualer:
Ô na ato gi, ina achi in chinese!

urchbarbie:
Chai. Nne. Been secretly waiting n hoping to hear d best of news from d sunday ish. Herz! Its high time u let lekan go. As Babyosisi said once, dere is no 1 particular man for u. Just hapu d tots of lekan, am sure someday uld look back n smile

veave:
Nwokem iji kwa di moni?





Oburo ogologo akuko ka eji ete ofe okporoko

gazilion:
@Prissyluv,
I perceive that when you were about the age of the little girl you saw in your dream, someone may have taken you or your name to a place (which looked like a church but actually a satanic altar or shrine). That altar or shrine is still active and need be destroyed. I don't believe the girl is the problem, the altar/shrine is. It needs be uprooted or set on fire by prayer.

These Four prayer points will do justice to it if you pray fervently:
1. Every active altar, operating against my life be destroyed completely in the name of Jesus.
2. Every connection of my life to this shrine/altar, be destroyed in the name of Jesus.
3. Agents of darkness ministering at this altar/shrine, go into permanent detention in Jesus name.
4. I loose myself from evil dedications and rededicate myself to God the father, God the Son and God the HolyGhost.

Remember, to share your testimony.

Gazilion.

ichidodo:
[color=#1980BC] [b] We know you're in love..you got butterflies around your eyes where it concerns lakes....but you must understand that we all must be very practical to matters such as these instead of being carried away.We must have a third party to look out for us inspite of ourselves. And that includes tribal,religious,domestic and financial matters. Example you was to put your daughter on a flight somewhere..say i don't know....Brazil? and it was common knowledge a particular airliner had experienced a spate of aircrashes recently...would you feel safe taking that risks with your daughter,even though your daughter likes the interior decor or attendants of the commercial airliner?....i don't think so....So you must look into yourself and the possibility that things may not work as planned,play it in your mind so you don't get crushed if dad says no...he loves you..wants the best for you...And we believe he will be crushed if his fears are confirmed.You can have so many loves from all tribes if you set your mind at it....but you can't repair the crushed spirit of a broken father.[/b] [/color]

Herzumpther:
Do you think he should just wait a bit? Maybe when he returns from his trip in April as hr intends traveling next week? Do you think my dad will be disappointed in me if he should come? I mean on Sunday? Do you think I should talk to dad again? The thing is I'm scared, maybe I should wait a bit.

bukatyne:
Amen dear

Hold on...

When you remember that marriage is ideally for a lifetime, a wait of 1 - 2yrs becomes 'short'

ichidodo:
[color=#1980BC] [b] Sorry if we don't buy into your idea of generalizations because first off we can confidently generalize that 21 century marriages are rife with instances of infidelity especially in Nigeria and on the part of men...Now factor in an intertribal marriage where communication disconnect is certain and the wife can get easily isolated by the simple method of switching languages in a family gathering of some sort then you have the episodes of benin women being naturally fiesty as the general defence mechanism against their randy men.Afterwhich you consider the motives of these men involved in intertribal marriages,are they looking for free licence to roam without the inquisitive glare of a benin wife??. Add these all to the general psyche of a lonely igbo woman with kids or pregnant far away from her comfort zone. This story looks familiar..Oh yes...shiningmama and mutter's...As for general socializing by both families,why do we have to travel 800 miles just to socialize with them or vice versa why can't we just 'branch' by the roadside to see our inlaws abi na only our daughter dey marry for nija??[/b] [/color]

moca:
I can understand why some parents r skeptical of their wards especially females marrying from diff tribes.
Fear of the unknown.

Even in d same tribe,some parents don't want their children to go too far.
Still fear of the unknown.

Parents know their children's weak and strong points.
I've seen parents who agreed that the first daughter can even marry a man from another country but opposed the second stepping far from their town.
Reason;she can't defend herself if the inevitable happens so we need to have her close by.

So to all those who hv problems with parental approvals,have u shown u r a master of ur own mind when crises brew up?
R u too soft/pliable to a fault?
Do u have a mind of ur own?

Can u stand and fight a crowd alone?

These r some of their fears.
And they r genuine.

So it's left to u to convince them that u r on top of d situation however it may seem

Parents have seen that marriage is not a bed of roses as we youngies always hype so they view all angles b4 making their decision.

And they have seen it all.
So when talking to ur parents about issues like this,convince them u can handle it so their mind may know peace.
Most times,they r not really interested in "daddy I love him so much stuff"
Marriage is more than that.

(this was deducted from eavesdropping on my aunt and d husband arguing about d daughter's interest in a man from a different state. Have to tell my cous who went to d dad to reassure him she is no weakling and can take very good care of herself if things go south. Today,that man is one of our best inlaws)

bukatyne:
Don't let go till the very end

My fellowship president waited about 5yrs before the parents agreed he married his wife.

The lady even had a terrible accident which which they claimed was a sign yet it did not deter him.

They are happily married today.

Sometimes, our parents try to live their lives through us and We must know when to stand our ground and say no

bukatyne:
Don't let go till the very end

My fellowship president waited about 5yrs before the parents agreed he married his wife.

The lady even had a terrible accident which which they claimed was a sign yet it did not deter him.

They are happily married today.

Sometimes, our parents try to live their lives through us and We must know when to stand our ground and say no

FOREXMARTS:
Hmmm okay most people fear "I won't have my parent's blessings if I go against their wish, they will cut me off or even curse me". Ehhhhhh I don hear but honestly I don't believe in all that balderdash. I learnt as early as a 13 year old that freedom comes with responsibility. You are responsible for the side of the divide you choose cos right now it's a kerosene/water situation you're in now. Here are the 4 possible outcomes.

1 You marry him in court damning the consequences and luckily marry the best man on earth.

2 You marry him in court damning the consequences and end up marrying the devil but you can't go back to ur parents now

3 You marry the man ur parents prefer and luckily marry the best man on earth.

4 You marry the man ur parents prefer and end up marrying the devil but can still escape back to ur parents.

My dear you must choose oh. Personally I follow my guts, prepare to take responsibility if the isshhhh hits the fan by having plan B,C,D and so on but we're two different people. Personally I go with option one. It's my life, I write my story, I can only be advised and guided by parents and elders but won't be coerced.

You could work with option 3 and 4 conservatively.

#runs out of thread through the window, peeps back in. Ladies am I safe to come in? (lol).

babyosisi:
Hahahahaha
A relative of mine had two serious suitors a Yoruba man and a man from my village
Her parents and everyone said nne forget that Yoruba man sharp sharp
The girl resisted,even ran away to Lagos a while
Her family stormed MFM praying her back,she eventually married my village man,big wedding etc
The man almost beat her to death they are now divorced
A new suitor comes along ,another Yoruba man ,they are now waiting for him to come with his people to bring wine and bride price

babyosisi:
Do whatever is within your power to make your dad come around
Find an uncle, an aunt ,a close family friend,his pastor,someone you know your dad loves and respects and go to them with your man and appeal to them.let the fiancé tell that person know how much he loves you and will treat you right and allow that person to advocate for you.

I will never ever advice any woman to marry a man without the blessings of her parents ,never!
A man may do it,never a woman
Unless your dad is genuinely crazy and a no good father but if you love and respect him and he has been a good father to you,do not go against his wishes to marry.
Besides the biblical injunction of honoring your father and mother,marriage is rough sometimes
If you don't have the support of your parents, that same man that is a prince in shining armor today could turn around tomorrow and use that against you and you will take abuse because you have no place to run to.
He won't regard your parents and that will hurt you
Not worth it
If this man is the one,they will come around and give you away properly.
When you have their backing,there is a message that goes out to your husband that this girl is coming from a family solidly behind her.
As a woman ,you need that

Herzumpther:
Same here. I've never disobeyed my dad....NEVER.

He just wants me to pick a hubby from the east.

Stillfire:
Have you ever disagreed with your dad before and how did you go about it? I suspect you haven't.
By independence I mean, do you have opinions of your own? Have you always been a Yes daddy, yes sir kind of person?
I know with African training, you can't go against your dad's wishes, they will use all the superstitions in this world to argue why you shouldn't counter their argument.
I am not saying you insult them, just be firm, practical and rational.
When dad says bla bla, respond and say Daddy I do not think I agree with you and give your reasons why succintly.
I can assure you they will throw a big tantrum. African parents have the biggest egos on earth, but maintain your stand.
If you have been doing this since you were 20 or so, they would have gotten with the program.

This advise is for adults o, not teenagers. If you're a teen and I catch you disobeying your parents ehn...

Stillfire:
Have you ever disagreed with your dad before and how did you go about it? I suspect you haven't.
By independence I mean, do you have opinions of your own? Have you always been a Yes daddy, yes sir kind of person?
I know with African training, you can't go against your dad's wishes, they will use all the superstitions in this world to argue why you shouldn't counter their argument.
I am not saying you insult them, just be firm, practical and rational.
When dad says bla bla, respond and say Daddy I do not think I agree with you and give your reasons why succintly.
I can assure you they will throw a big tantrum. African parents have the biggest egos on earth, but maintain your stand.
If you have been doing this since you were 20 or so, they would have gotten with the program.

This advise is for adults o, not teenagers. If you're a teen and I catch you disobeying your parents ehn...

FOREXMARTS:
You're at a crossroad now, you will have to decide between ur family and him. Trust me you don't want to hear or read my advice cos allot of people here will get it twisted so i'll leave you to decide.

Last bullet: You will be the one to live with who u marry not ur parents, they are not God. They have written their own marital book and now are writing urs. Okay nau.

bukatyne:
Same thing I told Herz...
Our parents are not always right and we get to live with their choices for the rest of our lives
If their choices are wrong, we live with it (they will only apologize)
It is well

Owliver:
yesterday summary. Le picture*

sleekyonyx:
@ sweet cutie, na 79 days remain, happy Sunday deary.