₦airaland Forum

Adaobi12:
congrats. hope you go send me IV?

*winks*

Adaobi12:
. so which tribe are you heading to?

paranorman:
wel, from my understanding, there are 3 types of dreams: ones from God, from the devil and ones as a result of your imaginations.
I also want to know the answer to this question. One thing is sure, if you'v got a confusing dream, talk to God about it if you'r a faithful child or someone who's spirirually matured and knowledgeable about dreams. God never fails, He is so sure! So, did you have a confusing dream?

Kingemmy01:
Regarding the 4000 online payment, there was preferential treatment in camp for those that paid. U can ask the previous C14

chidexSmokey:
Personal things dear plus don't want to go too far.

chidexSmokey:
Nna,thank you vely much. But I want Edo not Kano biko.

Gazaliah:
I guess ur inability to pay the 4k also delay ur mobilisation.
I wl advice u to pay dis time around or else,u will also wait till dose who paid will be mobilised...No be joke ooo.That payment of 4k gangan ni koko....
Cheers

Gazaliah:
Ur 4k payment is still intact..
U will only apply again by submitting all ur Information.
U ain't paying a dime for it cos u ave already paid bt not mobilised....

christybabe:
I am an Ada, my uncle always wanted me to marry in my village, because he said first daughters don't marry faraway. so I think the custom is still in the heart of some of our old uncles. As for my dad he didn't make it a must to marry from our village.

Adaobi12:
. Nothing. just want to have a feel of another tribe.

P.S Igbo men are still the best. esp my Anambra brothers.

Adaobi12:
Granny keeps hammering in my ear, Adaobi I ga anukwa onye beanyi . Ada anaghi aga mba . And am like Wah dah hell!!

I don't want to marry and Igbo man, have told God that. And He has somehow been answering my prayer.

When am ready to settle down, we will see to that.

Gazaliah:
When the online reg portal is re open,u ave to revalidate all ur Information.Without the revalidation tinz,u may not be mobilised cos its like u apply for a job and u are not choosen for final interview.Later anoda vacancy occur,will u still use the application letter u used the first tyme u applied

richybanky:
Lols.. Our information is already on nysc portal so no need of editing anything again unless if u want to make d online payment.. If den open d portal u will see dat all ur info ar still intact.
@bolded av bin following this thread from page 1, oya do d needful tin

richybanky:
No ma'am, majority of us in d house registered online for C14 batch bt one way or d other we missed d batch. Relax ur mind and feel free in d house by d way u will have to introduce urself to d house

Rosarie:
i dnt c u getting a solution here.go to GOD.u cnt fight anybody.if U RE MEANT TO B HE WILL CURE THE HEADACHE

Rosarie:
ve done dat.life is a choice.wish u d best

Rosarie:
ve done dat.life is a choice.wish u d best

Rosarie:
privillulov m an edo woman married to an edo man.esan by tribe.born school married first kud all in edo.benin.to b candid he might b good look deeeeeeepppppp at d familyyy esp in polygamy n juju aspect.cos foundation has a long wayy.re dey d types dat gved juju s room to b living means d guy go get some kind home demons.n dey love polygamy lik is a curse.nt ttyin to scare y.avoid pre marital sex or sin esp unforgivness to anyone.go on ur kness n ask GOD COS HE IS SUPREME DAN UR PARENTS:bf;nl or u

chaircover:
@Prissyluv I can imagine how you feel. It must be really hard

I wouldnt however ask you to go against your parents. What you need to do is to try everything you can to get them to accept this man as their son-in-law
If not for now but for the future.

Your man will also think twice knowing that you have a cordial relationship with your parents and family before he treats you badly. When he knows you have somewhere to go and someone to speak up for you if need be.
Your husbands family will also respect you more.
I am not saying that you wont have any issues with a man endorsed by your parents neither am i saying that if you go ahead and marry this man it will end in regret. I am not saying that.

Marriage already comes with its own stresses & ups and downs & to add family issues to it makes it nire stressful. I was listening to the radio one evening a few weeks ago and people were phoning in and talking about the effect of family fueds on their own marriage and many confessed that it did cause a big strain on their marriage and many went on to divorce.

Talk to your parents, think of ways you can convince them if you are sure that this is the man. Show them positive examples and try and allay all their fears. Most importantlu pray for Gods wisdom and Gods will to be done in your life. All the best.

subzidi:
I was partially in your shoes 4 years ago but difference being that my parents only voiced their opinion adjudged from preconceived prejudice about his tribe(Edo guy too). Trust me before I introduced him to my people I had the mind set that I was only respectfully informing them not really seeking their approval. Reasons being that I would be the one to live with the man and had made up of my mind that I'd rather live with my mistake than someone else's. If there is no Godly reason for objection to a choice of partner I think whatever reason is null and void. Today my hubby is the best son inlaw in the family! I'm not says parental opinion/blessing is not important but when it is being withdrawn under unfounded UnGodly reasons after trying your best to make them see reasons to accept your choiceplease run to God for blessings and carry on with marriage/life! Part of being an adult is the ability to make decisions and live with the consequences...
I'm sure you will not forgive yourself if you give up on this good man and marry someone else God forbid along the line things go sour...our parents will not be there forever and they have lived their own lives. MY OPINION
I wish you wisdom in your decision.

tonychristopher:
My dear as a married man
I will advise you that marriage us not a tea party
Do not go against your parents
Love is not enough in marriage
There are things like compatibilities be IG cultural intellectual and social
But as ada you have to marry near home but if you had not been ada you can protest ...as an ada in Igbo milieu there is this mantle on you
So what if your kid tomorrow disobeys you..how will you feel
Don't let them die a sad people
Respect their wishes
They are the god you see
I rest my case

tonychristopher:
But as a fact ...you are an ada and you should be nearer home and the house rest on you ..leave. the man
Respect your parents so that your days will be long on earth so that your kids will respect you
What the elder sees sitting down
The child won't see on hill top
Enough said

tonychristopher:
It depends
If its Igbo speaking areas of Delta and Edo ..they are basically the same all over Igbo land just a little Benin elements

cococandy:
i don't know much about burial rites. But I know our attitude towards marriage and theirs is not the same.
But personal differences should also be put into consideration hence a generalization may not be fair in this kind of situation.
It is the little things. Just be prepared to weather any storm that comes with being raised in a different culture as long as you're in harmony with your husband. And I hope your guy is ready to compromise too.

cococandy:
Lol @bold. What if you married a man from your area and you guys end up living abroad. Will he insist your family stay back so that he can visit easily or so that you can come home easily during an emergency? That's not a reason at all.

But do your best to get their approval. If you have to beg your uncles and aunties to talk to him.
What about your mother? Do you have siblings? Let them meet and relate with your guy. The more people in your family or circle that know him and like him,the easier it will be for you to have voices on your side when you go crying to your dad for permission again:

cococandy:
Yea @bolded poses difficulties I won't lie to you. Speaking from experience as an Igbo girl married to a delta man(close to Benin in culture)
If for some reason one day you don't have your husband solidly behind you, you could find it very difficult.
Their way of life is very different from what you know and you won't discover that now until you spend a good amount of time with them.
But love conquers all. Right?
We hope so.
Don't forget your prayers too.

eagleeye2:
Please age is not reason enough to marry without parental consent. i have equally met good ladies who were way past there 30s and still married on their own terms.
My cousin sister is one. My very close and personal person is another. And they have their own kids now.
.
I have equally met or seen those who went into marriage with their supposed 'Mr Right' who can never do any wrong and later they confessed yo have made a error in judgment.

Wendy80:
prissyluv
Hi Dear, I remember Ur thread abt Ada n distant marriage. So ds battle is still on? Hmm na wa o. Just like some1 said do all u can to get dia consent. Cry, beg, cajole and get pple they respect to speak for U.
I'm an Ada and only Daughter yet I married outside my tribe, what matters to my family is Ur happiness.
The Lord is Ur Strength.
Ur Man will marry U by God's Grace

Chrisbenogor:
Prissyluv - Love is Never Enough.

Parental Consent is key as long as you live in Africa. Most times the things our parents understand we probably dont. Sometimes it has stemmed from history, certain people do not marry well from other places due to cultural differences. Its not that it is impossible to work out, it just probably harder. It is imperative to try your best to understand where their real fears lie, talk to more receptive people.....maybe older uncles in a bid to understand where your dad is coming from. That would make you decide on a better course of action.

I had a close friend of mine explain the Osu thing to me, and while I could not wrap my head around it. This was the reality that they lived, so your first task is to actually break down what the opposition to the guy is. Is it cultural, is it financial or is it a combination of many factors. Until you know exactly why you might not be able to get a good course of action.


So try to be less emotional and go about finding out the real reasons.

edwife:
My dear i won't lie,you are in a very difficult situation....but by the end of the day you will be the one to live with the man be it your parent's choice or yours.
It is going to drain you if you go against their wish,marriage is a family affair in this part of the world....Yes we still african and parent's consent is of great importance.
If in your heart,you love this man and ready to spend your life with him,the type that does not come home after a small misunderstanding or quarrel then try to convince your parents.What your dad feels is fear and nothing else,make him understand that it is your choice of spouse,that anything is afraid that will happen,won't happen.Give him example of people you know that has been married away from home,beg him if you have to....but by the end of the day it is YOU that matters.