LordAdam16:
Apologies for the delay in my response.
As always, I'll open with a disclaimer (when necessary):
I'm MGTOW. By default, I'm a proponent of 1 Corinthians 7:1. As such, it's fair to actively parse my comment for bias and I may not be the best person to listen to on purple pill matters.
That said, the good thing is quite a portion--if not a majority of commercially successful media personalities in the manosphere are purple-pillers. So there isn't a shortage of good advice from folks who've taken the same path you intend to and who you might better relate with on shared experiences.
Take this remarkable comment by pansophist for example ('twas a response to yet another blue-pilled complainant):
If you need a precis or a pocketbook guide to committed relationships for a redpiller in the 21st century, importantly by someone who is walking the talk, that's as concise as it'd get.
The template is reproducible and easy to grasp.
A: Be certain of what you want.
B. Know what you'd compromise on and what you wouldn't compromise on.
C. Be willing to take your leave if she fails to meet her end of the bargain on a key benefit in the "no compromise" column.
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Now, maybe you want to hear what I have to say on the subject. In which case, I'd oblige.
I'd answer your question first. Then touch on the wider subject matter for emphasis
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Your question was:
Seeking women who are into the culture of previous generations is still possible in traditional climes like ours. However, times are changing for everyone and she'll inevitably be influenced by the changes. Especially if you reside in an urban setting or your own attempts at self-improvement offer her the opportunity to see first-hand what 'modern' women are up to and the complete insanity they can get away with.
Now you might be fortunate that she stays traditional ad infinitum. But the odds of that are low.
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You may have heard the expression:
Hard times create strong men, Strong men create good times, Good times create weak men, and Weak men create hard times.
This is relevant because by definition, culture is the way of life of a particular group of people. We are at the "good times create weak men" stage, which explains the changing culture. Thinking you can flip the script as a one-man army is wishful thinking.
To be accurate, we've been down this road before. In times of weariness and disaster, women don't care about rights. They just want to be safe and have access to resources. Of course, men have to bear the brunt of it and pay with our lives. However, when hard times are over and things are blissful, they get their rights without much prodding.
Ancient Egyptian women during the Middle Kingdom had more rights than modern Egyptian women. Why wouldn't they? The Empire was the dominant power on the planet, there was zero unemployment, little to no social mobility, and the concept of Ma'at meant everyone knew their place and their roles in keeping the empire running.
Spartan women had more rights than Athenian and even Persian women. Why wouldn't they? Their men subjugated a slave population that outnumbered the native Spartan population and they were feared on the battlefield. Like today with Western women having machines perform all their menial tasks. Spartan women had slaves do all their menial tasks.
Likewise with Roman women (citizens) compared to their contemporaries.
With the end of World War II and the ensuing prosperity and bliss, the same thing is happening with Western women.
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Now in the past, because of existential threats, there were hard limits to how much leeway women could get when times were good.
Today, most of those existential threats are no more with sovereignty, rules of engagement, war crimes, the ratification of fundamental human rights, mutually assured destruction and other fail-safe mechanisms.
As such, eventually that culture of previous generations that you fondly reminisce about will die out as simping becomes the gold standard. And those of us who live in urban settings or in the West/West-leaning conclaves are on the front-row.
This explains why it is not accurate to use some of the enduring longstanding marriages of yesteryears as templates for today. Ma Adeboye will not tell Pa Adeboye to go sleep on the couch after an argument. Joke Silva does not expect Olu Jacobs to share the chores 50:50. So while they celebrate their golden jubilees and you're fantasizing about replicating it or using them as #relationshipgoals, understand that the pillars and culture that made that possible are not available to you.
To get to that same point, be prepared to be chewed inside out and embark on a wildly different and rigorous journey.
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Thus, if you still decide to go for committed relationships, even though contemporary culture puts you at a disadvantage; the last thing you want to do is hope to find a unicorn. The idea of unicorns is that they're rare. Not enough to go round, are always sought after even if they're spoken for, and that at the end of the day, they're still horses.
A traditional woman is still a woman. And to give a lucid instance, most of the diaspora men who failed to realize that fact by inviting "women who are into the culture of previous generations" from Nigeria were sharply lectured with cold, hard horror experiences.
The best you can do is prepare for the worst and hope for the best.
Mind you, this is not as nihilistic as it sounds. This is not to mean that you would not have happy times in a committed relationship or marriage as a purple-piller. Especially if you continue to improve yourself and apply TRP nuggets shared here.
Heck, there are a lot of purple-pillers who say the good times are worth the risk and eventual lull periods. In any case, it's not my place to question your reality. That's one of the few good things about the current climate and one I hope more TRPillers take advantage of, you're at liberty to do whatever makes you happy.
Just remember that as investment bankers say "past performance is no guarantee of future results" and ensure you've made appropriate preparations or contingency plans should you become a statistic. Because we only hear complaints after the women have showed their wild side. But when modern men are feeling like Jay Z thinking they have their partners wrapped around their fingers, rather than make hay while the sun shines, they're usually reckless both in words and deeds.
Don't be reckless.
1. Enter every relationship with a clear idea of what you expect to get out of it and what you can reasonably expect to sacrifice.
If you're going in because you prefer to raise your kids in a nuclear family and are willing to sacrifice your individuality, many of your dreams, some of your cherished friendships, amongst many other things. Then by the gods, if years later she becomes insufferable that it begins to affect the family unit and your kids well being, read her the Riot Act.
2. I have to repeat this, have a clear idea of what you can reasonably expect to sacrifice.
Everything has a price. Including entering a marriage or a committed relationship. It might not sound like a big deal now. But 12 years later, you'd wake up, look at her face as she sleeps and wonder "how the f*ck was I so arrogant to believe I could deal with this sh*t for decades".
3. If you're improving yourself, she should be too.
If you choose to overlook this or tolerate her nasty, that's your prerogative and should be your choice. Don't be knackered into believing that while you're working on yourself and literally sucking up to your boss to maintain your lifestyle and not lose her, that her flaws are a package deal that you MUST accept without her even attempting to work on them.
In the 21st century, that's a pile of crap. If marriage is work, you should not be the only one stacking bricks.
4. Live in the moment, enjoy the little things, and soak up the experiences.
Because it might not last, it might be all that gets you through the bad times, it might be your only respite when you look back on your misadventure, or even be a critical reason why your marriage, civil union, or committed relationship lasts.
5. Have an insurance plan.
Whether it's walking away, getting a mistress, separation, signing a prenup if you're in the diaspora, having a sizable nest egg that can't be touched even if she goes scorched earth; never as a rule of thumb let yourself be at the mercy of a woman (or any human being for that matter).
Don't tempt fate! And don't let anyone guilt-trip you into thinking looking out for yourself means you don't "love" her enough. That should go both ways, if she "loves" you enough, she should want you to be happy if things don't work out.
6. Doing all these things and more does not guarantee anything.
People discover new things about themselves. Circumstances change and people react differently to change. Also, everyone has a breaking point.
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In fairness, I'll admit, it is depressing.
Most guys out there are just looking for dependable companionship, respect, and appreciation and are willing to walk to the ends of the earth for any woman who'd provide that or even the mere illusion of that. Unfortunately, they have to go searching through treacherous terrain for something their grand and great grand fathers probably took for granted.
That said, in the voice of Eneke the Bird, "Since [hunters] have learned to shoot without missing, I have learned to fly without perching."
Be like Eneke the Bird.
-Lord Burst my brain! |
Computers › Re: Post Your Computer (PC) Troubles Here. by Quoteit: 8:46pm On Sep 25, 2021
i made a post a couple of years ago that korede bello will have a spiritual awakening based on his astrological alignments. ITS HAPpENING. let me look for that post