₦airaland Forum

InfernoNig:
This one pass us oo.

Hmnnn

Plesse forget the errors and focus on the content.

So here’s my issue.

I’ve been married for 6yrs and it’s been a blissful journey- of course with minor issues here and there but nothing to worry about until May 5th 2020 when I’d say things turned upside down.

We live abroad and struggled to have kids but God finally blessed us with a beautiful daughter in Sept 2019. Child care being super expensive here, we wanted one of our moms to come help us with the baby when I return to work after my maternity leave. So on the eve of our wedding anniversary which was the 4th of May last year, I asked my husband for the say 10th time about beginning the procedure of bringing a mom over to help since I’ll be returning to work. He asked which mom and I said in my exact words; “of course my mom” because I know that when a woman gives birth, her mom usually go to help her. Did that change our story? My God, marriage has been one hell of a thing since that day.

My husband said I am selfish, disrespectful, and want to dominate him. He said things will never be the same again and since then, my marriage has been a stress zone.

My husband is numb to my feelings. He’s been ignoring me, I’ve been a nag I’ll admit since tue incident last year. I now talk alot and mostly complain about everything whenever we are together. It’s sad and I’ve actually had conversations with myself to ignore him and stop nagging but I continue to do it, I need help on how to shut up and observe.

I can cry from now to die kingdom come and this man wouldn’t be moved. He cannot shift his stance because of me at all. He does whatever he likes and disregard everything I say. E.g before this crisis, we had an appointment to see our Dr to start trying for baby number two because the Dr’s advised that since we just had a baby, it’s best to try for another soonest given that we had challenges conceiving the first one. This man cancelled the appointment with our Dr and has blatantly refused to start trying for a baby right now. He says when the time comes he’ll let me know. Up till now the time has not come despite the fact that delaying may impact our chance of conceiving again. What a life!� � �.

Also, he has decided that......

https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/20/what-will-you-do-in-a-marriage-like-mine/

Major Reason Muslim Women Prefer To Marry Christian Men; by Mcebiscoo

In the past, especially here in my country Nigeria, we believed that it’s unfair, unlawful and against Islamic beliefs for Muslim Women to marry a Christian man.

But nowadays, it seems our eyes have opened, we now see a Muslim family allowing their daughters to marry a Christian man, now we see marriages as.....

https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/22/why-muslim-women-love-marring-christian-men/

Nice one

Vickiebam:
Let your husband know about him
Tell him the complete details
Let him know that it ur cousin that did it not u
Hide nothing from him
If he loves you,he will understand
And am sure he will be mature enough to handle the case
He will even Join you in prayers
Ur life also is not safe

Good day ma,

Hide my details. I am scared about what I am about to reveal but I need your advise. Seven years ago, I got divorced from someone I was married to for six years. Throughout the marriage, its was hell. He was a cheat and we were childless. It was the worst six years of my life.

They said I had ovarian cyst and he my husband had low sperm count. His family was not kind to me. Every we quarreled and everyday he cheated with all kinds of women. I kept enduring cos I was praying to God to give me children and prophecies came that I will give birth to my own children. So, I held on in prayers even despite the daily fights and humiliation.

The straw that broke the Carmel's back was when one of my husband's women claimed she got pregnant and they tried to hide it from me, my husband and his family. I eventually found out when the woman out to bed and had twins. That was like a huge slap on my face. The family moved her into our home...I had to leave cos....



https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/22/my-ex-husband-humiliated-me-but-now-he-needs-me-to-save-his-life-pls-advise/

hmnnn

Hello ma,
Please post and hide my name. My name is Rita (not real name). I am 39 years old. I am single and doing very well for myself. As you can imagine, husband matter has been an issue since I clocked 30 years. I have dated, I have been engaged...and disappointed . I have not been fortunate...lets just summarize it like that...

So,my girlfriend introduced me to someone who has been doing their laundry since my own laundry guy decided to steal from me. So, this new Laundry guy shows up at my door, fine looking tall guy...I was like wow...but he was so polite and professional. He took the laundry...and told me when he would return them.

When he returned them days later,he waited patiently as I tried to transfer the payment to him. After I paid him, he said thank you. And then asked me to forgive him for asking: he asked if I was single...I said yes...he smiled and that was how the flirting started.

I think my friend may have even set this laundry guy situation. By the end of the month, I was....

https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/21/my-boyfriends-family-is-trying-to-manipulate-our-relationship-pls-advise/

To sample other opinion i think

HRHQueenPhil:
U have decided what to do,so why ask us?
Anyway for those that have experienced death in their family this January,am inviting u to living Faith church winners chapel.its our covenant day of exemption.look for.any winners near u and attend. Congratulations

hmnnnnnn

Twenty8:
DNA test and men should be like 5&6 just like women and paternity fraud.

THUNDER4real:
Un-caught her and you will be re-employmed.

Hello,
My name is Jolade (not real name). I am 26years old , just finished my HND, awaiting service cos my school had some issues and so we are delayed.  I decided to get a job in the town. My friend told me a new restaurant was opening around August last year and so I applied.

I got a job as sales.
The IT manager was transferred from the restaurants head office in Lagos. Lets call him Vincent. Vincent is a very handsome guy. Every girl had their eyes on him. He was also very intelligent and friendly. I usually just say hi to him, that is all.

After some weeks, he called me to say he has been watching me. That he sees that I am a decent girl and he would like for us to be friends. I wondered why me of all the girls in the office?

He just said something about me is different.
Dating Vincent was a secret because of office policy. But it was a very nice relationship.. He genuinely cared about me, always checking on me...asking me if I was ok...I tried to fix my off days with his own duty off days . We spent alot of our free time together. He was very surprised I was a virgin.

Vincent spoke to me about my future, he seemed very interested in my welfare. He talked about his future plans with me and I was really happy to be in love with such a smart kind and ambitious man. I felt God had answered my prayers.

All was well until towards end of December last year. Vincent all of a sudden started...


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/20/my-manager-fired-me-after-i-caught-her-cheating-on-her-husband-pls-advise/

Hello ma,

I have been struggling with the decision to either share my story or not. My heart is heavy and I need a release of what to do. I know some people will curse me out for what I am about to say but I just want to do the right thing and stop wronging the man that loves me.

So, I am a single mother living in Abuja. I got pregnant for someone who lied to me...I did not know he was married. I was already pregnant before I knew. He is a well placed man in society and he has been taking care of me and my child very well.
I live in a duplex and I have my cars. I am just saying, I am comfortable. I stopped seeing my baby daddy after he revealed he was married. The only contact I have with him is that ...he sends money for his child, pays my rent and gives me money now and then.

My child is 7 years old and I am lonely. I have dated a few unserious guys who do not want commitment...just to sleep with you cos you are fine but not talk marriage cos you have a child. So last year, I....


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/19/all-i-wanted-was-a-man-to-marry-me-but-an-affair-is-holding-me-back-pls-advise/

Sex talk cannot be over emphazied cos it's very necessary for healthy marriage[
quote author=CalliDora1 post=98201305]Everywhere sex talks.[/quote]

If you see these signs in your man, chances are that he wants you to do better at meeting his sexual needs.

What everyone agrees to, though, is that s*x is very important to the happiness in a relationship. S*x creates stronger bonds, it is the one thing that you can’t [ideally] do with anyone else than your partner.

It is the exclusive thing you share with them and for that reason, it take a exalted place when many people list the things they want in a potential relationship.

It’s not just s*x that people want though. It is good s*x, satisfactory s*x. In the way that your partner likes and desires from you constantly. And it is important to give it to them in that way.

Below, we list the things you will see if your partner does not really enjoy s*x with you that much......


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/18/for-women-signs-that-your-man-isnt-enjoying-sex-with-you/

Hello ma,

I am a young married woman. My marriage is about 3 years and I love my husband and he loves me very much. We have two small children. Before marriage, I never saw my husband as someone he is trying to portray and that is truly worrying me.

Truth...he is a good man, very caring and supports me but I have found out that he is a very moody person and that is truly affecting our relationship. Two areas where he displays this behavior is when we have any misunderstanding...and when he is maybe going through some pressure from work.

I know that people have mood swings but I have not experienced a man having long mood swings like my husband. If we have a misunderstanding, especially if I am the one that is right, instead of him to talk to me about it or apologize, he starts keeping quiet or his mood changes from being happy to being withdrawn.

When I try to talk to him, to get him out...


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/18/how-do-you-handle-a-married-man-who-keeps-having-mood-swings/

fear! fear!!

James4358:
See risk o! What if the food was poisoned. When i have issues with my wife, i mk sure i settle it & she's vry happy b4 i eat her food! Never underestimate the power of a woman if u want to live long!

Yes oooh!

thesicilian:
Everyone knows that not all relationships end in marriage

Are you from Agbor? That is my village ooo

jjcena:
I'll come down at Agbor, I no go reach warri

Hello,
Please hide my identity. I am not happy and I feel like I have entered on chance in my life. It started like this: two years ago, I was travelling from Benin to Warri. I met a young girl in the bus. I tried to chat with her but she seemed very shy. But she left me her number.

I called her later and we chatted for some weeks ...she wanted to know my intentions towards her. I told her friendship that will lead to marriage. She agreed.

We started dating. I found out she was in final year of her HND program.

Things were going fine. I liked her alot. Very calm and very reserved. Just before the end of 2019, around October, she finished her program and told me she was coming back home. I was happy.

When she returned, she packed her things and came to my place.
I was surprised. I asked her why she moved into my place cos I never discussed her moving in with me before marriage.

She said, her mother said to her that she must not graduate and come back to her house. That it was always her plan to graduate and go to her husband's house.

Mind you, we have only dated for like 7 months. My plan was that we will get married after...



https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/16/my-girlfriend-her-mother-are-planning-to-ruin-my-life-pls-advise/

Hello ma,

My name is Felicia (not real name). I am 31 years old. I got married when I was 24 years to my boyfriend. Actually I got pregnant and my family insisted on marriage. My husband has never been a faithful man right from day one. That made me decide not to have another baby after my first child.

I mean, the behavior is bad. He is sleeping with several women. Sometimes, I read his text and I even see some women fighting each other over him. He is so promiscuous...I truly wish I knew him more before getting pregnant...I would not have found myself in this position.

Initially, when I complained about his cheating, he said he did not want to marry...that I used pregnancy to trap him. So, I can leave when I am tired. I admit, I should actually leave because this man has no respect for me.

The only thing he does is...

https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/15/i-regret-getting-married-but-i-must-decide-to-stay-married-or-loose-everything-pls-advise/

hmnnn

RisenPhoenix1:
By "also cheat in the marriage" do you mean have extra marital affairs? Of course not. You are oversimplifying the issue and reducing its effect to a single point in time. In real life, that would be unrealistic.

RisenPhoenix1:
What is disturbing you now? His extra marital affairs or his alleged cheating? Because when it comes to married men, the two events are not the same. A man can only cheat his wife when he does not fulfill his financial responsibilities towards her, but gives money to other women instead. But a married man sleeping with other women is not cheating, because in a marriage, there is no implied exclusivity from the man. He doesn't carry a pregnancy, there is no possibility of fraud if he has extra marital affairs, and the bloodline is not affected. It is only reprehensible because of the possibility of STDs, and because the man tends to be fearful of his wife and keep it secret, causing her to be mistrustful of him later on. That is why I advocate for officially sanctioned polygyny instead, when a man wants to sleep with more than one woman; and he is capable of fulfilling his financial responsibility to both (or more).

So if he is still fulfilling his financial responsibility towards you and the children, he's not cheating you. Just tell him to marry other women of he feels the need, or to at least inform you so you can liaise with her and all parties can take proper precautions (like regular checkups) to prevent STDs.

Good luck.

Good day,

I have evidences that my husband of 11 years is having extra marital affairs. It hurts. I first discovered in march 2019 with a lady on our street in the estate we stay. I asked him then but it got all messy and I experienced domestic violence with him.

People (families on both sides) intervened then, but to my shock, I was told :you don't ask a man why he was cheating ...its normal in this part of the world! that i should just face the care for my children and make myself happy with them.

Since then, I tried to manage information I have about him still cheating on me with other women. In fact, I am advised to look away anytime he goes on the supposed adventures,  I was told its mid-life crisis that I should keep praying for him. I am trying to but, it is not easy  for me.

I am beginning to think of considering a friend to be intimate with as well. He has been there all through this experience. He is still there, but I......


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/14/if-cheating-is-normal-for-all-men-how-do-i-keep-my-marriage-going/

Good afternoon ma,

My name is Peace(not real) I am in a relationship about a year now, I met my boyfriend at my place of work, he is so nice and caring. Everything I have prayed for is what he is, he loves me so much that he is proud to tell people that I am his girlfriend.

This year, he is planning to travel to Ghana, though before then I have left the work since we started dating because I can't be dating my colleague. There is on girl at the same work, when she heard that we were dating, she became jealous and was angry.

During that lockdown at the work, they were so close and she could not hold it anymore. She now told my boyfriend that she is in love with him. He was surprised and he came to tell me, I told him that you are the man here. So you have to choose between the two of us.

He was angry with me, that why will I say......

https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/13/my-boyfriend-has-never-let-me-down-but-prophesy-says-he-will-dump-me-pls-advise/

This is Quite Inspiring

I had a quarrel with my wife yesterday morning. She was angry with me and I was also very angry with her. I tried to tell her what she did was bad, and all I wanted was for her to accept corrections.

She in turn had her own reasons for doing what she did, and she blames it on me for making her do what she had done. Not until I accept my own mistake, she was not ready to accept hers.

We shouted vehemently at each other before I left the house. I had no time to listen to her anymore, as I was already tired of exchanging words and as such, I was already running late for work.

While walking away she said to me.

“Come back here. So you are now running? Keep running. Run and I will be here waiting for you. But just know there will be no dinner for you. In fact, I won’t cook for you anymore.”

“Who even wants to eat your food? I will not eat.” I fired back at her angrily before driving off.

That day after work, while driving home, I thought to myself. Hence she was not going to be cooking for me, I in turn decided to stay back late and not eat. I stopped by at a friends house and we got talking for a while. He was married and his wife had also become a very good friend of my wife.

They asked me what had happened and why I had refused going home. I explained things to them. I told them about the fight I had with my wife that morning, and how she had failed to see things my way. We laughed over it. They tried to advise me to go home, but I noticed they were also careful not to take sides.

I later returned home by 10pm that night. Although I was no more angry, I had prepared myself for the worst.

When I got back home I found my food long served on the dining. It was still warm. I was famished and walked to the plates already salivating. When I opened them the aroma of a sweetly cooked vegetable soup welcomed me. I didn’t waste anytime. I immediately sat down and began to eat.

While eating my wife appeared behind me. She wrapped her arms around my neck and whispered in my ears.

“Thought you said you will not eat my food again.”

Just then it struck me. How we say things we don’t mean out of anger. How we promise things we can’t keep just because we needed to make those promises. I had to cover my small shame, so I raised my head and stared into her eyes.

“Thought you said you won’t cook for me again.”

“You know I always do. You just didn’t want to understand me. You were so annoying.” She said

She sat beside me and explained in a better way. I understood with her. I realised I also had a fault. Probably the vegetable soup I was eating was now re arranging my head to factory settings. I apologised for failing to understand her earlier. She also apologised too

So many relationship have shattered because of the lack of understanding and ego between both parties.
So many words which have been said out of anger, have also been taken seriously

I have come to understand that the ability of partners to understand themselves, determines when quarrels are being resolved.

Don’t let a night pass without you resolving a fight between you and your partner. If one partner refuses to drop his or her ego, drop yours and make peace.

It is the first step to reconciliation.


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/12/no-dinner-for-you-to-night/

greatness77:
are u drunk? OP how old is your wife? is she your elder or younger sister? answer fast I want to bombard you
nuclear radiative fallout curses LOADING........
ans me fast before I start bombarding you with amphibious and electromagnetic curse dat will isolate u on nairaland for decades

hmnnn

My husband and I celebrated twenty-eight years of marriage on December 19, 2020. Even though our anniversary is a sleigh ride away from Christmas, we try to get away for a couple of days to reflect on the past year and set goals for the coming year of marriage.
As we look over our list and check it twice, we often find we didn’t even come close to meeting all our goals. Some we’ll carry over to the next year, others are no longer applicable, but it’s always encouraging when we check off those we managed to accomplish.

Praying and brainstorming over the next year, we each set a few personal goals but our focus is arriving at those we mutually agree will enhance our marriage and family. Some years, the lists are longer than other years. We’re not trying to reach a specific number, but we do want each goal to be achievable.
Why Should We Have Marriage Goals?

Our annual goal setting and review has helped us maintain spiritual, personal, and marital growth in our relationship. Even if you’re not typically a “goal-setting” person, you probably do set some expectations for your marriage: where you’re going to live, what type of a house, how many kids, where will you work, what church to attend . . . . Life is full of decisions and married couples make most of them together.

Here are a few parameters to consider when setting goals:


https://livelystones.ng/2021/01/12/how-i-got-entangled-with-the-nicest-man-but-his-wife-wants-him-back/

Good morning sir, Pls were can i get this 6years summary?

DrAwo:
Fidelity Bank 6 year financial analysis...
Enjoy...