₦airaland Forum

tolu001:
Yesterday (sunday) while addressing an event for Widows, Patience Jonathan wife of the President Goodluck Jonathan started her speech thus: MY FELLOW WIDOWS.

Your husband is still alive please.

***faints***

agabaI23:
“If you carry ya women rish dia, protect ya vote; they have expand Enugu airport to make sure you can flew ya goods to south east, atink my husband & him junior broda have do well. mind you, we women have short time to born shidren, man can born shidren till 100yrs so dont let mans to use ya shidren as militancy or as togs or army robbering, ask ya youths to enter house.” - Dame PATIENCE JONATHAN

Agaba oooo,agaba agaba,you too lie.Oya gimme a link where she yarn like that

But dat woman sha,she can dey fall hand,ahh ahhh

Watching Ghanaians who managed to escape into Tunisia,plead with tears in their eyes and frustartion written all over their faces,for their government to come and take them home,makes me really appreciate what the administration of President Jonathan has done in Egypt and is currently doing in Libya.

You need to see the anger and dissappointment being expressed by the nationals of Ghana who were abandoned by their country

Kudos again GEJ

Ribadu ribadu,ribadu,,,,I've heard that name somewhere,,,errr is he running for an elective office in his local governmnet or what
Ribadu ,who the guy be again ooo

agabaI23:
So professor Pat Utomi has embezzled or is he not a presidential candidate?

Don't mind the political infants that know not their history and are too lazy to get their facts.
There are 18 aspirants in all for the office of president,C-in-C of the armed forces FRN,come April elections.How many of them do they know,only to come here and mouth off shay Buhari,shay Buhari as if that counts for electoral votes

OBJ baba,I know say you dey kampe,funny enuff you no even dey hear the yeye tins wey som small small pikins dey yarn for here

Needs to be given more zest. IMO
Good concept though

I hope all the noise makers on this thread will do something as opposed to saying something when it's election time.I can almost bet that more than half of these useless Buhari supporters(no offence meant please,as your purported support on nairaland is useless to the man if you will not vote) may not actually vote,neither will they mobilise foot soldiers to actually go and vote
We are working hard to ensure that the incumbent;Mr President,Dr Goodluck Jonathan records a massive victory at the polls come April.

Believe me,hard work pays

egift:
Then why are you piling your skin?

Buhari will cut off the straw all the corrupt politician have been using to milk this nation dry. And let me add - anyone that don't want this Nation to move forward, Holy Ghooooooost![/b]

egift:
@Poster: I have only one question for you - [b]Will you be offended if when elected, Buhari cease the passport of anyone that have partaked illegally in collecting Billions daily from the Nations purse?

Blue murder
Please mr,do get someone to edit/proofread your posts before banging on the send button

Ah ah,see as you just dey murder English,abi na by force to post

I no fit shat boh,we guys too eff up yesterday

TCD:
And you who is 'pro-jesus' is calling one a 'demonic b.I.t.c.h'. Way to go boss. Jesus is reeeaaal proud of ya. Lmao

You must be the most uneducated nairalander around,do you know that there's such a term as demonic and such a term a being bi.t.chy,oh I should pretend to be typing from a pulpit to please youNigga please

.

nateevs:
Against which team is Arsenal's match-in-hand ?

Lative Doctor,why uu dey ask,here la shesi caban

I really hope so,I was so downcast after yesterday's game,moreso when we are so good and so close to winning silverware this season,I just pray the lads are up for it,by any means neccessary

O--se,Liverpool,hmmmmm

http://westerngh.com/2010/04/oprah-winfrey-opens-church-founds-religion/

Talk-show host Oprah Winfrey today celebrated the opening of her first church and the founding of her new religion, titled O, The Oprah Religion. The multi-tasking Oprah will serve as pontiff and deity for both.
“Expanding on Her enormously successful enterprises in television, film, the web, and Her magazine, Oprah Winfrey brings Her positive, motivational spirit to one of the most highly anticipated new religions since Scientology,” explained spokesperson and new Archbishop for the church, Gayle King, in a press conference in Chicago today.

“O, The Oprah Religion gives confident, smart women the tools they need to explore and reach for their dreams, to express their individual style, and to make choices that will lead to a happier and more fulfilling afterlife.”

“In addition, we’ve eliminated the regressive prohibitions – such as those against shrimp, clothing made of mixed fibers, and premarital sex – that older, outmoded religions still cling to, but which no longer fit in with the lifestyles of their congregations. In fact, Oprah loves to share a shrimp cocktail with her live-in life partner while wearing stretch-wool slacks! Now, with O, The Oprah Religion, you can do the same, and without the threat of everlasting damnation!”

King went on, “O, The Oprah Religion, has all the comforts of a traditional belief system, but combined with the uplifting spirit of Oprah, so that anyone from a religious background will still feel at home when they convert the new traditions of O, The Oprah Religion.”

“For example, instead of a spring fertility festival like Easter or Passover, with O, The Oprah Religion, you’ll celebrate the abundance of Oprah with Her spring holiday Oprah’s Favorite Things, which is observed during the second week of spring sweeps. During this holiday, believers smear the blood of a freshly slaughtered lamb on their television, and in the middle of the day the Holy Spirit of Oprah visits all supplicants and showers them with cashmere pajamas, gourmet chocolates, and Gladware”

“It doesn’t stop there!” added Archbishop King. “The Catholic tradition of confession has been incorporated into O, The Oprah Religion, but with a twist: confession occurs just once per lifetime, is syndicated nationally, and is officiated over by Oprah herself. Since Oprah serves as both pontiff and God in human form, penance is unnecessary, forgiveness is guaranteed, and it’s all done without the use of an intercessor! Verily I say unto thee: O, The Oprah Religion empowers all women with the tools for their own salvation! Praise be!”

Though Winfrey herself officiated over the opening ceremonies for the First Church Of Oprah, Savior, located on Chicago’s Magnificent Mile, O, The Oprah Religion does not require or even encourage Church attendance. Instead, believers are urged to stay home and watch services on their televisions. Regular broadcasts will be held every weekday at 11am. An additional service is planned for the most devout, to be called Oprah, After The Service.

Following her introductory remarks, Archbishop King spread her hands to the heavens, and Oprah herself appeared in the sky overhead, swathed in blindingly white robes and a pair of black leather knee-high boots with stiletto heels. Before Her, a mixed crowd of pre- and post-menopausal women shrieked in excitement, weeping openly at the heavenly vision. Several attendees were so overcome that they collapsed in pools of their own urine.

“Blessed are all who come before Me,” intoned Oprah after floating down to the podium, “and Blessed are all women who come to terms with things! Blessed also is this interesting hand-carved pepper mill; it is one of My Favorite Things! There’s one in each of your gift bags!”

With a flourish of trumpets from an unseen orchestra, production assistants scurried through the crowd, handing out gift bags to all and dispensing Egyptian cotton towels to the women who had wet themselves.

“Blessed is My church, enter ye now and view My services on the giant screen flat-panel Sony television within!” Continued Oprah, “Look within yourself, for you can overcome all obstacles when you believeth in yourself! Look also within your gift bag, as you all get a certificate for a free flat-panel Sony television of thine own!”

With a gesture from Her hands, the doors to the church swept open, and the crowds rushed forth to enter the church as an ivory chariot descended from the sky, whisking Oprah away to her apartment.

“Peace be with you! Praise be to Me!” she yelled as she drove out of sight.

In addition to Oprah’s Favorite Things, other holidays planned for the religion include The Feast Of The Assumption Of Maya Angelou, celebrated each summer with a poetry reading and live bird release, and the month-long Stedmanadon in the fall. Following similar marketing plans by the Kabbalah Center, a line of scented candles in the works, tentatively titled O, The Oprah-scented Candle, though plans for bottled water have been cancelled due to legal problems with Cirque Du Soleil.
Source: Davis McDavis

I've always known that Oprah is anti Jesus,but it's okay.
I only pity all those who idolise the demonic b.i.t.ch,she'll be fully exposed in due time.

Scousers O se,according to D'banj

Limaoscar:
Victor Ikepba's"shisharito" scores!!

Ikpeba is a NAFDAC certified DUNCE

debosky:
Bloody hell! Suarez wants to end Evra's career today.

OMG

I'm laughing so HAAAAAARD

RuuDie:


3pts gap. . . .good, good. good - e se' o gunnars!

Welcome,meanwhile Liverpool is fukcing y'all real bad in three orifices

The scousers are murdering the scummies

  why could we not take 3 points from yesterday's game 

^^^
I wouldn't expect you to understand the logic;what for somebody who thinks Ribadu is presidential material ppfffffttt
Well per ur siggy,people fear what they don't understand,hate what they CAN'T CONQUER

Gbawe:
Ribadu , now and for the future . You don't understand that concept . [/b].

How can I understand a utopian concept that only exists in the figments of the imaginations of a few apolitical fellows that keep masquerading on the internet as if they understand politics or that they have or indeed can muster any political value.

Ribadu will be so content to be addressed as a one time presidential aspirant for the rest of his life,as this is the closest he'll ever come to the presidency,four years on,ACN Tinubu is more likely to field his wife as ACN's presidential candidate and Ribadu may have to contest for the chairmanship of his LGA,else he'll go into final political oblivion .

He'll end up like the Bashir Tofas,Kris Okoties etc of this world who at one time or the other gave the presidency a shot

Certainly one of the most fortunate Nigerians ever.While I wish you many happy returns,I do hope you'll use the remainder of your years to serve God and humanity closer and deeper

Saharareportersmschewwwwwww
I would value news report coming from a tombo bar far ahead of sahara reporters as far as credibility is concerned.
Buhari may be an unrepentant tyrant and religious bigot,but not a terrorist that organises bomb blasts,Mr President is too informed to make such a gaffe,so OP this is one useless propaganda we can all well see through

Of course we will protect our votes,so nobody will rob GEJ of victory,hmm fair enough

Gbawe:
My friend, when Jonathan , a doomed leader IMO, goes down it will have nothing to do with Tinubu . Wait and see .

ROTFLMAO

LWKMD

UGGML( unu ge gbu madu ley)

Gbawe gbawe,that reminds me of a certain nairalnder that was so vociferous in his(internet) support for Atiku,he used to write then that we should do so so and so that Atiku had already won the primaries and that by the time Atiku becomes president,,,,,,,,infact, no need


Not that I encourage people to count their chicks before the eggs are hatched,but if you must count your chicks in advance,please do well to have an egg-laying hen

In any case I guess Ribadu's "candidacy" only makes the contest more interesting as he would count as one of the also-rans along with the 15 other candidates,as truth be told,the only serious candidates for the presidential election are

1)Mr President;Dr Goodluck Ebele Jonathan
2)Former dictator;Rtd Gen Muhammadu Buhari
3)Kano governor;Malam Ibrahim Shekarau

In descending order of potential for victory at the polls

Gbawe:
You guys and your focus on Tinubu. Well , I cant blame you .

Sharrap and speak the truth for once.Tinubu is the one drawing the focus to himself,no

seanet02:
A vote for Ribadu is a vote for Progress, a vote for Ribadu is a vote for Improved Standard of Living, a vote for Ribadu is a vote for Economic Development, a vote for Ribadu is a vote for Positive Transformation, a vote for Ribadu is a vote for Massive Industrialization, a vote for for Ribadu is a vote for The Banishment of Corruption and Looting, a vote for Ribadu is a vote for Agricultural Revolution. Vote Nuhu Ribadu for 2011 Presidential Elections and Get the Real Dividends of Democracy. He is the change we need. Don't vote for looters in disguise, don't vote for Former Dictators that will make life unbearable for Human Right Oriented People. Vote Nuhu Ribadu for President 2011. The time is now, it is Possible. Nuhu Ribadu for sure.

Riba-who You gotta be kidding me,don't tell me y'all seriously believe Ribadu is serious with this misadventure

I'd rather vote for Kris Okotie

Na today

Which BenueGabriel Suswam's,David Mark's or Barbabas Gemade's ,kai Lagosians are getting increasingly pauperised owing to long-discontinued infrastructural provision even in the face of multiple taxation.Lagos state funds is now being used to ferry touts in truck loads from the South West to other parts of the country to create an impression of mass attendance at rallies.I laugh in Swahili

No wahala,we'll see how the hired crowd will vote in Benue at the same time they should be voting in their respective states

Yes,he is one of Nigeria's past leaders dictators unfortunately