₦airaland Forum

Onegai: Hmm, let's try thinking of this:

You train as a makeup artist. Most in Nigeria aren't well-trained, but pay minimum of N70,000 for bad training. Then buying your products (you have to have foundation to match any complexion, that's a minimum of N12,000 for 8 tubes, and then Mary Kay isn't that good, so to do a good job, you have to buy Black Up which is N10,000 a bottle. There's too much fake Iman on the market sold for N4500 per bottle). Then add in eyeshadows, a palette can be N8500 and that is the crap chinese stuff that irritates. So you spend minimum of N25,000 for more chinese stuff of slightly better quality. False lashes are N800 per packet (the good stuff which isn't heavy on the eye). We won't mention powders, blushes mascara, primers and skincare for all types of skins and complexions. Remember, all these products finish and expire, so they need replacement.
Then transport to the bride's house, first for trial and then for engagement and another day, white wedding, no matter how early or late the time. So that's usually cab fare. Calculate N3000 per trip.
Also, naija brides can waste time, so you can't do 2 weddings in one day. And then you have to wait for their mum, sisters or friends who want free makeup (as if you have products to dash).
You may say "oh well, why should I still pay so much?". Let me ask you this: which do you think you will use to remember your wedding, your menu, your hall venue or your pictures? And if it's pictures, do you wanna look your best in your pictures or do you want to look like your short-sighted sister did your makeup without her glasses? Why pay a photographer N150,000 when you look like a masquerade because you paid your MUA N40,000 for her wahala?
What do you think?

Sorry, erm, are you the makeup artiste the op is complaining about? This one u gave her the load down of makeup history from queen jezebel's era.

About the rude and saucy part, I totally agree. Adding to that, they are always fugly. I dono if them dey vex say the person wey them dey makeup fine pass them.

My boss complained bitterly about one of them the day he wanted to do a fotoshoot for our chef. The camera guy that they weren't paying was just on point behaving himself then the almight MUA was so saucy and rude and fugly.

all na market strategy.. they are just fuc-king with all of us and making alot of money without our knowledge.. Samsung hardwares are used in apple devices.. what kind of so called "enemity" is that?
Ssmsung: apple, how many iphones have you sold this year?

Apple: men "my bro" we sold 8million iphone 5s already. Thanks for that your chip, it worked fine.What about you?

Samsung: Men the s3 did 30million already.

Apple: hmnm, that impressive, but you know we just came out. i am sure by year end we supose dey touch your back too.

Samsung: I belive , any how we are still brother..

Apple: yes i know..Now, can can we make this business so interesting, we have made all the money and we are bored. The new technology doesnt come out until 2nd quarter of nxt yr.

Samsung: Men, thats true, lets sue ourselves around the courts worldwide na.. that would be fun

Apple: brilliant idea, that should keep us busy for the time being..

samsung: Yea it should.

jamp: Money plentyooo. But why can't our govt pay subsidy on dis one.

Football is the only unifying factor in Nigeria and our govt should invest heavily in football.

mumu pay subsidy for you?

Fogman: Hi, thanks for you interest in our device. The device has an inbuilt battery that last up to 200 hours. You only recharge thru your cigar port when needed. Just like u charge ur phone.

I would definitely be contacting you before the week run out. at most nextweek. ITs free delivery within lagos right?

Fogman i am totally interested in this device. i would like to use it in my car. but the thing is i want to know if this device uses a bat3 instead of a chord connected to the lighter socket before you can use it..

[size=20pt]THE DIRT OFF YOUR SHOULDER ACT JUST GOES TO SHOW THAT AMERICANS WOULD PICK SWAG OVER INTELLIGENCE ANY DAY ANYTIME[/size]

lawmani: First comment

[size=20pt]After that what next?[/size]

Redmosquito: Minion: Ur Painfulness! These girls are geniuses, they are so smart
Hades: Shut up young one! Now you see how everybody dey make noise say dem smart die, This takes be back some years ago, when this smart undergraduate Nigerian single-handedly created a coal powered car, every Nigerian huffed and puffed with pride, they showered him with praises and all. Do you know what he is doing now?
Minion: What?
Hades: He is drinking GARRI
Minion: Oh!

Lol minion.I sent you a mail you havent replied. Your posts are totally funny.

vizio: Is shouting (All capitals) the newest thing on Nairaland??

[size=20pt]NO it isnt friend.. I was in my coolest element when i typed this. so am i now typing this. i want them knuckle heads to read it and sink it in quick.[/size]

berem: OK

please you did not have to comment if you don't have words to say. maybe you were hoping it would get to front page and you'l be the "first to comment"

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car or house, YES. but anything apart from that NO. but on second thought why would i buy a car for my girlfriend? Instead i would give her full access to the "supposed" car i bought for her without her knowledge so she doesnt have the thought its hers.

Ndoz: I dey improve 5th




tk it easy bro..

[size=20pt]you guys should stop this position thingy here. its becoming an irritant and only shows how childish people are. Let me lecture you friend. THERE IS NO PRIZE MONEY OR GIFT ITEM IF YOU ARE FIRST. MAKE YOUR POINT AND LEAVE, IF ITS GOOD ENOUGH, YOU GET THE APPROPRIATE LIKES UR COMMENT SHOULD GET.[/size]

eduson55: [size=18pt]they need to burn more and torture those brutal ,inhuman,dispatacutated,enrumbled,enacutalinated,vandalisticalitical police men.
****breathing***[/size]

eh ee. no breathe o. make u see if you fit last 10 more mins. i support your govt tho.

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WHY I VOTED FOR OBAMA
07.11.12 

WHY AND HOW I VOTED FOR OBAMA

I voted for Obama.

I didn’t intend to do so at the beginning, I’ll admit that.

Truth is, I wasn’t concerned with the processes of the US elections. I felt that just because I am a Nigerian- born and bred and living in this here great nation- my duty was simply to hold a passing interest in American politics.

Like every other Nigerian, I thought there was no need to pay the US Elections any attention. I thought it did not concern me.

I was wrong.

It was my neighbor who first enlightened me. I’d walked over to get the pair of gardener’s shears he’d borrowed off me months ago.

“Hello,” He said as soon as he saw me, “Election’s coming soon. Pretty exciting, eh?”

I wasn’t sure what elections these were, or whether they were indeed exciting.

“Why, Obama VS Romney,” he said, answering the question my face had become. “Who are you supporting?”

“Er…” I said. Up till that moment I hadn’t thought about it.

“Hello?” He said, face alight with incredulity, “You’re not supporting Obama?”

“Well”, I said scratching my head, “I suppose I am.”

“Good,” he said, “We need to support him as a people.”

He was staring off into the distance with a far off look in his eyes.

I hazarded a question, “This support you speak of? How do we get it to him? How, for example, do we vote?”

He looked at me like I had the IQ of a rock.

“Via Skype?” I ventured.

He shook his head heavily.

I tried again: “Facebook?”

He sighed heavily.

“Don’t let a little detail like that stop you from supporting him,” he said. “He needs all the support he can get.”

And went inside to put on his generator. The power had been off since morning.

I didn’t get the shears.

………………………………………………..

When I arrived at work the next day my colleagues were having a heated discussion. I wondered what had happened.

“See the debate last night?” One asked.

“Er… Not really” I said.

“Stayed up all night to see it.” He informed me with a superior air.

“I worry for Obama,” said another, “He didn’t put up a good performance.”

“He’s down two points in the polls” Another added. ”Saw that on the news this morning.”

“Democrat or Republican?” One asked me suspiciously.

I cast about wildly for an answer.

“Obama,” I said.

They cheered.

I still didn’t get it, but I began to see how this worked.

It wasn’t easy at first. There was a lot I needed to learn. Like how my precious vote could be given to Obama. I worried about that.

From time to time, I’d be let in on what to do, where to direct my efforts.

“Have you been watching the polls?” A friend would ask, as we drove around hunting for Petrol to purchase.”Obama’s up by 3 per cent.”

I would smile and nod with pleasure.

Or:

“I hope Obama’s stand on foreign policy goes over well with the ‘Undecideds’. This whole election is based on tipping that small population” A colleague would inform me as we waited patiently for the power to come back on.

I would shake my head at the unfairness of it all. Don’t worry. Barrack, I’d mutter through clenched teeth, we’ll get you through this.

Or:

“Obama’s got another state locked down,” A friend would say, after church service.

“Really?” I’d ask.

“Not leaving the White House soon. No sir, we aren’t.” He’d say magnificently before excusing himself. Commercial bikes had been banned, and if he wanted to get home before dark, he had to start the walk home early.

Much of the time, I relied heavily on my neighbor. I’d go over there each evening to get my shears and we’d spend the time watching CNN and going over reports and statistics.

“You have to not let the little details bother you.” He said in answer to my question. “Do what you can. Place #TeamObama at the end of your tweets. Use his photos as your avatars and display pictures. Find something funny to say that makes him look good.”

………………………………………………….

And then, early this morning, I received the news: Obama won! Obama won! I couldn’t believe it!

Everyone’s ecstatic. We’ve had quite the field day changing our BBM statuses and display pictures to reflect the hard earned victory we’d won. I went online and let everyone know how happy I was this had happened. I slapped my neighbor across the back and thought briefly about my shears.

I know some people will ask: “why did you do this? Why did you vote for the man?”

I am here to answer that question.

I can truthfully say that it has something to do with the Undecided’s and the minority and the majority and the polls.

And also with how easy it was to vote. All I had to do was put up a display picture now and then, place #TeamObama at the end of my tweets, and nod sagely while others discussed the politics and stuff.

And the other question: “How did I vote for him?”

Well…

Truth is…

I don’t know.

But I didn’t let a little detail like that stop me.

http://miabaga.com/p/why-i-voted-for-obama/

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[size=30pt]haba Jona... you din't know he was going to win? i am sure the electoral process looks like rocket science to Nigerian Politicians[/size]

SEUN, PLEASE CAN I KNOW IF MY DESIGNS PASSED ALL THE TESTS?

sinetheta: i have very neat tab 2. for just 48k
Come with original usb cable and pounch
4gb memory card included
Sim card slot

Hello man whas ur number and whats the model number of the tab?

is it brand new? reply asap i am waiting

I feel he did not have enough charisma to beat Obama..Americans prefer a person who got swag and less intelligent than a person who is intelligent and got less swag cos truly really, the president is just the supervisory head of the various institutions. The main decisions are made by the house.

seanet01: That is what it is. This is what happens to people who seldom take time out to visit Their Fatherland. They will not be able to realize what is on ground. I know what is happening in Lagos. Everytime i am in ng i make sure i spend at least a week in Lagos. Ibos are constituting a nuisance to the well being of Lagos. 70% of Lagos okada drivers are ibos.

Its clear that wherever you are you are as ignorant as the other poster who with their first comments converted the thread to a tribal lashing event and besides, who asked you where u are and how u plan your routine?

okpara ugo: Are u sharing testimony or you got high on something

i wonder my bro or sister whoever you are.. Men that slot eh, there are just good for nothing really.. and i dont know why ladies fall for their packaging..Their main customers are ladies.. i wonder if when they were starting out they did jazz fr any lady who crosses their domain.. I was begging my sister to chill that i would help her source out a Very brand new Blackberry 9900 phone but no she carried her big head and went to slot to get one and it became faulty in less than 3days and she went back to change it. not only are they good for nothing they are totally expensive and they claim they have warranties on their items but that a big lie. if You buy from them and you go back with a problem even that same day, they would deny you.

nd here is what i think the problem is. they buy cheap phones from dubai and china cos they are relatively cheaper for them because they are also in high demand due to the fact tha Nigerians dont want to pay for quality. they feel its too expensive and they cant afford it. Truly, really, they cant afford it because the economy is bad and these sub standard phones have flooded the market so much that it has overshadowed the original ones. Infact, there is no original product in the market anymore due to china's influx into our market.... Men this my talk is heading somwhere else.. lemme stop here before i enter another topic [size=30pt]USELE-SS PIPU[/size]

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CORRECTED VERSIONs OF MY DESIGNS