₦airaland Forum

maki:
hey people, what da heck is going on here?

cant u read previous post?

cant u all see that they are arguing about ignorance?

did i start an argument with my last post?

Two guys where standing on a street corner
bragging about how each one was smarter. One
finally said, "I'm so smart I can tell if a
woman is wearing panties or not."

The other replied, "Impossiable, nobody is
that smart." A coupple of minutes later a woman
in her thirties walked by. The guy said "there,
she is not wearing any panties."

So the two guys confronted her and said, "We have
a bet going, could you tell us if you are wearing
panties or not."

After a couple of minutes she finally admitted
she was pantiless. After the woman walked off
the guy asked the other guy, "how could you
tell?"

The other guy replied, "Easy, there
was dandruff on her shoes."

The difference between men and women in one
paragraph:

A man is driving up a steep narrow mountain
road. A woman is driving down the same road.

As they pass each other, the woman leans out
the window and yells, "Pig!"

The man immediately leans out the window and
replies, "Bitch!"

They each continue on their way, and as the
man rounds the next corner, he crashes into
a pig in the middle of the road.

There was this couple who had been married for 50
years. They were sitting at the breakfast table
that morning when the old gentleman said to his
wife, "Just think honey, we've been married for
50 years."

"Yeah," she replied, "Fifty years ago this very
day, we were sitting here at this breakfast
table together."

"Hmmm, " the old man said, "We were probably
sitting here naked as jay birds fifty years ago
this morning."

"Well," the old lady snickered, "What do you
say, should we?"

The two stripped to the buff and sat down at
the table. The two sat there for a few minutes,
giggling like teenagers, when the little old
lady breathlessly whispered, "You know, honey,
my nipples are as hot for you as they were fifty
years ago."

"I wouldn't be surprised," replied the old man.
"One's in your coffee and the other one's in your
oatmeal."

It was another Payday and I was tired of being a
Mr. Goodbar. So I saw Miss Hershey standing
behind the Powerhouse on the corner of Clark and
Fifth Avenue, and I whipped out my Whopper and
whispered, "Hey Sweetart, how'd you like to
Krunch on my Big Hunk for a Million Dollar Bar?

Well, she immediately went down on my Tootsie
Roll, and, it was like Pure Almond Joy, I
couldn't help but grab her delicious Mounds
'cause it was easy to see that this little Twix
had the Red Hots. It was all I could do to hold
back a Snicker and a Krackle as my Butterfinger
went up her tight little Kit Kat and she started
to scream "Oh Henry, Oh Henry!"

Soon she was handling my Peter Paul and Zagnuts
and I knew it wouldn't be long before I blew my
Milkduds clear to Mars and gave her a taste of
the old Milky Way. She asked if I was into M&M,
but I said "Hey Chiclet, no kinky stuff." Why
don't you just take my Whatchamacallit and slip
it up you Bit O' Honey?" (What a piece of
Juicyfruit she was too.)

She screamed, "Oh, Crackerjack, you're better
than the Three Musketeers!" as I rammed my Ding
Dong up her Rocky Road and into her Peanut Butter
Cup. Well, I was givin' it to her Good 'n'
Plenty, when all of a sudden, my Starburst.

Yeah, as luck would have it, she started to grow
a bit Chunky and complained of a Wrigley in her
stomach. Sure enough, nine months later, out
popped a Baby Ruth.

i think the boy means jack as in the jack in a pack of joker cards
quite funny

why have i run out of things to say?

this is so original and funny. unlike the ones copied from joke sites
Wtg lexicon . wtg

wicked boy and mumu dad

now that is one hell of a woman

now that was almost true, except for the last one

What did the blonde say when she looked inside
the box of Cheerios?

'Oh look donut seeds'

3 women was in a buliding. They saw cum on the
wall. The brunet goes "ewww is that cum?"

The old lady went "ewww, it is."

Then a blonde comes up licks its and tastes it
and she went "no one from this buliding."

--------------------------------------
A teacher, a petty thief and a lawyer all died and
went to the Pearly Gates.

Because of crowding, St. Peter told them they had
to pass a test before ascending any further.

Adressing The teacher, he asked, "What was the
name of the famous ship that hit an iceburg and
sank?"

"The Titanic," she answered and St. Peter motioned
her into heaven.

The thief was next. "How many people died on that
ship?" St. Peter asked.

"Gee, that's tough," the man replied. "But luckily
I just saw the movie. The answer is 1500."
St. Peter let him through.

Then St. Peter turned to the lawyer.
"Name them."


-----------------------

Dan Quayle, Newt Gingrich, and Bill Clinton are
traveling in a car together in the midwest.

A tornado comes along and whirls them up into the
air and tosses them thousands of yards away.

When they come down and extract themselves from
the vehicle, they realize they're in the land of
Oz. They decide to go to see the Wizard of Oz.

Quayle says, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for a
brain."

Gingrich says, "I'm going to ask the Wizard for a
heart."

Clinton says, "Where's Dorothy?"
----------------------------------------------------------


A woman and a man are involved in a car accident;
it's a bad one. Both of their cars are totally
demolished but amazingly neither of them are
hurt.

After they crawl out of their cars, the woman
says, "So you're a man, that's interesting. I'm
a woman. Wow, just look at our cars! There's
nothing left, but fortunately we are unhurt.
This must be a sign from God that we should
meet and be friends and live together in peace
for the rest of our days."

Flattered, the man replied, "Oh yes, I agree
with you completely!"

"This must be a sign from God!" The woman
continued, "And look at this, here's another
miracle. My car is completely demolished but
this bottle of wine didn't break. Surely God
wants us to drink this wine and celebrate our
good fortune."

Then she hands the bottle to the man, The man
nods his head in agreement, opens it and drinks
half the bottle and then hands it back to the
woman.

The woman takes the bottle, immediately puts
the cap back on, and hands it back to the man.

The man asks, "Aren't you having any?"

The woman replies, "No. I think I'll just wait
for the police, "

A man travels to Spain and goes to a Madrid
restaurant for a late dinner. He orders the house
special and he is brought a plate with potatoes,
corn, and two large meaty objects. "What's this?"
he asks?

"Cojones, senior," the waiter replies.

"What are cojones?" the man asks.

"Cojones," the waiter explains, "are the testicles
of the bull who lost at the arena this afternoon."

At first the man is disgusted; but being the
adventurous type, he decides to try this local
delicacy. To his amazement, it is quite delicious.
In fact, it is so good that he decides to come
back again the next night and order it again.

This time, the waiter brings out the plate, but
the meaty objects are much smaller.

"What's this?" he asks the waiter.
"Cojones, senior," the waiter replies.

"No, no," the man objects, "I had cojones
yesterday and they were much bigger than these."

"Senior," the waiter explains, "the bull does
not always lose."

A teacher was working with a group of children,
trying to broaden their horizons through sensory
perception. She brought in a variety of lifesavor
candies and told the kids to close their eyes and
taste each flavor. The kids easily identified the
taste of cherries, lemons and mint, but when the
teacher gave them honey-flavored lifesavors, they
were all stumped.

"I'll give you a hint," said the teacher, "It's
something your mommy and daddy probably call each
other all the time."

Instantly one of the kids coughed his onto the
floor and shouted, "Quick, spit them out - they're
assholes!"

And what is the meaning of "?"

now for those of you who have misplaced ur funny bones, she wanted the counter to be cleared so that she can get a little jiggy with him, on the counter. the guys browser was bigger that the other two. 'ope u get it now

@ michy, are u not supposed to phrase that post as a question?

@hush,
what makes u think she doesnt need my help? didn't u read previous posts?

Now i read all the previous posts. who and why was my name mentioned?

Rhodalyn:
what do u want them for mr. Unknown Gender??

@rhoda did u notice u called him/her MR. ?
and do i understand that u are feeling Hot? i can be of help u know

ok i am back. now what has been going on since i left?
@blaze, can u proove that with a pic?

@habitat,
the previous pic in ur profile revealed ur face better. why did u remove it?

How will it end when u ar still posting in it?

@adeoba, what is that grin doin in ur post?

Three women, a redhead, a brunette, and a blonde
escaped from prison one day and they ran for
miles until they came upon an old barn.

They climbed into the loft and laid down to rest.
There were three gunny sacks there and the girls
put them on as they heard someone coming.

The sheriff and one of his deputies came into the
barn and his deputy climbed into the hayloft and
reported seeing nothing but three gunny sacks.

The sheriff said "Kick them and see what is in
them."

The deputy kicked the sack with the redhead and
she said "BowWow".

Tne deputy reported that there was a dog in one,
and proceeded to kick the second sack, and heard
"Meow" and reported a cat was in it.

He then kicked the last sack and nothing
happened, he kicked again and the blonde said
"Potatoes"

@ ciarelove thanks. shoutouts to u too

did y'all notice that the first 9 replies were by females|?

i'll bet y'all that they will end