₦airaland Forum

CYBERWEAVER:
I am currently planning to get married. I’ve been with my babe for about a year now.

After several consultations, we agreed on a wedding budget of about 3 million Naira.

But I keep asking myself one very honest question: how do I commit that kind of money to someone who hasn’t really shown the same level of effort back, even in something as small as 5k, despite earning a little?


Asin, I never smell her 5k since we started dating.


At this point, it’s not even about the money anymore. It’s about intention, balance, and simple acts of kindness.

Even on my birthday, I didn’t receive a gift from her, and that stayed with me more than I expected.

I’ve never had to deliberately test her money, because genuine care and small acts of giving usually show themselves naturally over time.

To be clear, I’ve been carrying most of the financial weight in this relationship, and there’s hardly anything tangible she has ever done for herself without at least my 50% contribution since we met.

I don’t complain, but I also don’t want to ignore what I’m seeing.

As a responsible man, I’m trying to be honest with myself before I take a step I can’t easily undo.

So I want to ask people who are married or have real experience: if I go ahead and marry in a relationship where this is the current dynamic, what should I realistically expect in marriage?

I’m not trying to assume the worst, but I also believe experience speaks louder than hope.

If she is earning her own money, and you handle q00% of the bills at home, then she should be 100% loyal to you, as Africans. But if she is still dragging "man of the house" position at home, then you need to sit her down and talk. But if the love you have for her is not up 80%, bro look for a woman that will call you lord.

"When political actors realise they can shop for favourable judgments, the courts become battlegrounds rather than temples of justice. That is dangerous for democracy,” he added.

Who is this one saying this? Doesn't he know that is what it is alread? Or does he live in another country?

His charms didn't save him?

TOPCRUISE:
A lesson to all pastors wives. Don't think because you are called mummy pastor or Pastor Mrs, some married women in your church are not thinking of snatching your god fearing husband and planning to destroy your marriage and kids.

She snatched her husband in 2015. The wife did not shout or report how she did it. It was when the husband snatcher proceeded in destroying her son in 2026 by sending him to jail and accusing him of kidnap that she shout HELP.

I smiled at the bolded. Is the pastor born-again? Some of them just have that as a profession, or side hussle, nothing more, they still their fleshly and lustful lifestyle, even inside the church.

The most confusing part is the fornicator's husband was not mentioned, I thought she was married.

God1000:
Who cares about going there anyway, I will never set my foot in that terrible country
I pity some N@gerians that are worshipping these useless racists

Which country would you rather move to if you wish to leave Nigeria? wth condition that Nigeria doesn't work

EmptyGarden:
IKEBE SUPER!
You’d find the likes of Nakson and Pa Jimo here.

I think Nackson was his nickname, his main name was Dauda. Hahahahahaha. I was in JS2 or JS3 when I started reading Ikebe super, one of our friends sneaks it into class and we pass it round , only clique members. Ikebe super was born, simple.

Are the two pilots still at large?

fredoooooo:
African leaders time to stand up and man up for once in your life

Do they have the balls to do so? They only care about their pockets to amass wealth that will make their descendants live like they currently live, not caring about any other person. African leaders are a curse to Africa

Quarterpast:
Haven't eaten since yesterday except garri

I slumped at work yesterday.

This is the major reason I prefer death to life right now. Nigeria has completely wrecked me.
And if you call for help, Nobody will even answer u.
Some will read your message and ignore you. Some will politely decline to help, others will mock u.

Where is humanity in all these?
Humanity is gone

You even have work to.slump. Is not not faithful?

Na lie!

SonOfWords:
Of all the comments before mine, it's abundantly obvious that nigerians are more emotional than intellectual.

Wale Adenuga is a m*d and exploitative man and that's all I'm going to say.

If you ever start your own company, then you may, may, understand certain things.

One thing in business is, each party tries to get the best out of the deal. But once there is an agreement between two adults, then it is no exploitation.
If you allow the payee, he will want to be paid 50-100% of the revenue generated from the deal, without caring if the payer has any other costs to take care of.
On the other hand, if you allow the payer, he will want to use the payer without paying a dime, maybe just offer enough food to have energy to execute the deal.

But as adults, once you put the ink on paper, it means the benefits thereof is enough to handle your immediate and near future needs, and there is nothing bad there, so long as no one is being coerced.

Note: AGREEMENT IS AGREEMENT.

HacheNoire:
Ayodele should focus on winning souls for JC Penny! That’s his primary objective!

If he is so interested in politics, he should decamp from the church to ADC. That a perfect hospice home that fits his age.

Abeg what does the scammer have to do with JC Penny? Are you asking him to resign from church? Don't you know he is a member of APC, and a tribal bigot?

She better run to MFM to beg for forgiveness, if they are truly born-again, they will forgive her. Then she should borrow money from the bank and pay the punitive fine of 50,000

esnbrutality:
Chai...!!!

Nairalanders will not kee pesin

I bet you didn't even read through that original post, you would have seen where it was mentioned. He used to travel to London for treatment.

esnbrutality:
Chai!!!!...

Impotent leader

Imagine, a leader that is afraid of showing his face in public.

Anyway, his propaganda network will soon tell us that he is fearless and fighting USA and Israel from his bunker.

Bloody coward.

You know he is impotent for real. As in, he cannot impregnate a woman. That is one of his medical challenges all along.

MrsAyomide:
Real leadership will choose peace and reform, but no, Iran supporters in Nigeria who are not sure of their next meal are here cheering Iran to their doom..

Their latest line of defence now is that they are “Martyrs”

lol. Funny people

They are even bold to say Iran suppots Shiite teeerorists, who are good terrorrrists, that can be used to drive away sunni terrorrists in Nigeria. Even if such is true, they empty heads fails to understand that all terrorrrists deserve only one place, hell.

funkmrflexx:
I've been married for 3 years now with 2 kids, I try my best to take care of my family but the economy has become very bad so it's no longer possible to take care of a family of 4 on just 1 income.
When I had money, I setup a business for my wife because I want her to be engaged and also she can support with whatever she has from the business, but after a year the business crumbled with no results to show (she gave many excuses on why she can't continue the business), even after that I've tried engaging her on other endeavors but she's not always serious.

Now she does nothing, she just presses phone and play games all day long, all the responsibilities are on me, basically everything from school fees, feeding, house rent to buying a cube of Maggi.

I've tried talking to her several times but she will pretend to be serious and goes back to default settings, I'm tired and its really talking a tole on me, sometimes I just get angry at her for no reason and I don't even want to come home.

It's not the fact the she's staying home that's the issue, its the fact the she's not showing any effort to try and do something. I'm tired because all the money I make is being used for feeding and running the house, I can't even save or even think about buying properties

Get her a job, even if it is a cleaning job.

Throwback:
What is the correlation between election and the fact that a corper was abducted by terrorists?

What political party would have stopped terrorism that the past PDP and the cirrent APC in government have not stopped since 2010 when all this mess began?

Would election stop the ethnoreligious persuasions that feed the inclination towards a life of terrorism?

Haba, this your question no follow o. There is a strong correlation, the coefficient is almost 1.0

HenryStarlife:
It’s sad these people think they are fighting for their country

IRCG abi? Don't ,imd them, they really destroyed the good people of Iran.

The dead terrrorists son has been named, let's see his approach and how long he will last. Majority of Iranian, especially those in diaspora, want IRCG out completely, they are routing for Reza Pahlavi for a democratic transition.

muyico:
Fake news 🗞️ always
Not real

It's not fake, it is true. In fact, there is a current situation where all the clerics gathered to vote a new Supreme leader, they have finished voting, and were counting the votes. They were struck and all eliminated

That man looks 45 man.

The cost of war? Or cheap blackmail?

No qualms here. If they return you, Nigerian Iran (k1dnappers. bandits, teeerrorists, Boko haram, lakurawa, fulani men, yahoo boys, etc) will do the same thing Iran planned to do to you there, Better remain there and just move to another section where Iran's hands cannot reach

But they are spending it wisely.

Parachoko:
Nah you do the counting?

Official data is about 36,000. But I have Iranian friends who tell me the actual number is over 100,000. Remember, Ayatollah turned off internet so information doesn't go out. Tousi tv also has a reporter there who uses starlink. Bro, if you have an Iranian abroad, you would know how evil the regime is and how badly they want them to leave.

Parachoko:
When Trump was campaigning, he told the American people there will be no new war under his watch. The middle east is now burning because of his foolish action

This is not war, USA/Israel are simply delivering the Iranian people., over 36,000 have been killed

madridguy:
He will get another home later. The most important thing is that he is alive to witness the downfall of the aggressors.

Long life Ali Khamenei.

I hope so.

The problem Nigeria has is that it glories in increments compared to its past, not actual successes.

I mean, yesterday it was one, if we can get to two, then we are better than the 'past administration'. They don't really care to ask if that two is enough for the people. It's a shame.