Lol

"LoL

mydex93:
419 pipu

am not 419 my dear. Am legit. Been writing for artistes for some time now

Read Naija Sex Stories here www.86wiz.com

The major reasons why so many artistes fail to
blow is not that
they are not good or sound. They just find it hard
to make that
hit that will hit their audience. As an artiste, you
have to
understand the catchy phrase and good lyrics to
capture the
attention of your listeners, coupled with good
composure and
melodies
At NAIJA SONG WRITERS, we will assist you in
composing
the hit song you have always desired and with the
assurance of
more than 80% acceptance among your audience.
Try us today, our services are so affordable and
with continuos
support on your music promotion.
Call 08038606260 07051114521
Or Facebook www./sonya.blaze2

Hello, fam.
Today, we’re going to mess around with Nigerian
hip hop. You know, I used to be one of those so
called ‘hip hop heads.’ If it wasn’t Methodman,
Redman, Scarface, Rakim, Pac , Biggie,Big Pun,
S laughterhouse or some underground rapper that
98% of the population didn’t know, I wasn’t
bumping it. We were the hard kids in baggies
dissing the skinny jeans kids.


Then with the
emergence of rappers like Modenine, M.I and the
Terry tha Rapman, I decided to give Nigerian hip
hop a chance. I remember hearing Modenine’s
‘Pentium IX’, my mind was blown. I remember
staying up all night to hear M.I’s ‘Talk About It’
over and over again.


More so, as I grew older, I realized that music is
essentially about the melody. So any musician
that could make me nod my head and move my
feet is cool with me. All those hard rappers
talking about how they kill people and smoke all
day have no claim on me no more. Don’t get me
wrong, I still appreciate talent. I still invest my
data more on conscious and underground music
than the mainstream ones. I’m just not as stiff as I
used to be. No more forcing myself to hate an
artiste just ‘cause he has lots of fans. poo, I’m into


Wizkid now and I think Solid Star is probably
Nigeria’s most underrated artiste.
I enjoyed my relationship with Nigerian hip hop
for a while. Then the money started coming and
they started running out of Ideas. Witty
punchlines were replaced by watery ones. When
you try and raise this, the rappers will call you a
hater who’s just hating on their success, like Mr
Incredible said in his latest single, ‘Chairman,’
“have you eaten today? Then why are you hating?”


This piece is just to let them know that
we the fans are disappointed in them for putting
in far less time thinking of intelligent punchlines
than they do drafting lists of rich men to praise in
their next single (refer to M.I’s ‘Chairman’ and
Iceprince’s ‘Northerner’). Ladies and gentlemen,
Nigerian hip hop is the
new Fuji.


If your favourite rapper is herE, please don’t be
mad at me. I’m not saying they’re wack, i’m just
saying that particular line is. And if you feel these
aren’t wack, please forgive me, I have high
standards. If you feel you have heard wacker
punchlines, feel free to use the comment section.



10. “Life is not fair, I’m thinking of how to bleach”
– ICEPRINCE, NIGERIAN BET CYPHER, VARIOUS
ARTISTES
The amazing thing is that people actually think this
is clever. Like what the Bleep does this even
mean? How does your bleaching help life get fair?
This looks like something I would have written at
age ten when my now rested dream of being a
rapper was just conceived, definitely not what
you want to put on BET cypher where ‘killers’ like
Modenine and X.O Senavoe will be on. Yeah,
everybody loves Iceprince but it’s not because of
his clever lyrics, it’s because he comes out with
monster hit songs……… once in three years.



9.“You leave me messed up, now I’m feeling like
a fart” – VECTOR, ‘TICKLE ME’ ft Chuddy K We all
love Vector. Nigga has mad tracks under
his belt. Raise your hands if you still bump ‘Get
Down’. The Bar-Rack mixtape had its highs and
lows. It boasts of ‘Stay Scheming’ ‘Intro’ and
‘Tuwo’. But most of the tracks were just fillers. I
think he’s trying too hard with the metaphors. I
blame the people around him who tell him “men,
that poo is drugs!”
Like really?! Messed up and feeling like a fart?
Apart from the fact that it’s generic, it’s plain silly.
We love you Vector, but not all tracks should be
released.


8.“I really wish we last long, Anaconda.”
ICEPRINCE, ‘MORE’
Here is our beloved Iceprince again. I find it
difficult commenting on this one because the
stupidity speaks for itself. Dude, you don’t have
to come up with corny Bottom punchlines like this
just because you want to rhyme. Truth is, this
whole list could have been made of bad lines
from this song alone, but I’ll just use this one as a
point of contact. Brother Iceprince should have
just written a love letter to the babe jeje instead of
infesting our airwaves with this song.


7. “ I’m so
fly, my plane never lands. Like Michael
Jackson’s park, Neverland” – PHENOM, ‘OMO
NAIJA’
I actually love the ‘Omo Naija’ track, mostly
because of its infectious hook. Maybe I’m just
hating on this line because I expected more from
Phenom.
First of all, ‘i’m so fly, my plane never lands’ was
wack, then dude had to go on and explain
‘Never land’ to us. Who the Bleep did you make
the track for, five year olds? If this was a
freestyle , I wouldn’t mind but I’m sure this was
written, and so he must have been pretty
impressed with the line for him to release it.
Let me kick a rhyme for Phenom.
Dear Phenom, this is sad,
Like Michael Jackson’s death, sad.



6. “Na jollof music, no be rice and stew” – LYNXXX,
‘EZIOKWU’ Ft Various Artistes.
I poo you not, brethren, Lynxxx actually said
that.
I think he should join Nollywood. His nice
physique will be a welcome replacement for the
pot bellied, mid-fourties lead actors we have.
Because, truth is he’s bleeping up the music
industry and his looks is the only thing giving
him any sort of buzz. The nigga has never
impressed, either intentionally or otherwise.
Some might say he was just having fun but I say
this is lazy writing. If you want to get away with
lines likes like this, make highlife music.
With lines like this, little wonder there’s nobody
looking out for any new Lynxxx music.



5. “IF YOU’RE SLEEPING ON ME, IT MUST BE
UNDER-
COVER/ GET IT?”- X.O SENAVOE-TAXI MUSIC
The only thing worse than this punchline is the fact
that X.O actually had the nerve to repeat the
line then asked “get it”?! What in the actual
Bleep?
This line is TOO BASIC to even repeat or even ask
us if we get it!
Music lovers are not retards,STOP asking us if we
get silly and corny lines!
He just had to mess up an otherwise good track
with a line like this…..please,no more punchlines
that sound like you’re rapping for an autistic
audience.



4. “LIKE A CALENDAR, I’VE GOT DATES”- PHYNO
FT OLAMIDE. – GHOST MODE
Wait…wait…wait, can you feel your brain cells
dying already?? Fam, this here is just a shame,
let’s work with this punchline and provide phyno
with more punchlines…
“Like a toolbox, I’ve got tools” (._.) Oga Sarz,oya
gimme one mad beat, I’ve arrived!
Bonus dead punchline by phyno- “my beat is the
killer-serial” WTF ??


3) “I’M MILK IN THE GAME,
NO TEA HOMIE”- ICE
PRINCE, JUJU
And its a hattrick for the rapper everyone loves!
I’m starting to suspect Iceprince is dating a
kindergaten chick….nothing else can explain
these kind of sappy lines. Please call the
pallbearers…there’s a deadline
here waiting to be buried. Iceprince is really great
at outdoing himself…
If you still have a brain at this point, I
congratulate you,proceed to the last two lines
with utmost caution…


2) “THESE NIGGERS SPASTIC
RHYME, MIKE TYSON”-
REMINISCE, OMO NAIJA REMIX
I’ve played this line like 50million times and it still
makes absolutely no sense.
So,I’ve been forced to conclude that in the
struggle to rhyme, Reminisce just coined one of the
stupidest punchlines ever.
To be fair to be him,he seemed to be totally out of
depth throughout the song…still, its unfair to pry
our ears with totally senseless poo cos you
wanna prove you can spit punchlines in English.


1) “WHEN YOU HEAR TO-TO, TONTO DIKE”-
ERIGGA FT OLAMIDE, PAPER BOI
I swear to God I didn’t make this up…a Nigerian
rapper actually said this!! Wait let’s play this
again….
“When you hear to-to, toto dike”
Fam,are you still waiting for a punchline deader
than this?
His name’s Erigga, Mr. “The gbana wey I dey
smoke big pass ur fan base” (._.)
Y’all better get out of here while you still have
brain cells….
And if you’ve got punchlines deader than these,
feel free to drop a comment….

Read Erotic Stories here www.86wiz.com

OkikiOluwa1:

Its too big to swallow.

choke on it

reaky:
Am surprised you just found out

No info Is lost, the fact that I knew about it for so long or that u knew doesn't mean everyone knows...Swallow ur Pride

OkikiOluwa1:
The Op is a JJC.
Last Bullet
Its been long

No info Is lost, the fact that I knew about it for so long or that u knew doesn't mean everyone knows...Swallow ur Pride

These are police cars? Who do they arrest these with

That's even if I get married. Were the bride dey...u mean all these skelewu wey full town now. I was at a girls place last week and wanted to f**k, but there was no condom, she said she had Gold circle, which I don't use. We never did the thing. Was @her place yesterdday and asked abt the condom, she had used it. And she has her boyfriend in South Africa, where he's been planning wedding with her next year. Am okay just on my own...Abeg Read Naija Sex Story Here www.86wiz.com

1st Storey Building in Nigeria

anonimi:


I believe that the house in the OP is Bishop Ajayi Crowther's house in Badagry, reputed to be the 1st storey building in Nigeria.

I don't argue with Nigerians...this is the 1st Storey building in Nigeria. Peace

This is the picture of the house where the treaty of the amalgamation of the Southern and Northern protectotate of Nigeria was signed

Naija Sex Stories Here www.86wiz.com

The major reasons why so many artistes fail to blow is not that
they are not good or sound. They just find it hard to make that
hit that will hit their audience. As an artiste, you have to
understand the catchy phrase and good lyrics to capture the
attention of your listeners, coupled with good composure and
melodies
At NAIJA SONG WRITERS, we will assist you in composing
the hit song you have always desired and with the assurance of
more than 80% acceptance among your audience.
Try us today, our services are so affordable and with continuos
support on your music promotion.
Call 08038606260 07051114521
Or Facebook www./sonya.blaze2

What plans do you have Man?

Governor Ibikunle Amosun has been so outstanding among most South West governors and the people have so much benefittedd from the works of his administration.

We have compile all his achievements in the past 4years in this compendium, which we are yet to produce due to Financial constraints,

We hereby call for Sponsors to help push this book out as it will go a long way in sensitizing the people about the good works of Governor Ibikunle Amosun of Ogun State.

masterpower:
You still do the thing unprotected?
I don't know that STD's still exist. Very suprise to hear this.

What has associated the post with mine person...Nigerians!!! Nothing to say about that.

Match Finished
Match ends, Chelsea 3, Aston Villa 0.
90'+4'
Full Time
Second Half ends, Chelsea 3, Aston Villa 0.
90'+3'
Attempt missed. Willian (Chelsea) right footed
shot from outside the box is high and wide to
the right. Assisted by André Schürrle.
88'
Nemanja Matic (Chelsea) wins a free kick in the
defensive half.
88'
Foul by Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa).
86'
Offside, Chelsea. Cesc Fàbregas tries a through
ball, but Loïc Remy is caught offside.
86'
Attempt blocked. André Schürrle (Chelsea) right
footed shot from outside the box is blocked.
Assisted by Willian.
83'
Foul by Gary Cahill (Chelsea).
83'
Philippe Senderos (Aston Villa) wins a free kick
in the defensive half.
83'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Alan Hutton.
83'
Attempt blocked. André Schürrle (Chelsea) right
footed shot from the left side of the box is
blocked. Assisted by Willian.
81'
Substitution
Substitution, Chelsea. Loïc Remy replaces Diego
Costa.
79'
GOAL!
Goal! Chelsea 3, Aston Villa 0. Willian (Chelsea)
right footed shot from very close range to the
bottom right corner.
79'
Attempt saved. Diego Costa (Chelsea) right
footed shot from the centre of the box is saved
in the centre of the goal. Assisted by Cesc
Fàbregas.
78'
Nemanja Matic (Chelsea) wins a free kick in the
defensive half.
78'
Foul by Charles N'Zogbia (Aston Villa).
77'
Substitution
Substitution, Chelsea. John Obi Mikel replaces
Oscar.
76'
Offside, Chelsea. Cesc Fàbregas tries a through
ball, but Nemanja Matic is caught offside.
75'
Diego Costa (Chelsea) wins a free kick in the
attacking half.
75'
Foul by Nathan Baker (Aston Villa).
74'
Foul by Nemanja Matic (Chelsea).
74'
Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa) wins a free
kick on the right wing.
72'
Offside, Chelsea. Nemanja Matic tries a through
ball, but Diego Costa is caught offside.
69'
Attempt saved. Alan Hutton (Aston Villa) right
footed shot from outside the box is saved in the
bottom right corner. Assisted by Ashley
Westwood.
69'
Substitution
Substitution, Aston Villa. Charles N'Zogbia
replaces Andreas Weimann.
69'
Substitution
Substitution, Aston Villa. Darren Bent replaces
Kieran Richardson.
68'
Substitution
Substitution, Chelsea. André Schürrle replaces
Eden Hazard.
65'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Philippe Senderos.
65'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Andreas
Weimann.
63'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Aly Cissokho.
63'
Attempt blocked. Oscar (Chelsea) right footed
shot from the centre of the box is blocked.
62'
Booking
Philippe Senderos (Aston Villa) is shown the
yellow card for a bad foul.
61'
Diego Costa (Chelsea) wins a free kick on the left
wing.
61'
Foul by Philippe Senderos (Aston Villa).
60'
Foul by Cesc Fàbregas (Chelsea).
60'
Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa) wins a free
kick in the attacking half.
59'
GOAL!
Goal! Chelsea 2, Aston Villa 0. Diego Costa
(Chelsea) header from the centre of the box to
the high centre of the goal. Assisted by César
Azpilicueta with a cross.
58'
Booking
Cesc Fàbregas (Chelsea) is shown the yellow
card for a bad foul.
58'
Foul by Cesc Fàbregas (Chelsea).
58'
Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa) wins a free
kick in the attacking half.
57'
Foul by Nemanja Matic (Chelsea).
57'
Fabian Delph (Aston Villa) wins a free kick in the
defensive half.
56'
Attempt saved. Diego Costa (Chelsea) header
from the centre of the box is saved in the bottom
left corner. Assisted by Branislav Ivanovic with
a cross.
56'
Attempt missed. Nathan Baker (Aston Villa)
header from the centre of the box is just a bit
too high. Assisted by Ashley Westwood with a
cross following a set piece situation.
55'
Foul by Oscar (Chelsea).
55'
Tom Cleverley (Aston Villa) wins a free kick on
the right wing.
54'
Corner, Aston Villa. Conceded by César
Azpilicueta.
51'
Booking
Tom Cleverley (Aston Villa) is shown the yellow
card for a bad foul.45'+3'
Half Time
First Half ends, Chelsea 1, Aston Villa 0.
45'+2'
Fabian Delph (Aston Villa) wins a free kick in the
defensive half.
45'+2'
Foul by Eden Hazard (Chelsea).
45'+1'
Attempt missed. Willian (Chelsea) left footed
shot from outside the box misses to the left.
Assisted by Diego Costa.
42'
Attempt missed. Willian (Chelsea) right footed
shot from outside the box is high and wide to
the right. Assisted by Oscar.
42'
Attempt missed. Fabian Delph (Aston Villa) left
footed shot from outside the box is high and
wide to the left. Assisted by Tom Cleverley.
41'
Attempt blocked. Fabian Delph (Aston Villa)
right footed shot from outside the box is
blocked.
41'
Attempt blocked. Andreas Weimann (Aston
Villa) right footed shot from outside the box is
blocked. Assisted by Tom Cleverley.
40'
Foul by Nemanja Matic (Chelsea).
40'
Kieran Richardson (Aston Villa) wins a free kick
in the defensive half.
39'
Offside, Chelsea. Branislav Ivanovic tries a
through ball, but Diego Costa is caught offside.
38'
Attempt missed. Diego Costa (Chelsea) right
footed shot from outside the box is close, but
misses the top right corner. Assisted by Oscar.
36'
Attempt missed. Branislav Ivanovic (Chelsea)
header from the centre of the box is too high.
Assisted by Cesc Fàbregas with a cross following
a corner.
35'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Nathan Baker.
35'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Tom Cleverley.
34'
Attempt saved. Diego Costa (Chelsea) header
from the centre of the box is saved in the bottom
left corner. Assisted by Willian with a cross.
31'
Attempt missed. Cesc Fàbregas (Chelsea) right
footed shot from outside the box is close, but
misses to the left. Assisted by Oscar.
26'
Booking
Gary Cahill (Chelsea) is shown the yellow card
for a bad foul.
26'
Foul by Gary Cahill (Chelsea).
26'
Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa) wins a free
kick in the attacking half.
25'
Attempt blocked. Cesc Fàbregas (Chelsea) right
footed shot from outside the box is blocked.
Assisted by César Azpilicueta.
24'
César Azpilicueta (Chelsea) wins a free kick on
the left wing.
24'
Foul by Kieran Richardson (Aston Villa).
22'
Foul by César Azpilicueta (Chelsea).
22'
Tom Cleverley (Aston Villa) wins a free kick in
the defensive half.
20'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Aly Cissokho.
19'
Attempt missed. Aly Cissokho (Aston Villa) right
footed shot from the centre of the box misses to
the left following a corner.
19'
Corner, Aston Villa. Conceded by Eden Hazard.
15'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Nathan Baker.
11'
Delay over. They are ready to continue.
10'
Delay in match Branislav Ivanovic (Chelsea)
because of an injury.
10'
Delay in match Nathan Baker (Aston Villa)
because of an injury.
9'
Andreas Weimann (Aston Villa) wins a free kick
in the attacking half.
9'
Foul by Oscar (Chelsea).
7'
GOAL!
Goal! Chelsea 1, Aston Villa 0. Oscar (Chelsea)
right footed shot from the centre of the box to
the bottom left corner. Assisted by Willian.
7'
Attempt saved. Willian (Chelsea) right footed
shot from a difficult angle on the right is saved
in the bottom right corner. Assisted by Branislav
Ivanovic.
3'
Diego Costa (Chelsea) wins a free kick in the
attacking half.
3'
Foul by Philippe Senderos (Aston Villa).
3'
John Terry (Chelsea) wins a free kick on the left
wing.
3'
Foul by Gabriel Agbonlahor (Aston Villa).
1'
Corner, Chelsea. Conceded by Aly Cissokho.
Kick Off

.

Would gonorrhea also ne considered as the UTI.

tit: APC people can never be honest.
How can you kill somebody and then lie about it?

So you kill someone and tell the whole world u did it? SMH