₦airaland Forum

Chimaritoponcho: uhhhhm...not like i dont know eiffel tower jus dat i wanted to be certain if it was the particular one i was thinkingp#blv#

Oops, I'm sorry. My bad! I was referring to the one in Minsk.

aManFromMars: LOL/

Mate, I'm actually having a great time here. LoL indeed!

Delafruita: you missed the burj al khalifah

Lol. It was delibrate. The guy didn't even know Eiffel Tower. We give up!

Well, about Eiffel Tower? ' I'm feeling lucky'. LoL

Chimaritoponcho: sacred book? What sacred book are u talking about?

Dang! You just nailed it.

Nah. Our languages come from the Empire State Building or the Eiffel Tower. I'm very sure. You can't convince me otherwise because I read it in my sacred book.

Where is the OP now? He's causing confusion here. Pls can you guys remind me where Baal, Zeus, Ogun, Anu etc came from? Oh! I forgot Kal El and Jor El.

How dare you doubt the tale? Do you want to burn in fire forever? Haven't you heard about the talking serpent, the loquacious donkey, the fiery flying chariot, the stationary sun (omg!), the walking dead bodies in Jerusalem after ressurection, the lady that turned to a pillar of salt, all livestocks that died over and over again (at least 3 times) in Egypt and the monstrous FSM? Beware my friend. Our God is a very terrible god. (p.s. He said it himself)

Like Mynd_44 wrote, try to always specify d god you are talking about. In religion, we have several gods and they are from different places. So, which one are you talking about?

I think this place is becoming a joke. This a public forum for f**k's sake. First, it was word censor, I mean what's 'molestion' or 'unclad'. I go to news sites, they say it as it is! Now, if you air your views, you get a hidden post or a ban! In yuzedo's voice . . . . We Give Up! (note: I might get a ban for this)

Twinmama: Then Harry should be promoted to the position of the principal

I tell ya. The principal get bad mind tho'

A first-grade teacher, Ms Brooks, was having trouble with one of her students. The teacher asked, "Harry, what's your problem?"
Harry answered, "I'm too smart for the 1st grade. My sister is in the 3rd grade and I'm smarter than she is! I think I should be in the 3rd grade too!"
Ms. Brooks had enough. She took Harry to the principal's office.
While Harry waited in the outer office, the teacher explained to the principal what the situation was. The principal told Ms. Brooks he would give the boy a test. If he failed to answer any of his questions he was to go back to the 1st grade and behave. She agreed.
Harry was brought in and the conditions were explained to him and he agreed to take the test.
Principal: "What is 3 x 3?"
Harry: "9."
Principal: "What is 6 x 6?"
Harry: "36."
And so it went with every question the principal thought a 3rd grader should know.
The principal looks at Ms. Brooks and tells her, "I think Harry can go to the 3rdgrade."
Ms. Brooks says to the principal, "Let me ask him some questions."
The principal and Harry both agreed.
Ms. Brooks asks, "What does a cow have four of that I have only two of?"
Harry, after a moment: "Legs."
Ms Brooks: "What is in your pants that you have but I do not have?"
The principal wondered why would she ask such a question!
Harry replied: "Pockets."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a dog do that a man steps into?"
Harry: "Pants."
The principal sat forward with his mouth hanging open.
Ms. Brooks: "What goes in hard and pink then comes out soft and sticky?"
The principal's eyes opened really wide and before he could stop the answer, Harry replied, "Bubble gum."
Ms. Brooks: "What does a man do standing up, a woman does sitting down and a dog does on three legs?"
Harry: "Shake hands."
The principal was trembling.
Ms. Brooks: "What word starts with an 'F' and ends in 'K' that means a lot of heat and excitement?"
Harry: "Firetruck."
The principal breathed a sigh of relief and told the teacher, "Put Harry in the fifth-grade, I got the last six questions wrong...

[quote author=mama-gee][color=deeppink]Nairalanders can be so literally minded sometimes....

I was only having a light day. . .

You all need to read between the lines, there was nothing serious about it...

Funny how unserious threads get the most replies but serious ones don't get up to 7 replies.[/color][/quote]Most people just don't have the capacity to either spot a joke or a TROLL
We can't be serious all the time. Life'll be toooooo boring mehn.

Waiting ....

[quote author=mama-gee][color=deeppink]I don't know why but my sister's husband's privates always smells, I can tell from his face that it stinks...

Please how do I tell my sister that she needs to divorce him because of this?[/color][/quote]Hahahaha......dis gave me a good laugh. Op, U r one of d dumbest trolls on NL.

Either we boil a kid in its mother's milk or not? Just passing....sorry! Essential or not?

jayriginal: What religion?

You misunderstood my post. Read again.

Oops, my bad!. You are right mate.

jayriginal: I believe in a deity because of a book written by the deity telling me to believe in the deity.

Written by the deity? This shows how much you know about your religion and its history.

Billyonaire: Number 14 is wrong! I have spent exactly 14 days without sleep, but the 15th night, I had to check into hotel and spent 2 weeks without stepping out of the door to enable me sleep, it worked and I survived, would have done me in.

Tell me something I don't know!

1. Tongue Print
Don't stick out your tongue if you want to hide your identity.
Similar to fingerprints, everyone also has a unique tongue print!

2. Shedding
Your pet isn't the only one in the house with a shedding problem. Humans shed about 600,000 particles of skin every hour. That works out to about 0.68kg each year, so the average person will lose around 47kg of skin by age 70.

3. Bone Count
An adult has fewer bones than a baby. We start off life with 350 bones, but because bones fuse together during growth, we end up with only 206 as adults.

4. New Stomach
Did you know that you get a new stomach lining every three to four days? If you didn't, the strong acids your stomach uses to digest food would also digest your stomach.

5. Scent Remembering
Your nose is not as sensitive as dogs', but it can remember 50,000 different scents!

6. Long Intestines
The small intestine is about four times as long as the average adult is tall. If it weren't looped back and forth upon itself, its length of 18 to 23 feet wouldn't fit into the abdominal cavity, making things rather messy.

7. Bacteria
This will really make your skin crawl: Every square inch of skin on the human body has about 32 million bacteria on it, but fortunately, the vast majority of them are harmless.

8. Source of Body Odour
Th­e source of smelly feet, like smelly armpits, is ­sweat. And people sweat buckets from their feet. A pair of feet have 500,000 sweat glands and can produce around half a litre of sweat a day.

9. Sneeze Speed
The air from a human sneeze can travel at speeds of 160 kilometers per hour or more -- another good reason to cover your nose and mouth when you sneeze -- or duck when you hear one coming your way.

10. Blood Distance
Blood has a long road to travel: Laid end to end, there are about 96,000km of blood vessels in the human body. And the hard-working heart pumps about 7,570 litres of blood through those vessels every day.

11. Saliva Quantity
You may not want to swim in your spit, but if you saved it all up, you could. In a lifetime, the average person produces about 24,000 litres of saliva -- enough to fill two swimming pools!

12. Nail Growth
If you're cli­pping your fingernails more often than your toenails, that's only natural. The nails that get the most exposure and are used most frequently grow the fastest. Fingernails grow fastest on the hand that you write with and on the longest fingers. On average, nails grow about one-tenth of an inch each month.

13. Head Weight
No wonder babies have such a hard time holding up their heads: The human head is one-quarter of our total length at birth but only one-eighth of our total length by the time we reach adulthood.

14. Need for Sleep
If you say that you're dying to get a good night's sleep, you could mean that literally. You can go without eating for weeks without succumbing, but eleven days is tops for going without sleep. After eleven days, you'll be asleep -- FOREVER!

http://health.howstuffworks.com/human-body/parts/16-unusual-facts-about-the-human-body.htm

You have any proof of the existence of a creator you wanna show dem atheists?

Yeah, I understand !!! But I don't give a .......

why? That's the reason the title indicated a SATIRE!

1. You can prove you have a beer

2. There are laws saying beer labels can't lie to you

3. You don't have to wait 2000+ years for another beer

4. Nobody's ever been burned, hanged or tortured over his brand of beer

5. When you have a beer, you don't knock on people's doors trying to give it away

6. They don't force beer on minors, who can't think for themselves

7. No beer has ever caused a major war

8. Beer doesn't tell you how to have s-e-x

9. No one will kill you for not drinking beer

10. If you've devoted your life to beer, there are groups to help you stop.

If you look at most religious people, they are into their religion because of some basic factors.
Few of them are demographic, economic and psychological factors.

If your were born into a christian family, there's 95% probability that you end up being a christian. Same goes to other religions.

All religions rely on "Holy Books" that claims its divinity. As we all know each claims to be the right one, no?

Now, a Christian comes to me and says: hey Scaler, I want you to believe in Jesus Christ as your personal saviour. He's the only way. If you don't, you are f**king damned eternally in hell fire.

A Muslim guy came along: hi scaler, Allah is the only true God and Mohammed(pbuh) is his only prophet. If you don't believe in Allah, you are f**king doomed forever.

For now, let's leave all other religion because they all say pretty the same thing. And mind you, we have 1000's of religions on this planet.

First, I don't blame the xtian guy for his belief. He read a book and he believed what was written in the book. Anything he's saying, he always refer to the book as a reference, right?
Likewise the muslim guy.

The christians say their book is divinely published, the muslim guy say his book is divinely published. So the question is, WHO IS RIGHT?

Just follow this line of thought and follow what people will be using to justify their beliefs ......



Their Holy Book !!!! Written several centuries ago by unknown authors.

BRB!!

Atheism and Religion are but two sides of the same coin.

One prefers to use its head, while the other relies on tales.


People are now using more of their brain !!!

You tried .....

Sad or should I say HILARIOUS

The topic says it all.
Public place can be restaurants, public swimming pool, hotels, shopping malls, cinemas etc.
Please put the number in front of your post

I'll start.

1) Walk in stark nakehd!!!

As a Pastafarian, I am receiving an auto-suggestion (revelation in layman term) from the monstrous FSM.

Still downloading .........

#

10 - You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 - You feel insulted and "dehumanized" when scientists say that people evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the Biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 - You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune God.

7 - Your face turns purple when you hear of the "atrocities" attributed to Allah, but you don't even flinch when hearing about how God/Jehovah slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in "Exodus" and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in "Joshua" including women, children, and trees!

6 - You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that the Holy Spirit impregnated Mary, who then gave birth to a man-god who got killed, came back to life and then fly into the sky.

5 - You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (few billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 - You believe that the entire population of this planet with the exception of those who share your beliefs -- though excluding those in all rival sects - will spend Eternity in an infinite Hell of Suffering. And yet consider your religion the most "tolerant" and "loving."

3 - While modern science, history, geology, biology, and physics have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in "tongues" may be all the evidence you need to "prove" Christianity.

2 - You define 0.01% as a "high success rate" when it comes to answered prayers. You consider that to be evidence that prayer works. And you think that the remaining 99.99% FAILURE was simply the will of God.

1 - You actually know a lot less than many atheists and agnostics do about the Bible, Christianity, and church history - but still call yourself a Christian.