3phase:
How old are you when you realised the word POLICE stands for "Public Officer for Legal Investigations and Criminal Emergencies" Don't lie o.

Missyajoke:
Where do you send your Girl child to for holidays
is it?

Friends
Cousins
Brothers
Sisters
Uncles
Neighbors.

If you know you can't train and watch a child grow under your roof till 20 years and above, Why then do you give birth to them. The earlier we realize we're living in a rotten society the better for our girls. The truth is that a girl child is not safe anywhere, so what should we do do as a parents?
1. Teach your daughters to dress decently: As a parent always cover up your child make sure she's properly dressed. Stop wearing skimpy dresses for your girl child.
2. Teach your girl sex education:. Most parents are afraid of this, but trust me this the 21st century they have to know cause if you fail to teach them they'll be taught outside.
3. Teach your girl some defense mechanisms by enrolling her in a karate class e.t.c
4. Teach your child not to betrusting aroun
d men of any nature.
5. Parents always listen to your children: If she's constantly complaining about someone listen to her. Don't be too busy to attend to her. Men it's not your wives responsibility to train a child you must also be involved. No matter how busy you are create time for your family,ask your son/ how he/she is doing. Look after your family, the sacrifice you make today are the price you'll gain tommorow. Help them do their assignment, from there you can know what's going on in their lives don't be an absentee father/ mother. Remember the child you fail to look after today won't look after you tommorow.
6.Mothers don't be careless with your children always monitor them.

Everyone is a potential suspect, you don't know who's looking for an opportunity to rape your daughter. The child you don't value today won't value you tommorow. He's/ she's stubborn draw him/ her close don't just ignore an unhappy child something or someone might be bothering her/him.


Have a nice day everyone..

Gentle0wavez:
I'm an introvert too. I'm enjoying this lock down to the fullest, I wonder how people get tired of staying indoors. I am very calculated and like to think over something very well b4 taking action and a lot of people mistake it for fear or that I'm shy but it's not true. Issues like age difference or even how dress can stop me from approaching you. I no dey fear class(if u like be Bill Gates daughter), if I'm single and you enter my eye and from my observation nothing do you. I will drop unexpectedly like bird shît and shoot my shot with R2 curve.

Edibles20:
We met at work. Honestly we both were ready to settle down, and I think it worked for us.
Now married, both of us run back home soon as we are done with work. We are our own crowd and groove. We both can remain indoors for the entire year without stepping out of the house.

marisdgreat:
The same way a girl should not trust any guy she is not married to

Bamo2020:
Lol! U r funny, so coming for u makes one of dem. Then maybe I should




quote author=shestrong post=90999693]A good number of them are rude, ribald and unruly. If you come for me then you are actually one of them.

jigganigga:
somebody go just smoke igbo finish dem go come nairaland dey ask rubbish question

frozen70:


You know we have different types of depression

You and I don't know what form of depression she is passing through

But I believe that having someone from the opposite sex, who will shows love to you, can as well make you happy

Sex is another way of feeling happy unless you don't experience orgasm

swagqueen:
My husband's folks are loyal to him because ofnthe things he does for them and therefore,no one talks to him.he's a lord on his own. And of course the issue of infidelity comes to play too. He monitors my every move and is free to do whatever he likes,go wherever he likes and the last time,i saw a particular number of a female that he saved with a man's name,when i talked, he went ahead to call me names again. Came to beat me up as usual but for once in my life.my i stood up to him and told him never to try it! I guess that scared him a bit cos he dropped the weapon he wanted to use in hitting me..... i got advice from well-meaning friends to leave his place and go to my parent's house to heal but knowing him,he would never come for us.

It means i have to start life afresh. 30 years with no money in the bank,with two children and no job! God!

peggykorol:
Once a man starts abusing the wife physically,he won't stop.it goes on and on.thats how mine started and I thought it would be the last.i know some people on NL feel am not real or I caused my problem myself but you are free to feel or think however you want
As am typing this now,I have some wounds on my back and hands.thats the recent beating I got from someone who claims to luv me very much.for every time I question his fidelity,I get beaten up seriously like a thief who stole in the market square.he sleeps with girls anywhere.ranging from his car to our matrimonial home to motels,
Now ask me how I knew all this

frozen70:


The truth is that everything around her has failed her, especially marriage and the guy she is married to

Now she is depressed and sees herself as being alone in the world

Even the presence of her son us no longer making an impact on her quite unlike other women that will take solace in their children

The good thing in her own case is that she is working so she goes out and comes in

I will suggest you visit her, spend weeks with her or she visits you spends time with you

She is already depressed no doubt but that visit will make her feel loved and happier

Marriage this days shouldn't be taken to heart or taken serious, bitter things are happening these days and no one knows why

She really need to stay with some one be it a man or a woman

She needs a companion and if she can get a lover and engage in sex and romance, she will be good from in to out

Imogenn:
Hi guys

I’m 3 months post part, meaning I just gave birth 3 Nearly 4 months ago. My child is fine, taken care of and I’m coping very well with motherhood.

My problem now is I added 25 kg during this pregnancy. I’ve lost some but I’m honestly still very fat. On top of that I have this dirty looking black skin in result of this pregnancy. I’m just feeling so ugly I want to know how I can lose this weight and lighten up my skin tone. Let it not be that my husband will start looking outside ahbeg lol. Not just that but generally I look disgusting. I am not happy with myself.

Mothers in the house how long did it take to lose your baby weight? And please I need advice on how to get back to my normal self. And also tips to get rid of this dirty black looking skin that I have. I want to glow.

pmoye:
You're really very perceptive.
You raised a very crucial point (in bold) about some men being fixated on the financial benefits that go to a woman in marriage. I keep asking some of them, what use do you have for your wealth when you're dead? And would you not rather leave it all for the woman who is to take care of your children, and your legacy for those that have one? Of course, assuming the man dies ahead of the wife.

I find it really hilarious when married men bicker with their wives over who owns what, the wives too returning the favour with 'His money is ours but mine mine'... I thought in marriage the two become one. This I find extremely childish and foolish. Foolish because these men are literally and practically ready to entrust their life unto their wives, but not their money. Which is more valuable, your life or your money?

You marry a woman, sleep in the same room with her (I am always scared to sleep with a woman in the same room ; what if she wakes up at time and kills me just to get access to whatever she thinks I have?? ), eat food and drink drinks prepared by her, be vulnerable 24/7 to her without be afraid that she will take your life, yet you do not want to trust her with your money. In this matter, I know there are instances where the woman is to blame, but I have a feeling most times that it is the man who lays down a bad and selfish example. In the end every man ends up having a wife that he deserves, not really the one that he wants. If you show leadership by treating her right, it is not likely that you will not have the best of friend, wife and mother in your wife. It is all about leading by example and selflessness... Even if your wife chop your money, isn't that infinitely better than a stranger does so? Your wife has a 100% stake in your life; no other person has that.



[/b]

pmoye:
This is advice is really for Nigerian ladies. Please and please do not marry a man that is not rich. Your very life will depend on it. You heard me... How long you live as a woman may well depend on how rich your husband is. This may seem like an over-generalization, but a very needful one. Quite a troubling percentage of Nigerian men can not handle a woman who is more financially buoyant.

Ideally it shouldn't matter how much each person earns, because I believe that the husband and the wife should be one financially. That the home should be planned like a company with budgets, financial planning, sound auditing and all... But from the much we have seen around the average Nigerian family is far from this ideal. We often have what increasingly looks like a union that appears more to serve a cultural/societal expectation, a union that is sustained just so that the society can think you are happily married, while between the man and the wife it is more like between US and China, between Northern and Southern Nigeria, a perpetual cold war and bitter jostling for resource allocation and control.

I have seen women who have died because the husbands couldn't afford antenatal care and used ego-motivated argument to keep the women from accessing timely medical care... And of course, few years or even months after that those wicked men would later bring in other wives into the house.

The poorer the man, the more wicked, the more angry, and the more deadly he generally is in Nigeria. Do not let any man or any woman convince you to marry for love. There is no such thing as that, just a queer surge of hormones that makes you think you are in love. If you marry a poor man for love, hunger and suffering will soon reset your thinking, and by then most women feel too culturally compelled to remain with the toxin of a husband they have. Take a cue from evolutionary development in animal kingdom generally where females select the most suitable male for mating.

Do not simply believe in a man's future plans and dreams. If he doesn't have money now, he is not ready to be a husband. No matter how much you think you love him, treat him like the case of AS genotype (yours) marrying an SS genotype (his). And this is something I respect some Igbo men for. They will never think of marrying a woman unless they are economically ready.

If he is earning N30,000, or N40,000 or N90,000 per month he is not ready to marry. These are just examples from posts I have seen around here. Do not be fooled, the amount on the payslip is not always available for taking care of the home. But that's the talk for another day.

Some of us are probably never going to get married, I personally find it very scary to read about how men because of poverty increasingly turn against their wives in marriage... I may be too traditional though, because I do not fvcking care the money the wife is bringing into the house. Her role as a mother and a wife is already supremely more than you need to compensate for as a man. If you are a man, do not get close to a man when you are still poor. It is wickedness. It is dishonesty. It is crime against humanity. Do not sell her a future hope of becoming a pastor and other popular silliness.

Marrying a lady when you cannot completely and single-handedly take care of her is gender violence. Stop it.

FlordFlorez:
Im done with marriage.

UDOKABESTLUV:
See The Photo Of The Man That Killed His Son And Daughter Below:

davidhandsome:
Growing up, i first heard the word PTSD(post traumatic stress disorder) in American military movies and all...
But that term always sounded funny, even the idea of ptsd looked absurd to me...

I wondered how a soldier could suffer a thing as this just by going to war and fighting. I couldn't just create a logical connection between the soldier's battle experience and his ptsd syndrome in those movies.

But my reasoning changed when i had an encounter with the Nigeria police force or SARS as we all know them as.

On this fateful day, i accompanied a friend of mine to buy his new phone.
We had earlier met a seller here on Nairaland selling the phone (second hand).
We met at a popular junction and just as we were inspecting the phone, from nowhere, 3-5 fierce looking men just gripped my hands with that of my friend, including the seller and instantly directed us to a bus.

The intense fear that gripped me ehn, i just cannot explain. In as much as i was afraid, everything still looked like a movie.
I mean, i have been hearing about this sarz thing, but i never imagined it could happen to me..

With fear in my heart, we entered the bus, i was able gain my composure back after 2mins or so...
They asked for my phone ( meanwhile, i was still holding the phone of the seller, coz i was testing it when they grabbed us), i gave them my phone. They check my mail and WhatsApp an found nothing, they asked for my i.d card, i produced it..
They saw it was intact.

Then they asked about the seller phone, i told them i and my friend were inspecting the phone for purchase when they grabbed us..

They said itz a lie, that we are buying stolen phone. ( I think they myt have actually allowed my friend and i go, if not for the seller phone with me).

As i tried explaining how i met the seller here on on Nairaland they shut me up and even threatened to shoot us. The fear came back again.

That's how they bundled us into the bus o..and told the driver to head to station..

At that point my head was spinning, i felt caged, it was a very scary feeling...i felt my freedom taken from me...

In the bus, they started telling us how we were buying a stolen phone(phone that we haven't paid for o).
Saying it is a very criminal offence to buy a second hand phone. Hearing this, the fear in me trippled...
I then resorted to pleading, even my friend was already crying..
They scared us more by telling us the big amount of money our parents would pay for bail..

We drove for over 45mins, and as we were about getting to the station, they asked for bribe...
Mind you, i was happy to hear this, i didn't want to enter the station at all.
There, we negotiated and eventually sorted them out.

Bt since then, the fear i felt that day has been living with me, when i see a policeman or hear a siren.
It is like I'm relieving the experience again...
The first week after the incidence was torture...i couldn't get that fearful feeling off my mind..

Right now, i have been able to relate better with the PTSD experience soldiers experience.

Even going out now seem difficult...i always imagine them stopping me again and relieving the whole fearful experience again...

I hope it gets better..maybe later in life, i would go see a psychologist...

Maybe sharing this would actually make me feel better, i do not know...

arimahoseloka:
Marriage is hard work, lol u think say na beans.. do u know the stress a child alone can put parents through not to talk of house chores or financial aspect.. see building a family is no joke. You have to be ready, sometimes you will not get to sleep all because of children you birthed. Marriage works when there is effective partnership, if not someone will definitely break down because stress can kill.

Mayng01:
Make her happy, show her love & take good care of her , you will see she will never stop looking attractive. That problem lies with us, men, we are the reason why 90% of them stop looking attractive. She was and has been attractive while with her parents & she stopped looking attractive after you have taken her away. Take good care of your woman & spend time with her and the kids, just lavish her with affection. I pray for all men, may God help & strengthen you financially. Did fani Kayode’s wife stop looking attractive? You know the answer & I hope you get the message.

aristocrazzy:
its because men stop spending on them after marriage. they now rely on only one man for upkeep. that's why I advice women to be independent and make money before getting married because all those money that you were collecting from suitors will varnish after wedding.

Stephenomozzy:
Two Things

1. The Identity she has about herself
A woman who has a modest appreciation of herself will not be comfortable looking haggard or unkempt. She will see herself as a queen that needs to be maintained and do all she can to look good first FOR HERSELF AND THEN HER HUSBAND.

She doesn't tone down the beauty that attracted the husband in the first place just because she has achieved the married status. She would dress for HER OWN ESTEEM AND NOT NECESSARILY TO IMPRESS ANYONE OTHER THAN THE HUSBAND.


2. The man she got married to

Some men quickly turn to irresponsible people after marriage and they suffocate the beauty and attractiveness out of their wife. Some strain her with house chores and the kids without helping and others fail in finances as the woman assumes the position of bread winner