₦airaland Forum

Imindmywords:
Dis man might be N43.1B richer...... you gerrit??

Timoleon:
video of the accused does no help really. A video of the missing dick at least while it was missing and what it looked like when it was returned will aid us more

Timoleon:
You mentioned me first. My original post mentioned no one. If you simply typed away, I wouldn’t bother mentioning you as I have not mentioned others who simply gave their opinions or ‘shared their experience’. If you mention someone, expect a conversation which includes asking and answering questions to reach an agreeable conclusion. SHALOM

Timoleon:
Before the shrink, were you aware of what it looked like? What if your neighbor had invited a female or females over who had mocked him for having a shrinky dickk and being afraid that the mockery might getbon the street he decided to put the plane on a phantom caller?

If a mere call can take away someone’s dickk, what is helping the rest of us keep out dickks? After all by putting random numbers together you can easily get through to another man within 2 minutes.

Kobojunkie:
So, it wasn't missing? Did you see it yourself?

Timoleon:
Always a fake story.

Backwards neighborhoods like these, you can hurt your rival by raising false alarms based in superstitions. Dumb heads will spring into mob action and lynch the person. If taking a person’s dickk is possible by touch, we’d all be dickless. Our markets are crowded, you can’t use public transport with being touched. A ‘dickk stealer’ would easily sit in between two men in our buses and get off without any suspicions. Alas it’s just superstition, everyone gets home with their dickks every freaking day.

The police must arrest the person raising the false alarm and catch scapegoats amongst the mob that tortured the man.

Igboslayer:
Obi: I totally won the election!
INEC: Actually, you came in third place.
Obi: I object! Let's take this to court.

Court: So, Obi, what's the deal?
Obi: Your Honors, I'm here to snatch back my "so-called" mandate.

Court: Mandate, you say? Who swiped it?
Obi: INEC did! They're the culprits!

Court: INEC, care to defend your innocence?
INEC: Your Honors, Obi's just a stand-up comedian. Ask him for some proof!

Court: Obi, any witnesses to this comedy?
Obi: My devoted group, Your Honor. They're convinced I'm the champ.

Court: Dear Obidients, got any receipts?
Obidients: Well, on Twitter, we showered millions of INSULTS, ABUSES & CURSES on Obi's rivals, but INEC missed the memo.

Court: INEC, why the oversight?
INEC: Your Honors, we tally votes, not tweets.

Court: Obi, any other star witnesses?
Obi: My pastors!

Court: Pastors, what's your spiel?
Pastors: We prophesied Obi's win a million times, but INEC ignored our divine wisdom.

Court: INEC, any comment on this prophecy?
INEC: Your Honors, we're vote counters, not fortune tellers.

Court: Obi, so your A-team is the social media insult champs and the pulpit prophets?
Obi: Yep, that's my dream team! 😂

Court: Well then, Obi, your mandate is with the Twitter trolls and the pulpit preachers. You can be the President of Insults and Prophecies!

CASE DISMISSED! 😂😂

Acekidc4:
Efemiewele really destroy that CBN badly!! The idiot will rot in Prison Insha Allahu!! Very Wicked Evil Man!!

agulion:
Terrorism and Islam are inseperable

ThiefnubuBandit:
Another criminal wan enter government to steal funds. Ask yourself sincerely why you want to contest for elections. I know as you know that you don't have anything to offer members of the public.

Trustmea:
Ordinary counselor mtcheew even SUG president steal more money than those niggars

Timagex:
Once I see "a man walks due east", it's over. 😁

FalseProphet1:
If the man holding the rope is eying his wife, he would stylishly let go of the rope so that the man can drown and he'll have the deceased man's wife all for himself.

This heart of man is terribly wicked. Know this and have peace.

This I have seen.

OGIBRA:
SIMPLY PUT...

Federal government spent 1.4trillon naira more than the amount them make from january to march, according to figures from CBN...

Nigeria, i hail thy ooo...

Baitullah:
I sense this is a trap to identify nairaland thieves

Acekidc4:
An eye for an eye only make the world go blind.

jmoore:
6 years is for substandard job.

A good road should last minimum 15 years.

muykem:
How? Where you have 100% Muslim, fight will still start between Sunni and Shia etc.

favour32:
What of Buhari, the ring leader?

Longinyamapucci:
Keep kwayet, enjoy your hardship ewu.

Longinyamapucci:
Obi kill you there..the man won and was rigged out..how is the crazy economic problem today his fault.

Clown.

Hedonisco:
You don't start a 'relationship' with any girl you met online. Anywhere online... Worst of all Twitter, Instagram, Snapchat, Facebook, Nairaland, etc (in that order). Not to mention olosho sites like Tinder and the rest.

As a veteran in the game I can tell you that lots of correct 'relationshipable', marriageable girls are not active online. You have to meet and engage them in real life. The old fashioned way. Yeah they could have a Facebook account or something, but not really the types who live and breathe social media.

Any girl that is super active on these social media platforms is lost. Date or marry at your own risk.

Olasyke:
Something at 40 is something forever.

Skankamola:
Face the truth oga, The Bible says a third of the disciples would be deceived by the antichrist to turn away, so there is nothing new about that.
You choose to believe whatever you want, but the truth remains what it is regardless of you.

Skankamola:
Yes your prophet was the most peaceful man ever, he never owned any sex slaves, he never murdered any of his critics and all muslims follow same pattern. Your quran 9:5 never said you should murder any one for his disbelief. Snakes.

ANTlSLAAM:
MASS ALARM

ANTlSLAAM:
If you don't fight for allah as read in these your below Quran verses, can you tell what you're doing for allah then?

Quran 8:39

Abdul Hye

And (O believers) fight them until there is no more mischief and the religion (Islam) is established completely for Allah alone. But if they cease (worshipping others besides Allah), then surely, Allah is All-Seer of what they do.


Quran 9:5

But when the forbidden months are past, then fight and slay the Pagans (Christians and Jews) wherever ye find them, an seize them, beleaguer them, and lie in wait for them in every stratagem (of war); but if they repent, and establish regular prayers and practise regular charity, then open the way for them: for Allah is Oft-forgiving, Most Merciful.

Sebastine1994:
Inshallah.

But why do Muslims fight for their God