₦airaland Forum

united fans re still asking for thier ticket refund cos they paid to watch football not basketball,

A Boy Was Driving A Car,
A Girl Was Trying To Overtake Him Rashly.
Boy: “Hey…Buffa lo!”
,
Girl Shouts Back: “You Pig, Donkey, Stupid!”
, Then She had Accidents And Hits The Buffalo Crossing The Road.

Moral: Girls Never Understand What Boys Say

Dad: I want u 2 marry a girl of
my choice.
Son: No
Dad: The girl is Bill Gates' daughter.
Son: Then ok
, Dad goes 2 Bill Gates
Dad: I want ur daughter 2 marry my son.
Bill Gates: No
Dad: My son is d CEO of the World Bank.
Bill Gates: Then ok
Dad goes 2 the President of the World Bank,
Dad: Apoint my son as the CEO of ur bank.
President: No!
Dad: He is the son-in-law of Bill Gates.
President: Then ok!
This is BUSINESS

Ultimate reply on cellphone: >
Girl: "i got new Boyfrnd
he is smarter, intelligent and hotter than you,
so give me my photo back, "

Boy sent 47 Girlfrnd's photo's and said:

"i forgotten ur face Darling
so plz select ur photo yourself and send back d remaining. ."

little girl came home from school and said to her mother, "Mommy, today in school I was punished for something that I didn't do."
The mother exclaimed, "But that's terrible! I'm going to have a talk with your teacher about this , by the way, what was it that you didn't do?"

The little girl replied, "My homework,

Wife asked her husband to describe her
husband said u are, "A B C D E F G H I J"
wife asked, "what does dat mean?"
he said,"Adorable Beautiful Cute Delightful Elegant Fairy Gorgeous
she says wow dats so lovely,"what about "I J K"
He said," I'm Just Kidding,

Student: teacher!!
Teacher: yes!
Student: can I ask u something
Teacher: yes go on
Student: will u punish Me if I don't do anything at all
Teacher: of course not
Student: good, I didn't do my homework

A teacher asks a class of students to stand up if there was anyone who thought they where an idiot slowly a boy raised to his feet the teacher laughed and asked Why do u consider yourself an idiot the boy replies i dont i just hate to see you standing all by yourself,
,
MAN: Boy, wats ur dad's name?
BOY: His name is LAUGHING.
MAN: And ur mother's name?
BOY: SMILING.
MAN: You must b kidding?
, BOY: No, that's my brother , I'm JOKING!!!!:
,
What is a girl friend?
Addition of problems, subtraction of money, multiplication of enemies & division of friends.
,
Daughter: Im In Love With Neighbour,
So I'm Running Away With Him

, Dad: Thx Dear

U Save My Money & Time

Daughter: Dad Im Reading Dis Letter Left by mum.

glad y`ll like it.

‎3 men in Prison-
A Rapist
A Psycho
&
A Gay.
,
Rapist: If I Find a Cat here I will #uck it hard till it Dies!

Psycho: Oh Yeah! & Once its dead I wl #uck it till I die!

Gay Standing in the Corner Softly Says: *Meeoowww,

Before Marriage ♥
Boy: At last i can Hardly wait!
Girl: Do you want me to leave?
Boy: No don"t even theink about it!
Girl: Do you love me?
, Boy: Of course, always!
Girl: Have you ever cheated on me?
Boy: No, why are you asking?
Girl: Will you kiss me?
Boy: Every chance i get
Girl: Will you slap me?
Boy: Hell no, are you crazy?!
Girl: Can I trust you?
Boy: Yes!
Girl: Darling!!
After marriage Read It backwrds,

Dad: Dear son, this time u must score 95% in ur exams
Son: no dad i will score 100%
Dad: why are u joking?
Son: who started it?

Son: hi father I'm back
father: hugs his son and he smells smoke of cigarette frm his jacket " u smoke"?
son: no why?
father: don't lie to me lemme check your pockets after checking he finds 2 cigarettes and a wine bottle and starts hitting his son so hard and throws him out of the house.
son: rings the door bell
father: now what ready for apology ??
son: no i just wanna tell you that the jacket was yours not mine
,
WIFE - OUR NEIGHBOUR SON GOT 99 MARKS IN MATHS .
HUSBAND - WHERE DID THE ONE MARK GO ?
WIFE - IT COME TO OUR SON !!!
,
SIX GOLDEN RULES FOR F***ING !
1) F***ing once a week is good for your health, but it is harmful if done everyday
2) F***ing relaxes your mind & body
3) F***ing refreshes you
4) After F***ing don't eat too much go for more liquids
5)Try F***ing in bed cause it can save your valuable energy
6) F***ing can reduce your cholesterol level
So remember "FASTING" is good for your health.
GOD BLESS YOUR DIRTY MIND,

from Signboard on electric Boxes Danger,10000 volts,TOUCHING dis will lead to DEATH Any1 found Touching will b jailed for 3 yrs,


Year 2020 Son to Dad:how did u meet Mom. Dad:Ah my Son It all started with a request, add as a friend on facebook,

Doctor 2 Lady: u r looking so weak n exhausted r u properly taking 3 meals a day as I had advised Lady: Oh my God I hear 3 males per day,

TEACHER: Which book has helped you most in your life? STUDENT: My fathers Cheque Book,

Teacher:Who is Ur Favorite Writer? Student:Ur Daughter. Every Week She Give Me a Nice Love Letter,

i`ll shoot her, satisfied?

good one pal funny

whaoooooo from today u can call me mike