₦airaland Forum

wit romade of course

oga ade ku ro lona joo

keep busying then

sky/roof, depends on wia u are

agbero

wia's urs?

to do or not to do, dats d question

am feeling dizzy

@hurstler

is dis hw u really look

meeen u are very harmsome

BOY : May I hold your hand?

GIRL : No thanks, it isn't heavy.



GIRL : Say you love me! Say you love me!

BOY : You love me,



GIRL : If we become engaged will you give me a ring??

BOY : Sure, what's your phone number??



GIRL : I think the poorest people are the happiest.

BOY : Then marry me and we'll be the happiest couple



GIRL : Darling, I want to dance like this forever.

BOY : Don't you ever want to improve??



BOY : I love you and I could die for you!

GIRL : How soon??



BOY : I would go to the end of the world for you!

GIRL : Yes, but would you stay there??



SHARON : Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning

kiss??

TRACY : I did once. He'd forgotten to take the

cigarette out of his mouth.



MAN : You remind me of the sea.

WOMAN : Because I'm wild, romantic and exciting?

MAN : NO, because you make me sick.

WIFE : You tell a man something, it goes in one ear

and comes out of the other.

HUSBAND : You tell a woman something: It goes in both

ears and comes out of the mouth.



MARY : John says I'm pretty. Andrew says I'm ugly.What

do u think,

Peter?

PETER : A bit of both. I think you're pretty ugly.



1) Girlfriend : ", And are you sure you love me and

no one else ?"

Boyfriend : "Dead Sure! I checked the whole list again

yesterday".



2) Teacher : "Which is more important to us, the sun

or the moon?"

Pupil : "The moon".

Teacher : "Why?"

Pupil : "The moon gives us light at night when we need

it but the sun gives us light only in the day time

when we don't need it".



3) Teacher : "What do you call a person who keeps on

talking when people are no longer interested?"

Pupil : "A teacher".


4) Waiter : "Would you like your coffee black?"

Customer : "What other colors do you have?"



5) My father is so old that when he was in school,

history was called current affairs.



6) Teacher : "Sam, you talk a lot !"

Sam : "It's a family tradition".

Teacher : "What do you mean?"

Sam : "Sir, my grandpa was a street hawker, my father

is a teacher".

Teacher : "What about your mother?"

Sam : "She's a woman".



7) Tom : "How should I convey the news to my father

that I've failed?"

David: "You just send a telegram: Result declared,

past year's performance repeated".



Teacher : "Now, children, if I saw a man beating a

donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be

showing?"

Student : "Brotherly love".



9) Teacher : "Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say

prayers before eating?"

Sam : "No sir, I don't have to, my mom is a good

cook".



10) Patient : "What are the chances of my recovering

doctor?"

Doctor : "One hundred percent. Medical records show

that nine out of ten people die of the disease you

have. Yours is the tenth case I've treated. The others

all died".


11) Teacher : " Can anybody give an example of

COINCIDENCE?"

One Student : "Sir, my Mother and Father got married

on the same day and at the same time."

weldone frank, u've really tried, but i found it difficut to laff cox i cnt read

Caller: Hello, is this the Help Line?

HelpLine: Yes, it is. How may I help you?

Caller: The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty period. How do I go about getting that fixed?

HelpLine: I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?

Caller: Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer.

HelpLine: Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?

Caller: It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a promotional. It just has '4X' on it.

At this point the HelpLine operator realized that the caller had been using the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off the drive.

An overweight clerk consulted the doctor for advice. The doctor advised that the clerk run 10 miles a day for 30 days. This, he promised, would burn off as much as twenty pounds.

The clerk follows the doctor's advice and, after thirty days, was pleased to note a loss of twenty pounds.

The clerk phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, there was one last question:

"How do I get home, since I'm now 300 miles away?"

sure, e-darling

Sweet T:
I don't know why anybody is surprised about this. Ekiti people have always known to be strong-headed. They fight and argue about everything and anything. This is no news, it's just a reflection of who the are. Awon Omo Alagidi.

sweet T, so rae o

who turn dwarf?

pls say somtin

romade's kind of helmet

A minister delivered a sermon in ten minutes one Sunday morning, which was about half the usual length of his sermons. He explained, "I regret to inform you that my dog, who is very fond of eating paper, ate that portion of my sermon which I was unable to deliver this morning".

After the service, a visitor from another church shook hands with the preacher and said, "Pastor, if that dog of yours has any pups, I want to get one to give to my minister".

its OK nw

This is a love letter from a boy to a girl,

However, the girl's father does not like him and want them to stop their relationship. , and so, The boy wrote this letter to the girl,

he knows that the girl's father will definitely read this letter,

1 "The great love that I have for you

2 is gone, and I find my dislike for you

3 grows every day. When I see you,

4 I do not even like your face;

5 the one thing that I want to do is to

6 look at other girls. I never wanted to

7 marry you. Our last conversation

8 was very boring and has not

9 made me look forward to seeing you again.

10 You think only of yourself.

11 If we were married, I know that I would find

12 life very difficult, and I would have no

13 pleasure in living with you. I have a heart

14 to give, but it is not something that

15 I want to give to you. No one is more

16 foolish and selfish than you, and you are not

17 able to care for me and help me.

18 I sincerely want you to understand that

19 I speak the truth. You will do me a favor

20 if you think this is the end. Do not try

21 to answer this. Your letters are full of

22 things that do not interest me. You have no

23 true love for me. Good-bye! Believe me,

24 I do not care for you. Please do not think that

25 I am still your boyfriend."

So bad!! However, before handing over the letter to the girl, the boy told the girl to "READ BETWEEN THE LINES", meaning-only to read 1.3.5.7.9.11. 13

(Odd No.'s). Go read it once again but the Odd Number lines,

Several years ago, when I lived in New York and flew to customer sites often, my wife would usually drop me off at Newark (N.J.) airport and pick me up when I returned. On one trip, I was only going to be gone for a few days, so I drove myself, and parked the car at Newark.

When I returned, the weather was lousy, and it was late at night. I wanted nothing more than to get home to the comfort of my wife and my own bed. When I arrived, the storm was very loud, with crashing thunder and Severe lightning. As I came into my bedroom about 2 a.m., I found my two children, Alex (3) and Cindy (12), in bed with my wife, Carolyn, apparently scared by the loud storm.

I resigned myself to sleeping in the guest bedroom that night. The next day, I talked to the children, and explained that it was okay to sleep with Mom when the storm was bad, but when I was expected home, please don't sleep with Mom that night. They said okay.

After my next trip several weeks later, Carolyn and the children picked me up in the terminal at the appointed time. Since the plane was late, everyone had come into the terminal to wait for my plane's arrival, along with hundreds of other folks waiting for their arriving passengers.

As I entered the waiting area, Alex saw me, and came running shouting "Hi, Dad! I've got some good news!"

As I waved back, I said loudly, "Hi, Alex! And what is the good news?"

"The good news is that nobody slept with Mommy while you were away this time!" Alex shouted.

The airport became very quiet, as everyone in the waiting area looked at Alex, then turned to me, and then searched the rest of the area to see if they could figure out exactly who his Mom was.

eeeeeoooooooo
who said dat? i was never in a bad mood, i tlk watever rubbish i av in mind at d very moment
i was only offline due to some lil problem we got wit our gen, n u know nigeria PHCN now (NEPA- Never Expect Power Always), so i may even be off anymoment from now, by next week all shud be well

me ke, bad mood? tufiakwa

duro de wa oo, am bo

ko soro, ema jabo lo

nice one gabby

na d TV dey very important to d boy na

At the height of a political corruption trial, the prosecuting attorney attacked a witness. "Isn't it true," he bellowed, "that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?"

The witness stared out the window as though he hadn't hear the question.

"Isn't it true that you accepted five thousand dollars to compromise this case?" the lawyer repeated

The witness still did not respond.

Finally, the judge leaned over and said, "Sir, please answer the question."

"Oh," the startled witness said, "I thought he was talking to you."

A Soviet journalist walks into the hospital and tells the desk nurse, "I want to see the eye-ear doctor."

"There is no such doctor" she tells him. "Perhaps you would like to see someone else?"

"No, I need to see an eye-ear doctor," he says.

"But there is no such doctor," she replies. "We have doctors for the eyes and doctors for the ear, nose and throat, but no eye-ear doctor."

No help. He repeats, "I want to see the eye-ear doctor."

They go around like this for a few minutes and then the nurse says: "Comrade, there is no eye-ear doctor, but if there were one, why would you want to see him?"

"Because," he replies, "I keep hearing one thing and seeing another."

tnx y'all


"Do you believe in life after death?" the boss asked one of his employees.

"Yes, Sir." the employee replied.

"Well, then, that makes everything just fine," the boss went on. "After you left early yesterday to go to your grandmother's funeral, she stopped in to see you."

re-boot ur system na