@timmy

WOW!!! nice pointers----are you really a bloke OR You must have lots of female friends

@ Timmy, your story is much more interesting than the original post. E be like soap opera.

Abeg keep me posted.

seeker:

@ Timmy, your story is much more interesting than the original post. E be like soap opera.

Abeg keep me posted.

I posted it for advice not to see how many awards it will win

timmy:



i wasn't dating anyother person, maybe you should just do some new stuffs in the relationship.
Sometimes in a womans life, you need to reposition your self and make your man want you more.

1. change your looks, try some new hair styles, new cloths change your smell (perfume) and all that
2. act more sexy like. try being innovative during sex(thats if you guys do it)
3. make him no about a few of the guys that are wooin you, somtimes create imaginary one, but be careful when duin this, because it maight back fire
4. impress him (not like pushing yourself around him), with gists and calls at odd times
5. tell him, you have headache, belly upsets and all the sicky things, that would make him give you a little attenstionand care.
6. try to replace your self, make him want you more
7. Try to always believe in him, support him, when ever he looses his faith. make sure you help him find it

lol lol

I didn't say i don't get attention or care. I get enough attention from him. The advice you give is for ladies whose relationship needs spicing up. I just wanted commitment from him. It has been established i wont get it from him right now because he enjoys having his cake and eating it like most men will.



Seems like some guys don't understand the term commitment as they think it automatically means marriage.

@Timmy what does commitment mean to you?

My bad! I though commitment and marriage were synonymous in women terminology; I had been asked a question about commitment at one point and I thought I was being asked to propose marriage.

Please can you give further details on this commitment issue and can a man be committed without outright marriage proposal?

@desiree lol, me blush

@Hot_coco, girl, "NO MAN" would give a commitment to a lady he aint sur about, just the same way it is with the ladies too. I feel your ma has not seen the proper reason for commitment, you dont give it, your earn it. You really have to prove it to him that he needs to show some commitment Another irony of it all is that, he may be commited already, but you are the one not seeing things as it is, Somtyms we give ourselves selfish reasons, you just have to learn more about your man. We man are diffrent at evry level in life

A man is diffrent when he wants you, diff. when he just gets you, diff when he wants sex, diff. whe he's broke, diff. when he has money, diff when, yada yada,

So maybe he is in another diffrent state only you have to find out and adjust to it.

As regards seeing other women, well its a mans chioce, even when i say i didnt see other girls (in true sence) i still had some flings back then. but after sometime i got over them.

if he still give you all the care and attention you need, then other girls are just trips, evry man likes to know girls want him, and many girls like a man whois hooked, they feel they are better thats why another girl hooked him up,
So _coco relax, yur man is yours, just say that to your self, take a deep breath and smile

Spend the weekend together making love and evrything would be just fine

The only reason I can support a break-up in any relationship is infidelity - and that's only if either party is willing to let go. From my observation, you love this guy, he loves you half, he's playing pranks, you are trying to hold on, he comes back to you. Something tells me he'll always come back to you. Its up to you be the waiter or the driver.
If you love him, then enjoy the love you have for him, but if you doubt him, which is natural, then start making yourself available for a back-up (which is not healthy for true love, but is safer).

My advice: this guy is hiding a lot from you, he wants to eat his cake and have it. Kindly dust your bucks and sing Eamon to him. Pronto!

Gal

it takes both parties to commit

If 1 party is fucking up

Then , Bleep all

The guy sincerely never ready !!!!

Move up

I did not say move , I said move up

meaning ,

playing his card well, dude's a neat player gettin it on with Hot coco and them other sista's, sure love to get some lessons from them nigga, not like my game ain't neat but always chance for improvement

if a guy  insists on meeting your family and wants u to meet his then he is more or less serious bout you

madam, dont u think u acting like someone desperate?one good thing wit we guyz is independence, we dont always seem to accuse our babes of non-commitment but its ladies dat push guyz aroung to say things dey aren;t ready to involve in.
my candid advise is u allow things to happen d way it comes, like i normally say,,wats gonna b will be, instead of u wasting ur time wit marriage,,find how to develop urself and he will sure come looking for you coz no one wants a liability.tk kia.

abakinola:

madam, don't u think u acting like someone desperate?one good thing wit we guys is independence, we don't always seem to accuse our babes of non-commitment but its ladies that push guys aroung to say things dey aren;t ready to involve in.
my candid advise is u allow things to happen d way it comes, like i normally say,,wats going to b will be, instead of u wasting your time wit marriage,,find how to develop yourself and he will sure come looking for you because no one wants a liability.tk kia.

For the upteenth time i didn't say i want marriage and no i am not desperate! I unlike 'we guys' believe in sticking to one person, helping them grow and investing training time. (Yes men have to be trained).

What the heck are you trying to say about me being a liability? Am i your woman? you may have the audacity to call her a liability but dint even go there with me. What on earth are you talking about independence? I guess you mean 'your space to sleep around' which in turn will turn out to be a liability to your women when your hood catches fire!

If you don't understand, ask! Don't go putting your 2 Kobo and then insult me while at it!

laughzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.Hot-coco, u sabi vex oo, anyway,im so sorry to ave bn on d offensive, Honestly i never meant ur thinking.was only giving u an insight into men's world, u know im a guy and very much in d system(though single),
Are u sure ur guy is not running 4rm commitment coz of ur paranoid, i can tell ua short tempered.!!

@ abakinola

Am i short tempered just because i replied to your insults or you have a way of knowing how people are? You seem to have a rather negative perception of women. You are yet to explain how a woman can be a liability, what financially? emotionally? You are speaking from a bachelor's point of view and it shows through your words.

I did not post the entire story just the areas i needed advice on so as i said before ask before you start the sarkiness. Also i am not paranoid. Women never are.

laughssssssssss.Hot-coco i dey gbadun uu.really i think ua right about my having a wrong perception about women coz ave had a fairly bad xperience wit my ex which has made me to be outta a relationship 4 the past 15months running(im scared of dating another now), as per the liabilty issue,wat i actually meant was for the partners involved to be financially compatible and not as in bn a liability as it literally means, wat i do tell my kid sis is to 4get about a guy and secure her future first coz once a right thinking,positive thinking and ambitious young man knows his gal is up and doing,,he's got no reason not to be committed, after dat then comes the issue of behaviour or manners as you know.
Are we friends now?

Actually men over here are scared of a woman who is 'up and doing' and tend to go for the less confident ones who will then think the sun shines out of their .

Men do not commit because they feel it will lead to marriage. Simple. I can be doing well financially, submissive as a housewife, prepare finger lick'n meals, be a slut in the bedroom along with a body that's slamming and the man will still have a reason not to commit.

Its not us women with the problem, its the men.

It's time i find me a real man!

yeah you are absolutely right.dat happens at times coz the up and doin ones tend to be kindda non-submissive but if u chose to have all d qualities u mentioned(apart 4rm bm a slot in bed)any right thinking guy shuld worship n cherish u.
However,if u need a real man,,im here for u, im still very much single n ready to love someone dat will appciate my love(mayb someone like u, laughs) .whadayathink?hot-coco

lol

Every man wants a woman who can 'work it' in the bedroom. Even you, so don't even go there with the stooshness. I won't front, I would like a man who can give me the 'wickedest slam' and entertain my mind. If your woman was crap in bed you would look elsewhere to get satisfied. Admit it.

You said you were too scared dating another and now you are suggesting you jump into the fire with me? lol

laughs,
hot-coco, u really my kindda gal, yeah i admit to prefer a woman dats very very good in bed coz i myself love sex but im only saying i wuld rather use anoda word for her skill in bed,
wit d way u are replying me,,i think its smone like u dat suits me, ua a great fun and challenging 2, i really dey feel u, tk gud care of urself(laughssssssssssss)

Sharp guy, (this is the serious guy we've been talking about!)

laughssssssssssss

just look at his way of acting

Girl, the guy keeps comimg back because you turn him on real good. Don't mistake it for love. Maybe he is even married and do not want to hurt you by telling you. Just have a dialogue with him, though am pretty sure he is going to lie, again.

my dear, the earlier u move on with ur life, the best for u!!!!! the truth of the matter is that he has "seen u all", there is nothing exciting again to look forward to. i believe in this saying "why buy the cow if u can get the milk for free?". men love "the chase"!!!! there must be that pully that will make them want to keep u. but in ur case, there is nothing more to pull u to him becos he has seen it all.

as for him not having the money, honey pls wisen up!!!! if ur boyfriend sees a babe he considers a wife material, he will be married b4 u say"jackpot". pls dear, i advice u take a firm decision. stop throwing urself at him. if he is truely serious, he wld marry u. if not, just be his friend. becos the truth of th matter is that he is blocking u from seeing serious guys that want u for keeps!!! becos once u meet another guy,u fail to see his interest in u becos right in ur heart, all u see is this guy that is using u to practice marriage. note if he marries someone else in future, he'll be a good hubby becos he has practiced everything abt marriage with u. so dear, the earlier u tell urself the bitter truth and move on, the ealier u'll find someone that truely loves and wants to keep u for life. but let him know that u'll still remain his friend and u r not leaving him becos he has no pay yet (after all u've been with him for the past 4yrs without pay).

good luck!!!!!!!!!

How Can I Tell If My Man Is Serious?
Wat a question? looking into his eyes alone will say maybe he is serious or not

Don't wait to think just move on with your life.

If he really wants you he will talk of marriage whetther he is settled or not.
Many available young men around just grab a GOOD one and keep him.

Cheers.
k.bobo

After 4 years, I think that you should move on.


For those that listen to friends, I recommend watching Modupe Temi, a wonderful movie by Saheed Balogun. Its Hilarious.

Im actually gonna watch that movie in a few mins

Although in this case one realy doesnt have to listen to friends to know taht being strung along for 4 years doesnt make any sense.

Its a great movie. u'll really enjoy it.

KarmaMod:

Im actually gonna watch that movie in a few mins

Although in this case one realy doesnt have to listen to friends to know taht being strung along for 4 years doesnt make any sense.

na watch I wanna watch, give me the site plzzzzzzzz

Here Ruby, you gotta put it on a playlist though.

This is clip 1


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4uuZc0bctY

Sisi Jinx:

Here Ruby, you gotta put it on a playlist though.

This is clip 1


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z4uuZc0bctY

Thank you mami Will watch it tonight

You'll enjoy it. . . one of the very few Yoruba movies I can watch again and again.

And to think I was forced to watch it by my older sisters!!