basisop: PLanning to get married to this divine package from heaven but immediately after the introduction, wahala started coming left, right, centre from both parents. Each seeing their child as treasure thereby attaching pride and condition to every single step.

We don't have any issue but the parental issue is really giving us sleepness nights.

Godspikin: For me i have some questions i would like answers to

Question 1: I would like truly born again brothers who have a fiancee to answer this (or an honest spiritual and matured response)...
My question is simple "Do you fantasize about your fiancee in the context of marriage" dis is what i mean, do you think of her sexually, in the context of her being your wife, not now that you are still courting.
Pls note that both of you believe in and are committed to sex after marriage

I will prefer that married people answer this...
Question 2: As a born again christian will it be appropriate to have MouthAction with your wife or either ways. Is it a sin?

nezer16: Weldone guys..am proudly a virgin @29 but i must say dat it takes d grace of God 2 preserve ur virginity either male or female..lets talk more on other points such as qualities nd how do u know u hav found d missing rib.

ifeci: [b]the rate of unemployment in the country has also led to as significant increase in the number of singles! boys wan marry but no(better)job and no kudi and the girls of nowadays are so greedy! [/b]the want the best of everything but they are not ready to work for it neither are the ready/patient to give their man support; the want ready made and the clock is ticking fast but ready made isn't coming for diner...but for men, the clock ticks slowly.

akanmumi: @guitarlife
I ve some serious doubts abt u?
Its either u re not a virgin as u claim or u re gradually backsliding.
Kissing and caressing is already a sin.
Then, u dnt sound like someone who rili has God's calling upon his life.cos if u re sure God wants to use u, u ll be engross in ur vision and how to fulfill ur vision.
U nid to go bck to God,cleanse urself from all filtiness and assure God that what ever plans he has for u ll be fullfilled.
Cos, sexual sin is the fastest killer of destiny .until u conquer it, u ll kip struggling spiritually and u may never bi able to withstand the days of tribulation.
Pls get this books 1) by kenneth E haggins--vision,plan and pursuits.
2)By david abioye--walking in the Newness of life.
May the lord help us.

passionate88: there are some gals that are not yet born again, but because of experiences nd dissappointments in life, if they are "LUCKY" 2 settle down, they will b more obedient than some of these our so called "born-again" sisters... That's my own thoughts, u can choose 2 disagree

phunmy dahdah: I feel ur pain, am sori dats wat u go tru wen u r a virgin
I av being in two relationships all my life do u knw wat my b.fs left me
Cos I decided not to av sex wit dem, dis is somethin we settled we wen we were
Deciding weda to go out or not. And some oda guys I intended to date to were askin for se
Wat do u want me to do, am a virgin I can't compromise my stand am not avin sex until am married
Av nt gone into any relationship for two years now cos I feel all guys wants to av sex wit me. Am not a saint but I Ju̶̲̥̅̊$t̶̲̥̅̊ decided to kip myself

Carius: Its very difficult for couples to admit to themselves or to any other person that they are not s3xually compatible.s3x is not synonymous wit sin.a lot of pple enta marriages wit pre-conceivd notions about intimacy such dat it would be easier to teach a pig how to sing than for them to change.i hate unpleasant surprises.it was here that i read d story of a lady who discovered dat d husband has a very tiny joystick that could not satisfy her.which mouth would she use to tell her pastor or her people that she's not fulfilled s3xually in her marriage?pls,don't let your marriage be lyk dis.d shame alone would kill u.

Carius: A smart businessman would always do his "due diligence".u would neva buy a product without checking it out.All truths are parallel,blind faith would not save u,cos ur faith shoudn't be blind in d first place.better a failed relationship than a failed marriage.just take a look at d divorce statistics.love alone isn't enough.lets not deceive ourselves.its not d big things that are responsible for faile marriages,its d little things.

exxell: GAY THREAD! Come to think of it, how many ladies have commented here? Or is because am viewing Nairaland on my LG plasma ............ Lols

sadeiyare:

You can divorce, but you should not marry another, except your spouse is dead.

1.Cor.7:39  The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord.

toba: U will definitely find someone that will share the same vision with u. calm down

duality:

This got me curious especially since you pointed out Mat 5;32 my question is "can you commit Fornication with a wife?" abi, is there an issue of semantics here?

musKeeto:
hehehehehehe... lmao... the thread dey smell lux, lux...

Zeebah23: I had 2 check anoda version of d bible NIV. It says 'but i tell you that anyone who divorces his wife,except for MARITAL UNFAITHFULNESS causes her to become an ADULTERESS...........and anyone who marries the divorced woman commits ADULTERY.

JstBrave:

yelz o, am a witness. My 1st love left me cos of dt, bt i am in anoda relationship now. He is 28 nd I am 24, we share d same vision (true love waits!).

Guitarlife: Typical of the modern christian to frown at any attempt to be realistic they'd rather be idealistic. How old are you if I may ask. You would have preffered it if I had chosen to conceal my trials and continued in them than to bring them to the fore and recieve encouragement to overcome them right ?
I hope you know this attitude is what has caused the 'church' to be where it is today. People like you would rather pretend and when brethren come to you for edification you'd rather condemn them.
You forget that we all have our time of temptation and the least you can do for your brother is not to judge him but encourage him.
Does it surprise you that you are the only one sharing your view ?
I do hope you'l learn a major lesson today .
You need to google the names of powerful men of God who have backslided it's cos nobody is impecable we are all striving.
I'm never as nauseated as at when I see a 'christian' judging others. You need to read your bible and ask for forgiveness too while at it.

sadeiyare:

Like Paul to Peter in front of the gentiles, you should have flooged her harder. Sawmill in the eyes christains lol

toba: We are almost saying the same
thing. Some pple are like one must not even divorce at all at all

toba: So one must remain single if the wife is still alive? i dont get it all

RedReact:

From my own perspective, God gave eternity to man, that is his will for him, but man forfeited the will of God by disobeying Him.
The fact that God says Sis A is a partner to Bro B does not mean that they will automatically be together forever if they neglect their own personal works and responsibility.

dasparrow:

@Bolded

Did God create the woman's mouth for a man to stick his private part into it? Was that God's intention when he gave you a p*en/is? What do you think sodomy is all about? If you see nothing wrong with o*ral s*ex, then you should not condemn homosex*uals either. O*ral s*ex is an unnatural s*ex activity and falls under the category of sex*ual perversion. It is not ordinary because the mouth was not created for you to stick your p*en/is which probably has dried up urine and sp*er/m around it into someone's mouth. It's not even hygienic.

Those of you who practice unnatural sex*ual acts do not have the Holy Ghost in you and have rejected God. Just because someone is your wife does not mean you have to start engaging in unnatural crap with the person. Very soon, you will begin to think of sticking your p*en/is into your wife's nose and ears and any other opening in the body. And soon after, bestiality will follow and some of you will come back here again to ask if there is anything wrong engaging in intimacy with your dog and goat.

Our world is becoming an increasingly sick place and judgement day will be very interesting. No wonder Jesus said that not everyone who called on him while on earth saying "Lord, Lord" will enter into the kingdom of heaven. He is referring to so-called Christians who want to serve Jesus and satan at the same time. Christians who go to church on Sunday but engage in worldly filth and perversion Monday through Saturday. Sadly, I see a lot of Nigerian Christians who fall under this category and then you wonder why God has turned His back on Nigeria and Nigerians are mocked and scorned everywhere we go.

toba: welcome.

lm moved by the need for there to be a discussion forum for christian singles on nairaland where issues bothering on dating, courting, singleness, heartbreaks, divorce, about to wed etc would be discussed, with people sharing their experiences of what they've passed through in the past, what they're going through presently and what they hope to go through/never want to go through in the future as regards relationships.

we are also free to list what we are looking out for in a would be life partner. i.e qualities and characters, when you hope to settledown.

one issue i also lok out for discussion is influence of parents, family members, religious leaders advice, friends opinion etc regarding choosing a partner.

lastly seeking GOD's opinion on marital matters.


the married can also come in to share their experiences in terms of challenges prior to and after the wedding.

hoping for a great discussion

dasparrow: @Bolded Did God create the woman's mouth for a man to stick his private part into it? Was that God's intention when he gave you a p*en/is? What do you think sodomy is all about? If you see nothing wrong with o*ral s*ex, then you should not condemn homosex*uals either. O*ral s*ex is an unnatural s*ex activity and falls under the category of sex*ual perversion. It is not ordinary because the mouth was not created for you to stick your p*en/is which probably has dried up urine and sp*er/m around it into someone's mouth. It's not even hygienic. Those of you who practice unnatural sex*ual acts do not have the Holy Ghost in you and have rejected God. Just because someone is your wife does not mean you have to start engaging in unnatural crap with the person. Very soon, you will begin to think of sticking your p*en/is into your wife's nose and ears and any other opening in the body. And soon after, bestiality will follow and some of you will come back here again to ask if there is anything wrong engaging in intimacy with your dog and goat. Our world is becoming an increasingly sick place and judgement day will be very interesting. No wonder Jesus said that not everyone who called on him while on earth saying "Lord, Lord" will enter into the kingdom of heaven. He is referring to so-called Christians who want to serve Jesus and satan at the same time. Christians who go to church on Sunday but engage in worldly filth and perversion Monday through Saturday. Sadly, I see a lot of Nigerian Christians who fall under this category and then you wonder why God has turned His back on Nigeria and Nigerians are mocked and scorned everywhere we go.

toba: Lets take it one after the other. I think in this time and age, all those dictation by family members should be long forgone. Back in this days when parents would say, this girl is from this family, dont marry, that girl is from awujale's family, marry her. In this time, no parent or family should dictate cos they are not going to be there with the couple 24hrs. We issues comes up, the couple would have to deal with that first before taking it beyond the boundaries of their home. However, we must still listen to our parent but they should only guide and not dictate. I would have married someone who already had a child, but my family pressurize me not to do it cos its some how not right in Yoruba land. I listened to them and later saw that they are right. Parents/ family can advice/guide but shouldn't dictate

Almost every guy that has gotten experience in life and also very conscious have this challenge. It mostly occur when we have many options and having to pick one ahead of the other poses great challenge. Im presently going through same at the moment but i told them in clear terms that God will direct on whom to pick,
I said something similar to this yesterday. Its as if those in church now are proud and feeling too big. Our MOG dont preach good behaviour and manners. Parents themselves have a lot to do in this regard. Pastors will only be telling them, 'dont worry, ur boaz is coming, just believe it' Pastors forget to tell them that they have to be of good behaviours like Ruth, hannah, Sarah and Esther. Honestly i dont care where ever she comes from. Provided she suits my taste and at least possess 70% of the qualities im looking for in a potential partner, i'll go for her

Very correct. I do pray a prayer that God should make me better than my wife in all spheres of life.

nnafather: I've taken my time to read most of the posts here:surely,we have great minds here...mature to the marrow. Though I don't cajol all the "diapers" of opinion here. I'm 32, getting married by April but still a virgin...courtesy of my self will...prayers,and engagement of my mind into so many positive things. Easy? NO! Though I jacked off in many occassions(I cried).God is faithful; He has seen me through.My still being a virgin is a personal covenant between me and God (when I was 16). I have to keep my part,and He has blessed me abundantly. The sexual energy has been coverted into heavy investment(talent discoveries) that will see me through(Financially) for the rest of my life.I'm blessed.

mediainspired: I wish i culd marry my fiancee dis Decemba, but we havnt completed d minimum courtship period set by d marriage committee in d church. And she isnt even allowed to frequent my house; so sometimes i kinda feel lonely (i told her so today). I pray my neighbor's sis moves away (her broda is sumtyms out of town on official assignment). I sense she may get desperate &women can be dangerous wen dey're ar. Recently, she askd me 4som moni. Even tho i had it, i didnt giv it so as 2kill attachmnts. Am able 2handle oda women, but dis is a neighbor... Close by

Bélla3: So you people have been gossiping behind my back?