There is this girl I know that is having serious problem and urgently needs help.She is engaged to her boyfriend who later travelled out.the guy changed on getting there with reduce communication and loss of affection.
The girl was really tied down till she was forced to remove the engagement ring after about 2 years without the guy coming home.As the pressure increased on her,she fell in love with her longtime childhood admirer.she saw in this guy what the first guy couldnt even imagine to become to the extent of telling the second guy that he can give up the first guy for his sake.

The problem now is that she is pregnant for the second guy and she feel guilty about it.should she abort the pregnancy or marry the second guy ? Please advise.

Sincerely, your write up is confusing.

Anyway, i dont see any problem here. I wonder why she want to abort the pregnancy. Is her second guy denying

A bird at hand is worth more than ten birds in the forest...
A d*ck at hand is worth more than thousand di*kz in male-hostel.
Why damage ur relationshp at hand for someone you are not sure would return ''single''??
TRY USE YOUR HEAD ABEG!!

First guy.. second guy... use fake names instead. Why sleep with the second guy and become pregnant.

its a lose lose situation. if the second guy is a 'sharp guy' which hopefully is not. The girl may have to be a single parent.

FIRST she says she would do "anything" for second bobo, now she is pregnant and the song don change........bwaaah!

it is well: Sincerely, your write up is confusing.

Anyway, i dont see any problem here. I wonder why she want to abort the pregnancy. Is her second guy denying

No,he is not denying but she is just wondering if she hadnt betray the trust of the first guy when went AWOL.

You are mixing issues here.Your question is 'comfusing'.
There's a pregnancy involved plus talk of marriage.Those two do not go hand in hand because they are not yet committed to each other.
If she fell in love with the second guy and chose to get pregnant for him,where does the abortion come in?
Has she has been rejected by the second guy or does she harbour hopes of reuniting with the first?

And what is the second guys opinion regarding the pregnancy?
If he fails to own up,then she must take responsibility as a single mum to be.That is what responsibility is about, not avoiding because it will come back to haunt.
Can't help thinking what could possibly go wrong in the process and what she stands to gain by aborting.

pendo89: You are mixing issues here.Your question is 'comfusing'.
There's a pregnancy involved plus talk of marriage.Those two do not go hand in hand because they are not yet committed to each other.
If she fell in love with the second guy and chose to get pregnant for him,where does the abortion come in?
Has she has been rejected by the second guy or does she harbour hopes of reuniting with the first?

And what is the second guys opinion regarding the pregnancy?
If he fails to own up,then she must take responsibility as a single mum to be.That is what responsibility is about, not avoiding because it will come back to haunt.
Can't help thinking what could possibly go wrong in the process and what she stands to gain by aborting.

The only worry on her mind is how she will feel if the first guy comes back and find out what hapens considering the fact that they were engaged before he travelled.Her conscience is sort of hitting her.

Rolling.:


The only worry on her mind is how she will feel if the first guy comes back and find out what hapens considering the fact that they were engaged before he travelled.Her conscience is sort of hitting her.

Why drain life out of the very thing we commit ourselves to,by failing to communicate?
The passion will die with time and then we start looking elsewhere!That is human nature. A romantic relationship needs constant communication to keep it burning and the flame in this case died long ago.Whatever remains of it exists only in her head.That is why it was easy for her to get pregnant for another man.

Now guilt and regret is not going to help here because the deed has been done is manifest.
Who knows what the guy has been up to for the 2 years anyway? Could he have impregnanted a girl? he is a man rem.
Well here is what,They both failed, but heavy responsibility lies on the girl cz she's soon going to be a mother!

You still haven't answered my question though.What is the second guy's position on this? Is he willing to marry her? Has he accepted responsibility?
Do they have a good relationship going on? Does he know about the first guy and the engagement? His stand?
Another angle to it is this,even though I blame lack of communication here. If one can be unfaithful during the engagement period to the extent of getting pregnant/sleeping around in case of a guy,how much more when she/he marries?

Anyway always put measures in place to safeguard or forget about long distance all together

pendo89:

Why drain life out of the very thing we commit ourselves to,by failing to communicate?
The passion will die with time and then we start looking elsewhere!That is human nature. A romantic relationship needs constant communication to keep it burning and the flame in this case died long ago.Whatever remains of it exists only in her head.That is why it was easy for her to get pregnant for another man.

Now guilt and regret is not going to help here because the deed has been done is manifest.
Who knows what the guy has been up to for the 2 years anyway? Could he have impregnanted a girl? he is a man rem.
Well here is what,They both failed, but heavy responsibility lies on the girl cz she's soon going to be a mother!

You still haven't answered my question though.What is the second guy's position on this? Is he willing to marry her? Has he accepted responsibility?
Do they have a good relationship going on? Does he know about the first guy and the engagement? His stand?
Another angle to it is this,even though I blame lack of communication here. If one can be unfaithful during the engagement period to the extent of getting pregnant/sleeping around in case of a guy,how much more when she/he marries?

Anyway always put measures in place to safeguard or forget about long distance all together

Thanks for your contribution.The second guy has accepted responsibility and is ready to marry her.he knew about the engagement and everything that happened later but he went ahead in the relationship when the lady said his mind off the first guy.the relationship is great and the lady is not even ready to lose him.thanks for your contribution.

Ok then tell her to stop acting silly.
Break the engagement and move on.