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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores (20868 Views)
Why Struggle With Domestic Chores? / Dear Nigerian Men That Don't Help With Housework, / How Do Career Women Cope With Domestic Chores? - Help! (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Eneze1(f): 4:25pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
bjcole: @ Op, i hope u r not looking 4 trouble, these women will attack u, hope u r ready? Well to answer ur question, doing a house chores is not a big deal, its ur house, when both husband & wife join hands together, the tasks become easier, however u dont take a house chores as a responbility u share wit ur wife, it shoud be out of freewill, u ve ur major financial roles to take care. what if financial roles are carried by both the husband and the wife? |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Nobody: 4:35pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
coogar: chai! I di egwu!! **topic is overheatn d polity. Runs for cover** |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Nobody: 4:45pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
greatgod2012: I intentionally ignored this thread, because, i knew its going to turn into war zone. shikina! THREAD CLOSED! |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Nobody: 4:48pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
fellis: I had wanted to reply the above post but after reading greadgod's comment and this part of coogar's post why are u taking this personal? Does it...? |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Akiika: 5:42pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
You guys should go and read this awakening piece by Prof. Pius Akinasanmi, rather than posting things that are not beneficial to an average brain dead Nigeria http://saharareporters.com/column/2015-i-endorse-you-spectocrat-pius-adesanmi |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Nobody: 5:51pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Now i understand why most Nigerian women look like their husbands' mothers! By the time she wakes up at 5am, makes breakfast for the kids and hubby, packs the children's lunch boxes and gets the children ready for school, then she goes to work and returns back home to help the kids with assignments, make dinner and still prepare for bed action o boy and there she must give an A performance also. Those woman will definitely look twice the age of her mates who have caring husbands that pitch in. Even if she has a maid she must still supervise all house chores and do the cooking herself and yes she mustn't forget to get an ugly maid o, so she won't take her husband...lol Then when the man starts following young girls he'll have the usual excuse of how she let herself go...smh 1 Like |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by oradee: 5:53pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
many men comment bout protecting and providing financially yet i know quite a number of men whose wife pays partly/fully the rents, takes up either dstv/fuel bills,clothing for the kids sometimes,etc...how much do all men earn that they brag bout their financial role? yet whether u earn a monthly paycheck or not (salary workers),whether u look for contracts and u find or not, ualways expect a home cooked meal,neat appartment and a home u can go to,yet all she asks for is assistance...not thats shes tranfering her responsibiliies permanatly to u... |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by dayokanu(m): 6:18pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
If we share financial responsibilities then we would share domestic responsibilities |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by omiobo: 6:20pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
bukatyne: Lol at strategising? @no 4, you don't expect your wife to contribute at all? I don't expect but she can if she feels like. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by akino(m): 7:26pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
bukatyne: I don't want to attack you but ask some honest questions:Honestly i dont believe my wife should play any active role in meeting d needs of the family.she can support willingly and no offence if doesnt. I like helping out with the chores but i cant take it as responsibility. When we both came back from work tired and worn out,tea and bread may be the best option.If this continues for a week, we will decide if i must eat out everyday or not. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Metallurgist: 7:34pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
If men ar men then women wont bother men about housework, if the man is solely responsible for his house financially, then women will not hav any excuse to bother him and house house will be optional, but in a situation where the wife contribute financially, then the burden should be shared |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by akino(m): 7:40pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
oradee: many men comment bout protecting and providing financially yet i know quite a number of men whose wife pays partly/fully the rents, takes up either dstv/fuel bills,clothing for the kids sometimes,etc...how much do all men earn that they brag bout their financial role? |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Nobody: 7:52pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
lukaino: I think one should help out of one's free will.maybe she should also cook at free will...if she isn't hungry and u are, maybe u shud cook ur own damn breakfast . Sounds fair to me |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by rushda29: 7:55pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
lukaino: Many times we hear women complain about men not helping out with any of the domestic chores and people are quick to conclude that such men are wicked and insensitive. I think men have reasons for not helping out. Mine for example is that all the times i tried to help out with something, my wife automatically makes it my duty every other time; she'll even remind me when i don't do it. I think one should help out of one's free will. Guys what are your reasons? I actually wanted to avoid it because although I'm a very traditional woman, I think that a man should help sometimes. And sometimes appreciating the woman is help enuff. I don't mean sitting on a chair and saying "you're doing a good job honey." But staying with her in the kitchen, chatting with her while she works. Keeping her company and helping her to get things from the cupboard and helping in cleaning up. Or setting the table. 2 Likes |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by tunapawizzy: 8:22pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
ledynamite: [size=16pt] most naija men are lazy!!!!. smh once they get married they dont wanna do anything again!!! while the wife is cooking,scrubbing,cleaning,washing,backing the baby,assisting the family financially,feeding and bathing the baby, arranging the house! washing the man boxers!!! what a typical naija man wants to do is eat,picking his teeth and fart!!! [/size]will u marry me i'll so pamper u |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by MissIfe(f): 8:32pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
dayokanu: If we share financial responsibilities then we would share domestic responsibilities Marry me, I'd leave my husband for you Seriously, we both work full time, we bring in more or less the same money BUT I have a second job i'm not paid for, which is cleaning, cooking, taking care of the kids, running errands... I wouldn't leave my husband because of that, but I am way less tolerant to any other flaw because I consider that i contribute more than him to the home. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by coogar: 8:40pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Miss_Ife: why don't you hire a housemaid? |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by dayokanu(m): 8:42pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Miss_Ife: Oya coogar can you be the officiating minister and lets do this thing Kpa kpa kpa |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by MissIfe(f): 8:44pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
coogar: Because we live in the west and it is way too expensive. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by coogar: 8:53pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
dayokanu: i will not join you in matrimony with someone else's wife. Miss_Ife: $15 per hour is expensive? she comes on a friday/saturday and she cleans the house thoroughly(for 3-4 hrs). it would be a weekly appointment and since you live with your hubby alone, i really don't think the house would be that untidy. hire a maid and save yourself the stress. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by dealslip(f): 8:55pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
HARDDON: |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by MissIfe(f): 8:58pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
coogar: We have kids. when it was only the two of us it wasn't a big deal. And yes, $15*4hrs*4weeks -> $240 a month, IS expensive. Unless [i]he [/i]pays for it with his own money. or at least for half of it. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by coogar: 9:02pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Miss_Ife: $240/month shouldn't be expensive if the two of you are into full-time employment. of course, he would be willing to pay 75% upwards of the cost of hiring a maid. a less-stressed wife is a bonus! |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by MissIfe(f): 9:09pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
coogar: Well, I've budgeted it, and as long as we pay for daycare/nanny, housemaid would take too much of our savings. I'd rather save up for my kids' future than pay for an help that wouldn't be necessary if we both took our responsibilities as adults and parents. I mean, if he offered to reduce his personal expenses to pay for an housemaid, I would probably agree, but things being the way they are, I will not push him to do it. That being said, figures thrown by nairalanders living in the west always surprise me, nobody I know around me has enough money to pay for a housemaid, and most of my friends/family are into full-time employment with kids, and I don't mean minimum-wage jobs. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by Nobody: 9:17pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
ledynamite: [size=16pt] what a typical naija man wants to do is eat,picking his teeth and fart!!! [/size]lmao |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by coogar: 9:21pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Miss_Ife: well - you would know your husband more. as for me, i told my spouse time is money too. the time i am using to babysit or do some needless chores can be used to make more money so why not pay for an au pair. i am extremely social and i would not be shackled by domestic chores - so i pay my way out to go see friends or watch an opera!
nigerians in the west especially the woman would never see the need to hire domestic hands to help them out because they always convert any cost to naira and they always feel they can take on the task - only to complain later. i am kitchen-lazy and time spent in the kitchen can be used for other things. why should i spend 1hr in the kitchen to make a meal for 2 people when i can easily order readymade food and use my time judiciously. i can pay as much as $1000/month for housekeeping. having worked monday till friday, saturday n sunday are the only days left for me to rest - domestic chores won't steal that little time away from me. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by toluene12: 9:23pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
coogar:except they are a upper middle class family, $240/month is good money that could go into other meaningful things other than wasting it on housemaid (particularly if they reside in u.k). Besides she still has to manage daily domestic chores which is actually the real work. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by coogar: 9:27pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
toluene12: you would get a good housekeeper in the uk for £11/hr. uk houses are very small - if she's not an obese heifer, she should be completing her task within 2 hrs and i mean white glove test performance! |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by ocelot2006(m): 9:48pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
fellis: Point of correction. It is NOT my duty to help out with house chores, especially when I'm the one that slaves all day to bring home the bacon. But I don't mind helping out my wife from time to time, especially when she has her hands full. |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by temhab(f): 10:18pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Eti fa were loy.... |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by loswhite(m): 10:31pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
fellis:u r not oblige to follow them. After all u can provide 4 d family n let ur man take care of d family |
Re: Why Men Don't Help-Out With Domestic Chores by loswhite(m): 10:41pm On Jan 15, 2013 |
Ujujoan: Aaaaaaaagaaaaaaaaaaain!d poster did not say he doesn't like helping his wife. he js don't want her to impose d chores on him as a duty |
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