Pls I need ur advice, After some bad experience durin my childhood which change me totally, and gave me bad impression abt men I decided 2 give datin a chance, so I met dis man, he is so luvly, he is d only person dat has respected me as a lady, and dis made me hv feelings 4 him, I love him so much. Things was going fine btw us, but suddenly everytin changed, he doesn't pick my call or eve reply my call, we I confronted him, he gave me so reasons dat are nt genue, and I even found a used condom in his room, but he told me it was use by his frnd, I don't knw who to believe, I so much luv dis man, dat I can stay 4 a year without hvin anytin to do wit any man, I don't fancy any man except him. With his previous attitude, I believe he is seeing some1 else, What should I do nw? Pls help me out wit ur advise.

He's tired of the relationship. I'm sorry

The used condoms were used by his friend? Right. If a guy tells me one bullsh!t lie like that, we would over and done with right there. Based on what you wrote, he's no longer interested: him not picking your calls, not bothering to reply and creeping around. Forget him, girl. A guy who's truly interested in you will not be treating you like this.

I am more interested in knowing what he was doing with used condoms in the house.

Move on without him...the right guy is looking for you.

@Mynd44, is nt dat he is using it 4 any harmful tin, but he 4got 2 dispose dem b4 my arrival, because I hv neva check is tins b4, so he neva thought I wil go 2 dat length. I guess d used condoms, were his dat he fail 2 dispose, and notin more.

so u want advice for...

Samegirl: @Mynd44, is nt dat he is using it 4 any harmful tin, but he 4got 2 dispose dem b4 my arrival, because I hv neva check is tins b4, so he neva thought I wil go 2 dat length. I guess d used condoms, were his dat he fail 2 dispose, and notin more.

Erm.....who does not dispose condoms properly biko? That shows a lot about his hygeine. Ewww

The only tyn i hate about nairalander is that they encourage pple to break-up. Whats wrong with you guys?? Tell her things that will make her change her man's mind, nt break up all d time..
Mehn... Dis tyn don dey tire me ooo

It's either you persevere while hoping for a change or you bounce. These are the 2 options you have. How strong are you?

digitalgeorgy: The only tyn i hate about nairalander is that they encourage pple to break-up. Whats wrong with you guys?? Tell her things that will make her change her man's mind, nt break up all d time..
Mehn... Dis tyn don dey tire me ooo

Since you know better, why don't you tell us then? What are these things she should do or say to change her man's mind? A man who refuses to pick up her calls, call her back and who's sleeping around. Don't tell me you believe that excuse that the condoms were his friend's! Do you let your own friends have s.ex in your bedroom? I hope not! Would you advise your little sister to stay with a man who treats her like this? C'mon now.

Samegirl you have to move on, the man is tired of u or you gave him too much reason to behave that way by given him too much confidence that he is the only man in d world.
Babygirl try and let him know that he is not, through ur actions and stop playing victim it makes u venerable in love game.

digitalgeorgy: The only tyn i hate about nairalander is that they encourage pple to break-up. Whats wrong with you guys?? Tell her things that will make her change her man's mind, nt break up all d time..
Mehn... Dis tyn don dey tire me ooo

na true you talk sha

Mynd_44: I am more interested in knowing what he was doing with used condoms in the house.

I find that disturbing as well.

Adaeze003:
I find that disturbing as well.

Me too ooo

@mynd 44 and Adaeze, dere is notin 2 it, I rili don't like d way u view dis tin, I only ask 4 advice 4rm u.

Mynd_44: I am more interested in knowing what he was doing with used condoms in the house.

Hahahaha, he m-a-s-t-u-r-b-a't-e-d with them

But seriously, how naïve could a girl be? With all the signs there, you still can't read the handwriting on the wall? Let me help:. . .

"Maene maene, your boyfriend has lost interest in you".

Samegirl: @mynd 44 and Adaeze, dere is notin 2 it, I rili don't like d way u view dis tin, I only ask 4 advice 4rm u.

Whaaaat?? There's nothing to a used condom in your bf's room? Soon you will see a naked girl on his bed and he'll tell you its a leftover of his friend's.
Seriously, you don't need an advice, you need a whooping!!!!

Samegirl: @mynd 44 and Adaeze, dere is notin 2 it, I rili don't like d way u view dis tin, I only ask 4 advice 4rm u.

What did I do? I am just helping you see thing better

Mazi_Omenuko:
Whaaaat?? There's nothing to a used condom in your bf's room? Soon you will see a naked girl on his bed and he'll tell you its a leftover of his friend's.
Seriously, you don't need an advice, you need a whooping!!!!

Wicked

With his present behaviour towards you, i sugest you start ignoring him, stop calling or visiting him. Even if he calls, don't pick..
If he still loves you, he will become worried and come back.. If he doesn't, just forget him and move on as if he doesn't exist..


Never give a guy the opportunity to play with your emotions..
Retain your dignity

Op, how old is this relationship?

Samegirl: @mynd 44 and Adaeze, dere is notin 2 it, I rili don't like d way u view dis tin, I only ask 4 advice 4rm u.

#No pun intended.
My advice? Well I agree with Nnekacherry. "If you love him,set him free. If he returns he's yours and if he doesn't he never was!"

swithrt....u knw he is behavin lik an as*hole and u stil askin wat to do?
no1 deserves to b treatd lik sh*t dear, beta stay single dan manage a failed relationshp galffrnd!
forgt him and go catch some1 out thr hu ll put smiles on ur face jor

@op. Do you value your peace and happiness? If YES, you should know what to do without asking

DigitalSignal: Op, how old is this relationship?

. Just 2yrs

Thanks a lot 4 ur advise, and 4 makin me strong, towards my present situation. Indeed a problem shared is a problem solve. Luv u all.

Nnekacherry: With his present behaviour towards you, i sugest you start ignoring him, stop calling or visiting him. Even if he calls, don't pick..
If he still loves you, he will become worried and come back.. If he doesn't, just forget him and move on as if he doesn't exist..


Never give a guy the opportunity to play with your emotions..
Retain your dignity

The best advice so far.
@op, don't mind all these faceless Landlords and Landladies here. Sometimes I wonder if some pple here sleep and wake up on Nairaland without a job in the real world! Hmmm....

baibijay@yahoo.:
swithrt....u knw he is behavin lik an as*hole and u stil askin wat to do?
no1 deserves to b treatd lik sh*t dear, beta stay single dan manage a failed relationshp galffrnd!
forgt him and go catch some1 out thr hu ll put smiles on ur face jor

Did u say go and catch someone out there? hahaha as if it's was easy and we have a whole lots single everywher..

^^lol,dnt b xo mean.

chikeorji123:

Did u say go and catch someone out there? hahaha as if it's was easy and we have a whole lots single everywher..

v.Easy dear, ladies knw wat ah min.

Samegirl: . Just 2yrs

Two years is enough for a guy who's serious to define his relationship! You see, my dear, there is a price for everything given in excess of demand! From what I can undersand, you probably, must have given him more than what is required at this stage! You probably made him feel he was everything and your life depended on him! You may have even appeared desperate, and he's now feeling being cornered! In the game of love, before you tie the knot, you make your man desire you, you make him want to keep you by his side, and this, you can achieve by maintaining some level of independence! Don't make yourself appear vulnerable to a man! Now, it appears he's having a second thought about continuing the relationship and if you continue confronting him physically, it's likely not to yield any positive result. He's an adult, I suppose; We humans tend to have little value for that which is readily available! Try to create some scarcity around him; give him the time he needs to re-evaluate his feelings for you; don't call him and don't go to his place! I appreciate the difficulty of what I'm saying but, dear, you can't force him; you can only play mental games with him! I advice that you look outside, get some male friends to create that feeling in him that he's gradually losing you to someone else. Look happy and behave as if you're just starting life!
If he calls you at the end of the day, pick his call and try to know why he is calling. If he wants you to come to his place so you can talk, don't appear desperate to have him back; sound indifferent and tell him politely that you can't come to his house, that rather he should arrange for a neutral place or he could even come to your house if it's convenient! If he doesn't come back, cheer up and move on; put the past behind and let go! And again, change your perception about men and face reality. Every man can't be the same. Wish you good luck!