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Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:42am On Mar 30, 2013 |
davidylan:Good boy |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by rhymz(m): 5:49am On Mar 30, 2013 |
two of una need a room jor! |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:53am On Mar 30, 2013 |
I dey go sleep jare shior!! |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by rhymz(m): 5:54am On Mar 30, 2013 |
carefreewannabe: I would definitely have some back-up and my hubby would know about it. There is no way for me to accept another wife in my house and no way for me to leave my earnings for another wife. I have been working hard, I have a lot to bring into marriage and I will make sure no other woman, who wants to sleep with my husband, will profit from my hard earned money, house and car.pre-nups in Naija. . Lol. . I don hear you o. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 8:21am On Mar 30, 2013 |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by damiso(f): 1:36pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
chaircover: Been off NL in a while been swamped that right now i am still in bed at Noon am so tired .But CC ur so spot on as usual.The best inheritance ever is a good education and upbringing.I know loads of people who neglect this vital part of a child's life to compete with their husbands for what i.dont know?I keep saying it whats the use of all the mansions in Lekki if the child who will inherit it is uhhhm something else.Not saying that mansions in Lekki are bad o but do kids really need mummy mansion and Daddy's mansion?I agree with jidegirl that certain investments should be in the kids names and for me all those investments sef are to pay for a good education.Life really is not that hard ojere. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 1:42pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
rhymz: pre-nups in Naija. . Lol. . I don hear you o. I am well aware that is not practiced in Naija. That doesn't mean that I can't favor this idea. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 1:52pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
chaircover: What if you become three because your hubby decides to take in another wife? I agree with you that education and happy upbringing for children is the most important thing. And I agree when you say that there is no sense in having several mansions. But I don't agree when you say "I'm not going to kill myself over something that hasn't happened and may never happen." It's not about killing oneself. It's about you as a woman being independent no matter what. Yes, you and your husband are one but you don't know tomorrow. So when husband and wife both work, it's no longer my husband's house as Nigerians like to say but OURS and he alone doesn't decide who is going to live with us. This was how the thread started. It was initially inspired by the story of a woman who couldn't handle a second wife. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by bebe2(f): 1:55pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
davidylan: i am not a stranger to nigeria, i was born there and only left becos i married someone who lived abroad. we re just having a civilised debate. things like this happen i have seen it with my two eyes. dont come and act likeam making things up or am trying to stir up trouble in pple's home. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 2:08pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
bebe2: Another drama queen responding to a post that wasnt directed at her. Please take a quick check, the post you are quoting and having an enema over was SPECIFICALLY directed at a comment jidegirl made about nigeria being backward. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by 7842I: 2:09pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
bebe2: You are definitely pouring fuel on people's homes. You cannot throw a blanket advice to the public because of the unfortunate experiences of a single lady. You act like you are the one that wants a break, maybe you have found a younger man? 1 Like |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by bebe2(f): 2:15pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
carefreewannabe: i agree, with both points. i pray dis neva happens to any of us, it may sound like am a bad wife and dnt luv my hubby etc. dats far from the truth, yes i did buy a house, but its not a mansion it a 3 bed bungalow, i used my son as next of kin. if it all goes wonky at least i wont be homeless. if it goes well it hus a plus 1 to our properties. this is for my own peace of mind. i will tell hubby wen i fell comfortable to tell him. if i wanted to retire and remain here dats fine,i know am covered wateva happen but i want to go back home wen my kids become adults. as for the lady, we decided to call the hubby and ask him since they are friends of ours, the man is playing the victim. " ask ur friend if i drove her out, ask her if she was ever insulted by her junior wife, how can she leave her home for another woman" i was shocked he doesnt seem to realise how much he has hurt his woman. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by bebe2(f): 2:20pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
wit all the small small insult i get in this forum an addicted i cant stop. moderator, dis is a serious matter o, oya front page nah can i say dis is not about house, maybe little saving from ur salary or money hidden under ur mattress |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by coogar: 2:56pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
bebe2: ok, this is something that has been causing trouble btw husband and wives especially in d diaspora. i will give u a quick story so u can understand my point. orishirishi on nairaland.... while you are at it, you might as well buy a gold-plated casket and a grave in abuja to secure your final place of rest. only people with backward reasoning can bother about building a house in my name or my wife's name.........who is going to live in those houses people build here n there? by 21, my kids should be out of the house to build their own future. nigerians should move past all these "na me get am property". |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 3:04pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
coogar: lol |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by 7842I: 3:22pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
coogar: Loll, and they can start paying grave diggers and ambulance service since they already conclude they will be dumped and lonely in later years. Women with this type of mentality carry on with troublesome manners in present marriages |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 3:40pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
7842I: I don't get why you feel so bad about a woman having financial securities Don't you want to have a working wife who has her own? If no is your answer, fine with me, have a stay at home wife, nothing bad about it. To each his own BUT I have been working hard in my life and I have something to bring into marriage. So whatever I and my husband will have is OURS. If anything happens, nobody will have to ask me what I brought into our marriage, they will know. Does it come as a surprise to you that many wives in Nigeria ended up miserable in their later years? I have seen plenty of them. They turned 40 or 50 and their husbands brought new wives home, young enough to be their daughters. Are women supposed to like it Nigerians always say, go to your husband's house. Why is it HIS house? Isn't it our and our children's home? See, my parents educated me well and made sure I graduate from a good university so that I'm useful. Therefore, it will NEVER be my husband's house, it will be OUR house. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by 7842I: 3:50pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
carefreewannabe: I am sure you will not take my advice but I will drop it all the same. Work hard with your husband and entrust all your earnings with him for a combined investment with his own earnings. You two can also build together, anytime you cannot trust your husband, divorce him and go your way. Men are not monsters, they know what yr efforts are and will appreciate it if you show yourself to be open and trustworthy. Will he stray? Sometimes, will he give you reasons to doubt him? Many times. But never give up, build the relationship and put everything in the hands of God (if you believe in him) If you start to act defensively in a marriage, chances are that your man will notice and in turn start acting defensively too, seeking love and trust from outside. In conclusion, men may bring in another woman later, but when you look into it, the wife contributed to it. Maybe she put her career before her husband? Or was selfish with her earnings. Think about this. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 4:05pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
7842I: Thank you for your advice but you must confess that you are being very opportunistic. I don't blame you, we all are. And as you are a man, you will naturally say: 1. You as a woman have to entrust your earnings with him. (Would you entrust your earnings with your wife?) 2. Even when he gives you reasons to doubt him many times, never give up. (Would you do the same for your wife?) 3. Those men who bring in second or third or fourth wives do it 'cause women made them do it. (Do you really like this victim mentality? And don't you think women have enough reasons too to search for love, affection and attention outside?) Look, I don't want to build a house alone and never behind my husband's back. All that I'm saying is that I'm able to contribute a lot and therefore will never accept a second wife, let alone leave my house for her like the woman in the poster's story did. Why? Because I built it TOGETHER with my husband. I will protect it with all means possible. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 4:33pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
I secured my future before I got married. I have my career, house, investment, pension, savings that will last me after my retirement. Now we are together, we make our plans together for the benefit of us and the kids. He knows I have these things and he is not in any way asking about next of kin etc..funny enough most of the deeds and savings still have my dad and sister as next of kin. Thanks for this, I will start the process of changing it to ......emmm...my kid, which will be used as a guarantee for their education if all other option fails. As for hubby, we are building together now we are together, what ever he has before he met me, I couldn't care about that...he can as well change the next of kin to our kids .... Am not afraid of the future anyway, am too fortified to be! If all fails, I can go back to my village and live happily with 1 dollar per day, cos I am a bit of both worlds I always find a way to be happy and enjoy my life in every condition. Above all, all is vanity! 1 Like |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by 7842I: 4:40pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
carefreewannabe: Well, this is the internet where every body can claim anything. But in real life, all my property are domiciled in my wives accounts, including all lump sums. Whenever I want to start a new project, I just ask that she transfer so so and so amout into my company account. She is 100% trustworthy, and have never spent $1 without my consent. I know many people will still doubt me sha. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 4:41pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
"Why? Because I built it TOGETHER with my husband. I will protect it with all means possible". Gbam!!!my kInda girl. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:41pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
bebe2: ok, this is something that has been causing trouble btw husband and wives especially in d diaspora. i will give u a quick story so u can understand my point. Let me guess, the perpetrator is a yoruba man! This is one thing I dislike about those people . . . their inability to keep 'the other woman' away. Igbo women don't usually worry about thing like that because a real igbo man knows how to chop and clean mouth! Any Igbo woman dating a married man knows she's not going to last, sooner or later he's going to dump her for the next available chick. But a Yoruba man will get her pregnant and then go ahead to bring her into the home as a second wife, tufiakwa! 2 Likes |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by coogar: 5:43pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
Ujujoan: stunning! |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:45pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
coogar: You are being myopic as usual . . . this is NOT just about fighting for property, it's about preventing those greedy people from reaping where they dis not sow! After years of deprivation and hard work, another woman comes from no where to take over? That's enough to drive anybody insane! |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by coogar: 5:50pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
Ujujoan: take over what exactly? i work everyday, my wife works too. she has got her savings account - if i kick the bucket, my family would take over her savings account? this village mentality is the reason nigeria is where it is today.......people like you who spent more than 20 years receiving formal education are even helping to fuel the razz mentality! if you don't trust your husband not to marry a second wife then you shouldn't have married him or you must be daft to have married him. instead of you stooges to concentrate on other important things, putting names on the certificate of ownership is your problem - may God help the average nigerian woman........ |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:52pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
coogar: What Are you going to turn what I just said into some tribalistic comment |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by coogar: 5:55pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
Ujujoan: sip some water and read the drivel you typed again.... it's fair to say the formal education you took all these years has done nothing to improve you. 2 Likes |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:55pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
coogar: Sheeh . . . save that crap for that gullible chick you plan to make your wife! Even if it's an old rickety car, I'm not about to let it go to some husband snatcher . . . suck on it! As for the husband who (God forbid) decides to marry another wife, he's free to, but not with my hard earned money! If that makes me a local Nigerian villager, then so be it! |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by Nobody: 5:57pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
coogar: At least I can pick out fakers like you from the crowd . . . If that's all the 'formal education' has helped me do, I'll say it has done enof! |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by 7842I: 5:58pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
Ujujoan: True, the Igbo man will pay raw cash, chop and clean mouth and if you near his family, he is dumping your butt immediately. The Igbo values their family. |
Re: Women: Have U Secured Your Future? by coogar: 5:59pm On Mar 30, 2013 |
Ujujoan: you married the wrong man then.....you are doing the equivalent of a man that wants to join the church of helen akpabio in case his wife or his female child becomes a witch later in future. that's how daft the idea sounds.
you are a villager...... Ujujoan: you are the faker..... women like you come to the cyberspace to claim lara croft and yet you are a subservient wife.......how are we even sure you are not a 2nd or 3rd wife sef who cannot even contribute your opinion in family meetings? 1 Like |
Pls I Need Your Sincere Advise. / I won't marry you cos your mother has "Cancer" / Have Begged Her To Leave My House, She Does Not. Now She Has Missed Her Period
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