Just about everyone I know of has cheated or betrayed someone who was under the impression that you would not be intimate with anyone other then them.
I'm doing a little research on this subject and would like to know the circumstances that led you to cheat!

We live in an age where cheating is more prevalent than ever before thanks in part to internet dating sites, working long hours with the opposite sex, a pop culture that down plays the significance of being monogamous and in fact encourages people to cheat by describing the thrill of it all in songs, movies, and magazine articles.
We don’t hold cheating against icons such as John F. Kennedy,
Martin Luther King, Bill Clinton, Michael Jordan, or Brad Pitt.
In fact most of us know someone who is cheating or has cheated on someone and we still remain close trusted friends with him or her. In fact many of us have cheated ourselves.
The only time cheating really upsets us is when we have been cheated on.

Cheating is one of those things that most of us have one definition for when we are engaged in secret activity and another definition for it when it’s our partner that is engaged in the same activity.

I'm not out to judge anyone after all I too have cheated.
I just want to get as many reasons why other people have done it.
Besides answering the big WHY question I would be curious to know if you got caught and if so did your primary relationship end.

What is cheating?

The best answer I have ever heard to define cheating came from an Older Lady sometimes ago
She said, “If you are saying or doing something with someone that you would not say or do if your spouse or partner were sitting next to you then you are cheating.” People, who have nothing to hide, hide nothing.

In essence cheating is having a secret relationship or participating in secret activities with someone that your partner would not approve of.The key word is “secret”.The cheater doesn’t want his/her mate to know what they are doing.

Filling In The Gaps

One of the most common questions asked of cheaters is why didn’t they just leave their mate before pursuing another relationship?

As you will see the reasons vary from person to person.
One common theme seems to be that cheaters often appreciate many aspects of their present relationship and they are simply looking to “fill in the missing gap”

The following are some “gap examples”



Appreciation/Affection Gap

A husband no longer gives his wife attention nor makes her feel special.
She has gained some weight over the years.
She is the maid, the cook, the sex object, mother, and feels taken for granted
Her husband rarely pays her a compliment or makes an effort infuse romance into their relationship by showing her his appreciation with a night out on the town, flowers, cards, or even giving her a hug or kiss out of the blue.

One day she is at work, church, or at the grocery store and a man sincerely compliments her. Overtime a friendship develops and this man begins to fill in the gaps by being attentive to her needs, listening to her, and eventually “one thing leads to another”.

Sexual Gap

A woman is an excellent mother, a wonderful companion, and is loved by everyone who knows her.
However she has a low sex drive, rarely initiates sex, and does not perform MouthAction nor is she open to experimenting with fantasies be it unique locations to make love or wearing sexy underwear.
Her husband meanwhile secretly wishes for a passionate relationship with his wife but past conversations have produced little to no results.
He knows he has good wife and doesn’t want to trade her in for anything however he is dreadfully bored.
One day he is patrolling some internet sites where women are openly stating they are looking for casual sexual encounters, or he is going to happy hours after work, attending a company Christmas party, traveling out of town with a female business associate…etc
Eventually he meets a woman who is nothing like his wife.
In short she is a sexual freak who does it all and wants it all with no strings attached.
The husband now feels he has the best of both worlds.

I personally knew of one man who secretly paid prostitutes for MouthAction on a weekly basis because his wife would not perform it on him.

There are other times when “sexual gaps” have nothing to do with frequency of sex or even the willingness of a partner to participate in various activities.

A woman marries a man who is financially secure; he is intelligent, responsible, handsome, and very generous and sincerely dedicated to making her happy.
However she is rarely able to reach orgasm with him regardless of his efforts.
It may be his penis size, lack of raw passion in his approach, or simply there is no chemistry or sparks.
She often fantasizes about a hot & torrid relationship she had with a man from her past that rocked her world but he lacked every other component to make a lasting loving relationship.

One day she bumps into him at a grocery store or while visiting a mutual friend.
Their eyes connect and it’s apparent for both of them that the sparks are still there.
He walks her to her car and “one thing leads to another”

Another version of this same story is she meets a stranger who turns her on or he is a co-worker that has appeared in her fantasies and an opportunity presents itself.

Lastly there is the “Something New” sexual gap.

Femi and Rolake have been married for five years.
Rolake does everything Femi wants in bed and rarely turns him down.
Outside of the bedroom she has a solid career and is loved and respected by everyone.
Just as in the earlier example she is an excellent homemaker, fantastic cook, in addition she very intelligent, adventurous, and works out to keep her body toned.
And yet Femi has secretly been cheating on Rolake for all five years!
He knows he has a great thing but his urge for “new adventures” motivates his cheating.
In his mind there is no substitute for “something new” or more importantly
“Someone new”.
Femi is not interested in having “an affair” he wants to have his anchor at home while he seduces and sleeps with as many women of various races, ages, sizes, shapes, as often as possible. Femi is essentially a married playboy.
Men like Femi are usually considered handsome, have a magnetic personality, great sense of humor, and flirt constantly.
Both men and women consider him fun to be around.
In fact in most instances Femi doesn’t bother with hiding the fact that he is married.
Women gravitate to him despite knowing he isn’t suitable mate.
As the song goes.

why do YOU cheat not why do WE cheat.i ve neva done dat nd i will neva.

welli:

why do YOU cheat not why do WE cheat.i ve never done that nd i will never.

:Dmmmmh

ernal:

The following are some “gap examples”



Appreciation/Affection Gap

A husband no longer gives his wife attention nor makes her feel special.
She has gained some weight over the years.
She is the maid, the cook, the sex object, mother, and feels taken for granted
Her husband rarely pays her a compliment or makes an effort infuse romance into their relationship by showing her his appreciation with a night out on the town, flowers, cards, or even giving her a hug or kiss out of the blue.

One day she is at work, church, or at the grocery store and a man sincerely compliments her. Overtime a friendship develops and this man begins to fill in the gaps by being attentive to her needs, listening to her, and eventually “one thing leads to another”.

Sexual Gap

A woman is an excellent mother, a wonderful companion, and is loved by everyone who knows her.
However she has a low sex drive, rarely initiates sex, and does not perform MouthAction nor is she open to experimenting with fantasies be it unique locations to make love or wearing sexy underwear.
Her husband meanwhile secretly wishes for a passionate relationship with his wife but past conversations have produced little to no results.
He knows he has good wife and doesn’t want to trade her in for anything however he is dreadfully bored.
One day he is patrolling some internet sites where women are openly stating they are looking for casual sexual encounters, or he is going to happy hours after work, attending a company Christmas party, traveling out of town with a female business associate…etc
Eventually he meets a woman who is nothing like his wife.
In short she is a sexual freak who does it all and wants it all with no strings attached.
The husband now feels he has the best of both worlds.

I personally knew of one man who secretly paid prostitutes for MouthAction on a weekly basis because his wife would not perform it on him.

There are other times when “sexual gaps” have nothing to do with frequency of sex or even the willingness of a partner to participate in various activities.

A woman marries a man who is financially secure; he is intelligent, responsible, handsome, and very generous and sincerely dedicated to making her happy.
However she is rarely able to reach orgasm with him regardless of his efforts.
It may be his privates size, lack of raw passion in his approach, or simply there is no chemistry or sparks.
She often fantasizes about a hot & torrid relationship she had with a man from her past that rocked her world but he lacked every other component to make a lasting loving relationship.

One day she bumps into him at a grocery store or while visiting a mutual friend.
Their eyes connect and it’s apparent for both of them that the sparks are still there.
He walks her to her car and “one thing leads to another”

Another version of this same story is she meets a stranger who turns her on or he is a co-worker that has appeared in her fantasies and an opportunity presents itself.

Lastly there is the “Something New” sexual gap.

Femi and Rolake have been married for five years.
Rolake does everything Femi wants in bed and rarely turns him down.
Outside of the bedroom she has a solid career and is loved and respected by everyone.
Just as in the earlier example she is an excellent homemaker, fantastic cook, in addition she very intelligent, adventurous, and works out to keep her body toned.
And yet Femi has secretly been cheating on Rolake for all five years!
He knows he has a great thing but his urge for “new adventures” motivates his cheating.
In his mind there is no substitute for “something new” or more importantly
“Someone new”.
Femi is not interested in having “an affair” he wants to have his anchor at home while he seduces and sleeps with as many women of various races, ages, sizes, shapes, as often as possible. Femi is essentially a married playboy.
Men like Femi are usually considered handsome, have a magnetic personality, great sense of humor, and flirt constantly.
Both men and women consider him fun to be around.
In fact in most instances Femi doesn’t bother with hiding the fact that he is married.
Women gravitate to him despite knowing he isn’t suitable mate.
As the song goes.

ernal:

What is cheating?

The best answer I have ever heard to define cheating came from an Older Lady sometimes ago
She said, “If you are saying or doing something with someone that you would not say or do if your spouse or partner were sitting next to you then you are cheating.” People, who have nothing to hide, hide nothing.

In essence cheating is having a secret relationship or participating in secret activities with someone that your partner would not approve of.The key word is “secret”.The cheater doesn’t want his/her mate to know what they are doing.

Filling In The Gaps

One of the most common questions asked of cheaters is why didn’t they just leave their mate before pursuing another relationship?

As you will see the reasons vary from person to person.
One common theme seems to be that cheaters often appreciate many aspects of their present relationship and they are simply looking to “fill in the missing gap”

You'v said it all. I gs there's no more to say. Hv never cheated on my girlfriend sexually but I gs she may hv a problem wv my relationships wv my female friends even dou there's nofin no hide

Welli,i know at least most of us have cheated before we you havent,

you've given most of d reasons above. some do it for fun, adventure, variety, etc just 2 name a few

Ojukokoro!!

I can't say for others, but I hate the idea of cheating. Since I can't forgive being cheated on, I try as much never to cheat no matter the circumstances.

Thye day I cheat is the day I am paying a visit to a psychiatric hospital!

michelin89:

I can't say for others, but I hate the idea of cheating. Since I can't forgive being cheated on, I try as much never to cheat no matter the circumstances.

Thye day I cheat is the day I am paying a visit to a psychiatric hospital!

Neva say Neva!

ernal tnk GOD u knw i ven't. so u should ve used why do some of us and not why do we.its drags d names of d faithful ones like me in da mud

How many cheating thread? Nlers , you guys are boring o. se emo ju cheating ni? abeg! People you're sickening

welli:

why do YOU cheat not why do WE cheat.i ve never done that nd i will never.

spot on. Now thats the question you suppose to be asking oga poster.

somethin gotta give!

Busta:

Neva say Neva!

I don't exclude the possibility. but if I should, I really hope it won't be more than once if not I am moving to the psychiatric hospital permanently. I don't think anyone psychologically sane would cheat repeatedly!

if your partner changes

simply bcus him or her changes is nt a justified reason to cheat

Don't you know that stolen water, taste the sweetest?

People cheat due to different reasons some either the partner is not satisfying sexually, others cheat because there partner can not satisfy them monetarily and others cheat because they are caused it is in their blood they can't help it.

when there is true love, there is nothing like cheating.
cheating is out of love to me.
its because of selfish interest

Cheating:
Thats the baptismal name women have given the sacred act of having concubines or bedmates

why do u think d word cheatin originated frm women?.abeg do research well

welli:

why do u think d word cheatin originated frm women?.abeg do research well

As expected. . . Always on the offensive! Women!
God will save us

yes o.GOD has to safe u people cus u need dat salvation

pls dont condem me about this fact.
I am married to a lady i dated for eigth good years but after our mariage my wife
becomes something else hoping i was having an affair with other girls which is not true
she fustrate me to the extent that i dont love her anymore, even to have sex with her
there is no more emotional feeling from me towards her.
After some time i started dating a lady close to my office who dont know that i'm married. she always call me to say i love u even if i dont call her before i go home she will be angry with me saying she miss me.
This have really drawn my attention from my wife to this lady, but unfortunately today i saw this so call girl going into the hotel with another guy spending more than 1 hour and she still call me today to say i love u.
I want to go back to my wife and try to love her back but my reason for cheating in the first place was that my wife push me into that.

well i think katakata don burst,in the first place i didnt set up this thread to encourage or support cheating,just wanting to know some few reasons, instead of cheating its better u rather flirt,flirting is healthy in a relationship sha.

keneff:

please don't condem me about this fact.
I am married to a lady i dated for eigth good years but after our mariage my wife
becomes something else hoping i was having an affair with other girls which is not true
she fustrate me to the extent that i don't love her anymore, even to have sex with her
there is no more emotional feeling from me towards her.
After some time i started dating a lady close to my office who don't know that i'm married. she always call me to say i love u even if i don't call her before i go home she will be angry with me saying she miss me.
This have really drawn my attention from my wife to this lady, but unfortunately today i saw this so call girl going into the hotel with another guy spending more than 1 hour and she still call me today to say i love u.
I want to go back to my wife and try to love her back but my reason for cheating in the first place was that my wife push me into that.

So if the other girl had not gone into a hotel with another guy, you wouldn't have thought of going back to your wife to mend fences with her?

Nothing wey person no go hear for this place! Now you are claiming that your wife pushed you into infidelity. That is the oldest lie in da book, that most folks use to justify their antics!

Abeg, look for another excuse. . . . . .please (*yawn*).

why do YOU cheat not why do WE cheat

Abi!

cuz of boredom,

it is in the nature of most humans to cheat, if u don't like it, u can stop doing it.