SISTER'S FIRST TRIP TO UK FROM US

Got on the bus, looked round for where to drop the coin, could not find any, then stuck it in the slot where the ticket comes out of. Driver was like WTF and asked my sister where she was from, I quickly answered Nigeria and everyone on the bus started laughing. Thank God for her american accent that saved the day, otherwise I am sure she would have dropped dead with embarassment. THe bus had to be taken out of service for repairs.

Oh another one.

She wanted to go sightseeing in the westend, and I told her she could take either bus 15, 25 or if late N15 or N25 on her way back home.

Our friends saw her at a bus stop later in the evening and when asked what bus she was waiting for, she said bus N25. The time was six o clock and night buses don't start running till after twelve midnight. They still make fun of her till today.

She got me back though, bigtime.

I went to have my bath in the evening and unbeknown to me she rang the emergency services, her story "my junior sister has been bathing herself since morning and I think she needs help". 

I did not understand the commotion that was going on outside so when the ambulance crew turned up and asked me to get out of the bath I did not know and kept on bathing. I thought it was someone that wanted to use the toilet.

Needless to say, the door was broken down and my sister's story about me bathing was corroborated. I was carted off to hospital whilst still protesting my innocence but no one believed me. I ended up in mental hospital and kept on protesting my sanity to no avail. Hospital staffs refused to believe me, saying that mad people usually say they are not mad.

To make matters worse, after spending a week undergoing tests to check my insanity, my sister was asked if I could be discharged but she said no, that I should be kept in for a further week. (she later told me she asked for the extra week so that she could enjoy the rest of her holiday in the UK without me playing any further pranks on her).

I have learnt my lesson.

big_bumper:

She got me back though, bigtime.

I went to have my bath in the evening and unbeknown to me she rang the emergency services, her story "my junior sister has been bathing herself since morning and I think she needs help".

I did not understand the commotion that was going on outside so when the ambulance crew turned up and asked me to get out of the bath I did not know and kept on bathing. I thought it was someone that wanted to use the toilet.

Needless to say, the door was broken down and my sister's story about me bathing was corroborated. I was carted off to hospital whilst still protesting my innocence but no one believed me. I ended up in mental hospital and kept on protesting my sanity to no avail. Hospital staffs refused to believe me, saying that mad people usually say they are not mad.

To make matters worse, after spending a week undergoing tests to check my insanity, my sister was asked if I could be discharged but she said no, that I should be kept in for a further week. (she later told me she asked for the extra week so that she could enjoy the rest of her holiday in the UK without me playing any further pranks on her).

I have learnt my lesson.

LMAO!!!!!!!!!!

you are soooooooooooooooooooooooooooo fuuuunnnnnnyyyyy
i laugh such that tears is comin out of my eyes

I remembered back in NY , my brother suggested to get a hair cut brofe going to school the next day, so I settle for the first babers shop I not I found, , the look on those white dude faces should have been a clear warining but proceeded ahead anyway, dude started with a comb and clippers and mess my hair up so bad it look like I have map of naija on my head, he was trembling and afraid to say anything, I was trembling, couldn't waut to get home!

I became the joke for weeks for my brothers and their 'acatas', i should have known white dude hair are cut differently from blacl folks.

big bumper - i do it all the time! the drivers constantly have to tell me where to insert the pass. by the way - they're always changing up the rules about bus/train passes and boarding. Welcome to America!
lm

I heard of this one from my mum

In the winter this nigerian man just came home from work his hands were cold and he thought
hey the fastest way to warm up my hands would be to run hot water on my hands

My mother said untill that day she had never seen a grown man cry like that because cold hands and hot water HURTS SOOOOOO much

omigod same exact thing happened to me! it was soooooooo painful. this pain is so different it turns your brain inside out. makes you just holler like an animal in pain. it was on a bitter cold winter night o that i decided to dash to the store near my house to buy a few things. i made the mistake of not wearing gloves thinking i could be back in no time because it wasn't far. biggest mistake! i tell you, half way walking back home, my hands were already frozen solid, couldnt feel a thing! by the time i got into my house, first thing i did was turn on the hot water and dump my hand in. man, ive never experienced pain like that in my life!. i tell you, you bgin to even start hollering like an animal at one point because of the intensity of the pain. no kidding! afterwards i was told that i got frost bite and that its very dangerous - you could freeze to the point where they might have to cut your hand off! imagine! ha! since then i've known better o. never leave home in winter without being properly dressed!

LMAO @ making animal noises lol

lol

mine:
using the laundry machine, each time i went, i bring back my clothes! i kept asking myself, which kin thing be this?
3months passed still haven't done my laundry. thank God it's was winter time and i had lots of clothes to change into/shop for new ones. then i met a PG student from Naija. We chatted abt and then I asked him abt the laundry machine. He took me there to show me how, but then he kept telling every Tom, Dick and Harry that came in to do their laundry

"you see, this fine girl is from Africa and am showing her how to use the machine" I felt so embarrassed. why telling all the oyinbo that now? and they all looking at me in a funny way, fine girl can't use the machine


Throughout my 1st year, I always throw away the coins cuz I couldn't understand it. which one is dime, nickel or penny? whenever i'm given a change i will throw it away. i will have some coins but will use the paper money instead. then one day my roommate said, girl you should be saving those coins and then make a deposit at the end of the year, following year i saved and deposited it, it almost reached 100 o

ran down to eat at the cafe but ran out cuz milk and juice too cold and in winter
entered the school bus from dorms to class, took me all around the huge school cuz i didn't know where i was going and shy to ask
share yours, more to come.
the memories lingers

@ omoge. LMAO are you for real? lawd, and i thot I was bush!

my ribs o!

very true, and I thought I was very prepared, lol. I still wonder why they call that small money 10cent and the big one 5cent, lol
that was one main confusion, so i throway all the coins, lol 

the first quater, one of my instructor invited me to her church. i dressed up in silk skirt and blouse, everyone in the car was in jeans and thick sweater. they complimented my nice dress but then asked if i wasn't cold? i told them I'm warm but on getting out of the car, it was snowing heavily already. not even the heat in the church could help me. i was shivering that even my hair all stood up on my head.

then they said ha Rochester weather is unpredictable, so always dress warm. Too late because I already caught bad cold.
well i thought to myself, i was only trying not to use Jeans to church now.

@omoge

I can't laugh ohhhhhhhhhh , LMAO.

U be one Original bush girl

Mine is not as good as the one Omoge told ,
but when we first came i was 9years old and my mother took me and my brothers to go register for school ASAP. After the whole registration, my mother asked the woman "where do i go to buy there books and uniforms". The woman i remember telling us "books are free here, you dont have to pay." We were so happy, it was like we had won something, all through that day my mother lectured us, on how lucky we were to be in a place with free books, no uniforms, we should cherish it.

,
My real first first experience had to do with food, how about you guys?
It was 1989 we landed in NY and a family friend took us to our first meal in the U.S, it was McDonalds, the burger smelled horrible and i refused to eat it, it took me 5 years before i actually ate a burger

omoge25:

My real first first experience had to do with food, how about you guys?
It was 1989 we landed in NY and a family friend took us to our first meal in the U.S, it was McDonalds, the burger smelled horrible and i refused to eat it, it took me 5 years before i actually ate a burger

for real?  ohmygod, this is the height of bushness, no offence there o. lmao

lol

lol

lol

Is this a cock and bull story that you are narrating? Someone eating pet food? C'mon, who would believe it?

Vicjustice:

I arrived Athens 1998,

I just don't understand what is with naija men and oyinbo woman.  i know this jjc that just came to america. every time his trying to bag a white woman.  one time we were all in the car, he pull up to gas station got out and started chatting with this oyinbo woman, not even 2 mininutes later he comes back and  SPEEDS OFF.
ok bros what is the problem, "that na man o"  thats what he gets.  Is it in the blood that once you leave naija you must bag a oyinbo woman?  piece of advice if the woman fine well well, mami wata, RUN its probably a man.

Nice story though 

To Vicjustice:

Dude! I am sorry that this was your first experience in the U.S. Maybe next time, you'll just go sight-seeing(?)

he is not in US. it happened in Athen

My frist experience in the U.S was seeing a limo in the plane before we landed
A bad experience was navigating the subway in nyc
the thing is there are parts of the subway in which you could climb some stairs to get to the other side so you could either go uptown or down town without having to pay another fare
one day i was supposed to be going uptown and i mistakenly got on the downtown train so as the train kept going i started getting scared and i lived on 174th street. by the time i decided to get of the train before i went too far and got lost i decided to get of at 135th street so i thought hey there would be stairs here so i could switch to uptown for free.
long story short i came out of the subway far from home without any money and i had to walk from 135th street to 174th street in the bronx
you may do the math and think it is straight forward 39 blocks but it was further than that because there are number and name streets. When i got home my mother started yelling at me accusing me of hanging out with awon omo oni drug lol i was soooooooooo i just shake my head and i went to be i was really tired.

@omega25red.  eiya poor baby. i went through the same exact experience, but in my own case it was in the UK. the darn bus was taking a completely different route that i wasn't familiar with and i wasn't bold enough to even get up and ask whats up. i ended up in some country looking place far away from where i live. dumb ass me. had to finally drop in the middle of nowhere and find my way back only to walk into them thuggish looking guys that looked like they wanted to jump me. imagine you're a girl walking through the streets in the middle of the night, not even knowing where youre going in a strange city. HELLA SCARY! . ive never prayed so much in my life. i told God that if he spares my life that night, i promise never to walkabout like that
finally got home and my momma yelled and cussed at me. she mustv'e been worried when i didn't show up at home. man, i was just relieved that i was home safely. didn't care if she pounded my head with a pestle. 

can't really tell,

what part of rochester does omoge live in?
pele, the cold here is worse than the north pole. i must have had flu at least 5 times in the last few months.

sorry david where u dey hide ?

@ moi?

I'm on campus,

I came to love the weather, after the 1st year. After the church incident, i got me Thermal wears which i use inside my sweater and jeans.
I really loved the winter. Never been sick of flu

davidylan:

what part of rochester does omoge live in?
pele, the cold here is worse than the north pole. i must have had flu at least 5 times in the last few months.

this same U of R undergrad campus? I'm over at the medical center. This world na small place o! got an email addy?

You came to love the winter? No be ur fault, you dont have to pay for heat!

omogenaija:

sorry david where u dey hide ?

hide ke? i dey my little hut o.