My best friend wants to break up with her boyfriend of three years. We live in the Middle East and people here are generally conservative. She is only 19 years old and her dad has been pressuring her to get married for 2 years now becuase he doesn't want her disgrace the family. He told her that is she doesn't find someone in 4 months she will have to marry her first cousin, which we both think is gross. Especially since the cousin is an alcoholic and only finished up to sixth grade. The father is so serious about it he threatened to kill her and himself if she didn't comply. (He's very violent. He once beat her up badly for wearing make up in public even though she was fully covered, head to toe and then some.)
Anyway the thing is her current boyfriend she feels is too immature for her to marry and she needs to find someone who is older, has a job and is more responsible. She tried to break up with him by ignoring his phone calls and if she does speak with him she tries to rile him up. This hasn't worked. I told her this is a cowardly way to break up with someone, but she is afraid to hurt his feelings because she really cares for him. She even wants to keep contact with him after marriage.(she will probably get a nice beating for that)
So yeah, my friend keeps bothering me about how to tell her current boyfriend without hurting him. Any advice? Honestly the whole issue is very aggravating to me.

This whole situation is weird. She's a kid sef talkless of the whole marriage issue. Idk what to tell you

Yea I agree she is a kid. The thing is in her family most people get married early. She has a cousin that is 15 years old, married and expecting her first baby already. Whenever some else in her family gets married they tease her and call her an old woman. LOL! Old woman at 19.

She better marry who her family wants her to unless she wants them to do honor killing on her arse

 [b]this case is serious.what a father![/b]

welli:

[b]this case is serious.what a father![/b]

Really it is serious. Last week the father stripped his other wife naked and sliced her hand with a kitchen knife because she was late to open the door when he knocked. He thought there was another man inside. Imagine what he'll do if his daughter refuses to marry

chika98:

She better marry who her family wants her to unless she wants them to do honor killing on her arse

ROFL!!!! We don't live in Saudi

Quite unfortunate. Maybe she should explain things to her boyfriend in full.

Riskie:

ROFL!!!! We don't live in Saudi

Aint they alll the same ? My sista she better marry who them wan make she marry. The yawa that comes from disobeying family in those parts of the world is horrible. Saudi or dubai na de same tin, lol

chika98:

Aint they alll the same ? My sista she better marry who them wan make she marry. The yawa that comes from disobeying family in those parts of the world is horrible. Saudi or dubai na de same tin, lol

Dubai is actually very liberal in comparison to many of ME countries. I told her to marry the cousin to avoid trouble but she doesn't want to marry an illiterate drunkard.

for one in my life,i am dumfounded

jennykadry:

for one in my life,i am dumfounded

That's exactly how I feel.

That's exactly how I feel.

how can a father be dis useless and wicked,how can a father push his own flesh and blood daughter into the pit of destruction,or is he d real father abi step father?are they poor?is dat y he is asking her to get married?let her leave d house for him joooo,doesnt she have friends/relatives that will take her in

jennykadry:

how can a father be this useless and wicked,how can a father push his own flesh and blood daughter into the pit of destruction,or is he d real father abi step father?are they poor?is that y he is asking her to get married?let her leave d house for him joooo,doesnt she have friends/relatives that will take her in

It is their tradition and these folks don't play with it, I really feel for your friend Riskie. Sucks a lot

jennykadry:

how can a father be this useless and wicked,how can a father push his own flesh and blood daughter into the pit of destruction,or is he d real father abi step father?are they poor?is that y he is asking her to get married?let her leave d house for him joooo,doesnt she have friends/relatives that will take her in

He's her real father.Since the dad himself is a drunk he's sees nothing wrong with it. They are not poor but the dad spends a lot of money on drugs and prostitutes, so.The relatives she has will simply turn her over to her father who will then beat her senseless. She's trapped really.

she is not trapped,our destiny lies in our hands,let her take a bold and difficult step and leave dat house

Easier said than done

yea that is why i said its a bold and difficult step,or would u prefer it if she wastes her life to a forced and useless marriage

Short of words.

I wouldn't want any woman to end up in an unhappy marriage but running away in this situation is very easy to say but quite diffcult to do because of culture and tradition restraints

people have done it,like i said its a tough one and very difficult,bit its better off,or would u want her to all in d name of tradition useless her life,and wen d life is useless will tradition amend it back?

If she did just leave like that he would find her. This is a tiny country lol. And plus if she left the house he would cancel her visa and she would get deported to Iran and that's no fun at all.

If she lived in the western world then, It will be easier to just leave but since she's there in Dubai, I find it very hard to see how she's gonna just up and leave.

This situation needs divine intervention. Has she told her boyfriend about it and what was his response? Fathers like this particular one can send someone to an early grave.

in one word poster,answer my ques:is dis post real?

Hehe

@WELLI

I WAS ABOUT ASKING THE SAME THING,because THE STORY IN IT ,IS BECOMING TOO MUCH

lol@ is this post for real
We are talking about people in the middle east here people

chika98:

lol@ is this post for real
We are talking about people in the middle east here people

i dnt get you

Alls am saying is that it is not uncommon to hear such things from people in the middle east. It is how they are( most of them anyways)

wasn't aware of dat.na wa.