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Nairaland Forum / Entertainment / Jokes Etc / Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego (1488033 Views)
akpos funniest joke, and more. / 24/7 Nigeria Jokes Update / Real Funny Nigeria Jokes (2) (3) (4)
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Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 2:18pm On Jan 03, 2014 |
A man who is a chronic stammerer was looking for a particular street in Lagos. He could not find it. He walked up to a bricklayer Akpos and asked for directions; Peee peee please i i i am loo loooo loooking for iiiiikorodu ro road? Akpos replied; Jus jus just fofo fo follow the the nes nes 2 2 streeet and and turn right that's ikorodu ikorodu road! The stammerer got angry, gave Akpos a hot slap and said; Are are you joking joking with me? Akpos replied; No. I'm a stammerer like you! 7 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:26pm On Jan 03, 2014 |
A guy died and went to hell and met satan. Satan said to the guy; Nowadays, people entering hell are able to choose their own personal hell. I will take you to a series of doors, and you will look inside, and tell me if that is where you would like to spend eternity. The guy agreed and satan took him down a long, dark hallway. Satan opened the 1st door, the man looked inside, and saw thousands of people standing on their heads on a hard wood floor. The guy said; This looks too uncomfortable. Show me the next room please. Satan walked the guy down to the 2nd door. The guy looked inside, and saw thousands of people standing on their heads on a concrete floor. The guy said; This is even worse. Please show me another room. Satan nods and took him to the 3rd door. The guy looked inside and saw thousands of people standing knee deep in liquid shit, all drinking coffee. The guy said; This is the place for me. Satan asked; Are you sure? Once the door closes you can never go back o. The guy said; Yes i'm very sure. I love coffee. The guy stepped in, and satan closed the door. Just before the guy could get comfortable, a voice on the loudspeaker said; Coffee break is over, Back on your Heads! 6 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 7:18pm On Jan 03, 2014 |
2 Guys Akpos and Ochuko were just promoted from privates to sergeants. They were out taking a walk when Ochuko pointed out; Look at that club, let's go in and have fun. Akpos said; But we are privates. Ochuko corrected; We are sergeants now. And pulled Akpos inside. Inside, Ochuko said; Akpos now let's sit down and have a drink. Akpos complained; But we are privates. Ochuko asked; Akpos are you a fool? And points at his uniform and said; We are sergeants now. They started having a drink and a prostitute walked up to Ochuko and said; You are so cute, I'd like to sleep with you, but I have gonorrhea. Ochuko pulled his friend Akpos to a corner and whispered; Go and check dictionary to see what gonorrhea means. If it's good, give me the good sign. Akpos went to check it and came back and gave Ochuko the good sign. 3 weeks later, Ochuko found himself in the hospital with a terrible case of gonorrhea. "Akpos," he called, "Why did you give me the good sign? Akpos replied; Well, Ochuko, we are sergeants now. The dictionary says gonorrhea affects only the privates. 2 Likes |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:53am On Jan 04, 2014 |
After 2013 Calabar Carnival. Akpos: Ochuko last year was the bomb, didn't you see babes from all over Nigeria? Ochuko: Yes, but old things shall pass away. Akpos: Just like your old man. 1 Like |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 12:05pm On Jan 04, 2014 |
Akpos enters into a public toilet. He UnCloth and starts doing his thing calmly and relaxed. When he look behind the door, he sees a note written; SMILE, YOU ARE LIVE ON AFRICA MAGIC. 2 Likes |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 1:50pm On Jan 04, 2014 |
An American zoologist told 2 men Akpos and Ochuko to catch lions for him at the price of 20,000 Dollars per lion. Akpos and Ochuko went into the forest to catch the lions. After a fruitless search, they got exhausted and fell asleep. A short while later Akpos heard the roar of a lion and woke up. He saw 150 lions surrounding them and woke Ochuko up and said; Ochuko wake up. We are rich! 9 Likes |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 4:53pm On Jan 04, 2014 |
An American priest walked into a barber shop in Washington, D.C. After he got his haircut, he asked how much it would be. The barber replied; No charge. I consider it a service to the Lord. The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 prayer books and a thank you note from the priest in front of the door. Later that day, a British police officer on vacation came in and got his hair cut. He asked how much it would be. The barber replied; No charge. I consider it a service to the community. The next morning, he came to work and there were a dozen donuts and a thank you note from the police officer. Then, a Nigerian Businessman came in and got a haircut. He asked how much it would be. The barber said; If you are really a Nigerian then you don't have to pay since you are from the same country as Hakeem Olajuwon the basketballer. The next morning, the barber came to work and there were 12 Nigerians in front of his door waiting for a haircut. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:31pm On Jan 04, 2014 |
A pastor in a sunday church service said to the congregation; If you know your wife is beautiful come out and sow a wonderful seed. People whose wife were beautiful started coming out and dropping 2, 3, 4 Thousand Naira and so on. A man Akpos came out and dropped 5 naira. The pastor asked; Mr man, is your wife not beautiful? Why did you drop 5 Naira? Akpos replied; Pastor, if you see my wife, you will give me change. 2 Likes |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by okoria: 11:22am On Jan 05, 2014 |
As an airplane is about to crash, a female passenger jumps up frantically and announces, "If I'm going to die, I want to die feeling like a woman." She removes all her clothing and asks, "Is there someone on this plane who is man enough to make me feel like a woman?" A man stands up, removes his shirt and says, "Here, iron this!". |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by okoria: 11:24am On Jan 05, 2014 |
A child asked his father, "How were people born?" So his father said, "Adam and Eve made babies, then their babies became adults and made babies, and so on." The child then went to his mother, asked her the same question and she told him, "We were monkeys then we evolved to become like we are now." The child ran back to his father and said, "You lied to me!" His father replied, "No, your mom was talking about her side of the family." 1 Like |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by okoria: 11:30am On Jan 05, 2014 |
On the roof of a very tall building are four men; one is asian, one is mexican, one is black, and the last one is white. The asian walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and jumps off the roof. Next, the mexican walks to the ledge and also says, "This is for all my people" and then he jumps off the roof. Next is the black guy's turn. The black guy walks to the ledge and says, "This is for all my people" and then throws the white guy off the roof. |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Ishikawa: 3:29pm On Jan 05, 2014 |
Very funny video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFnTSruFSg4 1 Like |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by cyrusglobe: 4:43pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
@ okoria very funny. 1 Like |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by cyrusglobe: 4:44pm On Jan 06, 2014 |
@ gistmate.com : Three women were sitting in a bar, (burnette, redhead, and a blonde) they were all pregnant......... The burnette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "Well I was on top when I concieved so I will have a baby boy"........ The red head said, "If your logic is correct then I will have a baby girl because I was on the bottom when I concieved. ..... The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".. 2 Likes |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 12:48pm On Jan 08, 2014 |
A Guy Akpos who was running late to school for lecture had to find a way to get to school. He had no money. So he couldn't board a bus. A plan suddenly came to his head. He stopped a bike and asked the bikeman to carry him to school. The charge was 100 Naira. As they got very close to the school, Akpos told the bike man that he wants to urinate by the big bush close to the school. He came down from the bike and whispered; Capone! I have brought it o! The bike is a new one! The Bikeman quickly sped off. 3 Likes 1 Share |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 4:34pm On Jan 08, 2014 |
A hunter Akpos on a sunday morning decided not to go to church but went hunting in the bush. As he was walking in the bush he suddenly saw a lion in front of him and knelt down and started praying to God; Father Lord God please let this lion become a christian, if this lion become a christian i will not go hunting on sunday morning again, i will go to church. He opened his eyes and was shocked to see the lion kneeling down and praying. The lion prayed; Father Lord God please bless and sanctify this food for me as i eat. 2 Likes |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Oluwalala(m): 6:45pm On Jan 08, 2014 |
njuwo: A lady wanted a house boy, she went overothers are making effort and trying to be creative,see the rubbish you now posted here! Its people like you that don't let nigeria progress, copy cat |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 12:01pm On Jan 09, 2014 |
A Mad Man Akpos planned to run away from the psychiatric hospital. He planned that he will go to the gate, beat up the watchman, open the gate and run away. When he reached the gate, the watchman was not there and the gate was wide open. He exclaimed; Shit! My plan has failed, let me go back, i will try again tomorrow. 1 Like |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by revilomichaels(m): 1:44pm On Jan 10, 2014 |
South African pastor makes members eat grass, Young Lady 'Dip' Her Head Inside ELephant Mouth ...read more at[url]reviloonthebeat..com[/url] |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by frankudokwublog: 3:34pm On Jan 10, 2014 |
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Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:30am On Jun 28, 2014 |
Ofego Invalid Application Wife WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWw9ayvS3b4&hl=en-GB&gl=NG&guid=&client=mv-google |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 8:05am On Jun 28, 2014 |
A Funny Mistake Ofego Made While Recording A Joke WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eSW0Iq7G1OI&client=mv-google&hl=en-GB&guid=&gl=NG |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 11:00am On Jun 28, 2014 |
Ofego School Girls WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ELCjWAhlMVs&guid=&hl=en-GB&gl=NG&client=mv-google |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 12:12pm On Jun 28, 2014 |
Ofego The Perfume Is Dead WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yNZCsBzdv20&ctp=CCEQpDAiEwiFi6-7sZy_AhWWNKoKHTciACgyCWM0LWZlZWQtdVoYVUM5N2JwZk5Qc0o1MFBXMXhGNXA2UGd3&client=mv-google&gl=NG&guid=&hl=en-GB 1 Like |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 12:22pm On Jun 28, 2014 |
Ofego False Alarm WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sk52-QFw868&gl=NG&hl=en-GB&guid=&client=mv-google |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 6:14am On Jun 29, 2014 |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 5:05am On Jun 30, 2014 |
Ofego Ghost In The House To Watch World Cup WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXoCfzVJdkU&client=mv-google&gl=NG&hl=en-GB&guid= |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 5:12am On Jul 02, 2014 |
Ofego How Super Eagles Players Sneaked Into Nigeria After Losing Out To France At The FIFA World Cup Brazil 2014 WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t5fkWfjpimw&hl=en-GB&guid=&client=mv-google&gl=NG |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by njuwo(m): 5:57am On Jul 03, 2014 |
Ofego So Church Now Has DSTV WATCH VIDEO-->> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xmSiUTpRn_s&guid=&hl=en-GB&client=mv-google&gl=NG |
Re: Nigeria Jokes Update With Ofego by Owoado(m): 3:25pm On Jul 03, 2014 |
Lol |
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