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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Romance / How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex (4075 Views)
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How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by uaphorism(m): 10:53pm On Oct 08, 2013 |
This story I want to relate, is the most outstanding of my not-so-proud-of-myself moments.. There was this girl, some while back in school, we'll call her 'C'.. On a certain night, while I was in class reading in my second year, she stepped in with another friend of mine, a boy named 'D' to read too.. After I'd made small talk with D, they sat on the seat I was sitting on and began reading.. This girl, is those kinda girls that boys respect.. I mean, her comportment was just soo perfect that from second year till we graduated, everyone, even fellow girls, called her Lady C.. No boy ever bragged in the hostel about how he touched her or did 'stuff' with her.. She was just that kinda girl.. However, I didnt notice her much then, until that night sitting close to her. Around 2am that night, I asked her to stroll with me that around the school grounds..everyone was feeling sleepy at that time so, she accepted.. We struck a friendship that night as we talked and talked and talked till around 5 when her hostel was opened. It seemed as if we'd known each other for ages..we almost instantly became comfy in each other's company..looking back now, I wish 'twas a relationship and not a friendship that was struck.. Anyway, we got very close, the calls the texts, the 'sweerie', 'darling' and what nots.. There were more night classes, I went to her room, she came to mine, I even later got a room all to myself and she always came visiting, we hung out, more strolls, we quarrelled, fought, then we hug and make up, we told ourselves our deepest secrets..u know, just the classic friendship and as M.I puts it, no forming and no film tricks.. The sweetest part of this friendship was that we never had any intimate engagements, no kissing, no romance..not to mention sex..twas just platonic.. Now, dont get me wrong, this girl isn't the type that dampens the sex urge, if anything, she heightens it..standing at 6ft, moderate frontal endowments, a spanking figure 8, a very voluptuous posterior..and a beautiful face to crown it all up.. As a man I most certainly am, with blood and not kerosene coursing through my veins, I got ideas but I never entertained them..but you can only fight nature for so long.. We kept at it till our final year..we kept other friends of the opposite sex oo.. However, I could postpone a sex date to hang out with her.. She could cancel a hang out with a male friend of hers, if I needed her to and all that.. When my friends come to ask me if we do stuffs, I tell them 'no' and they take it that I'm joking.. I almost socked a buddy of mine in the jaw when he called her a b!tch at her back when he'll call her Lady C normally..well, that's how close we were without the romance... Until one night, during our final exams..we went to read one night..and while she was sleeping, I simply lost a hold of myself and squeezed her endowments till they screamed blue murder..the fact that I repeatedly did that got me crazy in my saner moments..up until that time I'd bn very proud of how much I could hold myself no matter the temptation..and yet twas with my friend that I lost my head.. Someone might be wondering why I feel soo bad, I mean, I didnt really do 'much'.. I think its just cuz I believed one can be 'just friends' with the opposite sex and maintain physical contact yet, not have any intimate dealings.. I now know that its an aberration..a contradiction to the laws of nature and you can fight nature for so long.. I actually told her sha..but that was after graduation and err, I was forgiven..still felt that I should share anyway.. Thanks for reading my epistle 2 Likes |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by didicold(f): 11:09pm On Oct 08, 2013 |
Who told u she didnt know u did so? Dere is no kind of sleep a woman can sleep dat she wont know, she just chose not to call u on it,dazall 6 Likes |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by UyiIredia(m): 11:13pm On Oct 08, 2013 |
@ OP: I would say you simply acted out latent desires you had for her and I am at a very similar point regarding a female friend I've had since my mid-teens. Just not done nothing yet, even when alone, which is rare. But what happened after that, did you consummate the relationship or shrug it off and remained friends, please tell. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by UyiIredia(m): 11:16pm On Oct 08, 2013 |
didicold: Who told u she didnt know u did so? Dere is no kind of sleep a woman can sleep dat she wont know, she just chose not to call u on it,dazall True, and that leaves room to assume she liked it, if she didn't she would have reacted against it. Maybe that's what the OP suggests: that even a platonic relationship might ride along strong sexual and emotional undercurrents. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by Mishydoo(m): 11:28pm On Oct 08, 2013 |
...U both just feeling urselves silently! She knew wat u did, she probly liked it! U just ddnt hv d gut to go further. FYI..........DERZ ABSOLUTELY NO WORD LIKE PLATONIC BETWEEN A GUY AND GIRL! 4 Likes |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by Nobody: 11:45pm On Oct 08, 2013 |
op reminds of the long cold nites of jacking in faculty. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by Nobody: 12:03am On Oct 09, 2013 |
Mishydoo: ...U both just feeling urselves silently! She knew wat u did, she probly liked it! U just ddnt hv d gut to go further.so its called friends with benefits....? |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by Abbey2sam(m): 12:19am On Oct 09, 2013 |
If you know it's relationship that you want, don't be her friend for too long or don't even apply to be her friend................... Just go straight to the point |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by babadey(m): 12:30am On Oct 09, 2013 |
ladunsky: so its called friends with benefits....? relationship with benefits |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by babadey(m): 12:32am On Oct 09, 2013 |
Abbey2sam: If you know it's relationship that you want, don't be her friend for too long or don't even apply to be her friend................... seconded. But what if she says,sorry i have a bf 1 Like |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by elrony(m): 1:24am On Oct 09, 2013 |
uaphorism: This story I want to relate, is the most outstanding of my not-so-proud-of-myself moments.. Nice write-up...but op are u gay..#just_asking 1 Like |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by 190theclown: 1:25am On Oct 09, 2013 |
You need Jesus |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by elrony(m): 2:19am On Oct 09, 2013 |
190-the-clown: Lol...u haff start!! |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by WackyJ1(m): 3:00am On Oct 09, 2013 |
OP it is kerosine you have in your blood |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by uaphorism(m): 9:05am On Oct 09, 2013 |
@didicold..my conscience acted out after the incident oo..while acconpanying her to her hostel I just started acting weird..but she was perfectly normal.. I subtly inquired if she cud remain asleep while sum1 touches her and she said 'no' and when I confessed to her, she was perfectly surprised..she even took it as a joke..that it wasn't possible..well, the sleep mustv been strong @Uyi Iredia.. We didnt consummate it oo..we remained friends after graduation..lotsa calls and texts but we havent set eyes on each other since then @mishydoo.. I feel so too now @chidyhels.. Good times..good times @abbey2sam.. Therez a way a girl makes her first impression on u and u consider her too sacrosanct to start a relatnshp wt her that wouldn't lead to marriage.. This view will certainly chng in d long run but the 'mistake' of starting off as 'just friends' is already made @elrony..hehehe.. I believe that at sum point in my epistle I said that I postponed sex dates for a hang out wt her @190-the-clown.. Everyone needs Jesus.. I'm sure ur nt problem free too @wackyj1.. I believe it is safe to assume that my blood transforms to kerosene whn I'm with her 1 Like |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by 190: 9:29am On Oct 09, 2013 |
mschewww |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by sparkleRed(f): 10:10am On Oct 09, 2013 |
190: mschewww190 u nid jesus also |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by SwTonia(f): 10:23am On Oct 09, 2013 |
Dia is no friendship btw a boy nd a gal.I was told bt I never blive until when we kissed in d skul library,We ended up being friends with benefit...I wish we never did cus it has caused us our friendship 2 Likes 2 Shares |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by 190: 10:43am On Oct 09, 2013 |
sparkle Red: |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by walex25(m): 11:16am On Oct 09, 2013 |
I couldn't agree more with OP. Nothing like true friendship between a girl and a boy, is either relationship or friends with benefit. However if you think such thing exist then believe me, thought of romance must have crept into mind of either one of them, may be he/she is not just bold enough to act it. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by Chimezie198(m): 11:18am On Oct 09, 2013 |
Shake up ur bum bum... Bum bum bum bum 1 Like |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by netotse(m): 11:37am On Oct 09, 2013 |
@OP Nice thread...I agree there's no point being unnecessarily close with females, too many complications |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by freecocoa(f): 1:26pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
Well I disagree cos I have male friends who are really 'just friends'. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by uaphorism(m): 1:40pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
freecocoa: Well I disagree cos I have male friends who are really 'just friends'.all that will change with frequent contact with such 'friends' in seclusion |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by chymystique(f): 2:15pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
All dis ish abt a guy and a gal bin jst frnds is rubbish... I ve a male bestfriend and we ve never bin intimate b4... I love him very very much.. I ve slpt lik 5times wif him on d same bed and natn happned and we ve known each oda for more dan five yrs. He is one I respect till dis moment.. For me et depends on wah u guys feel n want sha. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by UyiIredia(m): 2:37pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
^^^Great ! Some dudes on NL think male folks on the same bed with a female equals hammering. SMH for them. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by kachiz(m): 2:54pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
chymystique: All dis ish abt a guy and a gal bin jst frnds is rubbish... I ve a male bestfriend and we ve never bin intimate b4... I love him very very much.. I ve slpt lik 5times wif him on d same bed and natn happned and we ve known each oda for more dan five yrs. He is one I respect till dis moment.. For me et depends on wah u guys feel n want sha.You think that guy sleeps peacefully anytime u are on the same bed with him. he is scared of telling u his mind unless he is an ethiopian eunuch. av been in that shoe before. *iche na mmadu wu ewu* 2 Likes |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by chymystique(f): 2:59pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
kachiz: Wen we first met he told me he wanted more dan friendship I told him No... he said he liked me and didn't mind being frnds wif me and nw we ve grown to b vewi fond of each other and he is like a bro to me.. Looll.. He aint a eunuch he has a gf and an active Ssexx life ... |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by uaphorism(m): 5:01pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
To every rule there are exceptions.. I'm not at all surprised that one or two people beg to differ from my opinion as stated.. However, what is certain is, ruling out impotence (mental), cuz even if a man is physically impotent, the thoughts of intimacy with his 'friend' must cross his mind, the thots must come and most times it is mutual..the ladies just love living in deception.. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by WackyJ1(m): 5:35pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
uaphorism: the ladies just love living deception..This line is a Gospel truth. |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by kachiz(m): 5:50pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
chymystique: Active sex life or gf blah blah blah, sooner than later u will undastand wat am saying. dat guy is a bit scared. mayb wen he even does, u will end up saying "i took you as a broda and u disappointed me" and dat will be it. 1 Like |
Re: How I Changed My Perception About Being 'just Friends' With The Opposite Sex by Preceedo(m): 7:02pm On Oct 09, 2013 |
WackyJ1: OP it is kerosine you have in your blood no its self control that many gals lack. |
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