justice would have bn done if this thread was posted on jokes. .Oh my, its so funny!

lysaa:

justice would have bn done if this thread was posted on jokes. .Oh my, its so funny!

State assemblies on the run because of juju scare, Akwa Ibom Traditional rulers request governors assistance in fighting strong influence of juju in the state, and various politicians citing juju as an excuse for not doing well, and you still think it's funny

@ijaks
I missed your point.

Some of you wanted to know whether this thread is not a joke, it's not, at least to the minds of a large section of naija people. Now the President is involved in chasing juju people in his administration around.

[b]Juju Scam: Yar’Adua Orders Probe of NDDC Boss
By Kinsley Nwezeh, 08.07.2008

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President Umaru Musa Yar’Adua has ordered an investigation into allegations that the Chairman of the Niger Delta Development Commission (NDDC), Ambassador Sam Edem, spent N1billion to secure the services of a sorcerer to employ spiritual means to enable him secure contracts from the Akwa Ibom State Government.
The President also directed the Inspector General of Police, Mike Okiro, and the Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) to get to the root of the matter.
Edem was also alleged to have burnt N270 million at a Port Harcourt cemetery, which he later bathed with in order to realise his wishes from the state government functionaries.
According to a statement made by the sorcerer, Dr. Perekambowei Ogah, also known as Matthew Sonoma, at the Zone 5 Police Headquarters in Benin, Edo State and published in the latest edition of Newswatch magazine, Edem paid into his executive savings account at the Ughelli, Delta State branch of one of the new generation banks, N15 million to make some sacrifice in order to retain his position as NNDC chairman when the board was dissolved.
Ogah also claimed to have received three different requests from Edem notably to work on the Akwa Ibom State Governor, Dr. Godswill Akpabio, in order to secure contracts from him; to kill the Managing Director of NDDC, Mr. Timi Alaibe, who also works in the same office with him to enable him have his way in decision making processes and to work on Vice-President Goodluck Jonathan to always provide him support if there is any plan to remove him.
For the above tasks, Ogah charged N570,000,000 for which Edem paid in instalments of N220,000,000, N50,000.000 and N40,000.000 respectively amounting to N310,000.000 with a balance of N260.000.000.
According to the sorcerer, at the expiration of the date for Alaibe’s demise, which never happened, Edem demanded a refund while Ogah stood his ground that the payment was not completed prompting Edem to report the matter to the police as a case of fraud.
“That after the expiration of the period within which the said Timi Alaibe was to die, the petitioner came to ask me why the charm did not work and I told him that his (Alaibe’s) spirit is too strong. On that note he grew annoyed and asked me to refund the money he paid for Timi’s work,” he said.
The NDDC chairman in his statement at the same Zone 5 Police headquarters, Benin, said he was under a spell when he made the payments.
According to him, “The amount of money the fraudster collected from me through the hypnotic spell is about N800million. The extortion spread over months and were always with death threats to my person and family members, friends and staff”.[/b]

http://www.thisdayonline.com/nview.php?id=119018

I think Yardua should just creat a ministry of juju affairs.

another bubble has burst, 800 million naira juju, this shoild go into juju hall of fame

If the NNDC juju man has the technology to make a man die, why doesn't the Nigerian army recruit him. He could just wipe out a whole civilization for us without loosing a single soldier.

naijaking1:

did your juju work out for the boys and how?

omo 4get dat 1 ooo
of course na
if person lyk segun fit juju all of us 2 nairaland
why cant i

USA suspicious of Nigeria’s victory


Captain Isaac Promise on Wednesday had a tough time convincing the journalists at the mixed zone that Nigeria’s 2-1 victory over USA was not influenced by juju.

Promise scored the first goal while Obinna Nsofor grabbed the second, after the captain, who was substituted by Osaze Odemwingie, handed him the captain‘s band.

But some of the journalists, mostly from the USA believed that there was something majical about the way the goals were scored.

Promise said, “This is not a magical band and remember it is my third match and I only scored today. We played well and deserved our win.”

Nsofor was also on hand to defend himself. He said, “That is not funny. What is magical about a match we fought so hard to win. Isaac is the captain and I was the closest to him as he was going out and he gave the band to me.

“The goalkeeper (Ambrose Vanzekin) is the vice-captain but he was just too far from him. I am happy I gave the band a good use with my goal. I scored against Japan without any band.”

Goal scoring juju arm band? Made in Nigeria For once, I'm proud to be a Nigerian

I dont think the magical in the article means juju.

Sometimes expressions are figurative. Unless the US reporters were African.

tpia:

I don't think the magical in the article means juju.

Sometimes expressions are figurative. Unless the US reporters were African.

No need to lecture us about figures of speech.
Did you not hear the captain complain that he had a hard time convincing journalists that the goal was not aided by juju?

naijaking1:

No need to lecture us about figures of speech.
Did you not hear the captain complain that he had a hard time convincing journalists that the goal was not aided by juju?

lecture yourself, plz.

The captain assumed they meant juju.

saying something appears magical, doesnt mean I think juju is involved.

Some naija peeps no go kill me with their naija interpretation applied to everything.

I don't know why you insist that this speech is figurative and not literary.

Modification of English. The 'juju' is not a new word to the British nor the Americans.

haba.

I wonder e no dey work 4 us again!!!
we `re losing it.
not supporting really!!!

still talking about juju?

wag1 nairalander
let talk bout naijakind1

@origina9ja
You never tell us whether the juju is helping with catching boys or not

@niajaking1
over work self
abi u want make i join u put 4 koto

Juju na one of our important resources na. Dem not teach you that one for primary school? Coal, cocoa, timber,palm-oil,juju. Na correct source of foreign exchange.

origina9ja:

@niajaking1
over work self
abi u want make i join u put 4 koto

Sista! I no understand-o

i dey tell u say the juju day work well well
u want make i join you aswell




_{i can prove it if u want}

origina9ja:

i dey tell u say the juju day work well well
u want make i join you aswell
_{i can prove it if u want}

Congratulations, my dear. Now you have a secret and powerful weapon to maintain and keep a happy love life, pass all your exams, overcome all your competitions, chose the winning lottery numbers, and even walk on water. Life is good!

who tell you say JUJU no de work for Nigeria again, ok if juju no de work again how OBJ take rule Nigeria for good 8years and he finish still put in own person make he de rule. my people say charm way no work na him materials no complete;
if you no de fear i get one juju, allow me try am for your body, if you know turn to goat, call me goat.

dark age:

who tell you say JUJU no de work for Nigeria again, ok if juju no de work again how OBJ take rule Nigeria for good 8years and he finish still put in own person make he de rule. my people say charm way no work na him materials no complete;
if you no de fear i get one juju, allow me try am for your body, if you know turn to goat, call me goat.

Now, you remind me of the 2 boys wey go make juju about guns. On the babalawos instruction, one boy had to try the efficacy of the juju on his brother, using a loaded gun. You know the rest of the story, his brother is dead, and he is facing murder charges for shooting his brother. Want more tory like so?

@ thor, I have just found the perfect thread for you and ur not there!!!!!!!!!

Juju never existed juh.
All na unexplained illusions.
Witches passing through walls, blah blah blah, na lie

A-town:

Juju never existed juh.
All na unexplained illusions.
Witches passing through walls, blah blah blah, na lie

I agree, most are unexplained, but many have been explained already. From dreaming about your brother coming to kill you after eating late dinner, to schizophrenia in the observer, to poorly understood scientific phenomena like lightening, the list of what goes for juju goe on and on.

Yeah, you're absolutely right.
If we didn't know the phenomena behind cellphones and videophones, i bet we would have claimed that it is juju. "How can someone in london see/talk to someone in modakeke", chineke mi oo, juju!!!

How juju go take work when even the juju man no dey sincere.We are in more trouble in Naija than we realise. Someone should constitute a committe or commission like EFCC to investigate the problem of our Traditional insurance before it gets too late.