@uduak- i'm not on whatsapp

The rock5555:
Typing with snail speed....

make am fast na......choi!!!! Na where all doz damsels 4 dis thread dey na.....

#btw una gud evenin......

The rock5555: Vickie zion and Uncanny genuis-i dey watch una ooo.

Wher my hausa bouncer na and that sexy one, una go ASUU strike

The Rock, wetin we do? Your story sweet mehn!!!!! I can't help but laugh. More power to your elbows

WOMEN AFFAIRS
**************
The next day i went to the computer center in the morning because Joy called me the previous night that the girl i was doing assignments for wanted to see me. She knew that i was already frolicking with Lami's sister but that secret hatred of Lami exposing her had not be totally forgiven. The lecturer was really taking the morning students well not like mine that he was running all around for lectures in his school. I hissed when i was saw him but said nothing since he had no power over me in the morning section, he was sure going to deal with me in my lesson time but i had already erased the computer class out of my mind, if i cant collect my certificates because i did not finish my computer class then its better i use my brain knowledge of computer and go my way, i was coming to visit someone who is struggling to design a work and may get certificate while i was left behind, actually i dont take that certificate as nothing less than a piece of fuccking paper, what if it falls inside water, those that erases your brain, infact if am the president of Naija my first agenda would be to cancel all exams

---

"Helo Peter" Joy said as she saw me outside, Lami had not noticed me, she also came with one dumb looking girl, though she was fair, anyway i dont take fair girls as fine people sef.

"Good Morning, how did you manage to get my number?" I asked Joy.

"Dont bother about it, dont you remember that you filled a form before you were registered here" She reminded me, i smiled and nodded my head.

"So who is your freind that is smiling like she won Miss Naija?" I asked Lami, as i said Miss Naija the girl began smiling broadly.

"She is the person that you usually help to design her works" Lami explained as the girl came nearer and offered me a handshake.

"Ha wa yew, ma name i be Hannatu" The girl shot Naija most complex bullet ever constructed, i could not help but turn my back then waved my hands and bursted into laughter, i behaved like i was greeting someone on the road, when i suppressed the laughter i turned back to face them, they did know that i was laughing at them, infact Hanatu was also smiling, she was one of these Mada(the majority ethnic group in Nasarawa) girls but i think her dad was a Hausa man.

"Am fine, i was just learning with your work, am not that good" I replied modestly.

"Nor, yew good well well, i just dey get am pass everybodi, my teacher just dey hail me" She replied, i smiled and kept on gisting with her as Joy left us alone.

"So where is your house?" She asked me.

"Me show you house, lol, you miss road"I thought, well i dont show girls my house to avoid stories that touch, of all the girls i dated it was only Anna that knew my house.

"I dey town, and you?" I asked.

"I dey student village, i dey leave alone abi you wan come visity me?"

"Yes oo, no worry, i would come when i have time" I replied her, atleast i was glad that she stayed alone so no disturbance.

Student village as the name implies are houses close to College of Education, Akwanga, most of the rooms are mostly single fave me i face you rooms or for the well endowed students there are self contain flats with kitchen, toilets and a big room for them. The prices there are usually high because they are nearer to school.

"So you go dey help me dey do plenty assignments ba?" She requested.

"Elm no worry, i go dey help in your assignments" I replied, before i could finish talking she had hug me tight already, did i forget to say, she had huge biceps, sorry i meant huge bosom

I kept quiet till she left me, then she collected my number and a fake address which i gave to her before running back to class.

I smiled and sighed at the same time before walking back home to cook for my siblings.

---

"Man P-rooo" Someone shouted my nick name, maybe all my nocks starts from Man, maybe i was the cousin brother to Flow's Man wey dey reason.

I turned but saw no-one, i hissed and continue walking only for the i'diot to shout my name again, i ignored the person till i heard footsteps behind me, before i could turn a hot slap landed on the back of my head, Mama Otusha first son Francis was the culprit. All the lines i had in my head to blast Christy with washed away, he was expecting me to chase him but since i had used stealth mood to steal my dad's perfume i did not want to allow all the smell fade out.

I entered my dad room with my t-shirt and a wrapper, then i spalttered the shirt with perfume, wrapped it inside the wrapper and walked out with only my singlet, my dad was in the palour so i ran outside and placed the wrapper on a rope before dashing out before my dad would call me back.

So nothing would have prompt me make them all fade away because of Francis, i hissed and branched to Christy's house.

I matched in and knocked on their door only for her mother to open the door and stared at me strangly.

"Yes who are you looking for?" She asked.

"Am looking for ehm,," I forgot the name.

Is he stl typing?

Maka y

Lmao....na afraid make u 4get name abi wetin

HaHhhahaha ehhmm am looking for AKPORS him the? No b their comound b diz ok. Sorry ma. Dat z call swags of d swaggas. Just passing anyway I hail u rockMan

lmao . i could not help but turn my
back then waved my hands and bursted into
laughter, i behaved like i was greeting
someone on the road

Eleyi gidi gan!!!!!

Foxy_Flow: Give me your sister number n ow

PM but know say na u go collect insult tire

Uncanny Genius: The Rock, wetin we do? Your story sweet mehn!!!!! I can't help but laugh. More power to your elbows

Welcome sir..

@Tombilly- mak i catch apkors na

chade-na afraid oo

viqtoor and ruthia-i see una oo

time don go, make i type one small update....

Mehn!!!..dis ur upd8 2nyt no bellyful me at ol..ehn oga d rock

TRIPPLE WAHALA

---

"yes who are you looking for?" Christy mother asked me.

You know that situation you are in that makes your brain Memory card contact virus all of a sudden and you need to format it to start all over again but time does not seem to be on hands, the best way is to remove the memory card and use your phone memory, and that was what i did exctaly.

"Ehm ma, am, am looking for your daughter" I replied.

"Which one?" She fired another Jamb thriller.

"Ow ma, i don know wether they are plenty but am looking for one black one" I said again.

"But all my children are black na" She replied.

Then i remebered that Christy finished from my former school so i used that to my advantage.

"Ehm the one that finished from Gss Akwanga North" I said smiling.

"Ow You mean Christy, she went to church, she would be back later" The woman said and smiled which cooled my mind alittle, we talked a little before i left. My adventure had been cut short so i had no choice but to go play Playstation from Husiani's place. He welcomed and gave me his system as normal like before.

I played Residence Evil 4 from where i last saved till i was face to face with the boss, i smiled and was dealing with him when all of a sudden Nepa did what they knew best which meant i was gonna start fighting boss again.

"Husaini, how we go do na?" I asked the shop owner.

"Thats all na, abi you wan play again?" He said cooly.

"What so all my money don waste like that, chai I be mumu oo" I cried out and paid before promising myself not to ever near that shop again.

---

"Helo who is this?" I asked the caller from the other side of the line.

"Yew don forget Hanatu agin bah?" My new bullet shooting new girl was the one.

"Hey sorry, i did not save your number" I said and began spoiling her brain with nonsense words which sent her rolling around with laughter, her laughter sounded more like frog croaks.

Another call came in so i quickly answered it, it was Christy who was apologising for not informing me that she wont be around.

"You can come now please, my mum is not around" She pleaded so i quickly began jogging to her house, she was standing outside so i walked majestically while stylishly smelling myself to see wether my perf still dey function.

As i walked forward, Christy was telling me to watch out, before i realised her warnings i slipped and fell into a dirty swamp infront of me. It was really tripple wahala

---

Good nite ooo

Chai, see wetin woman wahala don cause

Hello rock!hw u doing?sorry 4 bn MIA,bn busy wit work...compliment of d season guys!

Ur popsy perfume dn fade nah...so the swamp smell wan replace am......
Nice 1 bro!

Rock o

Lol, y u 2 dey fall na

Keep up d gud work rock,u sure rock die

So I don reach here. Uduak ur story is infectious, once u start u can't stop. NYC wrk

Y una make everything dry like dis @rock?

So Man utd don do their worse ba

una weldone ooo. Typing while sulking.

@Clemzy-No be small woman wahala ooo

@Faith-chubby-welcome back miss. No tym oo, na hustling tinz sure pass. Compliments of the season also

@Ajobig-welcome man. Na swamp replace the perf oo.

@D. Ella. Luv-Ella ooo

@Ruthia-na over bouncing make me fall oo

@Modupeaderonke-Thanks ma'am

@Ladifeli- Thanks oo, am flattered.

@Brozules-no mind me oo, na too much stress.

xowie 2 divert o.2day was cool.uduak if u are 4rm akwa ibom state den u are lucky 2 ve godswill akpabio as a governor.my uncle had a wedding and guess wat,he came,1st lady{dame was represented},15 1st ladies came,labaran maku came,8ministers came.i was shocked

The rock5555: So Man utd don do their worse ba

una weldone ooo. Typing while sulking.

@Clemzy-No be small woman wahala ooo

@Faith-chubby-welcome back miss. No tym oo, na hustling tinz sure pass. Compliments of the season also

@Ajobig-welcome man. Na swamp replace the perf oo.

@D. Ella. Luv-Ella ooo

@Ruthia-na over bouncing make me fall oo

@Modupeaderonke-Thanks ma'am

@Ladifeli- Thanks oo, am flattered.

@Brozules-no mind me oo, na too much stress.

Leave man utd, dm dn kill my mood 4 2day.....I just weak!
Update, make I use ur story take dey console me'Self

The rock5555: So Man utd don do their worse ba

Hahaha!!!!! So una stil dey hope?

#TeamFcB

Nice story U have here Rock. Keep on rocking!

Chai! I don miss a lot! Nice one bro thumbs up

U neva sulk finish

MISS AMINA

---

"peter watch out!!" Christy shouted but i was too dumb or will i say i was so high on seeing a fine girl that i never looked down.

I slipped and feel into a smelly swamp that ran from their house, i quickly supported myself with my hands from falling fully.

"Hey sorry" Christy said and tried to drag me up. One thing i hate in this world is been helped up by a girl, dont blame me oo, then my pride was feeling so fly, but now even pikin fit correct me now.

I stood up carefullY and gave her a soured smile, all because of a girl i had stressed myself from stealing perfume to collecting a free slap, passing through Jamb Questions and now finally bathing in cool water. I frown my face and began walking away.

"Person no dey beg you again" She said sadly as i kept on going.

"Peter look at me" She said again, so i turned and saw her kneeling on the ground, without anyone asking me i ran back and helped her up before dudes start looking at me in a funny way because that her area was kind of a Muslim neigbourhood, and i guess you dont want to meet in a fight with a hausa man, they are very unpredictable.

We walked back together to heir Verandah and gisted till the dusk was closing in, she finally left me after i told her i would come the next day.

"oga i dey go A.A koto" I told the machine man my street name.

He nodded his head and obligued me to climb, when i was about climbing he stopped me and asked me to come down.

"Wetin na?" I asked.

"So as you big reach you dey piss for body? Abeg climb another bike" He said and sped off.

I sighed angrily and began trekking home, when i reached it was about an hour after my computer lesson was supposed to end and i usually come home aleast fifteen minutes after that time but i was damn late.

I hanged my shirt outside and entered bare chested while rubbing my stomach hungrily.

"Where are you coming from?" My dad asked.

"Uhm daddy if you see the kind typing the man gave me eh you would pity me, a whole twenty pages just for learning how to type" I gave a strong lie that could put devil to shame.

"Thats good, atleast you would know how to type verywell when you are through" My mother replied happily and gave me the most biggest food that night. I ate happily while congratulating myself on a great lie committed.

---

"Helo babe"

"Helo my boy freind" Hanatu replied, i raised my eye brow as she said 'boy freind', the girl dry jare, so no better name apart from boy friend.

"I wan see yew tomolo" She scattered my earpiece with her buhaha intonation. How wish her voice was as good as Ella own, all my problems for don finish

"Why do you want to see me?" I asked.

"Ehm, i get one book wey i no understand, i want make you help me explain am" She explained.

I agreed and went to bed happily, atleast i got one small runs or so i thought.

There was no chance to steal perfume the next day because my dad was sleeping inside so i informed him that i was going to see a friend before matching out to student village.

"I don reach oo" I said as Hanatu picked up the phone when i reached her area.

She came out smiling with another girl, i was discouraged because i was sure there would be no show that day.

"This na my friend, Amina" Hanatu introduced her friend to me. I gave her a fake smile and said nothing. She leaned close to Hanatu and wispered something in Hausa language.

I actually did not know Hausa then cus i was not in the mood of learning languages, actually i understand it well but i no wan still speak that dumb language.

"She say you na fine boy oo" Hanatu exposed their secret talk as Amina tried to cover her mouth but she was too late, i just smiled and kept quiet.

We walked into the compound and i opened my mouth in shock, i was expecting face me i face you house but it was actually a self contain flat. Hanatu must have been a big babe, yeah big babe wey no sabi speak english.

I walked into the most beautiful room i ever saw apart from Naija film, everything had a trace of pink on it, girls and pink eh, uhmm.

She had every gadgets that could make ones living enjoyable, i wriggled my body as the AC blew my worries away.

"You dey enjoy oo" I remarked and sat down on the thick rug carpet.

"Stand up jare and siddon for bed" Amina said and dragged me up, i tried breaking free and then touched her ar'se in the process, she was not putting on panties.

(dont ask me how i knew oo, i only do practicals, so incase you wan know how i know you fit send your babe come pantless to my room, i go tell her)

My heart skipped a beat as i sat down slowly on the plush bed and stared at the flat screen T.v on the wall. If na so students dey live, i dont mind being a student.

"I dey come now" Hanatu said and went out.

Immediately she left, Amina placed her leg on my laps, i jumped up and went to the Cds stand.

"Wetin na?" She asked me.

"I wan change film" I replied not knowing i was getting myself into a bigger mess.

---

typing continues immediately.

Uduak come post o...!

I'm loving these..Man must wack, For Food Only (FFO) fire on